Leonidas
Posts: 2078
Joined: 2/16/2004 Status: offline
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It's not possible to submit in a satisfactory way except in the face of what you percieve to be dominant behavior in someone else. Without that stimulus, you are just playing a head game with yourself. By definition you, the submissive, cannot overcome your own resistance to full submission. That's the dominant's job. It's impossible to say where the desire to submit comes from, or why some folks find it so satisfactory to do so. It could well be that those who exhibited a submissive response in the presence of dominant behavior had a survival advantage during the eons of fighting, raiding and slave taking that make up the vast majority of our history as a species. The need to submit to dominance could be a socio-biological leftover of a more savage time, but nobody knows for sure. If you are finding that it's difficult to submit, you may not be perceiving genuine dominance in your partner, and so need to test the strength of the mental and emotional bonds in which you find yourself before you, as you say, let go. Be kind to yourself, honest about what you feel, and willing to let that struggle play out. You already know what the payoff is, since you described it in your post. Take care of yourself, Leonidas.
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