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RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/3/2005 3:39:28 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Do you know how many years you can waste by investing six months/person in getting to know, than meeting them and finding you'd rather have sex with a flaming porcupine?


::::Hiding my fire extinguisher and asbestos condoms::::

What porcupine?

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 181
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/3/2005 11:56:16 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Do you know how many years you can waste by investing six months/person in getting to know, than meeting them and finding you'd rather have sex with a flaming porcupine?



::::Hiding my fire extinguisher and asbestos condoms::::

What porcupine?
Perfect ending to an angry rant! Sense of humor is so necessary. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 182
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/4/2005 4:36:06 AM   
frenchpet


Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

LOL!!!

It's Not Just You. Really. :)

Case in point---I spent over an hour in chat (okay, I was multitasking) with a guy who could NOT carry on a conversation or pass on any useful intel. When I asked him about the long silences, he said he was waiting for me to ask him questions!! I explained the difference between conversation and INTERVIEW, but it didn't sink in. He didn't ask a whole lot about me, either. Hmmmmmmm


In a perfect world, all other subs would be like this and Dommes would have to fight for me... Just dreaming :).


quote:

ORIGINAL: MsHoney2you
And I love the part when they say "I'll do anything for you" but when I tell them to bring the board and a 4" nail, darn they seem to hesitate quick enough!

oops... Somewhere in my profile i say something like this... i guess i should reformulate it into something much less definitive. Reading profiles and posts on this forum made me understand i was really not nearly as submissive as many out here (but are they all honest ? How many are just fantasizing ?).
In fact i thought "doing anything" as in doing anything to make Her life more comfortable and fun, from massaging and bathing Her to letting Her use me as a footstool (and obviously cooking etc., I include kissing feet in vanilla preliminaries and doing cunnilingus in vanilla sex).
Anyway, no dominant woman would decide to hurt me so bad that I couldn't keep on massaging or doing oral services properly, She'd miss it too much. So maybe i needn't bother changing my profile :). Or should i ? Any answer welcome.

(in reply to MsHoney2you)
Profile   Post #: 183
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/4/2005 6:54:32 AM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: frenchpet
Anyway, no dominant woman would decide to hurt me so bad that I couldn't keep on massaging or doing oral services properly, She'd miss it too much. So maybe i needn't bother changing my profile :). Or should i ? Any answer welcome.


[laughing] You haven't met some of my friends.

I really really would urge you to reconsider the word "anything." I recall a scene from the old TV show "The Equalizer" where a runaway girl tells another, experienced, runaway "I'll do anything for some money" and the other girl says really softly, "You have no idea what anything means."




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(in reply to frenchpet)
Profile   Post #: 184
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/4/2005 8:14:25 AM   
frenchpet


Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

[laughing] You haven't met some of my friends.

I really really would urge you to reconsider the word "anything." I recall a scene from the old TV show "The Equalizer" where a runaway girl tells another, experienced, runaway "I'll do anything for some money" and the other girl says really softly, "You have no idea what anything means."

oops... OK thanks ! I just reformulated my profile... again. I guess I'm really a vanilla guy after all, just a bit nicer than average with my partner, and very slightly submissive (compared to what I've seen on this forum ! )...
Probably this reformulation will turn off some Dommes, but I can't really get much less messages than I get now... And the point is be as close as possible to the truth, imho, not to play silly games...

C'mon, Dommes and Switches ! check out my profile ! (I'll change country soon, not sure yet...) Plus I can dance, and I'm kinda cute... Ah well...

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 185
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/4/2005 8:52:42 AM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		I don't see any whining Dommes here. I see some pretty eloquent exchange that would truly help a sub if he bothered to read this board. It DOES get wearisome to email back and forth, essentially asking the same basic questions to prospective subs, only to receive one liners or worse, outright insults in return. Thereto, I am also guilty of checking My email when I'm out of sorts or frustrated from a previous contact and My responses get terse or blunt and I'm sure the unsuspecting sub trying his best to communicate in this venue is at a total loss to know why. (Kudos to you, malesub4domme, in your participation here. That's something in your favor! ;) ) As for Me, I always try to keep in perspective the fact that communication, written or otherwise, is seldom a man's forte. They're such visually oriented buggers, whether sub or Dom, and there's no getting around that. I'd rather have an auto mechanic who's handy with home repairs than Tolstoy any day! I'll often engage in a volley of short emails simply because the subs profile interests Me. I also don't put as much emphasis on written communication skills as I do verbal skills and protocol once we actually connect via phone. I don't want a gabby sub during a session, but I do want a man who knows how to express himself succinctly. There's a fine line between eloquence and verbosity, between reticence or humility and incommunicative silence. I try to draw a sub out the best I can because it's a shame to think that perhaps the jewel of a fellow that I'm searching for is hiding behind not so perfect writing skills. To wit: boyz, fill out your profiles, use your journal entries and for goodness sakes put a modest pic on there somewhere so I know I'm not talking to the same silly porno oriented twit that I crossed off the list yesterday! Texas Maam

