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RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:02:40 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

If your people are watching my people, then who's watching us?

Cali

<-- little watcher person

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:03:50 PM

Posts: 2929
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

IrishMist secretly, or not-so-secretly, stalks me relentlessly. She thinks that I don't know, but I have people.

Cali

My people are watching your people

...................and my people are watching both of you!
My People:

_____________________________

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:04:13 PM

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

If your people are watching my people, then who's watching us?

Cali
<-- little watcher person

Those people

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:07:29 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

As long as you're getting what you NEED Miss Irish, I have no problem with all the peeping toms that are in your employ. See how I dragged that back to the topic?

Cali
(exhibitionist? me? nevehhhh!)

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:09:04 PM

Posts: 616
Joined: 9/20/2007
From: in servitude
Status: offline

Wow! Just getting my breath back from reading this thread! Just wanted to ask the OP a question -
Are you sure you want to be submissive to this man? Or perhaps you want to be submissive to someone and he just happens to be nearest? i was not getting what i 'wanted' from my Master in terms of how i imagined a M/s relationsip should be until i realised, understood and accepted what it really meant. His will, His needs and His wants come before my own. My own deep happiness comes from knowing my obedience makes Him happy. Whilst He is not a dictator and i, for the greater part run my own life, His slave is always ready to obey. Because of this, i know i will get rewards (as well as punishment) - and yes He has bathed me once a la Secretary!

Whilst you may love your boyfriend, as i do mine, he cannot even hope to dominate you unless you let him.

Gabrielle x

_____________________________

Slave to Master Slayer

~ Host of the Rather Marvelous Greenwich Munch ~

"There is no such thing as liberty. You only change one sort of domination for another. All we can do is to choose our master."
D. H. Lawrence

(in reply to MistressOfGa)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:09:58 PM

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Joined: 11/17/2005
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Hmm...not sure I am getting what I need....though watching is certainly giving me what I want. To get what I need....Red has to be on the pole with her people watching MistressofGa's people so that my people can watch your people and then that frees the way for those people to watch us

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 2:47:42 PM

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Joined: 7/7/2007
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I know what you need.............(nods knowingly)

Jeff

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 3:12:37 PM

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Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

Hmm...not sure I am getting what I need....though watching is certainly giving me what I want. To get what I need....Red has to be on the pole with her people watching MistressofGa's people so that my people can watch your people and then that frees the way for those people to watch us

Right. I am certainly NOT getting what I need. So, to remedy this, IrishMist and I will get on pole, our people will get Cali's peeps and MistressofGa's peeps to come to the show and pay us lots of money since I am out of work now.

Then, we can have a major orgy with handpicked peeps. Jefff can be the evil emcee.

'K?

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 3:56:15 PM

Posts: 2929
Status: offline

quote:

So, to remedy this, IrishMist and I will get on pole, our people will get Cali's peeps and MistressofGa's peeps to come to the show and pay us lots of money

Perk!

_____________________________

(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 3:59:01 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Then, we can have a major orgy with handpicked peeps. Jefff can be the evil emcee.

Helloooooooooo sister! Pick me pick me pick me!

Cali
(I'm pretty sure it's what I need)

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 4:00:45 PM

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Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Then, we can have a major orgy with handpicked peeps. Jefff can be the evil emcee.

Helloooooooooo sister! Pick me pick me pick me!

Cali
(I'm pretty sure it's what I need)

Well, fiddlefuck me...you were a given, I thought you knew that.

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 4:08:38 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

I just neeeed to hear it.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 4:10:59 PM

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Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

I just neeeed to hear it.

Cali

awwww.....does someone need a hug?

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 4:12:44 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

Just trying to keep with the "need" theme. But sure... bring your hot self over here and press it up against me.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/28/2008 6:24:29 PM

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Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Right. I am certainly NOT getting what I need. So, to remedy this, IrishMist and I will get on pole, our people will get Cali's peeps and MistressofGa's peeps to come to the show and pay us lots of money since I am out of work now.

Then, we can have a major orgy with handpicked peeps. Jefff can be the evil emcee.

'K?

Wellllllllllllllllllllll HOT DAYUM

LET'S GO

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/29/2008 4:59:04 AM

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Mmmmm a lot of polelocks hanging around here. Where are all of these poles at. The North pole or the South pole. Can I touch any of you with my 10 foot pole?

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/29/2008 9:47:24 AM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Mmmmm a lot of polelocks hanging around here. Where are all of these poles at. The North pole or the South pole. Can I touch any of you with my 10 foot pole?

Wow Ray... does that line ever work? What a smoooooooooth talker.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Dnomyar)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/29/2008 11:00:55 AM

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Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Cali you will have to ask the pole sitters. I have never had any line work. Thats why I keep writing lots of them

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 1/29/2008 3:08:22 PM

Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

I want him to bathe me, pamper me, and prepare me

Hmm, that's interesting, I want all that too.... and I'm a top.

As for what to do to make him "get it", he may or may not have it in him to "get it". If you were a malesub making this same post, you would have been railed left, right and center for being a "do me do me". From the sound of it, your partner may or may not be "somewhat Dominant" but rather, somewhat willing to top you from time to time. Does he enjoy topping you, or is he simply indulging you? Do you know what his feelings are on all of this? Are his needs being met?

I have a question for you that might give your situation more direction. What exactly is it that you need? Do you have a "need" to submit, or do you have an unfufilled desire to bottom? There is a difference.

Several years ago, when I was bright-eyed, naive and just a little ducky getting her feet wet, I thought that I might be submissive. I have since realized how hilariously wrong that was. :) After a rather disasterous adventure with an Alpha friend of mine, I had realized, no, nope, no way, I'm not submissively inclined, that's for sure! Over time I have come to realize that I'm overall more dominant than not, and I just happen to like to bottom, too. :)

Figure out just what it is that you want, and talk openly with your partner. Keep in mind that his needs are just as important as your own, and he may or may not enjoy the same things that you do, or in the same way, and he has a right to that. Try to be positive and bring up ideas and share fatansies equally, rather than demanding that you "need" this, that or the other specifically. Is he responsive, does he have an interest, or does he just indulge you to try to make you happy? What are some of his desires and fantasies? Are your desires compatible?

If what you "need" is rooted in the spirit behind certain activities, then address that specifically, rather than attributing it to specific activities. If what you want/need are specific things, then, well, you may need to compromise on some, or determine how compatible you really are overall.

IMO, YMMV and all other obligatory disclaimers.

_____________________________

I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to kitten4)

RE: Not getting what i need. - 2/6/2008 3:31:01 PM

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Joined: 2/5/2008
Status: offline

Kitten, I have a similar issue. This might help you - at first, I thought my situation was identical to yours. I found out later, by picking at it and picking at it, that my sweetie DID have dominant tendencies. He just didn't want to admit them to himself, because he thought that any relationship that involved any BDSM was inherently disrespectful to the submissive partner. He was raised in such a way that hitting a woman was unthinkable, and the idea of controlling any aspect of her life including her sexuality was just abhorrent to him. He had a hard time realizing that he DID want those things... we had a horrible fight about it, which was very hard for me, but in the end it helped him realize what he wanted. A lot of people say that certain people aren't "hardwired" for this sort of thing. But I think more often than not, our cultural indoctrination gets in our way. Is he generally a very nice man? Takes good care of you? If so, I bet you he's worried about hurting you, or worried about being a bad person, and that he's buried that worry very deep.

Good luck to you

Canntaireachd

(in reply to kitten4)

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