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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 4:44:44 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen

On another note (I don't care if any one hates me for it), I've noticed that it's "older" het people who are saying that "anyone" can do WIITWD and frankly I'm damned tired of letting every 40-something, 300 lb, D&D player come to "extreme" night just to use their bunny fur because they don't fit in anywhere else (you all know who I'm talking about). Fuck "all inclusive"....part of what made the Leather community what it was, was not being "all inclusive".

I can't be the only individual who's tired of being politically correct with kink and expectations of Leather folks' behaviors. I think people of all ages should have to earn their Leather (yes I did) and not get this whole, "well I'm such and such age so I'm 'experienced'" (hanging out on forums doesn't really mean jack when you do nothing for your local Leather Community).

Just sayin...

boi
Future ruler of the Universe serving MsKitty
and squashing politically correct "kink"

Geez now who is sounding ageist? Yes I know that some of the younger crowd don't want the older crowd, just as some of the older crowd seem to object to the younger crowd and some people are very anti the fat brigade, the hetros or the bi's. For some, some just won't fit, haven't got the brownie points, are too soft, too hard, too fucking ugly, under experienced or just plain show offs!!!

As far as the leather brigade.... well all I can say is we don't really have such a thing in the UK apart from a very small fraction that have come over from the US. Nobody has to prove themselves in a club or at a party other than being open minded and without prejudice.

I'm so lucky to know the crowd I do.... I don't have to prove myself to anyone and if they need proof then they can go and poke themselves.

< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 4/22/2009 4:50:06 AM >

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 5:07:29 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

There are actually a lot of very wise youngsters here. If you're not getting the proper respect, try not to take it too personally. <snip>

You'll be older, wiser and more experienced in no time- just use your best judgement. Relaxed confidence will go a long way, so get some. Just be yourself, and you'll attract the kind of people who are like you.

Play, explore, and have FUN!

I'm kind of glad this got said, because it goes to the root of this.

At the OP's age, the truth of the matter is, they don't get respect because they haven't earned respect. The biggest accomplishment that they have under their belt is that they have (hopefully) earned themselves a high school diploma. Before anyone has a fit, yes, there are exceptions. But you also have to understand the definition of the word 'exception' and know that the majority is the general rule.

In most cases, youth is not a terminal condition. If you're young, you're going to get older, and as you do, you're going to learn more, have more experiences, and hopefully do a few things in life to earn the respect that so many seem to want laid at their feet when they haven't done squat. The fact that you want it all, right now, without putting any work in to life experience is exactly the attitude, rather than the number of the years on the spinning globe, that is the issue.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 7:23:21 AM

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I agree LP with this too. It's been my experience that those who are the most bigoted in any matter are usually a small selection who unfortunately seem able to influence others who appear not to be able to think for themselves and are easily lead.

I have a basic rule which was stated most well in the Hornblower books: "I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does." (Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester) It works for me but probably wouldn't work for some others..

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 8:05:47 AM

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you will most likely be looked down upon, or be considered less than, for quite some time. it is something you need to get used to. being belittle by older people with less experience than you. how do i know???????????????????????????? i have a similar situation. i learned from very experienced older men, i learned from these men at an early age. these men were old guard and modified guard, but when i bring that up here, i have people tell me know way, your too young, either that or i get ,,, who, where, what scene?

3years? i am 44 and still am not good enough for many circles of people. but those people are usually the ones who want to talk about lifestyle and hope for lifestyle, the types that have way too much value placed on the munches

(in reply to bandofthehawk176)

RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 10:15:15 AM

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I'm curious.

At the time of your birth the Old Guard were 40 years old. By the time you were old enough to go to a club, they were 60. Did that many 60 year old gay leathermen really want to spend so much time with a straight 18 year old boy?

Because I knew a lot of these types having grown up in one of the gay Fire Island communities, they were neighbors and bridge partners of my mother. I knew their young boyfriends. And none of the ones I knew were wasting time on any adolescents who weren't available to them sexually.

These days of course, they're mostly dead.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 10:45:48 AM

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And he's already made people think he's a collasal dork by some of his posting behaviors, and the fact he refuses to make an effort to spell even simple words right, and many people have suggested how to make sure your posts are spelled correctly, and he just shines them on. Now true it's not fair to base maturity on spelling and grammar abilities, but it helps get a foot in the door, to spell well, and speak well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm kind of glad this got said, because it goes to the root of this.

At the OP's age, the truth of the matter is, they don't get respect because they haven't earned respect. The biggest accomplishment that they have under their belt is that they have (hopefully) earned themselves a high school diploma.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 10:53:48 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I'm curious.

