RE: Sub vs. Slave

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Sub vs. Slave

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Sub vs. Slave

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/17/2009 6:54:37 PM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline

See, that's another benefit of the Rice Krispies.... leave'em out in the open for a week and they're the same as the ones fresh out of the box...

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Asherdelampyr)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/17/2009 6:55:50 PM

Posts: 9556
Joined: 11/14/2006
From: The Desert
Status: offline

Well yeah but that is because when you first get them they taste nasty and stale

_____________________________

Pirate King,

The nicest man you'll ever bleed for

Posting Help

Vitam Piratae Eligo

The Rainmaker

(in reply to Level)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/17/2009 7:15:58 PM

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

~fr~

Here...a post that was made some time ago that very nicely covers what EVERYONE AND ANYONE chooses to define in regards to these oh-so-wonderful discussions that we always seem to get stuck in.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2246849/mpage_1/tm.htm

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to Asherdelampyr)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 7:42:35 AM

Posts: 14412
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetgirlserves

DesFIP,
Seems from what you've posted in this thread and another one recently, you are always on the look out, concerned that your 'dom' might be 'fucking up'. If this is the case, then certainly, my definition would not apply. I am glad that you are intelligent enough to help the poor male you have submitted to from constantly making mistakes. He must be so very grateful to you.

~sgs

"D" types are not infallible and not omnipotent. My role is to make his life easier. If I don't point out a mistake coming down the road, then I've failed him.

Your post was rude. Beyond that, you're poking at someone that's been in the same D/s relationship for (if I remember correctly) for more than a decade.

The bottom line is that you can espose on what it is to be a submissive or slave, but unless you have the ability to make it work within a relationship, it's just hot air.

And as for your comment regarding subs and slaves, I disagree. Master assumes that I will obey. I don't choose whether I will obey every time he asks me to do something. If I don't obey, Master will deal with the situation as he sees fit. And if I suddenly decide not to submit, it is not okay. Matter of fact, if I suddenly decide that I won't submit then something is seriously wrong in our relationship and it should have been communicated.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to sweetgirlserves)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 10:04:22 AM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetgirlserves

DesFIP,
Seems from what you've posted in this thread and another one recently, you are always on the look out, concerned that your 'dom' might be 'fucking up'. If this is the case, then certainly, my definition would not apply. I am glad that you are intelligent enough to help the poor male you have submitted to from constantly making mistakes. He must be so very grateful to you.

~sgs

Golly, I haven't seen quite such a short-sighted and spiteful post for quite some time.

I must also have a *poor male* as he'd certainly NOT be patting me on the back if I kept my mouth shut while staring at an ice-berg looming out of the murk.

I can hear the words ringing in my ears..*Oh don't be so bloody daft!*. I thought it was down-to-earth common-sense.....not something to do with *doms* being legends in their own lunchtimes.

agirl

(in reply to sweetgirlserves)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 10:16:31 AM

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

not something to do with *doms* being legends in their own lunchtimes.

HAHA...now that is cute

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to agirl)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 10:21:59 AM

sweetgirlserves

Posts: 373
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline

Gee..

I give a simple answer of my opinion.

Then i am told in a rather mean-spirited way that "I might prefer fuckups"... and then that my definition is 'absolutely wrong'...

My definition is just that... my definition.

Each of us can define our relationship whatever way we like... and who really cares... as long as we are each happy in our relationships. Personally i think of M/s as a rather 'extreme' type of relationship. Communication, certainly, is key in ANY relationship. I have had a 19 year relationship... much of it successful, but it ended when the communication broke down over a period of time. So I do value communication. But at the same time, i think when you decide to go M/s over D/s or what have you, you are putting a whole other level of trust and authority into the 'M's" hands. But if every step of the way you are 'communicating', to get that 'M' to do everything exactly the way you want it done, then i say take a good hard look and ask yourself if that is really an M/s relationship.

To me HOH and M/s are similar, but not the same.... but who cares what i think. The only ones it really matters to are the two people involved.... and if they are happy and it is working for them... then *wonderful*.... the world would be a much better place if there were more happy and fulfilling relationships... whatever form/label etc... those may take.