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 186
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/4/2005 10:10:26 AM   
MrPost


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/30/2005
Status: offline 		I have a skewed view of starting a relationship with a Domme, please have some patience while I explain. From a male sub point of view, meeting a Domme is similar to getting a job. Jobs come around by two primary means, either by networking or by responding to an offer/want ad.
Networking is done at the various munches, club socials, and events done throughout the States. This takes time, fishing to find out whose available, if your personalities mesh, and you meeting people on a relatively equal basis. The Domme tends to get to know you as a person first, then as a potential prospect in a relatively informal basis. If it is agreeable to both parties, things move on from there.
The second, a lot more common now thanks to the internet, is from the want ads. The sub peruses the profiles on an esteemed site such as this one, finds a couple that he has an interest in based on the type of “employment” he is looking for and sends his resume, better known as a letter of introduction.
If the Domme is interested in the resume, then she may ask for further information or a meeting, and things move on from there.
Based on this paradigm, the initial contact (resume) has to give enough information to get their interest, but not overly long so that the person starts to doze off while reading it. The next steps can be perceived as a job interview. The sub must be interesting, have their own goals (which will hopefully coincide with the Domme’s), have confidence in whatever skills they possess, and leave a good impression on the interviewer. There are a multitude of books available on how to act, dress, and speak during a job interview and what employers are looking for.
They are not looking for a “yes man,” or in D/s vernacular “Whatever Mistress wants” nor are they interested in people using them for their own goals, the “I want this, and this, and you must wear 4 inch or higher heels.”
Continuing on, this is a supply and demand field. The more applicants for a certain position, the fiercer the competition is, the more the employer can pick and choose. This is the world of a male sub. Inversely, if there a lot of job openings, say for 20-30 year old female submissives, yet fewer applicants, the employer must either lower their standards or offer unique incentives.
I hope I have totally confused everyone with my thoughts.
MrPost.



_____________________________

I groan for the present sorrow. I groan for the sorrow to come. I groan questioning when there shall come a time when He shall ordain a limit to my suffering.
Aeschylus, Prometheus Bound

(in reply to TexasMaam)
Profile   Post #: 187
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/4/2005 10:44:41 AM   
MsPurrmeow


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrPost
I have a skewed view of starting a relationship with a Domme, please have some patience while I explain. From a male sub point of view, meeting a Domme is similar to getting a job. Jobs come around by two primary means, either by networking or by responding to an offer/want ad.


This is very well laid out, and very true in many respects. Thank you for that.

This would be an interesting spin-off thread. As a topic on it's own merit, it would be interesting to see the feedback.

Purr

(in reply to MrPost)
Profile   Post #: 188
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/5/2005 3:29:37 AM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		**RUNS SCREAMING FOR THE HILLS!!**

quote:

Getting to the last class, those who really and truly want to be with a Domme and really and truly want to have a real D/s relationship - how often do emails sent to Dommes get deleted without response for another reason altogether having nothing to do with what he has said - location wrong, picture undesirable, not a very good writer. After a month of pouring your heart out (as far as you are concerned) and getting nowhere, how often is a sub going to take the time to put the work in defining himself to every Domme that may or may not show any interest whatsoever? In the first email? And does a Domme want to read every subbies War and Peace Epci in the first response?


Just when I was taking pride in My ability to give subs the opportunity to communicate with Me with those "less than perfect emails", I jump online last night to find that same 'submale' flooding My inbox with those plaintive "i should be beaten" one liners. Once in awhile it would be followed by "beat me to make me understand my place", etc.


ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Delete, delete, delete. BLOCK. OK I'm guessing that was a Domme or Dom torquing Me anyway.

Texas Maam

(in reply to toran29)
Profile   Post #: 189
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/5/2005 3:34:21 AM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrPost
Continuing on, this is a supply and demand field. The more applicants for a certain position, the fiercer the competition is, the more the employer can pick and choose. This is the world of a male sub. Inversely, if there a lot of job openings, say for 20-30 year old female submissives, yet fewer applicants, the employer must either lower their standards or offer unique incentives.
I hope I have totally confused everyone with my thoughts.
MrPost.




Hmmm. lower My standards? Never. Offer incentives. Hmmmmm. Hmmmmm... what incentive would get mister 'i think you should beat me' OUT of My inbox? Texas Maam

(in reply to MrPost)
Profile   Post #: 190
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/6/2005 3:46:46 AM   
LaughingDan


Posts: 18
Joined: 8/24/2005
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissRebeckah
~ some are not really expecting it to work out, so they don't put much effort into responding. They're giving up before starting. {A way of rejecting you before you reject them.}


Interesting thought. I have come across female subs that contact me with simple one-liners and then don't make much effort in responding to subsequent follow-ups... yet still keep me in their hotlist and MSN contacts etc.

_____________________________

I write random stuff too.

