CallaFirestormBW
Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
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One thing that I've found makes a -huge- difference in the capacity to serve with grace is the ability to live in the moment. Everyone makes mistakes. You made a mistake in the past, but the past is gone. Now it is today, and each day is a new opportunity to be the person that you want to be.
As a keeper, I screw up regularly. My mouth typically gets me in trouble, because I am -extremely- verbal. Sometimes, I just say too damned much. Do I kick myself over it? Yeah, in the moment I kinda do... but once that moment is over, the only thing I retain is the lesson (and some lessons take more repetition than others. *grins*). I try not to make the same mistakes over and over again, but I don't beat myself up if I screw up on something more than once...
As a keeper, I'm also responsible for meting out discipline for the servant(s). Yes, sometimes they screw up. Sometimes it is big things, sometimes small. Sometimes, the problem is big enough that we have to hold a conclave to determine suitable management and deal with the impact to the House... sometimes its small, and one of the trainers takes over dealing with the issue -- but in any case, once the chain-of-command has dealt with the problem, as long as the servant accepts responsibility and completes the disciplines to deal with whatever happened, it's over.
I think, as a culture, we tend to cling to our guilt. We claim victimhood for ourselves, and beat ourselves up over things that are long gone. This philosophy is promoted in many religions, and is raised to an art form in a number of sub-cultures. It is not, however, terribly productive. Think about what you are supposed to be to your keeper -- you are to be a source of joy, a well-trained, graceful, and happily serving individual... if you are steeped in guilt, it is likely that you are unhappy more than joyful, hesitant in your execution of new skills rather than exhuberant in your training, and inclined to carry yourself with shame rather than grace -- and it leaves you less than happy in your service, because your mind is not on this moment's service, but on your past errors. In letting go, you free yourself to be the servant that you wish to be, and offer him the servant that he claimed you to be.
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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"
"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer
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RE: Can someone explain the difference between Submissi... - 
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