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New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 4:50:13 PM

Posts: 14
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: florida
Status: offline

First off i would like to say hello to everyone for i am new to this site and the lfe style.

Bakc to business, I am new to the life style and would like to become a master/dom. I need the low down of what is expected from a master and from a dom and how do i go about it.
I know there is no specific way to do any of this, besides what the people make of it.

If anyone would like to help me out i would really be greatful for the advice.

Thank you,
aFreak

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 4:55:31 PM

Posts: 175
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline

hello Sir .... have You tried the various informational websites to learn from ? like castlerealm? just a thought. and welcome. =)

_____________________________

~love a Man in control~

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 5:03:56 PM

Posts: 14
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: florida
Status: offline

No i have not been on that site before. this is really the first site i have been on any site like this. I will look into the site that you have given to me.

Thank you,
aFreak

< Message edited by aFreak -- 12/3/2005 5:08:08 PM >

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 5:11:50 PM

Posts: 6
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

First thing is I would change the name. Would a true submissive want to please someone who thinks being a Dom is being a Freak? What does that make her for submitting to you?

Then, if you are serious, go to http://groups.msn.com/TheGoldenShackles/lifestyleslinks.msnw
It is a list of quite a few sites on a site called Golden Shackles. I used the site 3 years ago when I first entered the realm.

or
http://myweb.tiscali.co.uk/englishroissy/info.htm which has several links to choose from.

Just a place to start, but personally I would be reticent to trust someone A Freak enough to train you.

Sirr Burd

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 5:28:01 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirBurd

First thing is I would change the name. Would a true submissive want to please someone who thinks being a Dom is being a Freak? What does that make her for submitting to you?

I dunno, I find the name appealing. It's the kind of name that would draw me in. I rather like quirky names, as I've had good luck with them in the past.

Personally, I'd advise the OP to get invovled in his local community. While that wasn't the route I chose, it seems, overall to be the best bet for newbies.

Welcome and good luck!

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to SirBurd)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 5:33:32 PM

Posts: 14
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: florida
Status: offline

Sirburd, I understand were you are coming from on the name but that is what i have named myself in many differant parts of my life. I am a Freak by many peoples standards, but maybe not by the poeple in my new life style that i have. Just to let you know that its just something that i have pick out of the blue, i have FREAK on my truck in two places. One 3' x 1' and the other 1' x 6". Its not just a name its me.

She would be a slave or a sub not a freak. My name shouldn't be taken out of context and converted into someones elses profile.

Thank you for the sites that you have listed i will give them a look through to see which ones meet my best interest.

Thank you,
aFreak

(in reply to SirBurd)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 5:38:28 PM

Posts: 14
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: florida
Status: offline

Perverseangelic,
thank you for you suport on the name. I did not classify anyone in the comunity as what my name implies but myself.

Thank you for your show of interest and i will be looking into my local people a little more.

Thanks,
aFreak

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 6:00:08 PM

Posts: 396
Joined: 9/10/2005
Status: offline

quote:

have You tried the various informational websites to learn from ? like castlerealm?

ok back up a few..

WHAT do you want to be.. Rather what ARE you? You can't learn HOW to be a Master or a dom.
you CAN learn to educate and tune whats there. But this is in your blood or not..

Before anyone can guide you.. There needs be more information about that

What do you want from the lifestyle?
what do you want in a slave/sub
what do you want/expect from a Ds relationship?

I'd suggest before going to fantasyrealm.. Do some reading HERE.. It may give you an idea as to who you ARE and who you want to become.

