Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will.

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will.

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will.

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 12:52:08 PM

Posts: 57
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline

I am the happiest master alive. At least I believe so. Why do I say this? Simple. For almost a year that I have spent with my slavegirl I have managed to train her in the most fulfilling way possible. I guess that I have no need to mention that she is exactly what I wanted (looks and brains combined).

Her training consisted of several steps but I will focus on the orgasmic part of her training: Orgasms on command, multiple orgasms, orgasms with no physical contact, orgasms lasting for several minutes… et al.

During this training period I focused on her learning, setting aside my personal pleasure. This can be regarded as a small sacrifice that a master must endure. This sacrifice, in time, enabled me to get a far greater pleasure from my slave.

Now back to the topic of this post… sorry for this little ad

A few days ago I trained my slavegirl to willfully abstain from orgasms of any kind. Now this can sound cruel… but remarkably it isn’t.

During her earlier training, while she was instructed to orgasm on my demand, she felt guilt for experiencing such pleasures. After each session or even classic vanilla sex she felt the unbearable urge for more orgasms. This was tormenting her. This doesn’t sound so bad, but as time passed this helped me to quickly expand her boundaries and allow her to experience a new and higher form of pleasure.

This new form of pleasure consists in her full time devotion to my pleasure. This, in return, enabled her to fully enjoy sexual and BDSM activities without the torment of orgasm, without the need for release and in my opinion this is far better for her.

From my perspective, right now she is a far better slave, totally immersed in her role, always willing to please me in any way possible. In doing so, she experiences something that is far greater than any orgasm she ever had.

By the way, her next orgasm is scheduled for June the 17th.

Now my question: How many masters and slavegirls enjoy this kind of activity in their respective relationships over a long period of time?

< Message edited by Milivoje -- 2/4/2008 1:14:24 PM >

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 1:08:45 PM

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline

June 17th?

If this works for her and it makes you happy, I'm glad you found each other.

that would seem like an eternity to me. I'm all for a couple of days just before I see him as it has rewards, but June 17th?

_____________________________

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 1:34:06 PM

Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline

if thats what works for *both* of you ... more power to you

going without orgasms for extended periods are all well and good, orgasm control was something i experienced for a while and yes a large part of that was abstinence .. and yes it was enjoyable ... but i am talking a week to ten days

for *me* anything longer than that and i just lose the momentum to carry on, I would also question that if in order to get the best use of me I need to be divorced from my orgasm .. or that my pleasure in service is purely drawn from my orgasm ... whether the dynamic was suitable ...

this isn't for me .. and i would most likely withdraw from service if this was required of me ... but am glad it makes you both happy

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio

(in reply to OmegaG)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 1:38:48 PM

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

I love orgasm denial, especially if it's paired with teasing, touching, hinting that maybe this will be the day, getting juuuuusssssssst to that edge only to hear "Do not cum." It is one of the few touches of masochism I possess.

(in reply to softness)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 1:57:50 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

I cannot imagine pleasing someone else being far better than any orgasm I ever had. Hey, you asked. But as long as it works for you, knock yourself out.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to batshalom)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 1:58:15 PM

Posts: 57
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline

Dear softness,

First of all I would like to say that this is not orgasm control, as my slave willingly embraced her abstinence. My slavegirl experiences pleasure from sexual activities, but has no need to achieve orgasm.

From my personal opinion there are slaves who enjoy their selflessness and slaves who desire to get pleasure from their masters.

Both are Ok, but from my point of view a slavegirl who would “lose momentum” simply is not enjoying a certain activity for whatever reason.
From my personal point of view the two most likely reasons may be:

1) The slavegirl is not really willing to explore new ways of experiencing pleasure.
2) The slavegirl in reality is too dependent on her own pleasure (one might say selfish), which in return can harm the relationship with her master.

