RE: Who Pays for the Travel?

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:43:23 PM

agoodgirl4Daddy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

how bout this...

you and someone agree to meet, and you get your own hotel room, board your pets, and pay for your gas and put mileage on your car to meet the person.

the person stands you up...... without even bothering to speak to you directly..leaves voicemails (the type that can be left without your phone ringing) or text messages....

the person says they'll pay for your trip..but that's been going on for quite some time....and you've not gotten any money in the mail (as initally requested) or sent to your pay pal account (which you've requested...as this person requested).

what do you think? should this person pay your hotel and travel expenses .... especially after they've told you they would????

*frustrated girl who is convinced there are way too many wankers in the lifestyle*

I'd have dumped their ass after standing me up the first time.

i didn't say he was getting another chance.

i'm simply saying that he has shown little to no honor so far, and i'm giving him one last chance to prove that he isn't a complete wanker.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:44:36 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

i didn't say he was getting another chance.

i'm simply saying that he has shown little to no honor so far, and i'm giving him one last chance to prove that he isn't a complete wanker.

After you paid for all that and he stood you up without a good reason, I don't care how much money he puts in your paypal, it would just be buying you off IMO. Also, I highly doubt you are going to get it. It sucks that you lost the money but at leaast he showed his true colors early!

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/13/2008 1:45:23 PM >

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:47:47 PM

agoodgirl4Daddy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

i didn't say he was getting another chance.

i'm simply saying that he has shown little to no honor so far, and i'm giving him one last chance to prove that he isn't a complete wanker.

After you paid for all that and he stood you up without a good reason, I don't care how much money he puts in your paypal, it would just be buying you off IMO.

it's not buying me off if i refuse further contact after i get the money he has promised me! it's simply the right thing for him to do.

and after kissing way too many frogs (just a figure of speech..i really don't kiss amphibious creatures) in this lifestyle, i really really want to be proven wrong in my thinking that there are too many people in this "lifestyle" who are full of fucking horse shit. Is that so much to ask? LOL ... hmmmm...mebbe so....

*a girl who is really trying to hold onto her sense of humor*

< Message edited by agoodgirl4Daddy -- 1/13/2008 1:51:01 PM >

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:47:48 PM

KatyLied

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quote:

*frustrated girl who is convinced there are way too many wankers in the lifestyle*

It's not a lifestyle issue. It's a people issue. Some people are flakes. Some people have issues.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:48:19 PM

Rushemery

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depends on the situation

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:49:09 PM

agoodgirl4Daddy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

*frustrated girl who is convinced there are way too many wankers in the lifestyle*

It's not a lifestyle issue. It's a people issue. Some people are flakes. Some people have issues.

oh..i'm fully aware of that! however, in my view of this "lifestyle" honor and intergrity and respect are at the top of the list....

just not finding many with those qualities...

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:50:40 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

it's not buying me off if i refuse further contact after i get the money he has promised me! it's simply the right thing for him to do....

and after kissing way too many frogs in this lifestyle, i really really want to be proven wrong in my thinking that most of ppl are full of fucking horse shit...is that so much to ask? LOL ... hmmmm...mebbe so....

*a girl who is really trying to hold onto her sense of humor*

Honestly, if he is scummy enough to have you spend the money and stand you up, I don't think he is honest enough to give you the money when you aren't going to talk to him anymore afterwards. Kinda like holding onto an ex's favorite jacket so they will still call you.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:50:41 PM

KatyLied

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quote:

in my view of this "lifestyle" honor and intergrity and respect are at the top of the list....

That's not true. The lifestyle is a way for people to meet their needs. It doesn't mean it is more filled with honor, integrity or respect than any other lifestyle or any other people.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:53:05 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

oh..i'm fully aware of that! however, in my view of this "lifestyle" honor and intergrity and respect are at the top of the list....

just not finding many with those qualities...

People in the lifestyle are just that - people. Some will be nice, some will be mean. Some you will like, some you will hate. Some are respectful, some are disrespectful. Some are blunt, others aren't. Some are straight forward about things they don't like, others are passive-aggressive. Some are honest, others aren't.

Expecting better out of someone simply because they are in a lifestyle of any sort is setting yourself up to be let down.

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It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 1:55:47 PM

agoodgirl4Daddy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

it's not buying me off if i refuse further contact after i get the money he has promised me! it's simply the right thing for him to do....

and after kissing way too many frogs in this lifestyle, i really really want to be proven wrong in my thinking that most of ppl are full of fucking horse shit...is that so much to ask? LOL ... hmmmm...mebbe so....

*a girl who is really trying to hold onto her sense of humor*

Honestly, if he is scummy enough to have you spend the money and stand you up, I don't think he is honest enough to give you the money when you aren't going to talk to him anymore afterwards. Kinda like holding onto an ex's favorite jacket so they will still call you.

i'm not holding onto the proverbial jacket...i'm just wanting to put some wasted money back in my bank account. LOL

after the end of business today (when his last email to me said he'd be making the transfer of funds), if my Pay Pal account doesn't show that the deposit has been made, i will drop it...mostly for the sake of myself and my friends who've heard about this asshole for a couple weeks now!

if, for him, giving me the money he promised me would be to make "nice"...so be it... i guess he'll be disappointed when i tell him to fuck off.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:07:57 PM

KatyLied

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quote:

i guess he'll be disappointed when i tell him to fuck off.