< Message edited by Webmaster60 -- 12/3/2005 6:01:42 PM >

_____________________________

Master Michael
~~~~~~~~~~
"To sin in silence when he should
speak makes cowards of men"

(in reply to Dracironsgirl)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 6:14:14 PM

Posts: 14
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: florida
Status: offline

Just for a quick glimps of what i want and am/like.

I want the control of a slave, to have and to be obayed by my every will and at the same time have the slave be able to be in bondage, be whipped, spanked ect. Maybe that is all the same with a slave.

I will and am looking into the site "castlerealm".
When i truly find out the differance i will let you know what it is that i looking for, but for know it's a slave that i want that likes the dom factor added into slavery.

< Message edited by aFreak -- 12/3/2005 6:24:41 PM >

(in reply to Webmaster60)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 6:34:20 PM

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aFreak

Perverseangelic,
thank you for you suport on the name. I did not classify anyone in the comunity as what my name implies but myself.

Thank you for your show of interest and i will be looking into my local people a little more.

Thanks,
aFreak

A good source for finding local groups is www.darkheart.com/usalist.html

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 6:39:38 PM

Posts: 14
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: florida
Status: offline

JohnWarren,
Thank you, i can use all the info that i can get. Please keep me posted on any info that you might think that is/would be helpful to me.

_____________________________

Thanks,
aFreak

(in reply to JohnWarren)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 10:06:37 PM

Posts: 27
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline

I also suggest Castlerealm which covers most areas of the lifestyle. I would also suggest just reading the forums in collarme. Theres always a varied amount of information and its a good way to see the different angles people take for the same issues.

** and Welcome to collarme Sir.**

Bratt

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/3/2005 11:34:57 PM

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aFreak

Just for a quick glimps of what i want and am/like.

I want the control of a slave, to have and to be obayed by my every will and at the same time have the slave be able to be in bondage, be whipped, spanked ect. Maybe that is all the same with a slave.

I will and am looking into the site "castlerealm".
When i truly find out the differance i will let you know what it is that i looking for, but for know it's a slave that i want that likes the dom factor added into slavery.

Don't forget to research what it is a sub/slave wants and needs in return. They're really not looking to be treated as some drunken, abusive arsehole might treat his battered wife!

D/s or M/s is a dynamic where our unique gifts compliment the other's needs and desires. ie We each have what the other wants. I'm saying this because so far I've yet to be convinced you're not just some young nilla fella looking for a never-say-no fuck toy to use and abuse at your leisure. And that's *NOT* what a sub/slave is, anyway! Owning a slave also gets you obligations and responsibilities in return - nuthin' is free or easy!

For now, I'm happy to give you the benefit of my doubts and suggest you follow the advice and links posted etc. And I wish you luck.

Focus.

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 3:22:01 AM

Posts: 10
Joined: 11/26/2005
Status: offline

I think you've hit the nail on the head here. He seems to not have read these forums at all, or he'd already know half of the things he's asked after. The info on here only is invaluable to any new Dom. I think I lucked out and had the perfect sub fall right in my lap after about 3 months of researching, she's now under consideration.

(in reply to Focus50)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 5:54:08 AM

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline

i just get the warm fuzzies when Masters remember we are actually human....

can he deal w/ the obligation and responsibility.....many can't.????? its a shame.

they think that all they have to do is enslave them and that is good enough,
but bonding w/ them is a good thing.

makes it much easier to obey and continue to want to please.

surprised to see Masters speaking of castle realm....time for more java on that one

good luck in your journey

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: aFreak

Just for a quick glimps of what i want and am/like.

I want the control of a slave, to have and to be obayed by my every will and at the same time have the slave be able to be in bondage, be whipped, spanked ect. Maybe that is all the same with a slave.

I will and am looking into the site "castlerealm".
When i truly find out the differance i will let you know what it is that i looking for, but for know it's a slave that i want that likes the dom factor added into slavery.

Don't forget to research what it is a sub/slave wants and needs in return. They're really not looking to be treated as some drunken, abusive arsehole might treat his battered wife!