I would like to point out again that this is not denial in the usual way as my slavegirl experiences all the pleasures of various sexual activities paired with all the pleasures of giving me pleasure. All this without: the need for her to orgasm.

< Message edited by Milivoje -- 2/4/2008 2:23:54 PM >

(in reply to softness)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:02:23 PM

Posts: 99
Joined: 7/22/2006
Status: offline

june the 17th? thats ages away :| orgasm denial is great, but i can just about last a week and then im antsy and in need of release, if your both happy more power to you but thats so not for me :)

_____________________________

-Look, if you want to torture me, spank me, lick me, do it. But if this poetry shit continues just shoot me now please.-

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:04:07 PM

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

I don't. If I can control someone through sex, I loose respect for them and see them as weak.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:05:07 PM

Posts: 29
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

It's called Tantalism.

http://tantalism.org/

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:06:34 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

I would disagree with both of your points. You can subsist on stale crackers and water, for the most part, but is it pleasurable? No. Can I subsist on sex without orgasm? Yes. But lord have mercy, why would I want to give up something so pleasurable, so satisfying, so centering, so fantastic... for stale crackers and water?

Am I willing to explore new ways of pleasure? Sure. Doesn't mean I have to give up the other.

Am I too dependent on my own pleasure? Can't even begin to think of what in the hell that really means. I would think that HE would be dependent on my pleasure, because it sure makes me nicer/happier/more mellow/easier to get along with.

You asked what we thought... but now you're telling us our answers and our reasons are wrong??

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:06:55 PM

Posts: 57
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: quinnny

It's called Tantalism.

http://tantalism.org/

Nice find.

< Message edited by Milivoje -- 2/4/2008 2:09:54 PM >

(in reply to quinnny)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:23:20 PM

Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline

I actually enjoy sexual tension when aroused more than the release itself. Without any releases however I'd find my sexual interest and tension waning over the course of time. A few days, maybe a few weeks. In my case however I have noticed if I don't use it I lose it, meaning my libido.

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:27:17 PM

Posts: 57
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProlificNeeds
In my case however I have noticed if I don't use it I lose it, meaning my libido.

This is something that I am very aware of. I will not allow the "lose" bit

P.S. Having read some of the stories on tantalism.org ... I guess we (my slave and me) are not the only people who sem to enjoy this activiry.

< Message edited by Milivoje -- 2/4/2008 2:28:20 PM >

(in reply to ProlificNeeds)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:36:28 PM

Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Milivoje

Dear softness,

First of all I would like to say that this is not orgasm control, as my slave willingly embraced her abstinence. She is not having orgasms, if you told her to have one, I am sure she would obey ... thus you are controling her orgasms .. all orgasm control requires the consent and obediecne of the submissive involved My slavegirl experiences pleasure from sexual activities, but has no need to achieve orgasm. Most slaves do, this is nothing special, and the majority of slaves do this without being denied orgasms for extreme lengths of time.

From my personal opinion there are slaves who enjoy their selflessness and slaves who desire to get pleasure from their masters.and there are those who are both, the two statements are not mutually exclusive

Both are Ok, but from my point of view a slavegirl who would “lose momentum” simply is not enjoying a certain activity for whatever reason. Two possible reasons may be:

1) The slavegirl is not really willing to explore new ways of experiencing pleasure.losing momentum means something does not remain the priority, after a period of time without an orgasm the subject becomes neutral and so loses its power, it is no longer potent because it is no longer an issue ... this has nothing to do with unwillingness to experience new things ... i like experiencing new cuisine but i dont continue to eat a dish that does nothing for me ... especially if that dish is gruel (the culinary equivolent of extended orgasm denial)
2) The slavegirl in reality is too dependent on her own pleasure (one might say selfish), which in return can harm the relationship with her master. Too dependent on my own pleasure ... show me a "true" act of altruism and i you show you where the selfish pleasure lies... slaves do what they do because it pleases them, at some basic and core level they do it because they want to, yes individual acts may be unpleasant but the whole experience of slavery is one that pleases them whether it be (like me) because you can become utterly devoted to another persons pleasure, or because you revel in the pain and humilaition of being another persons fuck hole ... i am still being utterly selfish .. the bi product of that selfishness is a happy and useful slave. As to wanting an orgasm and so being focussed on my own pleasure ... i can still be a perfectly pleasing slave and be granted orgasms ... if he isn't bothered about me having one with him ... fine .. am mroe than able to sort myself out away from him .. but what man would not want to share than one moment when body is really not my own to control, when it is totally focussed on feeling and nothing more

