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RE: Daddy? - 9/24/2004 3:09:19 AM   
NightmareBeauty


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Being of the younger gender, I admit to looking for that "father" figure. My own Father passed away when I was young and so not having Him there, I missed the discipline, as well as the love and care of a Father. Not saying my mother didn't show that love and care, but she wasn't very strict with me. Having a father figure to take care of me, teach me how to be more a lady is probably just a need to fill that void that i lost when i lost my Father. Just my opinion.

(in reply to katydyd)
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RE: Daddy? - 9/24/2004 6:33:45 AM   
afmvdp


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That tends to be a common theme with many. Not always, but quite often. Just speaking from my own personal experiences.

(in reply to NightmareBeauty)
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RE: Daddy? - 9/24/2004 6:40:24 AM   
MrThorns


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Yeah...not always. My slave is 13 years older than I am, but I'm still Daddy....go figure. Maybe its just that she looks so damned good in that catholic school girl outfit...

~Thorns

_____________________________

~"Do you know what the chain of command is? Its the chain I beat ya with when ya don't follow my command."

"My inner child is a mean little fucker"

(in reply to afmvdp)
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RE: Daddy? - 9/24/2004 9:14:43 AM   
Suleiman


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Hmmmmm... out here where I am, "Daddy" and "Boy" have always been pretty common in the gay leather scene. Maybe it's just a San Francisco thing.

~S

_____________________________

Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

(in reply to Leonidas)
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RE: Daddy? - 9/24/2004 10:10:51 AM   
afmvdp


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Thorns I wasn't refering as much to age as just the overall mentality. I have former children who are nearly twice my age.

Suleiman No, it's not just San Fran. Like many things in the BDSM community it's just been expanded upon and brought into the wider range. Same idea, just different sexuality. Though in early cases it almost always referenced age play or financial caretakers.

< Message edited by afmvdp -- 9/24/2004 10:11:22 AM >

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RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 3:33:44 AM   
lil1v


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I just had to group some of my favorite comments about this subject in one post. For a long time, I thought "daddydoms" were some kind of sicko dad pedophiles. When I finally did some research on it, I found that that type of Dom was exactly what I was looking for. The type of structure of the D/s relationship without the biases that the "titles" bring to it. Nice to see others on the same page, or at least with understanding.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MR Thorns

I slide into Daddy-mode pretty easily. I am less sadistic (If you can actually believe that) and lean towards a very protective and very focused personality. It's a different headspace from "Master-mode".

I think Master can be pretty intimidating to the little girls. Daddy may be strict, but there is still a very comforting feeling about the structure involved. I think it comes from a huge feeling of trust. KNOWING that everything is going to be okay...knowing that Daddy is there and will take care of you. It's cozy. At least, thats the environment I try to establish as Daddy.


Totally agree with that sentence.. "I think Master can be pretty intimidating to the little girls".. at least the "typical" Master-doms. Reading some of the profiles alone on here, makes me want to find the nearest hole and hide and never come out.

quote:

ORIGINAL: wyldhearted

It allows me a deeper sense of being valued and cherished. It washes over me a more secure and gentler form of Dominance than other sorts that I have experienced in the past.

The Daddy Dominant that I have experienced as well as many others that I have spoken to both on the submissive side of things as well as from the Dominant side, seems to be a lighter version than the typical Dominant. More understanding, most certainly just as strict and stern...yet handling things in a much different way.

A wonderful website that expresses all of what I am trying to and am failing at can be found at www.subspace.cc/daddydoms.htm


Love the phrasing.. "a lighter version than the typical Dominant".. Ahh.. you don't know how healing it is to find others who get it. *bounces around the room with exhuberance* And yes.. "most certainly just as strict and stern"

quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

I'd say daddy/daughter or daddy/little girl relationships are the 2nd most common in bdsm type situations. It's very very common, many subs enjoy being protected, they enjoy giving up adult responsibilities, they enjoy having someone else to take care of things, and being a "little girl with a daddy" allows them to do all of that in a very direct way. Many doms enjoy the nurturing aspect as well.

For some people it can be a role play/occasional thing, for some it's a natural dynamic and for some it's a total living situation, in which the sub ALWAYS is the little girl.


Protecting and nurturing are great descriptors. The best part for me.. "for some it's a natural dynamic".. I'm not into roleplay or age play. I'm just me, and this is my natural state of being.

Sometimes you wonder if you're nutz. Sometimes you know you are. Sometimes its just nice to realize you're not all alone in it.