D/s or M/s is a dynamic where our unique gifts compliment the other's needs and desires. ie We each have what the other wants. I'm saying this because so far I've yet to be convinced you're not just some young nilla fella looking for a never-say-no fuck toy to use and abuse at your leisure. And that's *NOT* what a sub/slave is, anyway! Owning a slave also gets you obligations and responsibilities in return - nuthin' is free or easy!

For now, I'm happy to give you the benefit of my doubts and suggest you follow the advice and links posted etc. And I wish you luck.

Focus.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to Focus50)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 6:47:16 AM

Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirBurd

First thing is I would change the name.

Hey...I'm with you on the name, Burd.

The connotation isn't that great, IMO, and in spite of it being a part of how you might identify yourself, aFreak, it came imply so many things.

I was recently contacted by a man that has something along the lines of "Big Dick" in his SN. (Don't want to give the full handle here.) So I have to decide, by his choice of identifying names....is he a huge asshole, or well hung. Either way, it's not my primary interest.

Others seem to be offering the more helpful advice, so I'll refrain from repeating it again.

Enjoy your journey.

K

(in reply to SirBurd)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 7:16:40 AM

Posts: 158
Joined: 11/5/2005
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

I have my thoughts on a submissive/slave on paper if you'd like to read.

Master Ken

_____________________________

I'm not where I need to be, but I'm better than I was yesterday.

Namaste, I honor the divine in you

(in reply to aFreak)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 7:45:13 AM

Posts: 58
Joined: 11/10/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Don't forget to research what it is a sub/slave wants and needs in return. They're really not looking to be treated as some drunken, abusive arsehole might treat his battered wife!

Thank You Focus....i get so many emails asking how i will serve a Dom/Master yet they fail to mention what they may offer to the sub. And truthfully, i can't answer in which way i would serve a Dom until i meet the right one. oh i can give generalized ideas but sometimes i feel like i am being interviewed for a job instead of trying to get to know someone so that some type of rapport can be established. maybe i am different (well i know i am) but to serve someone, i must also love them. i don't want to serve "just to serve".

(in reply to fyreredsub)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 10:07:36 AM

Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirBurd

First thing is I would change the name. Would a true submissive want to please someone who thinks being a Dom is being a Freak? What does that make her for submitting to you?

Then, if you are serious, go to http://groups.msn.com/TheGoldenShackles/lifestyleslinks.msnw
It is a list of quite a few sites on a site called Golden Shackles. I used the site 3 years ago when I first entered the realm.

or
http://myweb.tiscali.co.uk/englishroissy/info.htm which has several links to choose from.

Just a place to start, but personally I would be reticent to trust someone A Freak enough to train you.

Sirr Burd

quote:

ORIGINAL: FTopinMichigan

Hey...I'm with you on the name, Burd.

The connotation isn't that great, IMO, and in spite of it being a part of how you might identify yourself, aFreak, it came imply so many things.

I was recently contacted by a man that has something along the lines of "Big Dick" in his SN. (Don't want to give the full handle here.) So I have to decide, by his choice of identifying names....is he a huge asshole, or well hung. Either way, it's not my primary interest.

Others seem to be offering the more helpful advice, so I'll refrain from repeating it again.

Enjoy your journey.

K

I say he is already showing his dominance by not listening to either of you and standing by his name. He should not pick a name because it'll attract a "true" submissive but because it reflects his innerself. If you judge a person by their screen name and not the content of what they write to you then you yourself are showing a shallow, condensending side of your person.

As for the op itself, here is my advice:
Watch EVERYONE. Go out into your r/t community and watch the Dominants there. Ask them questions and listen to their answers. Also talk/listen to the submissives about what submission means to them. Go to the informational websites and read, read, read and then find the books on BDSM and read some more. From all this information, gleen what you identify as part of your core values and add them to your daily life. Always remember that the information you get is by no means a ridged context to live your life. Only you can determine how your life is lived. You must always be willing to learn more and to grow.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)

RE: New master needs to learn - 12/4/2005 11:09:08 AM

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

JohnWarren,
Thank you, i can use all the info that i can get. Please keep me posted on any info that you might think that is/would be helpful to me.

Would suggest amazon and looking at any of the very informative books under John's name.

(in reply to aFreak)

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