SocialPerversion
Posts: 28
Joined: 3/21/2008
From: Northern Nevada
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quote:
ORIGINAL: chickpea
Not sure why you quoted me or assumed my stance on the matter, I was just pointing out the logical stances that could be taken by both sides… at no time did I state my personal stance on the matter… but I will clearly state my stance on it for you…
I do see submission as a gift and on a personal level could care less about those who get upset about the topic… if the choices I have made in my life and in my relationship are enough to get them upset and drive them to distraction then that is purely their issue and not mine. Why someone would allow the choices other people make to upset them is beyond me. I tend to take the stance that it’s my life to live, not theirs.
As someone who has been involved in a successful, real life, same house, long term D/s relationship I find those who take issue with the “submission is a gift” topic to either have an over inflated sense of entitlement or have no real understanding of the concept of choice and how it applies to their lives and relationship.
I was explaining to someone recently who had referenced it as “slave worship” that if their view of the world is so narrow that other peoples choices are beyond her comprehensions then the issue is hers to deal with and not everyone else’s.
Let’s not forget that this is a bottom issue as well as a top issue. I have seen many a bottom make fanciful and romantic quotes about “my submission is not given, its taken” and “even when I don’t want to submit he makes me” which is nothing other then trying to romanticize their relationship via Norman quotes… if truly they are forced to submit without their consent then the police should be called.
Unless there is a threat of death to the bottom if s/he does not do as the top instructs then the situation is built entirely out of trust and CHOICE. If there is the threat of death then the situation is no longer consensual and should be dissolved as soon as the poor sub can get to a phone to have the police called in on the “master”… preferably with tasers and Billy clubs involved… and orifice searches by a cop who for some unknown reason goes by the name Bear or Tiny.
I have to laugh at the sub/slaves who say “My Master is a real Master, he forces my submission” because it’s a bunch of fanciful and romantic crap… unless you are risking death when your master tells you to do something then you are making a choice, you either do it, don’t do it and take the punishment or walk the hell out of the relationship. Let’s accept what the relationship is, a series of choices.
Contracts and power of attorney transfers won’t hold up in court if “mister mighty master” decides he wants to chop off “Master_Mighty’s_Slave_Girls” left ear because she wasn’t listening, they are just another tool to establish the power exchange in the relationships and are as empty legally as the collar the subs wear.
That seems to be the stance I have seen, those who see submission as a gift and that their lifestyles are filled with choices no matter how “true” of a slave they are, and those who build their relationship off of a series of choice which they then hide behind terms such as “real master”, “real slave” and “real submissive”.
I for one would never take a “real” or “no limit” slave into my household, I would be so wrapped up in trying to show them where their limits are that it would become an obsession... better to take someone who understands that our lives and lifestyles, no matter how “real” or “deep”, are just a series of choices on both sides.
Which brings me to my next question, if you make a “deep real no-limit life salve” use her safe word do you get a cookie? Personally I want someone grounded in reality rather than floating around in Gor headspace or in the Arthurian era of the Beauty books.
Please understand that I am not attacking those who are Gorean, I have read the books and feel that they are a great example of how honor, trust and responsibility should be brought back into our lives despite the fact that we live in a corrupt world filled with fakes, phonies and liars. My issue is with those who are so wrapped up in the fantasy of Gor that they believe that their slave can not make the choice to leave and if she tries the master can track her down and kill/lash/hobble her. Accept that it’s a fantasy series and that at no time in the future will you track down a lost freewoman, brand her and introduce her to her slavery by tying her across your latest bosk kill and raping her.
To each their own and may you find what makes you happy. For me reality and the gift of my subs submission makes me happy. Whine and complain about how I live MY life all you want, while you do that I will be living happily.
Last time we tried the fantasy stuff the damn dice kept getting lost, those 1d100 are like marbles… they just keep rolling. I still don’t know if I successfully completed my “level 12 spell of virginal ass raping” before she completed her “summon level 40 female rights lawyer”… And now in “Advanced BDSM 4th edition” they nerf’d the “True Dom” class at level 12… bastards!
~~conquer4love~~
< Message edited by SocialPerversion -- 6/29/2008 8:28:13 PM >
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RE: "Gift" of submission? - 
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