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RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 1:32:36 PM   
Phoenixandnika


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: Aberdeen Maryland
Status: offline 		Approxiamately 37 million people in the united states live belove what our goverment considers the poverty level which simply means that their income is under a certain amount. Example 2 person household poverty level is $12,830. Which breaks down to them brining home $1069 a month. Which in reality is the equvilant of 2 people working 20-40 hours a week and receiving only minimuime wage.
 
When I lived in Californa I lived in the county with the highest unempoyment rate in the state. (lucky me) Those that lived there and worked locally made minimuim wage or barely above. The rents where insainly expensive. Unless you had a college degree and and worked in a "professional field" you struggled. Did that make you any less of a responsible adult or a dominate or submissive for that matter?
 
In my opinion no. To me I respect someone who busts their butt at a 40 hour job and takes care of business just as much as someone who works in the professional feilds and makes 2xs as much if not more.
 
Phoenix and I moved to where we did because the cost of living was low compared to where I was in California and defenedly lower than Long Island and the wages and jobs where availible for both blue collar and white collar worker IF you where willing to work. I do have an issue with someone who is NOT willing to be an adult, to work, to be a contributing member of their household and society. Though I think that is different than someone not having to work because their spouse ect makes enough to allow that.
 
When we first moved here I worked 40 plus hours a week while Phoenix was looking for a job and watching the kids while I worked. I didnt have an issue with this we were working as a team and where drowining in debt or homeless or going out food. Right now I don't work. I stay at home maintain our household and care for our 2 children. Do I want to work. In truth yes. I have ALWAYS worked. It makes me feel self suffient and proud. However, I understand his reasons for asking me not to. Our son is autistic and child care for a child with disabilities is extremly expensive.
 
 
In life we can focus on things or we can focus on what is important life, living, loving, and what a person gives you as a person. Things come and go. We may not have a 5bdrm house with 4 bathrooms on an acre or have fancy cars or have the "bling" but we are happy as a couple , as parents our children are happy and taken care. So the "bling" isn't all that important I would rather not have it and be with someone I love, someone who loves me, someone who meets my needs as I meet his than someone who can give me stuff.
 
I also think that is a very double sided standards, but the reality is in our society men weather dominate or other wise are brought up to think it is their job to the bread winners the providers.
 
Sorry if this post seems long winded.
 
Nika{Phoenix}


_____________________________

"Life is neither a bed of roses nor a carpet of thorns, it's just what you make of it."



(in reply to ExistentialSteel)
Profile   Post #: 241
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 1:45:18 PM   
VvShadowspawnvV


Posts: 218
Joined: 3/27/2006
Status: offline 		Master has a decent job- we haven't been homeless, hungry, unclothed due to lack of funds, etc. He could have more money if He chose to work all the overtime He was offered... He chooses, instead, to spend that extra time with us, His family. So- would i rather He had the money? Of course not. =)

becca

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 242
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 1:56:02 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear


The Dominants with little income who live on the financial edge or have little money to play with?

Those who sometimes (usually dependent on bill time) have to scrimp and scrape to pay the bills and have money left over for food?

In their situation as long as they are not about to be made homeless, should they be cast aside by the majority of the lifestyle?

Do their character, experience and good name as a sensible and safe Dominant count for nothing?

In other words, is there a financial level in which we as a lifestyle turn our backs and try to forget that they exist?

What say you Dominants and what say you sub/slaves?



First off, dang this is a long thread *g*

Personally i don't think anyone, Dominant or submissive, should be shunned for somehting as silly as their bank account. That is plain ridiculous. People should be shunned for heinous acts towards others, beyond that really what business is it of ours?

The quality of the person should always be more important then what they can buy for you. Financial management is a big deal but if the Dominant is terrible with money and the submissive is a budgeting wizard and is given the control of the finances then what's the problem?