At the time of your birth the Old Guard were 40 years old. By the time you were old enough to go to a club, they were 60. Did that many 60 year old gay leathermen really want to spend so much time with a straight 18 year old boy?

Because I knew a lot of these types having grown up in one of the gay Fire Island communities, they were neighbors and bridge partners of my mother. I knew their young boyfriends. And none of the ones I knew were wasting time on any adolescents who weren't available to them sexually.

These days of course, they're mostly dead.

I don't often feel this urge in response to your posts but I must say "AMEN!"....

And I'm going to clean out the car because the thought of all those wonderful men who paved a pay in such a serious manner for the Leather community being gone is very sad to me.

boi
Future ruler of the Universe serving MsKitty
Who forgets to sign out MsKitty's profile

< Message edited by MsKittyBlack -- 4/22/2009 10:54:16 AM >

(in reply to DesFIP)

RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 11:21:47 AM

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quote:

And he's already made people think he's a collasal dork by some of his posting behaviors, and the fact he refuses to make an effort to spell even simple words right, and many people have suggested how to make sure your posts are spelled correctly, and he just shines them on. Now true it's not fair to base maturity on spelling and grammar abilities, but it helps get a foot in the door, to spell well, and speak well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

If you want to start picking up on spelling and grammar then be sure to get yours right

< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 4/22/2009 11:24:27 AM >

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 11:33:41 AM

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all that jaz, I have spell check but it doesn't catch everything, and I'm not the one asking why I'm not being accepted cause I am young lol and then given the advice to spell well.

Nor am I the one spelling cancer canser lol. If you can't even spell the name of the disease you say you have, that's pitiful.

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

quote:

And he's already made people think he's a collasal dork by some of his posting behaviors, and the fact he refuses to make an effort to spell even simple words right, and many people have suggested how to make sure your posts are spelled correctly, and he just shines them on. Now true it's not fair to base maturity on spelling and grammar abilities, but it helps get a foot in the door, to spell well, and speak well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

If you want to start picking up on spelling and grammar then be sure to get yours right

(in reply to allthatjaz)

RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 11:38:58 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

These days of course, they're mostly dead.

Hey, Celeste. We know that.

We know we are a dying breed.

We know.

We get that the concept of leather isn't a popular one.

Every once in a while, we allow ourselves to think about it.

We know our way of life is coming to an end.

We're aware.

If there were but a few who thought leather was worth preserving, I wouldn't say these things.

There aren't.

_____________________________

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 11:49:17 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

quote:

And he's already made people think he's a collasal dork by some of his posting behaviors, and the fact he refuses to make an effort to spell even simple words right, and many people have suggested how to make sure your posts are spelled correctly, and he just shines them on. Now true it's not fair to base maturity on spelling and grammar abilities, but it helps get a foot in the door, to spell well, and speak well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

If you want to start picking up on spelling and grammar then be sure to get yours right

You are correct about the run-on sentence and the word "colossal".
U.S. spelling drops the "u" from some words which, elsewhere (such as the UK), end in "our" (behavior, color, etc.).
And starting a sentence with a conjunction isn't, in actuality, really a grammatical faux pas.

I figured while everyone is on the grammar/spelling kick...

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(in reply to allthatjaz)

RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 12:02:07 PM

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My spell check didn't flag behaviors as wrong, so is it wrong, or is it one of those things, that, it's a spelling grammar, technicality, cause you can spell it colors, or colours, and both would be right in someones eyes

quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

You are correct about the run-on sentence and the word "colossal".
U.S. spelling drops the "u" from some words which, elsewhere (such as the UK), end in "our" (behavior, color, etc.).
And starting a sentence with a conjunction isn't, in actuality, really a grammatical faux pas.

I figured while everyone is on the grammar/spelling kick...

(in reply to NihilusZero)

RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 12:11:03 PM

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Actually Lady P, my experiences of the original post WWII leathermen is totally different then yours. Admittedly by the time I knew them they were in their 40s and 50s, but seriousness wasn't what mostly concerned them. Hot young guys did it for them.

However Lark keeps saying he was taught by men who were 50 years older than him, and I don't buy it.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 12:24:07 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero
U.S. spelling drops the "u" from some words which, elsewhere (such as the UK), end in "our" (behavior, color, etc.).

