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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 1:41:06 PM   
scarlethiney


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You're taking the piss now.

NO ... it's about arguably disgustingly defamatory comments made in public.

It's not a disagreement either, I have extended the opportunity for that to be cleared up.

Where does this relate to US/UK stuff? Are you making an issue of that?

Pirate



Sigh, no you did. It is my unfortunate mistake to not include your previous quote: (actually Bita did (thank you Bita) and I did not see it until after posting this.)

quote:

It really makes me laugh how so many US citizens EXPECT foreigners to play by their rules all the time, now THAT ... ...
is ignorant.

No, actually making such a broad reference about the "many" is ignorant and so unnecessary. You Pirate accuse so many of spitefulness and snarky comments and yet refuse to look at your own nasty remarks to others on this thread. 




< Message edited by scarlethiney -- 8/10/2009 1:54:17 PM >


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 1:53:21 PM   
MoGa


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quote:

ORIGINAL: JonnieBoy

You have cm mail


Replied

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 1:55:34 PM   
MoGa


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quote:

ORIGINAL: beargonewild

quote:

ORIGINAL: MoGa

I have to disagree with you here bear. Prin DID say that her daughter was a prick tease. She also called her daughter "Some slut of a prick tease". Those are HER words. She didnt say her daughter was ACTING like one.
 


That was an oversight on my part MoGa, my apology to you. The point I had hoped to get across is most if not all parents will call their offspring an unflattering name when we had totally exasperated them. I still recall my parents calling me a "goddamn asshole" on a few occasions and "you stupid son of a bitch." What should be clarified is these names are thrown at us offspring during a moment of anger/frustration/disgust which is usually over a bad judgement on our part and we had refused to listen to what our parents are trying to get through our head.



*Hugs*
But do these parents who call their kids names in private, come on a public forum and call their children names for the whole world to view?  Just sayin...

MoGa

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 2:37:49 PM   
JonnieBoy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: scarlethiney

No, actually making such a broad reference about the "many" is ignorant and so unnecessary. You Pirate accuse so many of spitefulness and snarky comments and yet refuse to look at your own nasty remarks to others on this thread. 



Nasty, to someone who wasn't nasty to me first? ... on this thread ... qoute me back then (elsewhere 'cause it's off topic I think)

Pirate

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 2:38:10 PM   
beargonewild


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MoGa.......I can't speak for other parents though mine did call me those names in the home and out in public. 

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 2:45:36 PM   
LaTigresse


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Because others have done it does not make it right.

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 2:59:32 PM   
beargonewild


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In regards to what I related regarding to my parents, whether they were right or wrong in their actions, my opinion my parents may have thought they were right. 

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 3:42:54 PM   
LaTigresse


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Just because someone believes they are right, does not make it so.

There is a difference, in my world, in telling someone to stop behaving like a slut prick tease because they are better than that, or telling them they ARE a slut prick tease.

Behaving like, or are. Two different things. One tears down, the other encourages better.


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 3:52:08 PM   
beargonewild


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I don't dispute what you are stating, I was simply stating a part of my own experience with my own family in a non condemning/judging way. 

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 3:52:16 PM   
LadyPact


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Again, still not reading all of the replies, so if this is a repeat, please pass it by.

Prin, if you were this girl's therapist or other health professional, instead of her mother, what would you do then?


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 3:58:50 PM   
Prinsexx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Again, still not reading all of the replies, so if this is a repeat, please pass it by.

Prin, if you were this girl's therapist or other health professional, instead of her mother, what would you do then?




I would talk to her for 55 minutes according to some psychological approach and then write up the notes. I would be guarded, dispassionate and give her therapy for as long as the money held out.
Edited to respell psychological approach just in case someone truly believes i can't spell it.


< Message edited by Prinsexx -- 8/10/2009 4:05:07 PM >


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 4:05:44 PM   
LadyPact


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In certain fields here, one is required by law to report physical abuse.

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 4:39:38 PM   
barelynangel


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quote:

So from what all you are saying here is that Prin should not relate her assessment of her daughter...thus implying she doesn't know her daughter at all? I mean this is a mother who has raised her daughter since infancy and seems to me that Prin should have a bloody good idea what the personality traits/characteristics of her own offspring!


