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RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 6:58:08 AM   
bleusparkles


Posts: 168
Joined: 2/11/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

ORIGINAL: bislavegirl4434

Breatheasome, Bound2one... please.. breathe... inhale.. exhale! inhale! exhale!

16 is the legal age, yes.

He works with juniors, so 9-12 year olds.

Yes, at first it disturbed me alot. I didn't think it could work, etc. But now its just normal, much ilke hiding some of the kinkier parts of the lifestyle.

Look....I breathe just fine.....but there is NO WAY in hell I would EVER be ok with a man of 30 something being with a child of 15.....and its NOT like just hiding a kink or two.....you both are lying about something very fundamental to a person....their age....



That bothered me too but I was too busy hyperventilating to mention it.


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Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:03:23 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		one of the reasons older men are attracted to younger women is because they have failed with women of their own age.

they see your youth as inexperience and hope that you will be easily molded in to the perfect image of what a partner looks like to them.

they also know they can play power games that look like: you give up your friends for me but i dont have to give up mine for you

and they know that you likely wont hold them accountable, because you dont know what to look for yet.

but one thing you do have and do know is your intuition, it rarely steers us wrong, yours is screaming hey this makes no sense!...this is not fair!...i am confused!....

and i would think that until you hear something that makes sense and is fair from him, and see it in his actions, you should pull away and watch him from afar.

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(in reply to bislavegirl4434)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:08:41 AM   
TotalState


Posts: 278
Joined: 9/3/2007
Status: offline 		It's not so much the age difference, but your extreme young age when you met that is bothering me.  Definite red flags, and signs of him having no restraint or ethics whatsoever.  

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Spanking with a smile, living with feeling.

(in reply to bislavegirl4434)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:09:42 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bislavegirl4434

*raises eyebrow* Did i not mention that at the beginning? oops. Yes, he's a fair bit older than me...


I had to go back and double check your OP before responding. You have had a relationship with this Teacher for 2 years online. If you are 18 now and he is 37 he was 35 and you 16 when this all started.  He is continueing to recieve Text, calls and Pictures from Former subs, his boss, etc. and you are not seeing any Red Flags?

I know I am going to regret asking this but how do you know other than by his words that all of the women contacting him are Ex's and not current UM's he is reeling in? That the period he is spending in his "studio" is in actually writing a book and not chatting with another 16 year old? I note that you are in the UK, and according to Age Link you were not of legal age when he contacted you in New Zealand.

I know everyone is saying talk to him, its a trust issue, but i am beginnign to suspect there is reason for there to be a trust issue and part of that starts with a track record of "online training" of a 16 year old.

poenkitten (finding something not sitting right here, but not sure what it is yet)
sigh..typos

< Message edited by BlackPhx -- 2/21/2008 7:10:32 AM >

(in reply to bislavegirl4434)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:12:30 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Call me a cynic.  But as someone else has said the situation doesn't feel right - but frankly - the whole post doesn't feel right.  Everyone seems to be coming down on this 'Master' - but there are many things that make me question the poster.
 
So, I am from the UK.  Your profile mentions that you have moved from NZ to UK.  I have no idea about laws in NZ, but UK, 16 is legal age.  With all honesty, the age doesn't phase me at all.  Your new and recent profile also indicates that your Master is perfect, yet you are explaining his 'faults' here? - I also have to ask how did you get a visa to live in the UK at your age?  Your post states he is a teacher and comes home at 4pm.  Another post you indicate he will be 'home in a few minutes'.  It's wasn't even 3pm when you posted that.  Most schools finish between 3.15 and 3.30pm.  Even if he lived around the corner from the school, I fail to see how he could arrive home so fast.  Teachers also rarely get home every evening at 4pm - I was teaching support and a school governor.
 
Yeah, call me a cynic... but an awful lot doesn't add up.  As for the original question - communicate with him - you should not have given yourself over as much in the first place without negociating such before hand - but it isn't too late if you keep a level head.  But something about the whole thread/situation doesn;t add up to me.
 
the.dark.

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to bleusparkles)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:12:54 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

I note that you are in the UK, and according to Age Link you were not of legal age when he contacted you in New Zealand.

poekitten..... I'm glad you did that.


