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RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/9/2009 10:08:46 AM

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The difference there is that it is in email. Taking the time to write the email to someone who either inquired, or to whom you have expressed some interest. Putting it on a profile seems more bluster than anything to me.
Along the lines of saying:
I AM GREAT! What do you have to offer me?
I will say that I have very specific standards of what I find acceptable in someone I for whom I will be laying down. For me, they have to meet those standards or it will never go further. But.. I don't view that as being worthy of me. They may be perfectly talented, funny, skilled, ect as people, but just not for me. So they are worthy of having someone who is more suited to them.
Worthiness .. I guess I equate that as saying you are either good enough as a human or not.
Bias colored by my own insecurities.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: VampiresLair

I will admit in emails I have used the "If you are worthy of my time and energy" line. However, it has also been followed with what makes someone worthy of that time and energy. If we have nothing in common and no where to grow, you arent worthy of my time becasue you would be a bad match. If we have a lot in common, we enjoy the same things and there might be a future, you were.
DV

(in reply to VampiresLair)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/9/2009 10:36:10 AM

WiseCracknSadist

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I've found that in the D/s there are a lot of theatrics. From dress, to fantasy, to gow one presents ones self to a potential mate.

That's all it is. If you dig it cool if you don't then that's one less message you have to send.

(in reply to CaringandReal)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 10:34:29 AM

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I think its one of those things you pick up. When you are called on it it is something that you cannot justify because you might not even know where you got it from. Its jus an ol domme cliche saying.

(in reply to CaringandReal)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 1:30:38 PM

agirl

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My first question would be *worthy of what?*...Usually there isn't much dialogue beyond that.

agirl

(in reply to Missokyst)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 1:42:03 PM

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That would prompt me to say, and what makes you so damn special?

*shrugs*

(in reply to CaringandReal)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 1:46:02 PM

MistressScarlot

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Joined: 12/7/2006
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Often, it seems,
definitions are in the eye of the beholder.
Or, er...Y/you catch My drift.

To Me, when I say that phrase...
I'm simply stating that I actually think I am something.
That I am something of /value/.
And I do think I'm amazing!
That knowledge is hard-won.

And, to Me, the "if you are worthy" phrase also extends
the /possibility/ that you too might be all of those things I just mentioned, about Myself.

On both sides, these things can only be proven over time.
But as someone who knows, through experience, that She's amazing...
with a lot to offer...
why would I be interested in someone offering /less/?

That wouldn't even make sense.

But I guess I come at that phrase from an entirely different place. And I do tend to be an optimist.
I'm /hoping/ that worth will be proven, over time.
I have no issue proving worth either...
but I'm certainly not standing with clenched fists
demanding P/people "prove worthy"....
::laughing!::

Thanks for listening.
Ms S

(in reply to agirl)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 5:30:29 PM

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I don't want to be worthy. The unworthy people are a lot more fun.

_____________________________

You know it's going to be a GOOD blow job when she puts a Breathe Right strip on first.

Pick-up artists and garbage men should trade names.

(in reply to MistressScarlot)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 6:20:44 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Ok.. was on the other side seeing if I had any mail (lol don't know why I rarely do).. and I see something along the lines of this in a profile.
I will take you .. if you're worthy.
Normally I let things pass but that's the third time in a week that the first profile I see, has a similar line.
I tend to see things from a couple viewpoint so I may be lost here. But when you see that phrase.. or put it in your own profile, what does that mean to you?
Kyst

One word: NEXT.....

_____________________________

"If you bother me again I shall visit you in the small hours of the night and put a bat up your nightdress".
~Basil Fawlty

Collared June 4th, 2008
Love is giving him the power to destroy you, but trusting him not to.

(in reply to Missokyst)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 6:40:55 PM

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It doesn't bother me, why should it? It doesn't imply that the writer of such phrase does not think he does not have to be worthy, too.

_____________________________

Enjoy when you can, and endure when you must.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

(in reply to Missokyst)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 8:08:06 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: feydeplume
For some people as IronBear said, it means that yes the sub does have to prove that they are worth the time and effort AND ABLE TO HAVE a healthy relationship. In that context "worthy" means "not a do-me sub, a bedroom only sub, searching for a traditional marriage with spicy sex,

I could be perfectly content with a Dominant masochist, someone who wanted to only express D/s through play/etc., or who wanted a regular relationship with BDSM without D/s. I could also be happy in a D/s relationship. It depends on how I interact with/react to the other person, and a lot on what relationship shape they are focused on. Why would any of those options be unhealthy? I wouldn't consider the other person unworthy based on one of those things, though there are other things that are really important/necessary to me.

< Message edited by Andalusite -- 2/19/2009 8:19:51 PM >

(in reply to feydeplume)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/19/2009 8:20:37 PM

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I have used similar phrases in emails: "worth my time", "don't want to waste my time", the former generally out of frustration when I've received my fifth one-line email of the night and the latter when I've struck up some kind of conversation where it's not readily apparent if our interests are similar enough to continue corresponding (ie, they aren't saying they love things I can't stand, or mention hard limits for what I like, but neither are some of the things I'm very interested mentioned.) That's when there's usually a flurry of questions sent back in response, and I will sometimes mention that I ask a ton of questions on first contact simply because I don't care to waste either mine or their time.

But in a profile, with no context to put it in... yeah, that does strike me as a wee bit of asshattery

_____________________________

We raise bloody hands to the sky and scream, not from fear, but from joy... The cathartic moment when we plunge our hands into the hot blood of our enemies and there is no civilized thought to stop us from dancing on their graves - Laurell K Hamilton

(in reply to Andalusite)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/20/2009 1:59:52 PM

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I just have to laugh at this.. the person that posts this statement has put so little thought into their profile that it ends up being funny.
"If you're worthy".. what's worthy? If we just go with the "commonly listed desireable qualities in a sub" that seem to be everywhere.. then if the sub is obedient, pleasant, attractive, sexually deviant to the point of never refusing anything, and open to doing whatever the "Master" says, they're PERFECT! And therefore, worthy.
However, how does this relate to 2 people being emotionally, personally, sexually, and Lifestyle compatible?? I very much doubt it.
If someone wants to say "If you're worthy".. then they need to express what "worthy" means to them.. which will reduce incoming messages to a dribble, I'm sure.
I'd recommend "are we compatible" as a far more useful introduction.

(in reply to CaringandReal)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/20/2009 2:10:43 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

It's an eyeroll... someone's a little full of themselves.

*throatcheck*

Sooooo true. You can almost hear them cackling manaically in the distance...I'll pass on the melodrama, thank you.

(in reply to Lynnxz)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/20/2009 5:25:18 PM

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quote:

But when you see that phrase.. or put it in your own profile, what does that mean to you?

What does it mean to me? NEXT.

(in reply to Missokyst)

RE: "If you're worthy" - 2/20/2009 9:27:24 PM

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Joined: 4/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

My first question would be *worthy of what?*...Usually there isn't much dialogue beyond that.

agirl

Worthy of getting inducted to the “Submissive Hall of Fame” maybe?

_____________________________

Everywhere man blames nature and fate, yet his fate is mostly but the echo of his character and passions, his mistakes and weaknesses... Democritus

(in reply to agirl)

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