No that's not what i am saying what i am saying is the concept of BEING A SUBMISSIVE ON THIS SITE is a conscious decision and acknowledgement by an individual --- i have see PRINNSEX say her daughter is a submissive but i have seen no indication her daughter is actually consciously exploring the CONCEPT of being a submissive that goes with this SITE.   What i am saying is if Prinnsex isn't going to MAKE decisions like calling the police for her daughter who got beat up -- she shouldn't be labeling her so she can use that as a concept the rationality.  You can't have it both ways.  Its up to her daughter -- the adult from what i understand -- to decide if this LIFESTYLE is something she identifies with NOT her mother.

angel

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 4:43:02 PM   
JonnieBoy


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Which would be great if it happened in practice here too, unfortunately it does not, therefore there can be repercussions for those who actually "take it upon themselves" to report, sad innit?

Pirate

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 4:47:48 PM   
barelynangel


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Pirate i have no desire to speak with you off the boards.  However, regarding your silly legal threat from earlier there is someting i didn't have time to touch on but kept niggling at my mind because it should have been the first thing that came to mind -- first of all, you are not PERSONALLY identified in her statement A NICKNAME on a message board is therefore, saying something TO A NICKNAME on a message board AND if she doesn't know who you are OFFLINE and your identification -- again, its hard to defame a nickname from online that has no real identification on it.  Secondly, you would have to be able to ACTUALLY IDENTIFY the person posting and since most nicknames on this board do NOT give personal information and in fact its against the TOS, you have no way of identifying who actually wrote that post to you. In order to do a complaint while you can use John Doe, an ISP and the personal information of same would not be able to tell you which person actually typed the statement to you IF the statement could be seen as defamatory -- which it isn't.  This whole thread could easily be spun as MANY have taken it to a jury - a woman who allowed her teenage daughter get beat up and instead of calling the police she uses her lifestyle to make excuses for her daughters behavior of acceptance.  (THIS IS NOT WHAT I THINK BTW) but it could easily be used in court because of MANY of the posts and based upon what the OP has said herself about the situation.  Your defense of the OP and many of your posts could easily be used against you and interpreted as the quote you have issue with.  So again, your legal threat is just plain silly,. 

So again -- you really need new legal counsel.

But just a thought perhaps your legal adviser can be constructive and perhaps find some legal things that Prinnsex can use or help her daughter use so this doesn't happen again.  As most of us don't know UK law, only people in the UK can set up a system wherein this can be least likely to occur again and have legal concepts in place in case it does.  If you have then your legal adviser has done good despite his personal legal advise (based upon what you have written and implied).


angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 8/10/2009 4:53:28 PM >


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 5:05:59 PM   
beargonewild


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quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel

quote:

So from what all you are saying here is that Prin should not relate her assessment of her daughter...thus implying she doesn't know her daughter at all? I mean this is a mother who has raised her daughter since infancy and seems to me that Prin should have a bloody good idea what the personality traits/characteristics of her own offspring!


No that's not what i am saying what i am saying is the concept of BEING A SUBMISSIVE ON THIS SITE is a conscious decision and acknowledgement by an individual --- i have see PRINNSEX say her daughter is a submissive but i have seen no indication her daughter is actually consciously exploring the CONCEPT of being a submissive that goes with this SITE.   What i am saying is if Prinnsex isn't going to MAKE decisions like calling the police for her daughter who got beat up -- she shouldn't be labeling her so she can use that as a concept the rationality.  You can't have it both ways.  Its up to her daughter -- the adult from what i understand -- to decide if this LIFESTYLE is something she identifies with NOT her mother.

angel


Yet it still boils down to the fact Prin is the parent so it is logical and accurate to say that she will have a definite idea on the personality traits her own offspring has. Thus by her definition of traits of a submissive person, she is applying those definitions to similar traits she sees in her daughter.


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 5:06:28 PM   
CallaFirestormBW


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~Fr~ (Yes, I know I'm late getting around to here).

I have a daughter the same age as yours, Prin, and another a year younger. I also have two sons on either side of them. I swear to all that is real and sound in the world, if one of my kids' companions (male or female, as one of the girls is decidedly bi) -dared- to pull what your daughter's boyfriend is doing, xhe would be sitting in the back of a squad car in about as fast as I could dial the cell... and I would report it the very FIRST time xhe damaged my girl. If one of my offspring dared to do that to another human being, much -less- one that xhe was dating, except in self-defense, I would march hir little ass down to the police station and turn hir in myself! (I did it with my brother, when I caught him battering his wife).

Today must be my day for being straight-from-the-spleen, so I'm not going to pull any punches. You have a responsibility as a -parent- here. Your offspring is clearly still depending on YOU for boundaries, as she feels unable to set them for herself. Get off your bloomin' butt and defend your child! Slap that idiot in jail, call him up on charges with his chain of command. Get pictures of your daughter and roll his hiney straight to the cleaners! He is an abusive, manipulative ass, and if you don't let your daughter know now that, regardless of her orientation she deserves better than abuse, then in 10 years, you'll find that she is suffering and is so deeply in there is no way you can extricate her -- and on top of that, she will have lost all faith in your capacity to advise or assist her in any way.

