Fastlane's first comments are, in a high pitched voice....to whoever said "why did we smear crunchy P-nut butter all over fastlane?"
"That's not crunchy P-nut butter, those are real nuts you're trying to chew on!"
Fastlane looks desperately for the nearest fire escape and realizes, there are none. In a panic he screams "Fergus how can you live in a place without a fire escape? We could all be in terrible danger with this sort of Hot activity taking place."
Fergus, so calm and collected, answers coyly, "Dude, this is a first floor apartment, relax and enjoy, you are in good hands!"
Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.