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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 7:56:18 PM

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LAsubgirl, you are a sweetheart and very interesting! You just go with what makes you comfortable and you will find someone... I am sure of it!

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 7:59:54 PM

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You haven't had (or are you saying you have had once) chemistry on first meeting and later you did have passion? I'm sorry if I misunderstood what you said...

I honestly feel an instant chemistry with someone or I don't. An attraction has to be there organically or it just doesn't work for me ultimately. The attraction could just be physical - oh the reason I'm on CM today since with that woman it was physical - or more likely it's both, phyiscal and emotional like most of my relationships.

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 8:07:32 PM

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Oh thanks Lockit. I just can't seem to get any real women - gosh I'm hoping 'most' have been women - to meet me for a Starbucks. I was starting to think either coffee was some code word in bdsm that means 'don't do it' or everyone just hates Starbucks...

And honestly, not one of these women have met me and I do better in person. It's great if my writing here does show my personality (I'm a screenwriter after all) but I guess I have less to hide then most so I want to be face to face. At least my last date, in just my normal baby doll T said I was hot. Who would have thought with all the models and LA glam girls around.

But this whole bdsm interest I have now...I just had to put....a new - kink - into my dating world....(smile).

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 8:42:01 PM

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Yeah, I'm having the same problem with coffee or a lunch or dinner meeting. I'm apparently terribly intimidating or something.

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 9:07:47 PM

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The problem with people who won't meet for a cup of coffee or a bite to eat is that they aren't ready to face reality, in the form of you. I wouldn't feel bad about it; I've had some truly hilarious moments with people who were trying to be ready for something that they weren't really ready to cope with in real life. I actually had one guy flee from a photo shoot that I was doing with two other photographers and another male model--flee in such a hurry that his tires were screeching. One minute I'm leading him up a flight of stairs chatting about the photos he had wanted to do; the next, the door is banging behind him and he's driving away in a cloud of dust, so fast you would have thought I was going to take one of his kidneys and leave him bleeding in a bathtub full of ice somewhere.

I laughed so hard it hurt. Best flake ever.

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 9:34:01 PM

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I won't meet someone right away. Something has to click in email, messenger and by phone before I will do all it takes to meet. I have met quickly before and it was nothing but a pain in the ass! There was too much I didn't know and it always meant I had to fend someone off or deal with a drunk I didn't know drank or something. Now, I get to know them enough to feel ready to meet them and if that is too much to ask/expect or get... too bad. I'm not that hungry. I can wait.

When I do meet people doing things my way... it has never failed to go right and everyone was pleased with the situation. I can't say that with the quicker one's. The no shows... the stupid shit... I don't get it anymore the way I do things.

I am ready for the good stuff.. but will not tolerate the shitty stuff.

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 9:39:51 PM

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From: Chico, Nor-Cali
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Aw, LAsubgirl, I'll be in L.A. this summer & I'll meet ya for a cup of tea, purely on a friendly basis . ... . Tho' I'm not much on Starbucks, so maybe you'll know of some funky locally-owned place . . . . . .

Yeah, there's a higher-than-average proportion of the plastic-perfect-pretty people in SoCal, but there's still plenty of people who appreciate reality, so buck up . . . . . Even in L.A. it's what's inside that counts, especially with BDSM (in my not-so-humble) . . . ..

& remember to practice your patience, always . . . .

(in reply to LAgirlsub)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 9:53:29 PM

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Before a better site came along for Me to keep in contact with those that I socialize with in Atlanta, I used to chat on a particular site. It was the best way to make dinner plans, etc., before the group of us would go to the club. I was doing just that when clip happened into the same chat room, saw Me discussing such things, and asked if he might come along. At the time, I told him that it was a public club and all he had to do was drive himself up there.

Knowing how folks will talk a good game in chat rooms and then fail to follow through, I didn't think a thing of it until the next evening. While sitting at dinner, the DM of the club called My cell to say that there was someone at the club waiting for Me. Yep, he drove all that way, just to meet Me, even after I told him that there would be no play that first night. That was just about two years ago now. Same boy who's now collared and made it rather evident yesterday how much the Dominant in his life means to him. (Can't say I agree with his methods, but his intentions were good.)

The moral of the story? Sometimes, things happen by chance. They aren't planned by the ways we devise to meet others. I've attempted to build something with someone that I knew for a year in email that lasted less than a couple of months. Someone that I chatted with one time before meeting in person has lasted years. While some methods do seem to work better than others, you really just never know.