Financially i've been on both sides of the road. At one point in my life i could point at something and it was mine. At another point i needed the little money i had to get to work, so suvived on oatmeal and toast for 2 weeks until i got my first paycheck. As it is now i support myself and have a teeny bit extra for the important things, like a new toy *g*

There will always be people that judge others by their income. i value people on who they are. As it is, in our society right now, most households need a dual income to survive. Does it really matter who brings in the majority of that income?

Every relationship is a partnership and all parties should do what needs to be done to make sure everyone is taken care of, be it emontionally or financially.

Just my thoughts






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(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 243
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 3:45:46 PM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes

quote:

ORIGINAL: mtumwawaBwana

the ole saying " money is the root of all evils" , i believe, it at its truest form. it breeds greed and selfishness. i am not saying i am totally against the green stuff (or in canada....the colourful stuff), i came from a very wealthy family and was forced to choose between my children and my fathers monies. obviously, i chose my children.


The quote is actually "want of money is the root of all evils" - i.e. greed - which goes quite well with your point, but you really should have the quote right (since it actually goes better with your point than what you posted).


Timothy 6:10. 'For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.'


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RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 3:55:27 PM   
meatcleaver


Posts: 9030
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

Timothy 6:10. 'For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.'



Yep. Loving money doesn't make you happy and having money doesn't make you happy but having been in the position of having none and having enough to allow me free time to enjoy life without all the anxiety that goes along with being poor. I'd rather have money because it helps an awful lot towards having a sociable and meaningful life. If we lived in a society where no one had money, money wouldn't matter but we live in a society where large parts are excluded from you if you have none.

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RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:12:48 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

Timothy 6:10. 'For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.'



Yep. Loving money doesn't make you happy and having money doesn't make you happy but having been in the position of having none and having enough to allow me free time to enjoy life without all the anxiety that goes along with being poor. I'd rather have money because it helps an awful lot towards having a sociable and meaningful life. If we lived in a society where no one had money, money wouldn't matter but we live in a society where large parts are excluded from you if you have none.


In my personal experience, the less focus on money and the pursuit of it and the greater focus on charitable use of time and money has resulted in more success, fulfillment and -- ironically -- money (as a side effect, almost as if karma).

Akasha


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(in reply to meatcleaver)
Profile   Post #: 246
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:18:18 PM   
HayaSierra


Posts: 119
Joined: 4/7/2005
From: In Georgia
Status: offline 		Greetings everyone,

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

Too often we have the illusion that Doms have some wealth. Usually with good wages or salaries and perhaps even own their own businesses. (Snip)

The Dominants with little income who live on the financial edge or have little money to play with?

Those who sometimes (usually dependent on bill time) have to scrimp and scrape to pay the bills and have money left over for food?



My family has been on both sides of the Equation, from hitting the lottery when I was only four years old (Father squandered the money on drinking, mother had bad business investment, money go bye-bye before I was seven) to being so poor that what income was made didn't even cover the rent, credit cards maxed out from using them for food and other necessities, and no where really to turn when I was 22 years old.  Money, or the lack thereof, is the ONE thing that can happen really fast. One year you have, the next year you don't -- so I can fully understand if a Dominant ends up having financial trouble. It happens to almost everyone at least once, and I think in those cases it is hardest to be a Dominant. 

For me it is anyhow. When I'm bringing in a good income I provide. I do what I'm there to do. When I'm not bringing in enough money (Like last winter, long story), then I feel like I'm failing both as Dominant and as a person with responsibilities. In that case the WORST anyone could do is try to "abandon" the friendship, or relationship if you have one with them. This is because if you know they are not "leeching" off you, but rather just had a bad event happen (say loss of a job, or illness in the family and more bills), the Low income Dominant will need your friendship and support more than ever.   Many would be too proud to take money, or even a loan -- but there is much other help that can be rendered that even the most stubborn would accept. Prayers. Company and Comfort. Advice and help of how to get out of the situation. Toys that can be made at home for cheap. Things like that.