(in reply to MissRebeckah)
Profile   Post #: 191
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/6/2005 6:29:02 AM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

They are not looking for a “yes man,” or in D/s vernacular “Whatever Mistress wants”

=================
then i guess you havent met the dommes "I" have met, huh?
EVERY DOMME i have met wants a yes-man. someone that will do as they are told.
including my present new Mistress.

i have not met any other kind.

wolf


_____________________________

"there is no gravity, life sucks!"


(in reply to MrPost)
Profile   Post #: 192
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/6/2005 3:20:45 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		We expect OBEDIENCE Wolf, yes. What we do NOT want is mindless robots who cannot think for themselves and therefore cannot follow any but the simplest directions.

May I suggest that your experience has not been the widest, or the most common?

Ms Francine

(in reply to lonewolf05)
Profile   Post #: 193
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/6/2005 6:01:13 PM   
MrPost


Posts: 15
Joined: 8/30/2005
Status: offline 		To begin with, sorry don’t have the “Cut and Paste” of quotes quite down yet. A little clarification of my allegory above based upon the responses.

MsPurrmeow,
Publicly, thank you, I’ll post the thread tomorrow, I don’t want to hijack this one.

TexasMaam,
There is no need to lower your standards, female Dommes are in high demand, I was thinking about male Doms looking for female subs. Unfortunately, since there are so few Dommes, you become targets for the yaroos that plague the online “You Must be 18 to Enter” zones. Sorry, there is no security to escort the person from the property, except for the provider (and I see you already have notified CM). I wish I could help.

Lonewolf05,
There are certain bosses that want only yes-men around them, so you are correct in the sense that SOME Dommes might only want that. But to over generalize and say that every Domme has the aforementioned requirement is similar to (keeping it in the business context) assuming that every American will buy big V-8 gas guzzlers, gotta love the seventies. Chances are that I have met a Domme or two of that type, but since we would have been looking for very different things in a relationship, nothing would have come from the meetings.

LadyHibiscus,
I believe it is called “enlightened self-interest.” What is good for the company is good for me, so I will do as they say. And the company reciprocates by listening to the workers. Studies have shown that all dynamics of the business improve when there is intercourse between the two parties. Correlations between that and the D/s relationship? Except the word “intercourse” of course.

If I have offended or irked off anyone, please wait until tomorrow when I start a different thread for all the “What do you know?” “You suck” and even the rare kudos so as not to deviate from the original post.

MrPost

PS Yaroo is Japanese for (not literally) fucking POS trash.


_____________________________

I groan for the present sorrow. I groan for the sorrow to come. I groan questioning when there shall come a time when He shall ordain a limit to my suffering.
Aeschylus, Prometheus Bound

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 194
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/7/2005 7:15:42 AM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline 		the line of..you must be 18 to enter.....maybe someone needs to start a site where ya have to be 30 to get in? or some very such?????

wolf


_____________________________

"there is no gravity, life sucks!"


(in reply to MrPost)
Profile   Post #: 195
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/7/2005 12:37:52 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

There is no need to lower your standards, female Dommes are in high demand, I was thinking about male Doms looking for female subs
I disgreed with you when I read it the first time you said it, and still do after you've explained it.
Human relationships are not the same as business at all. If a dom/me is self suficient, there is no reason to ever lower one's standards. I don't need to have someone with a penis serving me in order to carry on with life and fun... I admit it would be more interesting and more fun, but that can only happen if I don't lower my standards.
I'm not saying it's okay to be anal/specific about height/weight/appearance, abilities, experience, financial, etc... I think that once one decides what is significant as partners go, than standards need not be lowered (supply and demand not withstanding), because lowering standards usually lead to increased misery, break ups, divorces, etc...
quote:

If I have offended or irked off anyone, please wait until tomorrow when I start a different thread for all the “What do you know?” “You suck” and even the rare kudos so as not to deviate from the original post
This was funny. I don't think you suck, and in fact don't think sucking is a bad thing some days. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MrPost)
Profile   Post #: 196
RE: Grrrrrr.... - 9/8/2005 7:12:06 AM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

We expect OBEDIENCE Wolf, yes. What we do NOT want is mindless robots who cannot think for themselves and therefore cannot follow any but the simplest directions.

May I suggest that your experience has not been the widest, or the most common?

Ms Francine

==============================

well? Ya know....the issue is,....that "I" am more vanilla alpha macho and less docile slave-minded.....and THAT causes a lot of problems in my daily life..both online AND real time.
cannot follow simplest directions? okay so i am a headache from the get-go. with my o.c.d. and p.t.s.d.---i sometimes get over stressed and i have difficulty keeping a routine...because i often have-to write it all down or i lose what i was doing. i can get out of my chair to go get a cup of coffee, take 3 steps and forget what i was doing at times. i cannot handle much stress.
so maybe i am not "normal" and never will be. after my breakdown in '01...i haven't been the same since.

not the most common experiences? i don't know coz the guys "I" talk to say the EXACT same thing.......AND i am sorry to report that it becomes an issue wherein a lot of males start believing ALL females are money-crazy...................................
especially online.......but real life dating too...no money no fancy cars..no dates.
take care

wolf



_____________________________

"there is no gravity, life sucks!"


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 197
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