_____________________________

V



(in reply to wyldhearted)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 5:02:20 AM   
Masterspetal


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The only time my Master is called "Daddy" is when i am speaking to Him in front of our child, or to our child about Him. Other times it is Master, Sir, his real name (depending on circumstances), or He Who Must Be Obeyed! Neither of us are into Age Play, for a couple of reasons. 1. It does not interest us in the least, and 2. When our titles of "Daddy" and "Mommy" are used, it is in a parental sense, thus making it extremely odd to even use in our personal adult lives.

There have been many great comments on this in this thread though, and has been a very interesting read, and enlightening one as well.

(in reply to GreyDragon1952)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 8:04:05 AM   
junecleaver


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I never really had a father and I could be comfortable calling someone Daddy. I think I would feel different if I had called my father that when I was five. Maybe they're searching for guidance and that fatherly love.

(in reply to katydyd)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 10:02:03 AM   
EvilMasterJ


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I read this thread with extreme fascination. I suppose I never really thought of all the possibilities of the term 'Daddy' in this lifestyle before.

Last year while visiting my slave Aria, she made a plaid skirt, and wore a white cotton blouse and the same color stockings, with bows, to please me. She is not allowed to wear panties in most situations, so you can imagine the pleasure it gave me to have her across my lap for a spanking dressed like that. ~wicked grin~

Having a 19 year old daughter, I guess I haven't really been all that keen on the Daddy/Daddy's little girl thing, although Aria and I have played with it a tiny bit. After reading this thread though I think I can let all that go and pursue it a bit more. My slave is certainly willing, I know. And, knowing she went to Catholic school and hated wearing those red plaid skirts just gives me more evil ideas.

Thanks, y'all
J

(in reply to junecleaver)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 10:03:05 AM   
BobcatsLilMinx


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I love being my Mastrer's little girl... I have the knee high white socks, the little black buckle shoes, and I love dressing up as a little schoolgirl... braids and skirt, just the dressing up itself makes me so hot!! But I cannot see that I will ever call him "Daddy". As someone else said, I was terrified of my father, and my associations with the word are not at all pleasant.

But Master does fill that gap for me, the older man taking care of me, being there for me, being proud of me when I do well, and disappointed when I don't do as well as we both know I could have done. And then as well as filling that gap, he is another person completely, beng my lover, my companion... my Master *smiles*

It is true what someone else said... I forget who now... a lot of subs (especially if they had a hard time growing up, I'd imagine) like the security and safety a Daddy Dom presents, the idea of being special, taken care of, loved and looked after... "Master" or "Lord" is more of an authorative figure, a demanding character, to which the sub is a slave, so far below them in status that they barely exist. "Daddy" is cuddly and loving, almost an equal, but not quite, because he is your "elder and better" and needs lots of respect. Yeah, those are two extremes, but those are the images those words create for me. "Daddy" takes care of you and is "safe"; "Master" is in charge and will do what he likes - he is not "safe".

I prefer the "Master" tag. And I believe he finds it even more sexy to have a little girl calling him "Master" than "Daddy" anyway.... hehehe.

Respectfully,
Minx

(in reply to junecleaver)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 1:34:10 PM   
DesertRat


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There's that damn communication thing again. My slave is indeed my little girl in so many ways. I can take care of her, support her emotionally, encourage her, push her and protect her. She is also so much more...everything a girl can possibly be, in fact.

We've talked about this (seems like I say that a lot) and, even in 'little girl mode' I don't want her to call me 'Daddy'. *smiles* That works out well, since she doesn't want to do that. Also, she is right in saying that I find it MUCH more erotic to have my sexy little girl calling me Master. I'm getting a little warm just sitting here thinking about it, in fact.
Where is that little Minx?

Bob

(in reply to BobcatsLilMinx)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/17/2005 2:19:07 PM   
lil1v


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*nods* I was more talking about the DaddyDom dynamic than the verbage. I don't mind being called "His lil girl" or "His lil one".. but definately cannot call a Dom "daddy" unless it in reference to him being the parent of a child.

The term "Daddy" to me.. will always bring up incestuous and oh not so good images in my head.



_____________________________

V



(in reply to DesertRat)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/18/2005 4:11:48 AM   
lovingmaster45


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Joined: 9/16/2004
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quote:

Age play generally has little to do with relative chronological age, at least for me. Someone can have "daddy" energy and be younger than me. Someone can have "little girl energy" and be older than me.

"Daddy" energy is unique - protective, nurturing, authoritative, tutorial, etc. - but isn't not generally about whether or not someone is older than me. It's genderless for me too....women can have "daddy" energy just like men can.