Chances are he was playing on-line games with you and has already moved on to the next person of interest.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:09:44 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: agoodgirl4Daddy

i'm not holding onto the proverbial jacket...i'm just wanting to put some wasted money back in my bank account. LOL

after the end of business today (when his last email to me said he'd be making the transfer of funds), if my Pay Pal account doesn't show that the deposit has been made, i will drop it...mostly for the sake of myself and my friends who've heard about this asshole for a couple weeks now!

if, for him, giving me the money he promised me would be to make "nice"...so be it... i guess he'll be disappointed when i tell him to fuck off.

No, I'm saying he is holding onto the jacket.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:14:15 PM

angelslave77

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In our case Sir has definately outlayed the most money but he is in a better position to do that. Single,works full time, has a business, living at home at the moment, compared to me, a single mum of 4 who scrapes just to make ends meet most weeks. He has made numerous trips to me compared to my one to him (although that is also to do with the time constraints of being a single mum). He is relocating here to be with us and I dont think I will be much help with the cost there either.

But at the moment I am searching for work so that once he is here and our fianances are combined I will feel I am contributing more fully to the household

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:18:57 PM

adoracat

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
Kinda like holding onto an ex's favorite jacket so they will still call you.

what?? you're supposed to give the jackets back??? huh. *scritches head, thinking about the 3 leather jackets from one guy and the baja jacket she snagged this past weekend from another*

nope, jackets are mine forever. mine mine mine!!!!

seriously, in my case Daddy comes to see me at my home. mr baja jacket drove here, got a very nice hotel room, kept me for the best part of 3 days and paid for everything. he's also going to fly me to houston once he's moved into his new house. i know what he makes, he can afford to. and the jacket was fair game after he refused to return an item or two of my clothing LOL

would i expect for someone to spend lots of money on me? no. am i shocked and appreciative when i am spoiled? yes.

kitten, snuggling a new teddybear she got this past weekend too.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:21:44 PM

littlesarbonn

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I'm not a dominant, but if I was to have someone visit me (and we were developing a mutual relationship), and I told her I was going to pay her way to get here, I can't imagine myself playing games and not paying. Why even waste the time?

Some times I think I should just become a dominant because I always feel like doing the things the way I believe one actually should, but I see so much of this game playing that it constantly causes me to wonder why do these people even exist. Maybe I just missed my calling.

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:25:11 PM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: adoracat

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
Kinda like holding onto an ex's favorite jacket so they will still call you.

what?? you're supposed to give the jackets back??? huh. *scritches head, thinking about the 3 leather jackets from one guy and the baja jacket she snagged this past weekend from another*

nope, jackets are mine forever. mine mine mine!!!!

*laughs* It's ok. I still have some of the clothes I "borrowed" from exes. Just too damn comfy to give back!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:27:37 PM

GreedyTop

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last year I was involved with a guy in the Netherlands. I visited him twice.. he paid my airfare both times, covered almost all my expenses (food etc.. I stayed with him). Then he flew to San Francisco to meet me there at Folsom. I paid my own airfare for that, as well as getting us the employee rate at the hotel we stayed at.
Lopsided? yes, but he could much better afford it.
I pay what I can, when I can, but if the other person is able and willing to cover or contribute to the expenses, I'm not too proud to accept it. *shrug*

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:28:20 PM

MissHarlet

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I think it depends entirely on the situation and the persons involeved. I have rather oldfashioned ideas of who should pay based on gender roles. However if things have progressed to where I am comfortable enough to have them as a guest in my home, at that time I am providing most meals etc. so it evens out. Relocation expenses are another issue entirely depending again on who is moving where and who is most able to contribute. Its a very individual decision.

I will say however, that is someone says they are going to pick up all expenses, I would have that money in my pocket and/or the tickets and reservations confirmed as paid in full, before I left home

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:29:21 PM

adoracat

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: adoracat

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub
Kinda like holding onto an ex's favorite jacket so they will still call you.

what?? you're supposed to give the jackets back??? huh. *scritches head, thinking about the 3 leather jackets from one guy and the baja jacket she snagged this past weekend from another*

nope, jackets are mine forever. mine mine mine!!!!

*laughs* It's ok. I still have some of the clothes I "borrowed" from exes. Just too damn comfy to give back!

exactly! besides, its also like being wrapped in a hug from them....and since some of the guys are no longer walking the earth, its a comfort.

sometimes i wish wolf wasnt such a darling skinny lil man, cause my tits wont fit in his shirts!

kitten, grinning

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RE: Who Pays for the Travel? - 1/13/2008 2:36:34 PM

SirJohnMandevill

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

SO's paying for his own travel here (and so will i when i visit him in March/April). we're both co-paying for relocation expenses.

Same here. I'm meeting someone in about three weeks, and I'm paying all the way, including taking her to dinner.

Relocation expenses are something I believe you negotiate. Ideally, as a Dominant, I'd feel better paying my own relocation expenses, or those of my submissive if she's the one relocating. Not sure how practical that would be in reality. It'll depend on several yet-to-be-determined financial factors.

Les (Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink)

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