As for having a relationship with little money, it is just like being married and having little money or like having a parent with little money. If the relationship is close, then money matters less than many may think. You love em just as much, and respect them just as much. Sometimes even more when you see how they cope with the situation and how they work around the barriers presented by not having money to play. So can't go and play in the Bahama's, hey, we can play at home. A submissive/slave that is openminded, and really likes their Dominant and is comfortable in the relationship will not mind, and would even offer to help however they might be able to help. So -- can't go to the spa, well "spa de la casa" is open all night long!  Not having money can be an incredible bonding experience. Hard to deal with -- but something which helps people come even closer.   

Haya Sierra ---

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Profile   Post #: 247
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:27:28 PM   
MasterR001


Posts: 76
Joined: 3/10/2006
Status: offline 		That part of a person that makes them a DOM  (or a sub) has nothing to do with income.

(in reply to HayaSierra)
Profile   Post #: 248
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:37:19 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

Timothy 6:10. 'For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.'



Thank you for getting the quote right.  I was watching some dumb show a few weeks ago and a self-proclaimed preacher actually got it wrong.  It's nice to see some accuracy



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Profile   Post #: 249
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:40:39 PM   
danreeves


Posts: 58
Joined: 3/5/2006
Status: offline 		Hello I think I would tend to agree with master001--the size of a man's wealth does not rule the size of his castle. I grew up in a not so weathly childhood--My father was a bookmaker--my mom a homemaker never knwoing when dad may return home IG he would make it home-but he did rule the roost and he was far from wealthy. So in my opinon NO--money does not make the Dom-his wealth is in his heart and his family(being slaves-subs) whatever- he is a happy man with happy people around him-his wealth is there.

(in reply to MasterR001)
Profile   Post #: 250
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:43:23 PM   
danreeves


Posts: 58
Joined: 3/5/2006
Status: offline 		also--very good comment and answer from Akisha

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Profile   Post #: 251
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:46:33 PM   
sexychick3100


Posts: 1
Joined: 12/7/2005
Status: offline 		The amount of money a dom makes no difference. I would not care if the my dom worked at mcdonalds part time but mine refuses to work lives off of me. So unfortunately i am looking for a nother dom

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Profile   Post #: 252
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 4:49:32 PM   
mtumwawaBwana


Posts: 541
Status: offline 		i guess i need to beg forgiveness for only quoting a portion of the piece..


i , with all humility, beg all for forgiveness

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Profile   Post #: 253
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 5:32:37 PM   
crdavis


Posts: 7
Joined: 4/4/2005
Status: offline 		Hello all.....I just happened to see this topic and wanted to add my two cents worth.  I am a Domme and the sole supporter in my home.  I met a sub several years ago and he has been a friend every since.  He has made almost all the floggers and paddles I have.  He has made me a stockade and a spanking horse.  Whenever he gets the itch to make something, he always thinks of me and asks if I would like such a thing.  Little things mean a lot when you don't have much.  But the most important thing to me, is having a roof over my head, and my daughters also...food to eat, and the great company of the friends we have.  That is all we need......the rest is just "stuff"

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Profile   Post #: 254
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 6:27:44 PM   
Phoenixandnika


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: Aberdeen Maryland
Status: offline 		Greetings,

After reading this post, I have two points to make on it.  To Me, income does not define a Dominant, but...income can affect both self-image and confidence.  Those Dominate that can provide for Theirs, or just provide in general, who are managing Their own finances and making all payments for the things they own, it allows for a certain amount of pride to show through.  Now do not confuse what I said with 'well I need money to be a Man and care for what is Mine'.  Simply that it gives a boost to how we feel, which transcends down into some of what we do.

The other point is that money tends to draw those that are less concerned with the actual relationship than the benefits of being with someone richer.  Saying that perhaps those Dominants that are not as well off may not have to 'weed-out' phoney submissives/slaves as much. 

Now personally I haven't had much experience with the latter, cause My hard-working self just makes the bills, (with help from Mine) lol.  But if You have, I'd be interested to know how truthful My statement about it is. 

