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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:18:45 PM   
PeonForHer


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Oh Sambamanslilgirl, I didn't mean it like that.  It was a joke.  I meant that by not accepting being called "Ma'am", you weren't accepting your place - which is above a sub, above me. 

Anything like "my dear" sounds like something said between equals, whereas a Domme is superior to me, so it'd be hard for me to say that.  But if it works for you and your man, that's fine.  It'd be fine for me too, if that's what my Domme liked.  No offence intended.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:26:17 PM   
PeonForHer


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Did you get that it was a joke, Venatrix? 

Well, anyway, I guess I'll probably have to tread more carefully here than I thought . . .

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:31:53 PM   
Politesub53


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i always use Ma`am out of politeness and respect. i can understand the age thing but it always amuses me, why would a submissive male insult a woman by using the word Ma`am. It isn`t something i can see anyone doing intentionally. Unless or until i am told otherwise, i will still use Ma`am.

Surely the pronunciation used in the UK is "Marm" and not "Mum" Thats unless one is into baby play

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:34:42 PM   
Politesub53


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

I grew up in London. 


So did i Ma`am, i knew You were classy


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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:34:50 PM   
madamekitty


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Actually, I prefer to be called Ma'am. It's a respect issue.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:42:14 PM   
Venatrix


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Did you get that it was a joke, Venatrix? 

Well, anyway, I guess I'll probably have to tread more carefully here than I thought . . .


I did, indeed, get that it was a joke.  I would have ridden to your defense, but I was distracted by whipping your back.  It all comes down to the old saying about the US and England being the only two countries divided by a common language.  That's why I tell people I am tri-lingual:  I speak English, American, and French.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:43:54 PM   
Venatrix


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

Surely the pronunciation used in the UK is "Marm" and not "Mum" Thats unless one is into baby play


Sounds like you're addressing her like a school marm.  Oh, wait.  That could be a good thing.  Where did I put my ruler?

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:48:43 PM   
Politesub53


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Two plus two equals seven....... ( Passes ruler with a smirk )

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:49:12 PM   
Venatrix


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

I grew up in London. 


So did i Ma`am, i knew You were classy



You know, you're quite devious.  You pay me a compliment and make yourself look good at the same time.  Very clever.




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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 3:53:11 PM   
Politesub53


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Devious...... Moi ?  i prefer cute.... Lol

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 4:29:53 PM   
Usako


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I HATE Ma'am. I am not old and to me, Ma'am is used for older women. I am only 23 and in no way a Ma'am. If someone has to call me something Miss works just fine. Ma'am is a very polite term but some of us don't like it. And that's in an everyday setting.

In this lil BDSM world I make it quite clear in my profile what I want to be referred to if the lil sub boys have to use some sort of title. Any e-mail saying Ma'am gets deleted or a snappy remark. I also dislike the term "goddess" since, FYI, I'm not some divine creature. Princess, Miss or Mistress works. I guess that whole "My Lady" think works too. Anything but Ma'am or some sort of goddess reference.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 4:42:43 PM   
Dilseachd


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Ive never had an issue with Southern Dommes not wanting to be called Ma'am.  I do prefer to address a Lady as Madam when I am playing with them or in a bdsm setting.  My last Mistress prefered either Ma'am or Madam...one of her other boys called her Ma'am..me Madam..and she was content with both.

I cant take too many who call themselves Goddess seriously for some reason...just one of my quirks I suppose.

Regards to all,
Dils

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 5:11:45 PM   
MizSexyVixen


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Goddess, in the right context, can be quite hot. As an everyday honorific, no!

Princess just calls up the wrong connotations for me. In any case, if I were royalty, I would be Queen.



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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 5:14:05 PM   
MissSCD


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I am from the deep south.  I have said that word since I was a child.   The rule of thumb with titles is to answer in which you are instructed.
 
Regards, MissSCD
 
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

OK, about time for this week's sap question from me.

That word "Ma'am" doesn't work for American women, does it?  Especially not in the southern states, from what I can make out.  I like "Madam" - but in the UK it seems most women (vanilla or otherwise) can't stand it.  Too many memories of frosty shop assistants.  We all know that "mistress" has the more common connotation of "an adulterous woman; a woman who has an ongoing extramarital sexual relationship with a man" (WordWeb)  It works for lots of Dommes, from what I can see, but it doesn't work as well as, maybe "My Lady" does for me.

These words mean different things in different cultures, even though those cultures may have a common language.  So which words press the right buttons?  Which, if heard (or if you say, to the right person) really send a thrill through the body?  It would be interesting to canvass opinions here at Cme - populated as it is so clearly is by people from all over the world.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 5:28:18 PM   
lunadancer


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greetings: as a child of the south, using the word M'am in any form was a term of respect for adult women, as was sir for adult men, we were taught as children to use it.  i know it isn't used as much in many areas as it once was, but for some it is a habit that is hard to break.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 5:55:50 PM   
thishereboi


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I use Ma'am all the time in lifestyle and vanilla situations. It's a form of respect to women and the way I was raised.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 7:33:24 PM   
BlackSakura


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I prefer "ma'am" as well.  I simply cannot stand when a sub calls me "miss".  It comes across as rude and lazy.  In high school, all the asshole students would refer to female teachers as "hey, miss! blah blah..."  They didn't have enough respect to call them by their full name.

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 7:47:16 PM   
PeonForHer


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The rule of thumb with titles is to answer in which you are instructed.

That . . . . hit the spot.  Thank you for putting me in my place, MissSCD.  (And no irony meant from me whatsoever.)


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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 11:11:44 PM   
Coupleofwhats


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I don't like "Ma'am"... but I'm a Yankee who associates it with old Southern relatives. I might be into it in 30 years.

I like "Miss." Or "Mistress."
I like being called a princess, but NOT "Princess."

I also respond well to "Ow."

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RE: "Ma'am" - 10/9/2008 11:21:50 PM   
zakkan


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I never liked using "Ma'am" or "Sir". It makes me feel like I'm back in the army. And I HATE the army...

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