And just to add, "elsewhere" includes a lot of people from Europe, like me, who were taught UK English at school. I'd probably write behaviour and colour just as I would write organisation instead of organization, etc. And yes, I might even call that trash can a refuse bin and the subway the underground. And while I try to write correct English, I still make lots of mistakes as I'm not a native speaker. In all honesty, typo's and grammar errors bug ME a lot less than posts that don't have any clear structure or simply have no interpunction or capitals or provide simply incorrect information.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 12:55:14 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

quote:

And he's already made people think he's a collasal dork by some of his posting behaviors, and the fact he refuses to make an effort to spell even simple words right, and many people have suggested how to make sure your posts are spelled correctly, and he just shines them on. Now true it's not fair to base maturity on spelling and grammar abilities, but it helps get a foot in the door, to spell well, and speak well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

If you want to start picking up on spelling and grammar then be sure to get yours right

You are correct about the run-on sentence and the word "colossal".
U.S. spelling drops the "u" from some words which, elsewhere (such as the UK), end in "our" (behavior, color, etc.).
And starting a sentence with a conjunction isn't, in actuality, really a grammatical faux pas.

I figured while everyone is on the grammar/spelling kick...

Actually the point I was making was this.... Don't pull someone up about spelling and grammar. So long as its legible then so what?
No I am not on a grammar and spelling kick. I have dyslexia and I know the shit that goes with it from all those none dyslexics that like to point out with a slightly mocking tone that insignificant spelling mistake.
The ops spelling should not of been picked up on and he certainly shouldn't of been called a dork for it. I hate this kind of put down and I wanted her to know how that felt.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 3:03:07 PM

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quote:

I hate this kind of put down and I wanted her to know how that felt.

She already does know. You aren't the first to get on her about her own errors. She makes a real effort using spell check. Not everyone makes an effort.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/22/2009 6:33:08 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

I have a basic rule which was stated most well in the Hornblower books: "I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does." (Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester) It works for me but probably wouldn't work for some others..

Exactly. I'm judging him on his previous immature posts. When he gets called out on things like coming onto the boards and being disrespectful of his own submissive.....he gets pissy.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/23/2009 2:44:29 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

quote:

I hate this kind of put down and I wanted her to know how that felt.

She already does know. You aren't the first to get on her about her own errors. She makes a real effort using spell check. Not everyone makes an effort.

Then she should know better than to scoff at someone else for spelling and grammar errors.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/23/2009 1:15:53 PM

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Some people are more accepting and understanding towards those who make an effort with it than those who don't and don't care to. I am one of those types myself. Perhaps she is as well. Doesn't really matter. People make their own choices and should be ready for whatever might come in response.

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RE: Why is Youth Such a problem with everyone - 4/23/2009 1:27:33 PM

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If he truly is dyslexic and I really doubt it, then there's no excuse for him not to try to present himself well, with stuff like spell check, and time and patience, there's several people who're dyslexic here, and you'd never guess, because they make the effort to make sure that their posts are mostly correct.

I have no sympathy for people who don't even try to correct or over come their disability to the best of their knowledge or ability. I was wrong for saying it's dorky to not be able to spell cancer, when it's a disease you claim to have fine. I admit that.

Even I with my still mangled run on sentences and stuff, and no real education to speak of, make an effort to be legible. And if you've seen my posts from say like 6 months ago till now, you'd see what a huge improvement they were. Even if they might still be messed up.

I do the best I know how to do. And if someone as lazy as I was and as badly butchered as I was then, , can say that now, then, there's a great improvement.

And people notice, they don't mind so the other grammar errors and stuff cause I make an effort to at least 99.9 percent of the time have things spelled correctly, or have made my best efforts.

And I further cut him less slack, because someone who claims to be a Dominant, in my opinion, and others share this even if they'd never say so out loud, shouldn't be so lazy as to not make an effort to spell check and double check their posts, so they're not bungling them on accident due to their dyslexia.

He also, has in the past made people think he was an idiot by his posting things, and then comes and asks why people have an issue with an 18 y.o dom. Weather he's dyslexic or not, Spelling and grammar aside, Once you open that barn door, and your posting style makes people think less of you, you can't really put that horse back in the barn. So to speak. That more than anything is my point.

Plus when he didn't like the answers he was getting he made some flip remark about thanks for the helpful answers and well for the rest of you I am done coming to this thread.

And yeah it's your right not to come back and check a thread if you don't wanna hear any more answers, but come on. Don't post that you're not coming back because you didn't like the answers you were getting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

quote:

I hate this kind of put down and I wanted her to know how that felt.

She already does know. You aren't the first to get on her about her own errors. She makes a real effort using spell check. Not everyone makes an effort.

Then she should know better than to scoff at someone else for spelling and grammar errors.

< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 4/23/2009 1:43:35 PM >

(in reply to allthatjaz)

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