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(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:16:35 AM   
TotalState


Posts: 278
Joined: 9/3/2007
Status: offline 		And she met him when she was 15.  He didn't "reveal himself" as a dominant until she was 16.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

I have no idea about laws in NZ, but UK, 16 is legal age.


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Spanking with a smile, living with feeling.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:16:57 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bislavegirl4434

Breatheasome, Bound2one... please.. breathe... inhale.. exhale! inhale! exhale!

16 is the legal age, yes.

He works with juniors, so 9-12 year olds.

Yes, at first it disturbed me alot. I didn't think it coud work, etc. But now its just normal, much ilke hiding some of the kinkier parts of the lifestyle.


Much as I hate to correct you..18 is the legal age in New Zealand (where you are from according to your profile) and 18 in the UK, except Scotland where it is 16. 16 is the minimum  where an 18 year old will not get into trouble for sexual relations. Not where a Teacher or anyone over the age of 18 is free and clear to play.

poenkitten

(in reply to bislavegirl4434)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:20:51 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TotalState

And she met him when she was 15.  He didn't "reveal himself" as a dominant until she was 16.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

I have no idea about laws in NZ, but UK, 16 is legal age.



Their relationship as she indicated he revealed his dominant nature is 16.  They are together now and she is 18.  I just checked NZ law and 16 is legal age.  So technically, he hasn't done anything illegal.  You can talk as much as you like to anyone of any age, but sexual relationship is illegal.  That has not been indicated.
 
I still smell bullshit of the poster, more than the man.  Too many inconsistancies so unless the poster comes back and answers those, I don't believe this is a real post.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to TotalState)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:21:22 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline 		Welcome to the club Dark...too many "also, ands, corrects and collides" for this to be sitting right with me on either side. As a legitimate post, or as a bait post something is just off.

My skin is crawling and when it does that I tend to listen to it...  somethings very wrong here.

poenkitten

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:22:20 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Poen, you are misinformed (sorry to contridict ya - just trying to keep things right).
In the UK, 16 is legal age for hetrosexual sex.  As for NZ, I just checked and it is 16 - but I will keep checking to see if I am wrong on that count.
 
the.dark.

< Message edited by Darcyandthedark -- 2/21/2008 7:23:30 AM >

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:26:27 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackPhx

quote:

ORIGINAL: bislavegirl4434

Breatheasome, Bound2one... please.. breathe... inhale.. exhale! inhale! exhale!

16 is the legal age, yes.

He works with juniors, so 9-12 year olds.

Yes, at first it disturbed me alot. I didn't think it coud work, etc. But now its just normal, much ilke hiding some of the kinkier parts of the lifestyle.


Much as I hate to correct you..18 is the legal age in New Zealand (where you are from according to your profile) and 18 in the UK, except Scotland where it is 16. 16 is the minimum  where an 18 year old will not get into trouble for sexual relations. Not where a Teacher or anyone over the age of 18 is free and clear to play.

poenkitten



16 is the legal age for sexual relationships in the uk, 18 for D/s though the laws regarding D/s are hazy and many clubs etc require people to be over 21.


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There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:28:16 AM   
Bound2One


Posts: 614
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bislavegirl4434

Breatheasome, Bound2one... please.. breathe... inhale.. exhale! inhale! exhale!

16 is the legal age, yes.

He works with juniors, so 9-12 year olds.

Yes, at first it disturbed me alot. I didn't think it coud work, etc. But now its just normal, much ilke hiding some of the kinkier parts of the lifestyle.


Wow.  OK.   I breathe just fine.  Something tells me you're going to have a lot of life lessons learned in the next year or so.  I wish you well.

(in reply to bislavegirl4434)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:29:08 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackPhx

Welcome to the club Dark...too many "also, ands, corrects and collides" for this to be sitting right with me on either side. As a legitimate post, or as a bait post something is just off.

poenkitten


Bait post sounds about right.
I just checked the NZ Crimes act 1961 part 7 -  16 and above is legal - although, depending on emails, the 'adult' could be considered a 'groomer'.
 
the.dark.

