Collarchat.com

Join Our Community		 Collarchat.com

Home  Login  Search 

RE: feminization


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: feminization Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: feminization - 10/19/2008 8:47:29 PM   
PanthersMom


Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline 		count me in with the "no thanks" crowd.
PM

_____________________________

That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!




(in reply to ericpup)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: feminization - 10/19/2008 9:42:40 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		So I think it is all about how you approach it in your life and your submission.  If you have the desire for crossdressing or feminization, make it part of who you are, be proud of it, integrate it into your life and your submission as a whole.  The problem comes when the desire becomes an absolute - a fetish - and it becomes all about the male sub and the dressing.  This is going to generate a very negative response in most dominant people - not necessarily because of what it is, but because it is clearly in imbalance.

But there are dominant women out there who are in to it.  I found one, so can you.   

Make it -part- of your submission, not all of it.  Bring it in balance and harmony with who you are on the inside and the outside and put that out to the universe.  No guarantees, a lot are not interested as has been stated before...but it can happen.


_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to rdilgart)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: feminization - 10/20/2008 3:11:29 AM   
iwearpanties


Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline 		Mistress Lotus

i never said too have a female put on a beard or such i was refferring too wearing male clothes .  iI do a agree not all Mistress'es / Dommes are into make or haveing a male crossdress i also dont think makeing a male croosdress is in no way mocking or trying to put down women . with that i mean the over size boobs and heavy make up that is way over doing it as i see .as for wearing panties and being told to buy them sure that can play with the male ego and i think it should shwoing him and bringging down a noch or two out of the macho thing LOL. but ive also know makeing the sub male wear them infortn of other Males dose a simular task . but like some one wrote here  we all have are likes and dislikes so we should realy knock each . but as many times as i have seen crossdressing / feminization come up it alwasy seems too be one subject that gets putt down . i mean no disrespect to any one nor trying too start any figths just how i see it as a long time sub .

(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: feminization - 10/20/2008 4:57:55 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Shawn1066

If my Owner and I ever get a crossdressing houseboy, he will have to endure evil forced masculinization training.

DV's Fox



ROTFLMAO!  Yay Fox! 

I agree.  I try not to 'down' people because their kinks are different from mine... but I don't want them in my service.  I don't want a female sub.  Why would I want a male dressed as a female?  I have several female impersonator friends.  When dressed as females, I treat them like any of my other girl friends and call them by their female names & pronouns.  They seem to have a great deal of fun being able to step across the gender lines.  I like them quite a bit.  I just don't find them sexually appealing.


_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: feminization - 10/20/2008 8:25:03 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		The way I see things is that the ones ruining it are the ones asking for forced femenization.  You just asked, it is no longer forced. Sorry.  When the Dominant is the one who desires the femenization, or the crossdressing (I'll assume the difference you imply is the level of involvement) then it is one thing. The problem is that it usually has nothing to do with the dominants likes or dislikes, but it is strictly a kink to make the sub happy. It can add to, which is lovely, or it can overwhem all other aspects of their attempted service in which case it is no longer a useful thing.

In response to Lotus, You find femenized gay male slaves, just like my masulinized lesbian. Not sure what that point would be, just mentioning, since I have known them. They are dressing as the opposite of their straight Dominant's prefrences... I dont know what it gets them or why theyd enjoy it, but I have seen it. Personally, I am bi, so I can find someone attractive as a girl or boy so its all asthetic to me.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to MsStarlett)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 12:42:43 PM   
straponfantasy


Posts: 3
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline 		MistresseLotus, I read your Journal, and I've got to say, I think there is some psychology behind it you may have not considered... or maybe you have.  I don't know you personally and can't really say one way or the other.  However, I will expand on what I've noticed through self-reflection.

What turns me on is when a Woman questions my Masculinity.  Through that "switch" being turned, if you will, it may take several different forms.  For me, I don't want to be fully feminized, but if a chick coerces me into where feminine clothing and does something like take me with her strap-on after telling me to drop my panties to prove how much of a sissy I am, it has nothing to do with Women getting paid 70% of what men do in the workplace.  Also, I'm not middle aged; I'm in my mid-20's.  It's not that I get off on being dressed like a woman as much as it is my Domme damaging my sense of Manhood (temporarily of course).  Then again, maybe true feminization is a step past what I'm into...

(in reply to MistresseLotus)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 12:51:32 PM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
Status: offline 		Your comments imply, however, that masculinity is somehow better than femininity.  It's that concept that the majority of dominant women object to. 

(in reply to straponfantasy)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 2:15:17 PM   
LadyEllen


Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: straponfantasy

What turns me on is when a Woman questions my Masculinity.  Through that "switch" being turned, if you will, it may take several different forms.  For me, I don't want to be fully feminized, but if a chick coerces me into where feminine clothing and does something like take me with her strap-on after telling me to drop my panties to prove how much of a sissy I am, it has nothing to do with Women getting paid 70% of what men do in the workplace.  Also, I'm not middle aged; I'm in my mid-20's.  It's not that I get off on being dressed like a woman as much as it is my Domme damaging my sense of Manhood (temporarily of course).  Then again, maybe true feminization is a step past what I'm into...



Indeed - much of it in this context is a displaced castration scenario which relies on the identification of the male with his penis and the traditional social relationship of male and female. Feminization castrates him - "removes" his penis - and with it his male identity and sense of social superiority.

That it relies on the whole traditional notion of male superiority is where the problems start.

E

_____________________________

In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to straponfantasy)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 2:25:44 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		I agree.  That concept that making men put on panties and behave feminine and accept punishment is somehow humiliating and demeaning is right at the core of the issue.  The message that many women get is that being female is thereby something lower and less worthy.  The sad thing is that for many men, this "force me" behavior is simply a coping mechanism to make it "all right" to be and feel a little soft and feminine, and for many to also express bisexual behaviors that they feel.