ETA a ps. I'm headed to CA in just a few months, but I don't do Starbucks.

< Message edited by LadyPact -- 5/4/2009 9:55:22 PM >

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 11:18:19 PM

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Oh gosh - so it IS a Starbucks issue. OK, do you like Peets? Even better yet, I love Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf...

LadyPact...if you're coming to LA, you fill in the blank...you would like a coffee or tea at (blank) in LA and if I'm in town (probably - a few travel plans) I'll be there.

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 11:23:15 PM

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DemonKia, sure as friends (no problem) like I said to LadyPack, you fill in the blank...(I knew Starbucks must have been part of the problem -smile)....Coffee Bean and Tea leaf is a nice place...

http://coffeebean.com/

Just email me when.

And then maybe you can post I'm real...

(in reply to DemonKia)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 11:29:03 PM

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MP has already properly been informed that, once we hit CA, I'm going to be so glad to meet folks from the boards face to face. As for where, I'm pretty easy to get along with. Any place that serves diet pepsi and a corner or patio for good conversation works for Me.

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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LAgirlsub)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 11:47:28 PM

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Otay. You're easy LP...how often do you hear that? (smile)

Since I just looked up Coffee Bean I noticed this...for anyone who has a location near them:

On Thursday, May 7th from 4-8pm, enjoy a complimentary Iced Coffee at your neighborhood The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf®!

For every Iced Coffee that we give away at our Southern California locations, we’ll donate $0.25 to Big Sunday, a leading nonprofit organization that mobilizes and empowers volunteers to help make their communities stronger, happier and healthier.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 11:51:44 PM

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For that, I'd be willing to drink iced coffee, with maybe a little mocha.

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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to LAgirlsub)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/4/2009 11:57:51 PM

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You all are making me homesick! I want a visit, sitting by the beach... My island picture isn't working!

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/5/2009 12:56:02 AM

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I'd say visit now...before it gets too hot. Today was terrific, about 80, sunny with a breeze...grabbed those new Brazilian flip flops (sounding so LA) but didn't get that mani/pedi....smile.

(in reply to Lockit)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/5/2009 12:59:15 AM

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Big Sunday is actually a 'Big' deal....it's city-wide and helps all kinds of organizations...my sister did her e-cycling at her Temple. So I've got to get that cold drink (it's good...it's hot here) and help raise those donations.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/5/2009 3:12:40 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LAgirlsub

I lowered my typical defenses (yes my mistake big time) with online interaction because I'm talking to (I hope) domme women and the very first one made all these demands. I thought because of the type of dynamic or power relationship I'm seeking, that I was suppose to accept this behavior.

Hi LAgirl, I wouldnt worry about the above, I think it could well be a mistake most newcomers make, especially in chat rooms. Im guilty myself of that. I think its over eagerness that does it, although it may have been Testosterone.

There were several things I found different about getting to know someone online, that really differed from normal dating. Firstly, if you go the the cinema or a concert, a large part of the time is spent watching the entertainment. If you are just chatting online, the whole time is spent getting to know each other. There isnt the added distraction of sexual attraction getting in the way either. That said, moving to phone and webcam ( I didnt get naked, except that one time, at band camp ) enabled the relationship to move on. so much so that I eventually overcame my fear of flying, by making my first flight a 12 hour trip.

Maybe it isnt so much how you meet, but who you meet ?

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/5/2009 3:39:43 AM

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..... try to add Me to their 'circle of friends' after only one email, especially if I've never responded to them.

.....send Me an unrequested photo.

.....email Me some unsolicited opinion about anything on my profile.

Three surefire ways to get blocked.

TexasMaam

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/5/2009 4:23:43 AM

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.....email Me some unsolicited opinion about anything on my profile.

Oh gawd, I always make a comment about something in someone's profile - if only to show that I've read it. It's always a comment on something non-sexual and I'll try to make it vaguely humorous. I'm hoping that by 'unsolicited opinion' you mean something too personal, or too critical?

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RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits - 5/5/2009 4:40:41 AM

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TexasMaam, on your last comment/annoyance...I do read profiles and sometimes there will be something I'm curious about so I might send an email and comment. So do you mean someone being judgmental and not just commenting?

(in reply to TexasMaam)

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