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oral sex - 1/2/2008 10:47:30 PM

Maestro66babycak

Posts: 396
Status: offline

Do You consider oral sex a submissive act? If so why? I asked my master to and he said no because it is a submissive act. When I asked him why he thought that he got mad and stopped talking to me. I want to understand why he thinks that, but he wont discuss it with me. Please enlighten me.
Thank you.

_____________________________

I live between the Rock and the Hard Place.

Post #: 1

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 10:48:56 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

I don't consider any act to be submissive or dominant. It is the person who is in control, not the activity. Sounds like your master has issues.

Cali

_____________________________

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(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 2

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 10:55:27 PM

darkpassenger434

Posts: 138
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline

I don't consider oral submissive per se. However, It certainly lends itself to submissive behavior. I would think its all in how its done. With that being said, your master is privy to his own thoughts on the matter. I could venture a few guess. It may just be a matter of his own opinion. Prehaps the trouble was in you asking for this "service" or in the way you asked. Without knowing your dynamic its hard to say. I'm curious that he got pissed about the whole thing when you asked. I personally love to be asked "why" when the intent to serve is there. Is it possible he's had a bad experience or something with this area that colors his perceptions?
-R

(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 3

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 10:58:08 PM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

I had a recent conversation with my Master about an act that he said "was submissive." I'm sorry your Master got mad at you for it. I told my Master I believe it is the intention behind an act that determines whether something is of a dominant or submissive nature. There are many women who don't like receiving oral sex, but whose Masters enjoy it and choose to feed off them whenever they want. In such a case, the act is hardly submissive. There are things my Master does to me which I absolutely love, and he does them only because my reaction entertains him. I brought that up and asked, is it a submissive act because I enjoy it?

He appreciated such scenarios and changed his stance.

Perhaps your Master became angry because you questioned him, or because he didn't know the answer. Some Masters believe that giving oral sex to a woman is a submissive act, because they see it as her using his mouth to service her pussy for her pleasure. I think it's men who do not enjoy such an act who tend to think this way.

(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 4

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 10:59:24 PM

Maestro66babycak

Posts: 396
Status: offline

I really dont think he has ever done it before. You may be right that I shouldnt have asked. But I dont know how he would know it was something I wanted or craved if I didnt ask, He certainly never brought up the subject.

_____________________________

I live between the Rock and the Hard Place.

(in reply to darkpassenger434)

Post #: 5

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:05:13 PM

darkpassenger434

Posts: 138
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline

The idea that it is wrong to ask about things you are curious about might be a dangerous road to start on. How can he Master if he doesn't know the contents of his own mind, how can you be what he wants if you don't know the same? Just a thought. Maybe it is in how you asked though. Do you have protocols for such things?
-R

(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 6

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:10:59 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

I personally wouldn't respect any one who got angry over me asking a question about why they feel something to be the way they did. Providing I asked respectfully, it's immature and juvinal to get mad at questions.

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Post #: 7

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:11:01 PM

MrRodgers

Posts: 10542
Joined: 7/30/2005
Status: offline

Almost all sex is almost all about my pleasure...oral sex included and being a pleasure is enough.

(in reply to darkpassenger434)

Post #: 8

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:13:03 PM

Bluebird

Posts: 384
Joined: 2/17/2006
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline

If he's 57 and never performed oral on a woman, he's probably uneasy about trying it. Or perhaps he's just selfish ...

And cutting off communication because you asked a simple question seems pretty immature for a man that age. Obviously I don't know your dynamic, but if you truly just asked and didn't whine, seems like an opportunity for discussion/learning/mutual fun rather than a cause for anger.

_____________________________

Love is patient, love is kind. I am neither. Get over it.

(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 9

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:15:41 PM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Maestro66babycak

I really dont think he has ever done it before. You may be right that I shouldnt have asked. But I dont know how he would know it was something I wanted or craved if I didnt ask, He certainly never brought up the subject.

I have asked my Master, "I'm curious, Master, why you have not ever done such n such? Is it something you do not enjoy?" Other ways of telling him you crave something is to simply tell him you crave it and ask if it's something he would be interested in trying. I don't know if you were being confrontational, but in the event you were, that may have been what set him off?

(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 10

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:17:46 PM

MissMagnolia

Posts: 3636
Status: offline

Have you thought he maybe just isn't in to it?

I'm a female D and have never given head to a sub. I don't enjoy it, it doesn't do it for me and that's that.

