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RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 6:53:11 PM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Dear Kalista;

go to Louisville with Christin and Sundowner and get the video that xxblushesxx promised you and promptly forgot about. (or at least contact her and give her your address so she can send you the dvd.) (it's an exercise vid you pervs)
Oh, and erm...give someone a blowjob

therealcalinonathatfakeassshit

< Message edited by xxblushesxx -- 3/10/2008 7:16:34 PM >

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to Kalista07)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:16:22 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner
I'm British and rather shy. A lady friend has offered to give me a blowjob. I am already in fulltime employment and do not wish to take up another job. However I do not wish to offend her. What should I do.

Dear Overworked:

First, you can only count on the real Cali, accept no substitutes.

Second, the term "blowjob" is a euphemism. There is no blowing, and it is not a job. More appropriately, it should be called a SuckPrivilege.

Now drop your pants and receive what is rightfully yours.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Sundowner)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:20:25 PM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: JustAVixen

Ahhh, my apologies. I did not realize I was stepping on toes.

You weren't. I forgot the little smiley. Having a column thrust upon you can be a challenge. Now if you were on your knees giving someone a blowjob, you wouldn't have the opportunity to step on anybody's body parts. Assume the position.

Cali

Hmm, thrusting.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:21:45 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy
I'm a huge fan of anal, but I have to admit that my personal hygiene is lacking...Are there any long term potential problems with leaving a sub's doo-doo on the Domidong?

I would have had her blow me to remove the her dung...But I fell asleep...Unfortunately when I woke up in the morning she was dead.

Since we can safely guess that the domidong must pee on a regular basis, any foreign matter blocking its entrance will be expelled. As far as any material remaining on the outside of the domidong, the skin of the domidong is the same as any other relatively non-porous skin on the outside of your body, so you're safe there. Okay, well it's not exactly the same, it is more silky, and more soft, and more smooth, and more responsive and more... mmmm... yes, did I mention silky... and hot... and mmmmm dayummm fine, and uh.... I'm sorry, did you ask me a question?

Next time try not to fuck the life out of her, it completely removes any possibility of repeat action, and it kinda ruins your street cred. I'm just sayin.'

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to domiguy)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:26:31 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kalista07

blah blah blah blah blah

Oh yes!!!! This is killing me since we do NOT have sex! i really like Him, but damn a girls got needs ya know??!!

Girlfriend, if he won't put out on the first date throw him back, he's not a keeper. Uhhh, I mean, you DID give him a blowjob first, right? And then he still wouldn't put out? WTF is it with these guys, don't they know they OWE you? After all, you shaved your legs and everything (you DID shave, right?). The very LEAST he could do is let you blow him.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Kalista07)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:30:24 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

You weren't. I forgot the little smiley. Having a column thrust upon you can be a

Hmm, thrusting.

Level, please keep up or get off the bus. We were thrusting back on page four. I think you even lost your place in line and missed your blowjob.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Level)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:39:53 PM

Posts: 4240
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline

Cali,
i think as his punishment for not keeping up You should have me blow level....... dayum..That sounded trashy didn't it...Hmmm... Screw it!! i'm kinda proud of myself... tee hee heee

Just sayin'
Kali

_____________________________

“Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”
~~Sweedish Proverb

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:50:58 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kalista07

i think as his punishment for not keeping up You should have me blow level.

Not only should you do it, but you should have done it before now. Why are you talking? Your mouth should be full. Get on it.

Cali

< Message edited by CalifChick -- 3/10/2008 7:51:28 PM >

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to Kalista07)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:52:22 PM

Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline

Dear Cali,

Is there any problem for which a blowjob is not the solution?

Cheers,

DC

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:52:51 PM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

*thinks both of you should get to work*

Ah, my kingdom for a moonlit night, and a hottub.....

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:54:09 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

Is there any problem for which a blowjob is not the solution?

I'm thinking "nope". I'm sure there would be a lot less war if the guys were more occupied getting blowjobs.

Cali
(now accepting tokens of appreciation from men everywhere for the increase in the number of blowjobs they are probably getting.)

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to dcnovice)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 7:59:42 PM

Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline

Cali,

Tonight is one of those horrific nights apart from Master. How can I give Him a blowjob?

- Lonely, empty-mouthed sub

_____________________________

Property of Cuffkinks

Member:
The Pimpettes
MoGa's IN-Crowd

"You're the gleam in my eye, the smile on my face and the bulge in my pants" - Cuffkinks

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:00:52 PM

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hejira92

Tonight is one of those horrific nights apart from Master. How can I give Him a blowjob?

Don't come whining to Cali when he chooses to be apart from you. Use your time constructively to practice your blowjob skills.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to hejira92)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:03:19 PM

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hejira92

Cali,

Tonight is one of those horrific nights apart from Master. How can I give Him a blowjob?

- Lonely, empty-mouthed sub

I'm only about a half hour south of you.. Come over and we can practice our blow job skills together...

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to hejira92)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:05:18 PM

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

Dear Cali...

My blowjob skills are already amazing, but I have heard guys talking about 'gumming'..should I get my teeth taken out?

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:07:22 PM

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner
I'm British and rather shy. A lady friend has offered to give me a blowjob. I am already in fulltime employment and do not wish to take up another job. However I do not wish to offend her. What should I do.

Dear Overworked:

First, you can only count on the real Cali, accept no substitutes.

Second, the term "blowjob" is a euphemism. There is no blowing, and it is not a job. More appropriately, it should be called a SuckPrivilege.

Now drop your pants and receive what is rightfully yours.

Cali

Dear Cali.
What about those blowjobs in which your mouth is simply opened as wide as it can go, your tongue is sticking out but there is no actual sucking going on? You are just gettng throat fucked?

< Message edited by BossyShoeBitch -- 3/10/2008 8:16:36 PM >

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:08:31 PM

Posts: 4240
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline

mear ali,
sjklkh ehyou meohw thenakdl soihngdf!!
shanky doodly do.

* edited to state i can indeed spell, however, i have proven that not only is it not polite to talk with Your mouth full, it's just downright rude.*

_____________________________

“Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”
~~Sweedish Proverb

(in reply to CalifChick)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:12:43 PM

Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

I'm only about a half hour south of you.. Come over and we can practice our blow job skills together...

(With apologies to Cali)

*BSB- Sent you note on other side*

And for all you perverts- no, the note is NOT about blowjobs. (But I was never one to rule out any possibilities......)

_____________________________

Property of Cuffkinks

Member:
The Pimpettes
MoGa's IN-Crowd

"You're the gleam in my eye, the smile on my face and the bulge in my pants" - Cuffkinks

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:15:39 PM

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Dear Cali...

My blowjob skills are already amazing, but I have heard guys talking about 'gumming'..should I get my teeth taken out?

Dear Cali,
I was thinking about having my tonsils removed too.. Do you think this would make it easier to deep throat?

< Message edited by BossyShoeBitch -- 3/10/2008 8:18:33 PM >

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: DEAR CALI - 3/10/2008 8:18:48 PM

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Dear Cali...

My blowjob skills are already amazing, but I have heard guys talking about 'gumming'..should I get my teeth taken out?

yeah, i was thinking about having my tonsils removed too..

Mine were removed years ago... Hmm..wonder if that really makes a difference? OK, BSB... time for research..before and after

< Message edited by GreedyTop -- 3/10/2008 8:19:13 PM >

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)

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