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Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:18:56 PM   
BIllCT


Posts: 160
Joined: 9/14/2004
Status: offline 		Is Love needed between a Dom and a submissive in order for a submissive to serve the dom?
 
And do all submissives, expect the dom, they are serving, to love Them? Or is caring and respect enough for the submissive to be happy with the relationship and to serve?
 
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:35:43 PM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		http://www.collarchat.com/searchpro.asp?phrase=love&author=&forumid=ALL&topicreply=both&message=body&timeframe=%3E&timefilter=0&language=single&top=300&criteria=AND&minRank=0&sortMethod=r&submitbutton=+OK+

and people think I'm an attention whore.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to BIllCT)
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RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:35:44 PM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		Love is required for me to be able to serve him and I would only serve someone in a long term relationship if I felt loved back. It is how I am personally wired.

But these are relationships just like all other types and they include a lot of couples in loveless relationships that range from miserable to very happy in them. Everyone’s needs, desires and drives are different. The key is finding someone compatible and this includes love.


_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to BIllCT)
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RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:39:36 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BIllCT

Is Love needed between a Dom and a submissive in order for a submissive to serve the dom?
 
And do all submissives, expect the dom, they are serving, to love Them? Or is caring and respect enough for the submissive to be happy with the relationship and to serve?
 


Some need love, some don't. No, not 'all' submissives expect the dom they are serving to love them. Caring and respect are enough for some submissives to be happy with the relationship and to serve.

Love vs D/s

What's love got to do with it?

Male Dominants: Love & Romance

Am I allowed to love my Master?

Falling in love with your Master

Not allowed to love Master

Love the Master

Relationships, BDSM, Love & Boundaries

Serve & love

Love within authority dynamics

Why Masters do not fall in love

When love gets in the way

More what's love got to do with it

Why do submissives fall in love with their doms

And yet more what's love got to do with it


_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to BIllCT)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:42:07 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Bill.

I think at this point someone should point out the Search Function just click here and before you ask another question see if it has been asked before.

This one has been asked at least 6 times since Last Thursday.

It is always better to Expand on an existing Thread than start a new one. Many people get tired of typing out the same responce over and over and over and over and over and over again.

Steel

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Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to toservez)
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RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:47:59 PM   
LadyPaige


Posts: 187
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Some submissives are just happy to find a compatiple Dom to serve.  That's not a put down, it's just recognition that it can be a lonely frustrating world out there when you have been fruitlessly looking for that special someone.  At some point, respect and compatibility are enough... at least for now.  Others can't settle for anything less than love because being in a loveless relationship feels emptier than being alone.  Everyone is different and it goes for Dom, sub, or vanilla.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:52:48 PM   
MontrealPhoenix


Posts: 1526
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

Bill.

I think at this point someone should point out the Search Function just click here and before you ask another question see if it has been asked before.

This one has been asked at least 6 times since Last Thursday.

It is always better to Expand on an existing Thread than start a new one. Many people get tired of typing out the same responce over and over and over and over and over and over again.

Steel

God Steel, i could just kiss you for this! OP i think it's time to think before posting something. I realise that it's easier to just post a question but as Steel has pointed out, there IS a search button which is great to find what you're looking for...
 
Phoenix

_____________________________

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor ..pg 75

"He who ties a woman owns her"
~Guardsman Of Gor pg 267



(in reply to SteelofUtah)
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RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 12:55:06 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

Is Love needed between a Dom and a submissive in order for a submissive to serve the dom?


Of course it's not needed.  Many people serve before they are in love.  Some serve long after love has faded.  Some fall in love immediately and serve.  Some aren't in it for love.  It's as individual as people are.  But common sense should tell you that.


_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to BIllCT)
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RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:02:02 PM   
verysweet


Posts: 128
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BIllCT

Is Love needed between a Dom and a submissive in order for a submissive to serve the dom?
 
And do all submissives, expect the dom, they are serving, to love Them? Or is caring and respect enough for the submissive to be happy with the relationship and to serve?
 


I would venture a guess and say there are even some who don't need any of these things.





_____________________________

Poetry in devotion.

(in reply to BIllCT)
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RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:18:05 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to verysweet)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:21:30 PM   
verysweet


Posts: 128
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx




C:

What is that emoticon?  I've misplaced my glasses!!!  Looks like a tag team.

< Message edited by verysweet -- 4/3/2008 1:22:01 PM >

_____________________________

Poetry in devotion.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:22:14 PM   
kittinSol


Posts: 16926
Status: offline 		It's a bunch of freaks wanking over a donkey.


< Message edited by kittinSol -- 4/3/2008 1:26:55 PM >

_____________________________



(in reply to verysweet)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:43:21 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		It's beating a dead horse. *lol*

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to kittinSol)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:47:35 PM   
kittinSol


Posts: 16926
Status: offline 		Dangit, you ruined it  .

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(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 1:53:50 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OmegaG

and people think I'm an attention whore.

yer no attention whore, Omega ...not today  *hugs*


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...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to OmegaG)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 2:29:52 PM   
KyttynTheMynx


Posts: 4880
Joined: 5/10/2006
From: Moosecrotch, Va
Status: offline 		Bill, heres MY personal take on it.  It would be GREAT to find a Dom to love, and be loved in return.  Should that not happen, I would hope that he would have no issues with me finding the emotional fulfillment that I crave in other venues.

IMO


_____________________________

Hibbie's Hottie

The next time you think I give a fuck, remember the 3 F's... Unless you are Feeding me, Financing me, or Fucking me, I don't give a fuck!!

"Kyttyn: The Other White Meat!" - DRH

10 Miles of Hot Chocolate Lovin'.

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 2:31:23 PM   
verysweet


Posts: 128
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

Dangit, you ruined it  .


Perish the thought.  

_____________________________

Poetry in devotion.

(in reply to kittinSol)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 2:56:47 PM   
metalmiss


Posts: 341
Joined: 5/4/2005
From: Croydon, UK
Status: offline 		Being as i am allergic to the "L" word anyway, i have to say i define it differently.

i have been lucky (and occasionally unlucky) enough to serve several Dom's during my few years experience. All that was between us for that to happen was mutual respect, understanding & desire.
However, it is different with my Master.. We have these things in abundance, but i also care for Him very deeply, which to me is an important distinction. But i do not consider myself to "love" Him due to my personal beliefs with the word itself.

So i would say.. No, i don't need to love to serve. No, i don't hold love as a condition of my serving a Dom. And finally.. Within a relationship, caring, respect & trust is all i require.


_____________________________

"The longing to serve, to submit, to abandon oneself sexually, emotionally, and physically makes one a slave either to a Man, a Woman or to God. Submission to that passion is divine degradation." - Dorothy C. Hayden

Owned by RavenMuse

(in reply to BIllCT)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 4:13:25 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Depends on the people involved. He needs me to love him and I need him to love me. Lots of other people are fine if one person is in love and not the other, or neither.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to metalmiss)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Question 3 - 4/3/2008 7:16:29 PM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

Bill.

I think at this point someone should point out the Search Function just click here and before you ask another question see if it has been asked before.

This one has been asked at least 6 times since Last Thursday.


Steel


Thankyou Steel If it is advice Bill is looking for, i hope he will take your suggestion. However, i feel it is attention he is looking for because he has asked basically the same questions 6 months ago and did not seem to take the advice then.
 
Bill...really! while you certainly have the right to ask any of these questions, i would encourage you to take a moment to consider the type impression they are giving of you. They exude lack of experience and desperateness along with a whiney repetiveness. If i was seeking, i would not feel any confidence in your abilities as a dominant based on these questions...

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 20
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