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Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.

(in reply to Bluebird)

Post #: 11

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:18:41 PM

christine1

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

i'm struggling with this very issue at the moment...i've been taking to a dominant for years now and whenever i ask him a question he gets very retalliatory (sorry about spelling, and if i just made up a word...yay me! hehehe)

anyway, i've just in the last week distanced myself from him, but all the same, it is hard to be rejected or criticized over a sincere question and i don't think it is admirable in the least....just my two cents.

(in reply to Bluebird)

Post #: 12

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:20:38 PM

darkpassenger434

Posts: 138
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline

Given the last post I wanted to raise a point/question. It seems to me that oral on a man lends itself much more easily to submission and oral on a woman could go either way. When I think of head, my immediate conception of it is submissive, although I can think about it and see it from the other angle. I can easily see oral on a woman being dominant. Thoughts?
-R

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

Post #: 13

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:23:26 PM

Maestro66babycak

Posts: 396
Status: offline

The only protocols he has ever given me is , when I want or need something I am to say please may I have ...and end with Sir... other than that he has not said. All I know is he is very mad at me , and I am bewildered as to why. That is why I asked the OQ ... I was hoping that someone could explain why oral sex was a submissive act. (frankly I disagree , I think oral sex is simply a sex act to be enjoyed -no matter who is doing it to whom) ( please forgive my horrid grammar in this post, I am tired and cranky and southern)

_____________________________

I live between the Rock and the Hard Place.

(in reply to darkpassenger434)

Post #: 14

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:24:03 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

No act is submissive or Dominant. It's the intent behind the act.

Master Fire

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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 15

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:27:06 PM

georgejames68

Posts: 72
Joined: 1/28/2006
Status: offline

INTERESTING RESPONSE FROM YOUR MASTER.... I think many men might respond that way as they see it as a somewhat submissive act.

I think differently however, I see it as an infinitely variable, innovative way to control my woman. I use it to control just how long, how thoroughly and how intensly I can drive her crazy with need, desire, and (by holding off on the completion of the act) just how bananas I can drive her using that technique. Nothing quite as intensly controlled as a woman tied, (even if mentally), in some open and available position, and forced to endure my touch and my tongue for a few hours at a time!

Especially when she is sure that she will then be coerced into entertaining me in a similar way! Did I mention I am an oral nut????

George

(in reply to Maestro66babycak)

Post #: 16

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:28:42 PM

darkpassenger434

Posts: 138
Joined: 1/1/2008
Status: offline

Well, oral is definetly not a purely submissive act. You might have a real problem if you're following protocols and he's still freaking out. Its not easy for us, but we do have a responsibility to master ourselves too. If you are obeying and there are still problems then that seems to me to be really bad. Just my thoughts though.
-R

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 17

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:29:55 PM

Phin

Posts: 1802
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline

Oral sex is what you make of it. I was playing with another toppy switch, the scene started as me on top, at one point she was on her knees with her back turned to me, she turned around and took me in her mouth, and I was Hers to do with what She wanted.

I also enjoy giving oral. coupling it with orgasm denile or just because you enjoy it can be empowering.

_____________________________

"Isn't wonderful when our bruises show what we hide in the back of our heads?"Fayetteville band, Nephilym

"He is my angel, my devil, my naughty boy, but above anything else my Master"My girl sin

(in reply to darkpassenger434)

Post #: 18

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:30:05 PM

Maestro66babycak

Posts: 396
Status: offline

No girlie I was not being confrontational I had asked what I thought was a simple question. Let me tell you I WONT be asking that again. Thank you for trying to answer my question and trying to help me understand.

_____________________________

I live between the Rock and the Hard Place.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 19

RE: oral sex - 1/2/2008 11:33:32 PM

Maestro66babycak

Posts: 396
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bluebird

If he's 57 and never performed oral on a woman, he's probably uneasy about trying it. Or perhaps he's just selfish ...

And cutting off communication because you asked a simple question seems pretty immature for a man that age. Obviously I don't know your dynamic, but if you truly just asked and didn't whine, seems like an opportunity for discussion/learning/mutual fun rather than a cause for anger.

Well actually he is 59... you may have a point there Ma'am, I wonder why he couldnt just say that instead of getting mad at me .... and NO I was not whining at all . I know better than that.
Thanks for trying to helpme understand.

_____________________________

I live between the Rock and the Hard Place.

(in reply to Bluebird)

Post #: 20

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