I wish all well
Phoenix

_____________________________

"Life is neither a bed of roses nor a carpet of thorns, it's just what you make of it."



(in reply to crdavis)
Profile   Post #: 255
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 6:47:39 PM   
CERCKL


Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline
quote:

The other point is that money tends to draw those that are less concerned with the actual relationship than the benefits of being with someone richer.  Saying that perhaps those Dominants that are not as well off may not have to 'weed-out' phoney submissives/slaves as much. 


I posted on this thread awhile ago...I know that my own income level has been made by choices of my own...I wasn't wealthy but I brought home more than twice what I do now and I am now where I am because I decided pursuing my art, being with my family was more important to me. Then I got laid off and you know, all the problems that my marriage had was suddenly too much for my ex...she and my daughter aren't here now; I still have my son living with me and am going to be relying on my es, who makes a helluva lot more than I do for 'child support' to make ends meet and fulfill necessities for my son...still, I am happier than I was while working a job I hated and putting my ex through school; now if I can start affording supplies again the painting will start and...
So, I damn know well that lotus isn't with me cuz of my wallet.

C



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Profile   Post #: 256
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 7:52:23 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY

quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes

quote:

ORIGINAL: mtumwawaBwana

the ole saying " money is the root of all evils" , i believe, it at its truest form. it breeds greed and selfishness. i am not saying i am totally against the green stuff (or in canada....the colourful stuff), i came from a very wealthy family and was forced to choose between my children and my fathers monies. obviously, i chose my children.


The quote is actually "want of money is the root of all evils" - i.e. greed - which goes quite well with your point, but you really should have the quote right (since it actually goes better with your point than what you posted).


Timothy 6:10. 'For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.'



Different translation, same meaning - I can't remember which translation mine is from, but it does say "want of."  The problem boils down to the same thing though - greed.

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 257
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 10:05:53 PM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

Thank you for getting the quote right.  I was watching some dumb show a few weeks ago and a self-proclaimed preacher actually got it wrong.  It's nice to see some accuracy



Thank you.  This quote almost always referenced when this topic comes up.  And is almost always incorrectly or incompletely quoted.

SweetDommes:

There are many different translations.  I was not "ragging" on you or anyone else, just providing the complete quote from one translation.

***

I am personally what I would call an "ethical capitalist".  Money is one measure of a person, but far from the most important.  However, while I forget who said it, but there is a saying (I thought it was a Heinlein quote) that sums up my overall feelings:

"I've been rich, and I've been poor.  Rich is easier."

***

Some Heinlein "money" quotes:

"Money is a powerful aphrodisiac. But flowers work almost as well."

"Stupidity cannot be cured with money, or through education, or by legislation."

"Money is the sincerest of all flattery.  Women love to be flattered. So do men."

"Money is truthful. If a man speaks of his honor, make him pay cash."

FHky
 



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RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 10:13:25 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mtumwawaBwana

i guess i need to beg forgiveness for only quoting a portion of the piece..


i , with all humility, beg all for forgiveness

No need to beg forgiveness ... this is one of those things that people often get wrong - and that I usually feel the need to correct.  The lack of a couple of words "want of" or "love of" makes the quote into something with a different meaning than originally intended - just like I have heard people quote the Golden Rule as "treat others as they treat you" ... which is not at all what the Golden Rule that I was taught is.  My correction of the quote was simply an automatic response to a commonly misquoted quote (does that sentence make sense?  I'm tired ...). 

I figure that if I correct enough people, either they'll get it right, or they'll shoot me LOL

(in reply to mtumwawaBwana)
Profile   Post #: 259
RE: Low Income Dominants. - 4/20/2006 10:22:05 PM   
Reasonable


Posts: 459
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline 		You can have money and be worthless, or very little and and absolute treasure to someone special. I find it sad that so many measure a man by his money,rather than his heart.

If one has enough to live decently,what more do you really need? Yachts to keep up with the Jones's?

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 260
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