I would like to point out again that this is not denial in the usual way as my slavegirl experiences all the pleasures of various sexual activities paired with all the pleasures of giving me pleasure. All this without: the need for her to orgasm. if she isn't ahving an orgasm then she is being denied them ... whether by herself, a wish to please you, or by your direct order she is being denied them.

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:51:11 PM

whiteslavebitch

Posts: 479
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline

It seems to please MasterK to give me orgasms when he wants me to have them. Other times when we're together he chooses not to. Yesterday, he made me ask permission to cum (something entirely new for us).

He does not need to withhold orgasms to keep me immersed in my slavery. I always have his pleasure/serving him at the forefront of my thoughts and actions.

But as others have said, if it works for you both.....

_____________________________

MasterK's whiteslavebitch

formally collared 1/30/09

"I give to you my everything, you've given me these loving wings." - DMB

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 2:59:56 PM

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Milivoje

Now my question: How many masters and slavegirls enjoy this kind of activity in their respective relationships over a long period of time?

Since I'm all but incapable of giving myself orgasm and must rely on my partner for them anyway, I have no interest whatsoever in someone holding orgasms over my head as a way of control or training.

Orgasms are good for the body, give your heart a workout, the sweat clears out your skin and it helps me with my mild depression as it releases "feel good" chemicals. Withholding them from me would not make me serve better nor increase my devotation. It makes me cranky, tense, and miserable. However, that he does provide them and we bond together in the aftermath does increase my devotation to him. If I were denied that for the length of time you are talking about, it would be a severe punishment.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 2/4/2008 3:01:53 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 4:37:24 PM

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

So glad this came up... I was denied for just a few days and found myself miserable! sobbing in the shower! and then after getting permission, it was like I was me again. I couldn't do it for a long time... But if you all are happy, yay you....

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 4:42:04 PM

Posts: 732
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Milivoje <snipped>

Now my question: How many masters and slavegirls enjoy this kind of activity in their respective relationships over a long period of time?

Easy to answer in one simple word.....NOT.
But thank you for asking.

_____________________________

There is no such thing as can't unless it is followed by yet

It is the meaningless little acts that become meaningful in the doing.

The people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind.

(in reply to Milivoje)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 5:23:04 PM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Sorry, I must not be 'true'.
I read something once, I'm paraphrasing so forgive my inelegant language;
'A master does not have to do things his slave enjoys, but, a master who too long denies his slave often finds himself without a slave'.
I'm just sayin'...

~Christina

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to littlebitxxx)

RE: Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will. - 2/4/2008 5:27:23 PM

Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline

i couldn't do that, i like a few others would feel like i was being punished. orgasms are more than just a physical response to stimuli, they are just as much, if not more of an emotional response...at least for me.

edited to add, that i don't understand why a dominant would want to withhold pleasure from someone they love...i don't claim to understand a lot of things and this is one of them.

< Message edited by christine1 -- 2/4/2008 5:28:15 PM >

_____________________________

i am woman! er, godzilla! hear me roar!

http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=2856&sound=/sounds/movies/godzilla/roar.mp3

He's the "boom" overwhelming...

He is my Master, my lover, my best friend my everything.

(in reply to littlebitxxx)

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Slavegirl’s orgasmic abstinence by free will.

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.080