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:29:10 AM   
silvermuse


Posts: 259
Joined: 6/8/2007
Status: offline 		16 is the legal age for sex in the UK.. however ANY sexual contact with a person one minute under the age of 16 via the net or otherwise is illegal.

18 is the legal age to be married, or emigrate without parental consent in the UK.

Sorry peonkitten, but the age thing in the UK I do know very well.

Now one thing I am not sure of is if the kink/same sex law in the UK has changed or not. It used to be that any same sex relationship for the UK could not take place until you were 18 and kink/bdsm fell into the same law.

As a parent the entire idea that a teacher could/would approach a UM with the aim of becoming sexually involved - well the reaction isn't a pretty one. Not only is there the issue of him being one who can't be trusted around UM's, but there's an entire abuse of power/breach of trust issue there as well.

silvermuse


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There is darkness and there is evil, never mistake the two.

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:34:35 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Much of the over 21 rules for clubs in the UK is more to do with alcohol laws than sex or BDSM, coloredin, and also more to bring everyone in line with homosexual laws also - nothing to do with legalities of sex.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to colouredin)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:40:55 AM   
silvermuse


Posts: 259
Joined: 6/8/2007
Status: offline 		Erm, the laws on alcahol in the UK are not 21, but 18. There are over 21 clubs, but the legal age to go into a bar, or nightclub in the UK and buy your own booze is 18. (16 for cider or used to be, and can be bought shandy - that contains alcahol- at 16, or wine with a meal at a licensed restaurant)

silvermuse



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There is darkness and there is evil, never mistake the two.

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:42:51 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Much of the over 21 rules for clubs in the UK is more to do with alcohol laws than sex or BDSM, coloredin, and also more to bring everyone in line with homosexual laws also - nothing to do with legalities of sex.
 
the.dark.


I didnt know the reasons i was just stating what I knew, didnt know it was alcohol though i do know the challange 21 thingy but its legal to go to a liscenced place and purchase alcohol when you are 18, I do know there was talk of modifying some age limits within the last year, ta for the insight though :D

With regards to teachers it is rather worrying that one would get involved with someone so young tbh and I know that teachers have pretty strict rules when it comes to that and risk loosing their jobs, however if you are 18 now legality isnt really an issue any more more morality. I personally would seriously question it, age is a life long debate and many people have varying opinions on it. I think anyone of his age to be talking to one so young is a bit worrying regardless of D/s etc etc But then I also know that age is relative. I guess its not really up to anyone on here to judge your relationship. Thats for you to justify to yourself. I would suggest that maybe you are a bit young and havent really developed the self confidence you need. But regardless of my opinions you really do need to talk to him about all this.


< Message edited by colouredin -- 2/21/2008 7:43:42 AM >

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:44:39 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Taking this at face value (since it's well known I could care less that someone is a teen or young teen when getting into all this) I think the real issue here is that you were surprised at how open and eagerly he enjoys continued sexual correspondence with ex's.  The surprise is the thing- because now you aren't sure what other surprises may be around or exactly how far this will go.

If you were in an open relationship, it really wouldn't be surprising at all.  But if it is supposed to be an exclusive relationship, I can understand the confusion- it can be awfully misleading to let women continue to beg and try to do stuff again, especially if you're going to have regular daily contact with them. 

So, talk to your dom and explain how the surprise effected you, ask point blank exactly how exclusive sexually you are together, ask exactly why he has chosen to continue to encourage the behavior, ask exactly what they have been told about his relationship now.

This is not to challenge him or give you ammunition- this is basic information gathering so you can know the field you're dealing with. 

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(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Master's 'old' girls... help?! - 2/21/2008 7:47:38 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		If you note, I never stated the legal age of alcohol consumption was 21.  Clubs keep to over 21 to cover themselves - if you are assumed to be possibly under 21, all off sales are advised to ask for ID.  So to cease relentlessly asking people for ID every time, clubs go for the easy option and make themselves over 21.  And this is not only BDSM clubs, but the majority of most club culture.
18 is legal drinking age.  16 and 17 with the licencees permission whilst consuming a meal - this includes wine, beer or cider.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to silvermuse)
Profile   Post #: 60
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