I am heartened to see at least one person on this site "gets it".

I am Master to susan; but "Daddy" to lee ann. They each have different needs and I play different roles to each.

_____________________________

Master Jerry


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RE: Daddy? - 4/18/2005 5:38:01 AM   
diaperedbaby


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I agree with many. I think using "Daddy" takes it to a more personal level.
Using Master, Lord or anything like that puts the Dom at a distance.
That is just my opinion

(in reply to Leonidas)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: Daddy? - 4/21/2005 12:04:45 AM   
RiotGirl


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Well its abit of an old thread..... but i liked it and wanted to put in my .6295.3 cents in. i dont use the word "daddy" Though i may like it, it still makes me abit shy and ermmmm, i suppose just shy. Err, maybe embarressed. i dunno. It would fit in very well at times and i agree its about the energy. As we dont age play. Heck, i even call him "baby" sometimes. He never refers to me as his little girl, or little one. And i am older then him.

But still its there. Brought to my attention about 2 weeks ago. As i was told, i am his little girl. Told to me as i was sitting on his lap bawling my eyes out because i wouldnt see him for two weeks. It was like a light being lite when he told me that. As he is kind of my "daddy" He does nuture, and guide, teach and discipline, instruct and be there emotionally. i agree its just like a Dom, or a Master, but with a warmer tone. As i call him Master.. but when i think "daddy" (as i dont use it yet) its just some how warmer...

its completely "strange" to me personally. Though i will slightly admit to liking it. i tend to be tolerant of others and intolerant of myself and still trying to over come the stigmatism with it all. This post was great in learning more about it

Thanks

On a lighter side...... anyone wonder if maybe it has something to do with the whole Freud theory?

(in reply to diaperedbaby)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/21/2005 2:19:32 PM   
afmvdp


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I think that is part of it, in where Master denotes ownership Father denotes a far closer relation. I've written more than enough on this topic though... haha

(in reply to RiotGirl)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/22/2005 2:53:53 PM   
knkywch


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Joined: 7/23/2004
From: Cal-iFORN-eye-yay
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I don't usually take time to read through such long threads, but this one caught me. I adore the Daddy/girl (boy, boi, little one... whatever) dynamic. It's got such a mix of sensations for me emotionally. I love Carol Queen's book The LeatherDaddy and the Femme. Totally hot! That's more about the Leather Daddy/boy relationship that connotes mentor energy. But I also like the dark side of Daddy energy...

I have a great dad and step-father whom I love. But there are boundaries there and I like them. With the adult-adult Daddy/child roles, we can move into darker, more sadistic energy mixed with the caring and loving and nurturing. I like Daddy to be alternatively seductive, mean, possessive, nurturing, safe, controlling... For me, the play is not purely about parenting so much as it is about playing with the taboo and looking at a sense of embarrassment and shame from being an adult woman being treated like a little girl (or teenager) and totally getting off on it. For me, there is a mixture of resistance and submission. It's about confronting those trust issues in a psychologically scary way. In those times when I am a little girl, I *have* to let go of my adult woman's control to slip into the little girl headspace. It is definitely about sex for me.

The concept of being punished and used by Daddy is utterly, slip-slidingly hot. And I think part of that turn-on comes from the level of taboo and risk to enter into that dynamic which can look a lot like catering to pedophelia. IMHO, it is a type of psychological edgeplay. Why? Well, I am a mother and I have a lot of kids in my life that I love. I do NOT want them exposed to sexuality or engaging in sexually-charged power dynamics until they are at an age and experience level to make that decision as an equal. IMO, the people engaging in sexual activities NEED to start at power parity. And children (including teens who think they aren't children...) do not possess that level of personal power. Period. So, while I think pedophelia's sad, frustrating, destructive, and repulsive, I find that adult-adult play with characteristics of pedophelia is hot.

I like to PLAY victim where all the participants are excited and getting energy from the interaction. (I also like play rape -- another tender issue-- because rough sex and a seemingly scary and out-of-control dynamic is wholly different from a non-consensual attack.) Can you tell I'm not all that politically correct?

kw


_____________________________

I don't think I'm gay. I don't think I'm straight. I think I'm just slutty. Where's MY parade? -Margaret Cho-

(in reply to afmvdp)
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RE: Daddy? - 4/26/2005 8:58:36 PM   
InHisChains


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quote:

ORIGINAL: EvilMasterJ

I read this thread with extreme fascination. I suppose I never really thought of all the possibilities of the term 'Daddy' in this lifestyle before.

