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Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 2:23:14 AM

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I'm putting this in humor because I consider the 'Fanny Fart' to be quite amusing!
Any woman that claims never to have one is either fibbing or is not having a very adventurous sex life.

It can be a real passion killer can't it?
Your right in the middle of some full on passion when your pussy starts to sound like a badly played bagpipe. It kind of kills the moment.
I used to get all embarrassed when I blew that unwelcome raspberry out of my front bottom! I would blush and hope he'd not heard or just pretend I was in the middle of such a great orgasm that he wouldn't dare stop me to ask 'what the hell was that?'
It only happens in certain positions and where as before, I would do everything to avoid that position, we have now learn't to see the funny side.

So how do you people deal with fanny farts? Are they the unspoken enemy? or do you have a good giggle about them?

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 2:35:17 AM

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It's all about the vagina today for you, isn't it, maria?

Even worse is afterwards when you think you've expelled all that air only to be sitting down relaxing, get up to get something and your vagina quacks, even more embarrassing is when friends have popped round unexpectedly and say, "did you hear that? I swear it was a duck drowning."

Reality has learned to live with my fanny farts and we both have a damn good laugh about it when it happens, it also helps when I point out his arse trumping as a result of a buttplug removal which has him fog horning for hours and the neighbours thinking we were two people they should not have moved next door to.

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 3:17:38 AM

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Janie Im being a bit daft this morning and your post had me howling

Your absolutely right, it does sound like a duck and that possibly explains why my inquisitive Begal cats come sniffing around when it happens!
Yes afterward can be quite musical! and the annoying thing is you just can't hold it in or do a silent one!

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 3:32:50 AM

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I'm still laughing here! We're a daft pair of mares.

The duck is gonna quack so the question is, how does one disguise their 'quacking'? You can always spot a not-so-secret quacker, it's the one that gets up out of their seat and coughs as they move to another room, the peculiar gait is another quack giveaway. But, I say to these people, be proud of the quacking duck, it's a sign that you're getting some quality grinding.

My cats always look at me strangely, as if to say, "I didn't know what to do with the last bird that landed infront of me, ya think I'd be any wiser now?"

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 6:43:08 AM

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omg, my sides hurt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 6:54:00 AM

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GreedyOne, you're one brave lady coming out in public sympathy like this with Maria and I. When it's at its most melodic, it becomes my 'beat box'. This is proof enough that you truly are a brit at heart, dahlink!

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 7:03:29 AM

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I wonder if I could use it with immigration?

*snort*

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 7:14:49 AM

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Oh, that's good! It's all that compression when the piston has a tight fit. Kind of like an internal combustion engine. Stroke - fart, stroke - fart, stroke - fart.

i laughed so hard my sides hurt, my eyes started tearing up, my nose is running and i peed myself.

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 8:56:46 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffypet61

Oh, that's good! It's all that compression when the piston has a tight fit. Kind of like an internal combustion engine. Stroke - fart, stroke - fart, stroke - fart.

i laughed so hard my sides hurt, my eyes started tearing up, my nose is running and i peed myself.

Imagines this bit

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 8:58:27 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMorrigan

GreedyOne, you're one brave lady coming out in public sympathy like this with Maria and I. When it's at its most melodic, it becomes my 'beat box'. This is proof enough that you truly are a brit at heart, dahlink!

Exactly and I have just realized that most Americans won't come to this thread because of the word 'fanny'

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 9:44:07 AM

MarksFantasyGirl

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That is WHY I came in here! lmao. I just HAD to find out what it was all about...

And I'm glad I did! lol

My ex used to throw a fit about it... And I would always yell at Him and say "It's YOUR fault!" With Sweets, it happens afterwards. But at least He falls asleep afterwards, and I can just let it rip! lol I hate when you just go to lie down after some doggy style, and WHOOSH! Another dead duck. I used to get embarrassed. Sweets ignores it, so I don't mind. But when it tickles, and makes me laugh.... then it happens over and over with every chuckle. lol

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 9:48:37 AM

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aaaaaaah the quim queef, first time its embarrasing, ok the first five times, but when you are with a regular lover, it becomes fartsical:)
Ive had many a maniacal laugh and just made matters worse, I tend to laugh HARD and of course that just evacuates more air, trying to use muscle control just makes it squeak or quack, LMAO ooooh heavens im passing this on to hubby. he has been known to hold me down and make me giggle till there is nothing left.

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 10:18:14 AM

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this thread makes my sides hurt.....

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 11:25:40 AM

FourQ

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Is this a women only thread or can we blokes join in?

While I've been in the target area of a few fanny farts in my time the finest, without a shadow of doubt, must have been when the ex sneezed.
They say a duck's quack has no echo, and nobody knows why.
This particular quack echoed! Boy did it echo, and kept on doing so. I swore the double glazing rattled from the initial quack and yours truly was in the blast radius.

We simply looked at each other and burst in to fits of hysterics.
What else can you do?

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 11:29:10 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Any woman that claims never to have one is either fibbing or is not having a very adventurous sex life.

It may just be envy talking here, lol, but any woman with an adventurous sex life shouldn't worry about a little thing like that. After all, it is merely an example of the ideal gas laws in play. Much more worrisome is the other expellations that may come about......that is ew.
Thank you for the chuckle!

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 11:37:34 AM

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All things considered, I really don't have this particular problem myself..........but omg was this thread fun to read!!

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 3/18/2009 11:38:09 AM >

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 11:43:33 AM

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I've only made it to MM's post, and I'm laughing my ass off.... I've never laughed so hard reading a thread. Quack!!! Bad played bagpipe! I'm dying here!

ETA, Fog horning OMG!!!!!

< Message edited by girlygurl -- 3/18/2009 11:44:44 AM >

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 11:55:48 AM

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Fannie, you're killing me! You are so dayumed cute! And it makes you laugh? That really made me laugh!!

Cheers to FourQ for posting about the fanny fluffs

Honestly, I have not laughed this hard reading a thread ever! Thanks OP for starting this one... I'll look forward to more fanny-tales.

As for myself, yes I was embarrassed as hell the first several times "it" happened. Actually, He used to say "excuse Me" when I'd quack... after all, He was putting the air in there.

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 11:59:57 AM

MarksFantasyGirl

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Well, Girly, The fact that now every time it happens, I'm going to be picturing Donald Duck playing the bagpipes, I'm going to LOSE IT!!! And Seriously, I hate that I'm going to have to explain it to Sweets! lmao!

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Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

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RE: Fanny Farting - 3/18/2009 12:01:44 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MarksFantasyGirl

Well, Girly, The fact that now every time it happens, I'm going to be picturing Donald Duck playing the bagpipes, I'm going to LOSE IT!!! And Seriously, I hate that I'm going to have to explain it to Sweets! lmao!

Oh dear Fannie, That is indeed a sight to think about. I wonder if there's any pics on the net with Donald playing the bagpipes... THAT would be too F'n funny!

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