RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 5:50:13 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I fail to see why the answer has to be any more complicated than just by asking him. If it is ok for him to be asking not to meet with you until after your period and a check up with a doctor, in other words, making his intentions for a sexual adventure well known, why should it be such a big deal to ask him if he's seeing anyone else?

Please do Me one huge favor though. When 'he never wants us to be apart' turns into 'we had casual sex and now he doesn't reply to emails,' could you spare us? There are plenty of threads already out there with the theme.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to monaslave)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 5:55:46 AM

kallisto

Posts: 1185
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel

I don't keep track (CM has that nifty read forum post thing on profiles) so when somthing just seems really similar to what i have seen before or i just can't put my finger on why something seems familiat, i just hit the view posts lol on their profile and either it shows what i was thinking about, or not. I just am trying to get a handle on if this is a new guy erm old guy or if its the same guy she was upset with a month ago because of what he was doing or expecting in the relationship.

Exactly what I was thinking when I read it last night. Seemed like I had seen something resembling this very thing before. Glad it wasn't only me that had the "been there, done that before" feeling.

(in reply to barelynangel)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 6:49:44 AM

LATEXBABY64

Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline

forsure trust your gut be honest and open if you find a dom domme or sub that lies run cuase they could hurt you in a lot of ways
there are good i mean good quality people out there. Take the time to look do not rush. no matter how much you want someone or something making a bad choice is something that always takes away from what you can bring to the table. Remeber to not fallow The i am only human concept. When people manipulate or have to lie to get something or hide no one wins. That way of thinking is for stupid cluless sheep people. Be more then human be better then make good choices life will rock :)

(in reply to kallisto)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 11:29:45 AM

tolovetolaugh

Posts: 648
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline

Whenever I get suspicious about such I just put in a lil paragraph along the lines of if I ever did find out they lied and were married/in a relationship, I would see to it that their "other" would find out about "us".
A lot of those I am suspicious of seem to disappear at this point.

Then I go back to trying not to scare away the cute lil Dom before I can lure them completely in.

_____________________________

That which yields, is not always weak. —
Jacqueline Carey (Kushiel's Dart)

I wrote a porn!
http://www.collarchat.com/m_3840531

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 11:49:47 AM

TEMPERANCE

Posts: 126
Joined: 8/22/2006
Status: offline

Maybe hes out having a life at the weekend? Im very single and Im hardly ever online at the weekends, only if im killing time waiting for my friends before i go out.... its a bit strange hes saying he never wants to leave you yet you havent even spoken on the phone let alone met yet....

_____________________________

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/thecruelhuntress

http://www.cruelhuntress.proboards.com

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 11:59:35 AM

Prinsexx

Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

I had a relationship once..with a guy i met on line and converted it to real time. He called. We spoke. He lived about 2 hours away. He called actually two or three times a week. Camr over to see me and converted my birthday to a real Cinderella night. He was dominant and assertive and (up to that point in my life0 the best sex i had ever had. We saw each other about every two to three weeks. He mailed all day everyday and called two or three times a week. He sent pics of his ex wife, their children, his son;s college graduation, his extension, his house and garden. His surname i searched and it fitted the address he had given me.
I don't know why i got suspicious. After about three years the time he spent with me grew intermiittent and a pattern developed. It became every three weeks exactly and only on Thursday nights. One day, out of the blue, I keyed in his ex wifes name and his son's name into the Electoral Register on-line.
It cost me about £300 and finally I located the ex wife and wrote to her.
I heard nothing for about 6 months so I assumed it has been the wrong person.
Then one day I received an email from someone matching the 20 year old's son's name. It said that he so mistrusted his father that he thought the letter from me to his mother was a ficiton. Anyway he said the name I had called his father by was right only in surname. He knew his father by a different first name and his mom called him again by a different first name.
I verified myself ny all the letterheads I could muster and ads in Yellow Pages and asked the son to call me. We spoke.
The one thing that his father, this man I had brought into my home, whom I had been with for almost four years? The one thing this man had left out was the fact that he was livng with a woman all along. The son said; they have a committed relationship so he thought.
When I told the son how much I had been told about him (thinking he was in close relationship with his father) he was utterly shocked.
There was a past. When I got my 'lover's' actual name and searched that on the electoral register he trned out to be living at an entirely different address.
It wa sthen that the bad shit hit the fan. He threatened me. He stalked me. He threatened to out me and my bdsm to my emplyers and so and so on until in the end I made a statement to the Polic and they went round to his house and cautioned him.
As for the live in girl friend/ The house turned out to be in her name. We spoke. She said i could have him if i wanted as the relationship had been on the rocks for a few years.
Tough titty.
I don't do dishonesty no matter how amazing the bdsm or sex.
Even if it takes me years to find out what the truth actually is.
And the truth is?
How do you tell?
You just don;t sometimes. You just don't.

_____________________________

Owner of asterion

Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
Free woman
Resident thread finisher
To my stalker:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2lP_7J7GI&feature=fvwrel

(in reply to monaslave)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 12:33:41 PM

LovingMistress45

Posts: 271
Joined: 2/7/2009
Status: offline

It sounds to me like you are rushing or being rushed. He wants you forever, but won't meet for coffee? It has be after your period is over and you have been to the doctor, and then it has to be at your place. You gave him your phone # but he didn't offer his? You are worried if you ask him questions he will be upset, yet you are willing to have him at your home?

I am not taking a judgmental road as I have met men in my time without having talked to them on the phone and I have in the past met them for the purpose of bdsm play and sex. However, I didn't delude myself that is was anything more than that. If you are really buying his he wants you forever line, you are setting yourself up to be disappointed. If you want a night or weekend of sex and play with no other expectations go for it, but don't think it will be more. If he really wanted to get to know you he would call you, he would meet you for coffee and frankly your period wouldn't be an issue in a first meeting because he would not just be wanting you in bed. As to whether he is married/involved who knows, he may be completely single and still just wanting some kinky sex.

(in reply to Prinsexx)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 12:46:34 PM

FawneTwo

Posts: 98
Status: offline

Is there such a creature as a dishonest dog?

The tone of this thread screeches like nails on a chalkboard

and puts one in mind of hystericAL BUNNIE BOILERS.

(in reply to Prinsexx)

Profile

Post #: 48

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 1:11:26 PM

MARAA

Posts: 38
Joined: 2/27/2009
Status: offline

He doesnt know where I live,he only know,what city and so do I, and I decided to myself long ago that he wont get my adress if I dont get his. because it has to be fair.
otherwise I probably wont get it or at least hard to ask for it and its also the appropriate time. Actually.. its always been him pushing me for a relationship,and its him talking about how much he wants me and doesnt want it to end etc,it has never been me, I have always tried talk sence to him

I dont mind play for a day or whatever,I just want to KNOW before hand thanx. But I dont go around making big plans in my mind for a future together, when Idont know hows it going to be. So in that case Im realistic. its just him that continues. I dont know how many times hes swore to me he never leaves me,but I have never told him so. And I wont have sex with him either unless he also can prove to me hes clean because of the logic in it right. but its true,he really rush and push all time. Hes even talked about making a pact/agreement we never can break. it was me talking to him taking it slow.
I agree with the facial expression.. everybody can lie over internet so even if he says no,how would I know.
well like I said we knew eachother short last time.

(in reply to FawneTwo)

Profile

Post #: 49

RE: married/in relationship-how do you tell? - 6/20/2009 1:25:20 PM

FawneTwo

Posts: 98
Status: offline

MARAA - Good luck and have fun! Wishing you both well

(in reply to MARAA)

Profile

Post #: 50