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RE: No Name Dom? - 12/10/2007 10:39:18 PM

Phin

Posts: 1802
Joined: 2/26/2007
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I am with Red on this one...

you know that he is lying to his wife, why do you think that he will hold you in higher regard?

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Post #: 41

RE: No Name Dom? - 12/12/2007 1:48:37 PM

Leonardo

Posts: 113
Joined: 4/11/2005
Status: offline

I would give my thoughts, but already enough prima facie evidence exists that you will do whatever you want to do, regardless.

(in reply to AMasterPiece2009)

Post #: 42

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/7/2008 8:40:26 PM

justaDallasgirl

Posts: 38
Joined: 5/7/2008
From: the Rock
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AMasterPiece2009

I need some advice. I am married and have been chatting with a married dom for a couple of months. We have met in public recently, and the chemistry is definetly there. We have not been alone, but have been talking about having a session soon. The only concern I have is that he will not disclose his real name, phone number , or anything personal whatsoever and has no intention of doing so. He is afraid that a sub would contact his wife if the relationship ended badly. My concern is that, although my gut tells me he is safe, that there is no way to trace who he is if he is not safe. Does anyone have any suggestions on a compromise or how I should handle this? Please, no judgements on the cheating issue .. no need to feel any more guilty!

That right there is bullshit. His wife should know He is seeking someone else. Not only does this scream unsafe...but i hope Y/you both would be packing protection if you did meet with Him. Who knows...maybe He's been "meeting" with other subs doing the same thing. i would hate for you to be "another girl" for Him. my Master is married and His wife is vanilla. He had a sub for 3yrs before me and others before me until He moved here and got landed with me

He and i instant message each other even when He is home, i call His cell phone, W/we text constantly, He's even called me from His house, and i know His full name. Master gave me these things because He and i understand the importance off O/our jobs and discreetness. Although His wife knows of me she doesn't want to meet me...i do not want to meet her but i understand that certain days are her days and that she comes first. i am just a toy and i like it that way

He always wears His ring which i find endearing and sweet
i think a married Master 1) should not lie about His wife knowing 2) either introduce her via email/text/phone/person 3) never withhold names/phone numbers/etc

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Post #: 43

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/7/2008 8:54:08 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

He doesn't trust you. So then, why should you trust him?
In a relationship, each one must advance the other a certain amount of trust. The rest can then be earned. If he is unable to advance you enough trust to at least let you know the most basic information about him (I mean, c'mon. He won't even tell you his name? WTF?) then you have nothing. LEAVE IT.

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(in reply to AMasterPiece2009)

Post #: 44

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/7/2008 11:35:37 PM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AMasterPiece2009
My concern is that, although my gut tells me he is safe, that there is no way to trace who he is if he is not safe.
Does anyone have any suggestions on a compromise or how I should handle this?

I used to be involved in the adult entertainment industry. No ID, no service. You would be well advised to follow suit.
Also, 3 “safe calls” were always made.

1. Upon arrival in the presence of client
2. Upon leaving in the presence of client
3. A secret call within 5 minutes after 2nd call

If the secret code word was used in first two calls, police are called.
If the 3rd call doesn’t come, police are called.

Old proverb: “Better a thousand times careful than once dead.”

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Post #: 45

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/7/2008 11:49:40 PM

calamitysandra

Posts: 1682
Joined: 3/17/2006
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I would walk, I do not want to be an accessory to adultery. The safety aspect should be glaringly obvisious as well.

< Message edited by calamitysandra -- 5/7/2008 11:50:48 PM >

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Post #: 46

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 12:09:54 AM

hopelessfool

Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

/snark
Go for it, Meet him, dont take a cell phone, dont worry about wearing a condom, if your gut is telling you hes safe he must be right?
/end snark

Honestly, If someone not involved in the D/s lifestyle you were with in such a level and they wouldnt tell you their name you would have turned around and walked away, what makes it different just because hes the (I use this in sarcasm) Dom and your the sub? If you wouldnt agree to the situation with common sense involved what changes it because of titles or fancy words.

If he wont tell you and you meet him again ask him to pay for the coffee lean over his shoulder and grab a glance many wallets these days have a clear spot for ids so you dont have to pull them out and risk loosing. Same with credit card recipts....or you could get close seduce him hit him over the head with a salt shaker steal his wallet run into the girls room and use your cellphone to check up on him. But then, that might get the cops called on you...

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Post #: 47

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 6:14:20 AM

purepleasure

Posts: 6941
Joined: 4/9/2004
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
Status: offline

Personally, if he weren't willing to give you some factual information that you verify and you go through with meeting with him, at least have a cell phone or some other device with gps in case something goes horribly wrong. Your loved ones will wonder what may have happened to you.

Not to scare you or anything... but you just don't know. And I mean you REALLY just don't know.

(in reply to hopelessfool)

Post #: 48

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 6:16:29 AM

thornhappy

Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline

arrrrr me hearties, it's an ancient thread, risen like the undead....

thornhappy

(in reply to purepleasure)

Post #: 49

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 7:32:33 AM

deliteme

Posts: 34
Joined: 5/2/2008
From: Melbourne AUstralia
Status: offline

WOOOP WOOOOOP Danger Will Robinson Danger!!!