I apologize for being a bit of a jerk.... i got offended and chose not to take the high road. Live and learn.

~sgs

_____________________________

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." ~Maya Angelou

(in reply to agirl)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 1:32:48 PM

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

Wow. Oh wow. i have seen so much spitefulness etc on these boards lately. i think the best way to put any personal definition or opinion forward is to just say "in my opinion......" Then Wwe don't come across as know-it-alls with the last word, which really none of Uus have. All that matters as far as sub vs slave definitions are concerned, anyway, is what it means to those in the relationship in question.

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to sweetgirlserves)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 2:35:54 PM

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
Status: offline

Actually just about everything that anyone posts is in their opinion. If more people understood that, there may be less conflict. I believe that some on these message boards see things in a post that may not be there because they are projecting something internally.

There are many topics though, where people are expressing how they feel it should be for everyone, and that just does not work. There are very, very few absolute things in life.

Sub = A person that often defers to someone with a dominant personality

Slave = Someone that is involved in some kind of power transfer relationship.

The degrees of both of these will vary from relationship to relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957

Wow. Oh wow. i have seen so much spitefulness etc on these boards lately. i think the best way to put any personal definition or opinion forward is to just say "in my opinion......" Then Wwe don't come across as know-it-alls with the last word, which really none of Uus have. All that matters as far as sub vs slave definitions are concerned, anyway, is what it means to those in the relationship in question.

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to sweetsub1957)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 3:33:57 PM

Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

Actually just about everything that anyone posts is in their opinion. If more people understood that, there may be less conflict.

When it comes to subjective issues, this is applicable. However, many topics are not wholly subjective and all "opinions" do not and should not get lumped into one box for the sake of intellectual equality.

Heck, despite the fact that people can call themselves and the relationships anything they want, some self-applied titles will be more incoherent than others.

Ironically, it occurs to me that one of the bigger issues of conflict is that people do defer to 'opinion', thereby rendering every silly opinion as having the entitlement to be just as correct as more sensible one...and reality doesn't quite work that way.

< Message edited by NihilusZero -- 6/18/2009 3:35:40 PM >

_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to OrionTheWolf)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 6:21:51 PM

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetgirlserves

DesFIP,
Seems from what you've posted in this thread and another one recently, you are always on the look out, concerned that your 'dom' might be 'fucking up'. If this is the case, then certainly, my definition would not apply. I am glad that you are intelligent enough to help the poor male you have submitted to from constantly making mistakes. He must be so very grateful to you.

~sgs

"D" types are not infallible and not omnipotent. My role is to make his life easier. If I don't point out a mistake coming down the road, then I've failed him.

Your post was rude. Beyond that, you're poking at someone that's been in the same D/s relationship for (if I remember correctly) for more than a decade.

The bottom line is that you can espose on what it is to be a submissive or slave, but unless you have the ability to make it work within a relationship, it's just hot air.

And as for your comment regarding subs and slaves, I disagree. Master assumes that I will obey. I don't choose whether I will obey every time he asks me to do something. If I don't obey, Master will deal with the situation as he sees fit. And if I suddenly decide not to submit, it is not okay. Matter of fact, if I suddenly decide that I won't submit then something is seriously wrong in our relationship and it should have been communicated.

Thanks Oside and agirl. I was out all day and missed this 'sweet' comment from the sweetgirl. Sounds like she needs a sugar fix.

Actually I don't think he's likely to fuck up, he does. He worries about too much power going to his head, making him so arrogant that he'll make bad decisions for those under his care. It is, in fact, one of the things that makes him such a good dominant, the fact that he knows he isn't divine.

I am not allowed to worship him or see him as superhuman. He made that very clear in the beginning. The problem with putting mere mortals on pedestals is that the clay feet will make them fall off every time. The solution was for him not to climb up there.

Our relationship is not quite a decade, we need a couple more years for that. But my respect for his abilities just grows, which includes my respect for him not thinking he is omniscient. It is because he knows he is fallible that he takes steps to avoid making mistakes. And sometimes those steps include having me give a less than flattering opinion.