My advice is to own it - if you want to wear panties, then wear them and don't make it a punishment or humiliation play to make it "okay" for you to be so.  If you want to suck a cock, or take a strapon or live cock, then get down on your knees and enjoy it and own that you want it and enjoy it.

My 2c...


_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 2:33:31 PM   
LadyEllen


Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline 		To an extent I'd agree that the "forced" thing is an attempt to make it acceptable to the male - but I also think it is essential to the whole castration element of this that it is the female that castrates him rather than himself.

In taking his penis in this way, she is taking possession of him in his mind.

E

_____________________________

In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 2:58:48 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I had a submissive that used women for his pleasure whether it was dominant women or vanilla, his focus was on pleasing himself.  They were not people to him, but tools.  After seeing that he had this attitude and in the course of changing things, once I understood what he was doing and it was a pattern, I dressed him up... oh yes I did.  He did not get what he wanted out of the deal, that is for sure.  Although his mind quickly went to... oh yes... mistress is letting me dress the way I want to sometimes... that is as far as that went.

I then treated him like males often treat women, by using him, showing him how it felt to be treated as nothing more than a play toy and not the kind of play toy he wanted to be.  This took a bit of time and wasn't just one night.  He had a new way of looking at things by the time I was done with him.

I do not play along with a fetish that is self focused to the point that I cannot be seen.  We should both be seen, but when one is not... and I am expected to be a play toy for a fetish... I walk.  It doesn't happen often because I can see it in most, but some have gotten real good at their game.  This is why I do not top or take on a submissive and play too quickly or that often.

I am typically not interested in cross dressing or feminizing someone.  They either are or they aren't and if I were into females, I would go for the real deal.  I have found a few who like silky things and such that were not offensive or self consumed and that I could hang with, but it wasn't as sexual thing and it wasn't done for me, but anything else... no thank you.

(in reply to LadyEllen)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 3:54:06 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		There are a lot of men out there who experience some sort of gender dysphoria and our society in most places is still structured such that a man acting female or feminine is seriously looked down on and can face verbal abuse and even physical assault. 

Regardless of why we are "this way", I find it sad that so many will never find loving acceptance of gender desires in a partner.  Because of the pressures of society, most men hide it and it grows into obsession and fetish fed to often by ill conceived fantasy and unrealistic expectations.  I really do believe the best and only course of action we have is to bring the desire to be feminized or be feminine into a place of balance within ourselves and make it an "attractive difference" - understanding that there will always be those who just aren't into it.

I have been extremely lucky to find two women who were/are into it, and it has been 15 years between the two.  In between I have had to do a lot of work to come to a place where I can be who I am without reproach within myself, or much care for what society may think of my choices.  I began yesterday in jeans and a sweatshirt fixing toilets, moving furniture, and cleaning out a garage, and ended it in a strapy beaded mini-dress giving a manicure to my Lady before giving myself over to Her play.  It is beyond wonderful and I count myself beyond fortunate to have this bounty in my life. 


_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 4:02:09 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		While I am not into this, I see no reason for anyone one being abused or discriminated against.  That is something I find very sad and offensive.  I have friends who are or are into many things that get them judged and mistreated and it makes me feel rather sadistic in feeling protective for them.  Everyone deserves to be loved and I hope they all get that love, but whether we can be in love with someone or not, they don't deserve our abuse.

(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 4:05:11 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		Lockit, just being clear that I in no way thought your post implied discrimination, abuse or assault on anyone, nor even negative implications.  I hit the reply button as yours was the last post and I had more thoughts was all.  

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 4:08:30 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Your comments imply, however, that masculinity is somehow better than femininity.  It's that concept that the majority of dominant women object to. 


Sometimes i know when to hush Ma`am.

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 4:19:24 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

Lockit, just being clear that I in no way thought your post implied discrimination, abuse or assault on anyone, nor even negative implications.  I hit the reply button as yours was the last post and I had more thoughts was all.  


lol I didn't for a moment think that Otter... I just found once again, something you said moving enough to want to comment on it!  (smile) It's all good! lol

(in reply to OttersSwim)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 4:37:45 PM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		For me it would depend on the person and how he responded to it. If he was obsessed with it as a fetish and it was primarily for his enjoyment, I wouldn't like it. If I could make him blush and squirm it would be fun.

(in reply to ericpup)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 4:50:20 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Your comments imply, however, that masculinity is somehow better than femininity. It's that concept that the majority of dominant women object to.


Exactly, and the same can be said from I guess many in the transgendered community. But then again many of us do genuinely suffer due to some guys thinking that this is all about kink and femininity is something to be messed about with just to relieve the urges of the mighty phallus.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 5:42:41 PM   
Venatrix


Posts: 2238
Joined: 11/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Your comments imply, however, that masculinity is somehow better than femininity.  It's that concept that the majority of dominant women object to. 


Sometimes i know when to hush Ma`am.


You're always a good boy, aren't you?  Never uttering a wrong word . . . .

(in reply to Politesub53)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: feminization - 10/21/2008 6:09:59 PM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline 		There is another assumption here that is so basic to most people's thinking many can't even get it when it is pointed out.  That being the assumption that there are only two genders and they are very clearly defined.  The belief that everyone is either completely male or completely female.  Beside the obvious transgender indiviguals that are many people who have both male and female traits in different proportions. 

I have also questioned people who claim they believe in female superiority and also feel that feminizing a man is a form of humiliation.  If females are superior, shouldn't making a man feminine be making him more powerful? 


_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: feminization Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2024
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.141