RE: BDSM SNOBS

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/27/2008 3:42:59 AM

Justme696

Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
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I see a circle.

We, some, threat newbies hard and harsh. They post a new thread where they say "Damn why are all Dom(mes) so hard and not willing to give us newbees a chance".
We answer...." ignore them, there are nice people here" "use the block list" .

And beeing a "snob" when it means "Secure" and "high self-esteem" is ok

< Message edited by Justme696 -- 1/27/2008 3:43:41 AM >

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/27/2008 5:59:20 AM

Evility

Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

It is also a way to teach them to fish rather than handing them fish. I much prefer this method of passing on information.

Knight's Kyra

You are actually pointing them to a book about fishing more than teaching them how to fish. "Go read this" is not teaching, especially if it is something like the now defunct Castle Realm site. Most people prefer this methodology because it involves no real effort on their part. I met my share of folks like that when I was starting out. One of them was my ex and it is the main reason of several reasons why she is now my ex.

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/28/2008 12:00:05 PM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
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Hey Damien meet pinochiole. Now is that a snob nose or what. Evility lets not diss fishing. I agree with you. If you cant put a pole in their hands then have them get off of their knees.

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/28/2008 12:32:51 PM

fetishnoob

Posts: 8
Joined: 5/23/2007
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intention counts for much, but friendship and guidence are not nessecarilly gentle things, for who among us has seen a friend doing something stupid and not walked over and smacked them in the back of the head and told them to stop being a dumbass. it is first nessecarey to realize and accept fault before progress can be made, therefore a sharp tongue is a usefull tool

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/28/2008 1:57:17 PM

ELUSIVE1

Posts: 536
Joined: 9/11/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: jimdandymagnum

But times have changed....someday you, and I will be facing new challenges in this world or another. That reasoning is like "I used to walk 5 miles to school in a snowstorm". If benevolence exists can we be it?

JdM

"~When I was a child I used to pray for a bicycle. I soon realized G~d doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness"

I think we have all 'walked a mile' in those "Newbie" shoes...and you are right, a little kindness never hurt...at least not in a good way <wink>

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/28/2008 2:04:19 PM

GlowingEye

Posts: 22
Joined: 9/20/2007
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I have little problem with people reacting negatively to stupidity and others being unwilling to take advice...

However, I recently had a run-in with the worst kind of snob on the other side. She first offered to recommend some contacts she knows in my area, but when I told her I was currently involved with someone from CM, she blasted me for being stupid and claimed he couldn't be "real" if he was under 40 and had to go online to find
someone.

I hate people like that.

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/28/2008 2:34:09 PM

ebonysweet

Posts: 8
Joined: 9/13/2007
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the first time i went to the BDSM chat room at literotica.com, the "regulars" treated me like crap for my ignorance and i wondered if all those in such a lifestyle were like that. i asked what i thought were realistic questions and sought sincere advice. the "God" in the room insulted me terribly one day and still being a new and completely unknowing submissive, my response was "Fuck You" and the hell i caught from that was amazing. i could not understand why someone who i had always shown respect to would treat me in such a fashion without any action on my part to cause it.

i found my One in that same room and he thought i was most attractive because i never treated other's badly and was always welcoming to someone new. he thought it was sexy that while other subs were afraid to stand up for themselves, i was willing to be "the bad one" to gain the respect due me as such.

"He who laughs last" would be the phrase i would use at this point. those same people cannot believe that my One moved me across two states with child in tow and into his house within 8 months because he thought i was amazing!! those same snobs could not believe i would go real time because of love...lol. those same snobs wanted invites to my yahoo 360 because my erotic poetry was being so talked about and gaining a fan club they were not welcome to be part of. those same snobs cannot believe i was able to catch and keep that handsome One as my own. those same snobs cannot believe the Dom's and Master's that own them are my very best friends.

i would not treat anyone so horribly as i was treated. i am proud to say that the Dom's and Master's that i have met have sent new subs and slaves to me just so they would have a warm welcome for their first forays into the lifestyle. i am still new and still learning about most things having to do with BDSM but treating someone with plain and simple kindness should not be that damn hard!!

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RE: BDSM SNOBS - 1/28/2008 2:45:06 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Evility

quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

It is also a way to teach them to fish rather than handing them fish. I much prefer this method of passing on information.

Knight's Kyra

You are actually pointing them to a book about fishing more than teaching them how to fish. "Go read this" is not teaching, especially if it is something like the now defunct Castle Realm site. Most people prefer this methodology because it involves no real effort on their part. I met my share of folks like that when I was starting out. One of them was my ex and it is the main reason of several reasons why she is now my ex.

Unless you can meet them in meatlife, suggesting a book may be the best one can honestly and realistically offer.

If you want hands on teaching, join a munch, a group, an organization and start meeting people you want to learn from and then approach them.

Worked for me.

Worked for the folks I have mentored and trained.

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