Dame Calla



< Message edited by CallaFirestormBW -- 8/10/2009 5:07:26 PM >


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 5:18:41 PM   
barelynangel


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quote:

Yet it still boils down to the fact Prin is the parent so it is logical and accurate to say that she will have a definite idea on the personality traits her own offspring has. Thus by her definition of traits of a submissive person, she is applying those definitions to similar traits she sees in her daughter.


A person can be submissive nature and NEVER EVER even know about BDSM. And sure the heck never use being A SUBMISSIVE (noun) to make excuses as to why she lets some guy (who again we are waiting to see if the kid identifies as a DOM, MASTER, TOP what not) do what he did.  I could care less what Prinnsex thinks of her daughter and her personality --- SHE CANNOT AND SHOULD NOT be looking at her daughter in BDSM identifications UNLESS the daughter actually identifies as same.  If she doesn't then the OP is looking at her daughter out of context to what she actually is.  And therefore, she may be seeing a submissive who is having growning pains into her being a submissive instead of an abused victim who needs help before she continues a cycle of abuse that may get her killed.

If her daughter actually entered into an experiment of being a submissive to a dom -- okay i could see a discussin from that -- but that's not what i see -- i see a mom into BDSM who is looking at her daughter who isn't in a context she sshouldn't be because it could give her blinders to a bigger issue.   Prinnsex cannot make this decision for her daughter to rationalize what she is doing because what she her daughter is doing is too fold she could be spreading her submissive wings of BDSM or she could be simply an abused woman.

Think of it in reverse -- say Prinnsex's daughter identified as a submissive but because Prinnsex didn't understand it she instead identified her daughter as a victim of abuse because she knows that instead of the concept of being a submissive.  Its the same thing.  Until SHE identifies as a submissive (noun) she is not one and should not be compared to the concept of BDSM submission.

angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 8/10/2009 5:23:13 PM >


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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 5:31:53 PM   
hizgeorgiapeach


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I haven't read ALL of the replies, but I did read many of them after reading the inital post.  What I'm going to say isn't Polite.  It isn't politically correct feel good pat on the head bullshit, either - it's a 100% honest opinion, unedited, and frankly you gave up your right to complain if the opinions given here aren't what you Want to hear the instant you posted, so no kvetching or whining.
 
Being spineless and STUPID doesn't make someone "submissive" - it only makes them Spineless and STUPID.
 
Teenagers aren't exactly known for their Maturity, or their Experience to show them what Stupidity certain actions are.  They rely on US - their PARENTS - to protect them from their lack of experience.  Suck it up, quit trying to be her FRIEND, and START ACTING LIKE A FUCKING PARENT RATHER THAN A SPINELESS WHINING FOREVER VICTIM.
 
He is not dominant, and She is NOT submissive.  He is an Abuser and she is his victim, flat out, and you're LETTING HIM ABUSE HER without doing anything about it.  Being submissive doesn't automatically mean allowing yourself to be abused - and if that's what you've been taught (or I should say Brainwashed Into Believing) - then you haven't got the first clue what being Submissive is, regardless of what you Call yourself.
 
Throw the fucker in Jail, and if you can't make yourself do that, then find someone with sufficient backbone to act like an Adult when dealing with Children, and give the BOY the assbusting he deserves.  (Personally,  I doubt you have the backbone to do more than wring your hands together moaning until he kills your daughter, then ask "how could it happen?")

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RE: Young submission and its consequences - 8/10/2009 5:48:49 PM   
CaringandReal


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I'm late to the party here, 300 posts, wow.


quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally


First of all I do not see how you can use submission to manipulate it is a contradiction in terms.



I don't feel competent to comment on the very thorny issue that gave birth to this remark, so I won't. I do have a response to this comment, in isolation of the issue, however.

To me it's not a contradiction, although in an ideal world it would be. It's just another form of topping from the bottom or pussywhipping. In some relationships, the "submissive" notices that the "dominant" has become addicted to or very needful of the submissive treatment, the calling him master, the doting on his every whim, the kinky sex any time he wants it, the public display of meekness and subservience, and then threatens, sometimes quite subtlty, to remove all that or lessen it if he does or commands anything that really displeases her. The really good manipulators do not make overt threats, they just make it clear to "master" that they will be very unhappy if certain things occur, and master, if he doesn't have much of a drive to control, will often cave. And both can often maintain the illusion under this dynamic that they are master and slave.

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