No name, no number, no meeting...easy

FFS - you could be meeting the latest version of Ted Bundy and not know it.

I may have only been into this for a few months but I don't care WHO I am meeting, I always have a name, number etc and I get there early just in case and in some cases I have organised with a friend to ring me with an "URGENT" call if things are hinky (ie you look at the Caller ID and if its all ok you answer the call..pretend its the reply from a business deal , recruitment agent or something likewise short yes no great ) and always apologise for taking the call. No answer..my friend calls the cops.

Serial killers and rapists look just like everyone else...

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Post #: 50

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 8:29:01 AM

parttimehotty

Posts: 4002
Joined: 11/19/2007
From: Virginville
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KyttynTheMynx

If you have children, take everything youve told them about "Stranger Danger", apply it to this situation, and move on. If it were me, I'd much rather have him end up being a really good guy that I cut loose, instead of something horrid happening...

Well said........but I also agree w/ Fangsfeet posted (Sorry, haven't figured out how to post more than 1 quote in my responses.
Do what you want and suffer the consequences. You're an adult.
Meet a man who has no name, fuck him, have him hurt you because he knows at this point, you meeting him not even knowing his name, he can do what he wants/get away with it. There's one born every minute.

Didn't realize it was an OLD thread!

< Message edited by parttimehotty -- 5/8/2008 8:30:09 AM >

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Post #: 51

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 8:45:20 AM

sirsholly

Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

old or not (the thread...not you, Pots) it bears repeating time after time. Use caution!!!!!

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Post #: 52

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 9:59:33 AM

ferriemistie

Posts: 51
Joined: 1/14/2007
Status: offline

i know this is an old thread but i figured i'd put in my 2 cents... A couple years back i served a married Dom.. His wife did not know about His intrest in the lifestyle and i'm not sure she would have approved of it.. BUT having said that He gave me His full name, phone number, work email addy etc.. (he was military) if He hadn't been willing to show me who He was i wouldn't have let Him into my life like i did... In the end i ended up ending the relationship because i felt horrible thinking what if He had been my husband and was sleeping around with someone else.. Plus i had the biggest fear of seeing Him with His family somewhere..

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 53

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 2:29:49 PM

Evility

Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline

I didn't realize this was a cold case thread.

< Message edited by Evility -- 5/8/2008 2:36:51 PM >

(in reply to MistressHolly71)

Post #: 54

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/8/2008 2:34:52 PM

Evility

Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline

Same.

< Message edited by Evility -- 5/8/2008 2:37:10 PM >

(in reply to Phin)

Post #: 55

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/9/2008 6:13:54 AM

adoracat

Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistressadj

I have the opposite trouble with subs....I would feel more comfortable knowing real names; but on the other hand, in some areas this type of activity is illegal. I can understand the reluctance to divulge information that could get someone in trouble. I have not yet come up with a solution that lets me feel comfortable yet lets my potential sub feel safe. I always give my name by the time we are ready to meet in real life, but I don't feel that I can demand the same from the sub.

ok...i will admit that Daddy didnt know my given name till we'd been together about 6 months. why? because i cannot STAND it. if i had the money, i would have changed it years ago. seriously.

and when he heard why i hate it, he agreed, and never has called me by that name, ever. but he knew my last name, and my phone number, and my address long before that, he'd visited me at my home, and i trusted him compltely, i just hate the name my mama put on me.

kitten

(in reply to mistressadj)

Post #: 56

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/9/2008 6:59:30 AM

xbutterflyx

Posts: 51
Joined: 7/18/2006
Status: offline

i would walk away..lots of other play/fuck partners with names...

If he can't trust you with his name etc...how could one turn herself over to him???

RED FLAG...

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 57

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/9/2008 9:26:34 AM

FRSguy

Posts: 653
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline

Wow, how hot is that!!!!
If it was the kind of thing where your hooking up once every couple of months for a back ally fuck with a trench coat guy then well that even hotter! You would have to take precausions but if hes the Connerys Bond type how could you walk away from it? If you take things really slow and keep them cautiously public then you could work your way to a hotel room so to speak... but what your talking about sound like way too much fun. Affairs like that could be a side fuck for years to come... got to love those public rest room quickies.

(in reply to xbutterflyx)

Post #: 58

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/9/2008 4:09:50 PM

nwcutie102

Posts: 162
Joined: 1/13/2008
Status: offline

no play... red flag to the max

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 59

RE: No Name Dom? - 5/9/2008 4:44:21 PM

Slave2Bob

Posts: 65
Joined: 3/29/2008
Status: offline

OK- go past the "Bundy Factor", this creep is treating you as he would a prostitute- without even offering to pay ! I suppose he knows YOUR name? You have just as much to lose as he does, marriage wise. I can't believe you have to ask ! Mr. No- Name wants to tie your ass up- then what are you gonna do? Something really creepy going on here. I wouldn't do it at this point even if he did show ID. My daughter goes to the same school where little Kimberly was taken by Bundy. She knows better than to go with a stranger, so should you. Be smart about this.

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(in reply to Phin)

Post #: 60

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