Thankfully he isn't so insecure that being told he's missed something and needs to rethink the situation would threaten him.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to OsideGirl)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 6/18/2009 9:11:48 PM

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
Status: offline

Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes

"Culture decides what is truth, but truth, unfortunately for culture, is unaware of this."

quote:

ORIGINAL: NihilusZero
Ironically, it occurs to me that one of the bigger issues of conflict is that people do defer to 'opinion', thereby rendering every silly opinion as having the entitlement to be just as correct as more sensible one...and reality doesn't quite work that way.

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to NihilusZero)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/1/2009 2:24:10 PM

Posts: 1
Joined: 9/10/2008
Status: offline

This is the first time i have commented on a topic here. i have a favorite quote which is as follows.. "a submissive will ponder while a slave will say Yes Master"

(in reply to Asherdelampyr)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/1/2009 4:12:11 PM

Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

What is the difference between a sub and slave?

A slave is a girl who delights in serving me, subjecting herself to my control.

A submissive is a girl who's above all that--she just happens to like to serve and give up control.

Yeah, I know. Just don't tell her she's a slave, and all will be well.

(in reply to PETschmetterling)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/1/2009 5:13:12 PM

Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline

quote:

Yeah, I know. Just don't tell her she's a slave, and all will be well.

LMAO!

_____________________________

"MotherFUCKER!" is NOT a safeword!!"- Steel
"We've had complaints about 'orgy noises'. This is not the neighborhood for that kind of thing"- PVE Cop

Resident "Hypnotic Eyes", "Cleavage" and "Toy Whore"
Subby Mafia, VAA Posse & Team Troll!

(in reply to Musicmystery)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/7/2009 4:51:16 PM

Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline

a sub is a submissive. a slave is a slave.

a slave is a sub that is owned, collared, or considered property.

a slave is submissive to its master.

a sub is submissive in nature and may never go on to be an owned slave

(in reply to PETschmetterling)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/7/2009 5:24:16 PM

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Here are the two most common definitions...

I own slaves but everyone else just has submissives

My submission is complete and total, therefore I am a slave unlike those other bitches

hahaha Too funny!!!

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/7/2009 10:57:48 PM

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PETschmetterling

I hate to ask what may seem like a stupid question but I'm fairly new to the entire BDSM scene and I'm just unsure since I thought the terms could be used interchangably but does not seem to really be the case. What is the difference between a sub and slave?

A question that has as many different answers as there are people on this board. Simply you need to focus on the individual and if they meet your needs, if they do, then she could call herself ultimate partner, which in my eyes, is better match than either of the previously mentioned terms

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to PETschmetterling)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/8/2009 6:24:02 AM

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cincin

This is the first time i have commented on a topic here. i have a favorite quote which is as follows.. "a submissive will ponder while a slave will say Yes Master"

That does sound real nice. Of course when I compare it to the submissives and slaves I have know in real life, it's bull shit, but it does sound nice. I am not sure why people try to make slaves out to be something more than submissives, but from reading the forums, they do. Personally I have met many "slaves" who could of learned a lot about serving from the "subs" in the community, but that is what they and their masters decided to call them. My ex roommate was a "slave" to 2 mistress when I was living with him. He was lazy and did anything he could to avoid work, including lieing on a regular basis, but they called him their slave. Didn't change his personality any to have that label, but it made them feel good, so I guess that is all that matters.

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert

This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to cincin)

RE: Sub vs. Slave - 9/8/2009 9:15:52 AM

Posts: 15
Joined: 9/4/2009
Status: offline

fr

a slave needs a Master .
sub needs a Dom.

imo...

it is degree of control given over to another, the voice they are allowed to have within the dynamic...how limits are set etc

< Message edited by stillholdson -- 9/8/2009 9:19:09 AM >

_____________________________

"you will come to understand my ways and accept them as your fate"~Master SF~

(in reply to sweetgirlserves)

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Sub vs. Slave

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

2.438