Last year while visiting my slave Aria, she made a plaid skirt, and wore a white cotton blouse and the same color stockings, with bows, to please me. She is not allowed to wear panties in most situations, so you can imagine the pleasure it gave me to have her across my lap for a spanking dressed like that. ~wicked grin~

Having a 19 year old daughter, I guess I haven't really been all that keen on the Daddy/Daddy's little girl thing, although Aria and I have played with it a tiny bit. After reading this thread though I think I can let all that go and pursue it a bit more. My slave is certainly willing, I know. And, knowing she went to Catholic school and hated wearing those red plaid skirts just gives me more evil ideas.

Thanks, y'all
J

I still hate wearing red after all these years - but I’d do it for you any day, Master. *wink*

I believe the reason for the rising interest in Daddy Doms is as varied as each of us is within our own individual relationships. I also believe that the use of the word "Daddy" gives much the wrong impression. Being a Daddy Dom, for the most part, has little to do with incestuous relationships.

We belong to a community where perversion is the norm. While perversion unites us, our individual comfort level in certain types of kink divides us. Its human nature to wonder why others are comfortable doing things that we can’t or won’t do. Yet, we’re intelligent human beings that seek to go beyond society’s norms. Perhaps our search for the answer as to why we are here causes us to attempt to over-analyze others within the community.

Being a Daddy Dom doesn’t necessarily mean that someone lusts over under aged kids. A lot of this desire is built upon fond memories of the past, such as remembering how cute their classmates were in their pony tails, plaid skirts and cheerleading outfits. First love, first unrequited love… none of us ever forgets those times. For the young people here, there’s little to look back upon yet, but you’ll get there one day.

If you’re involved with someone that has reached mid-life crisis, though… lookout lol! This is the typical age group that fuels the market for schoolgirl uniforms, etc. The baby-boomer generation (late 40s to early 60s in chronological age) outnumbers every other age group in the US. They’re getting old, perverted and lecherous… yet as a majority, they grew up in more stable, traditional households than most persons born in the last 35 years.

As some mentioned earlier, a dominant of any gender in the Daddy mode may provide their submissive/slave with different a different type of interaction than normal. (Unless they are full-time Daddies) This might allow the submissive/slave a bit more freedom in speaking openly if there are having difficulty in communicating in a stricter atmosphere. A Daddy listens and can be trusted. They take charge, and use their wisdom, knowledge and experience to redirect their cherished one in a loving manner as needed. However, a dominant in Daddy mode may choose to be extremely strict because they realize that his or her charge may be reaching out for more focus, discipline, guidance and love in this situation.

On the flip side, being a Daddy Dom doesn’t even require use of the name Daddy… it may be nothing more than a relaxed atmosphere where two communicate on a more casual level. Dominants can’t be “on” 24/7. They get tired like everyone else does, and need some downtime. Some may slip into the Daddy mode without giving it thought because they are too exhausted to play the evil dominant at that time. Ironically, they can gather a lot of valuable information that they may not otherwise obtain. Being in a comfortable atmosphere another fosters trust.

While Master and I don’t do the Daddy Dom thing at this time, I respect those that do for the most part. I’ve seen the term used realistically in simple and poly relationships, and also used as something that unites nothing more than a clique of friends that revolve around one Daddy figure.

For the record, though. I have no problem with using the ‘Daddy’ word while involved in play - or simply to throw a curveball now and then just for fun. For example, I could call Him Daddy at the grocery store when shopping together. No reason in particular, other than it can bring certain thoughts to mind. Making my Master smile, and fueling his appetite for things other than food is part of my job ~wicked grin~

I’m not a brat, and I never do things to provoke My Master intentionally. But how evil would it be if I were turned over His knee right then and there, in front of strangers? I’d be mortified! But then again, knowing that he chose to react in that manner would make me one heck of a happy camper because in some perverse way, I may have pleased Him. Or, I may have embarrassed the heck out of Him lol… it’s all good.

(in reply to EvilMasterJ)
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RE: Daddy? - 2/24/2007 7:48:26 AM   
xwucee


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Joined: 1/3/2007
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Hi daddy can i be your cute boy.contact me if u like.

(in reply to GoddessJules)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: Daddy? - 2/24/2007 8:05:48 AM   
xwucee


Posts: 2
Joined: 1/3/2007
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mail me daddy and u will see right of me ok.
[email protected]
i will send u my pics ok.bye

(in reply to lovingmaster45)
Profile   Post #: 120
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