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Breaking - 3/2/2006 1:36:06 AM   
xxfemslavexx


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Joined: 1/2/2006
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What does a slave do, when her new Master insists she needs breaking and remolding? She has given up her limits totally, and he feels he can do anything at all. Any ideas on this please?
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 2:03:49 AM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
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Well considering you have given up your limits..whats there to do? (tongue in cheek there)

If its just a fantasy..have fun with it.

If its reality...
you shouldnt be with someone you dont trust implicitly.

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 3:29:25 AM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
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If you submitted an trust him and given up your limits, then allow hime the right to mold you. Afterall to have submitted to him as a slave you trust him with your life ...correct?????

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 4:01:58 AM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
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Breaking? what does he mean by breaking? I would have him define that first if it sounds like he means brainwashing to turn you into mindless robot, Id suggest hitting the road and finding a new Master. If he means training you in ways to please him thats normal. Also I think if he's suggesting you have no safeword, you may want to look elsewhere unless your a true masochist. I don't suggest giving up limits, some people have some wild ideas so unless you trust him without question..be prepared for anything.

Lashra

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 4:59:35 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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Breaking.... First heard that term from a dick head claimimg to be a dog trainer.. I've had the pleasure of spending time with some great Horse, dog and other animal trainers over the decades.. never once did they break the spirit of an animal, they nurchered it and coaxed it into new directions... best example was a now dead 'Nam Vet who worked with Bears and with his favourite Grizzly, I was able to sleep using the Bear as a pillow. (Talk about trust..)

Break a girl, a kajira? No way known. I will retrain her to my spoecifications that is all. Use all she knows and refocus it as I desire but break? Never. To my mind Breakers of animals and people are just vandals and destructive juviniles who have got older but not wiser.......

< Message edited by IronBear -- 3/2/2006 5:00:24 AM >


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to Lashra)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 5:18:37 AM   
barelynangel


Posts: 6233
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First of all, if she is only realizing what his expectations are of his mastery of her AFTER the collar is attached, i would say their communication was lacking or she wasn't listening before the collar. Lesson learned, if she feels she is a victim now, then she should leave. Most Men i know don't insist either they just do. That to me is a big indicator of who has the control and if he understands his own ability to master, he won't argue with her, he won't insist, he won't make an issue of it, he will just do. She will either submit to his way of life or she will run.

Breaking of a slave could mean many things, to some it means literally breaking her down its usually very intense, very physical, very mental interrogation type of idea where he spends days of "breaking her". Then he starts training her to his preferences and pleasures. Breaking also could be along the lines of breaking through barriers she has to truly grasp the slave within and draw her out to where she herself revels in what she truly is a slave this is more of a revelation type of idea because the mental intensity to the woman is a rcognition that makes her fly. Also Master Ironbears definition is a major one used also. Many times its a badass word used with a far different definition than the word actually implies. To some its simply a "word" that means he will start to mold her to his pleasures.. and perhaps break her of some bad habits as well as other definitions If she is collared to him, she should know already which definition he lives under.

A slave has limits, she just doesn't have her own. And yes, her becoming a slave to him means she understands he is "allowed" to do anything to her. (If she feels he will use this irresponsibly then my advice is don't decide to cry victim because of your own stupidity of not knowing the Man you are giving yourself into, simply walk away.) Most men i know who own slaves tend to do as they wish, they just don't do it irresponsibly, but they also realize enslavement is a process that requires time to achieve a final result he is looking for... As a slave she has two choices.. 1) remember she has put herself in his hands to do with as he pleases and believe he will do so responsibly or 2) she runs. I find many slaves tend to forget to do one thing talk to the MAN, instead they come to places like this asking for advice from people who are not part of the situation and she then becomes some icon of victim. It sounds like their communication was lacking before the collar and is continuing to be lacking thereafter. If she can't open her mouth and talk to him, then she should leave because as the enslavement progresses things will at times get intense and unsure and confusing at times. If she cannot communicate with him, then she is in for a very rough ride.

If she wanted to control the relationship and what conditions he could master her under.. she should have made it clear to him before she agreed to be collared as a slave.

I am sure others have very different ideas.. but this is a slave's opinion.

angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 3/2/2006 5:30:26 AM >


_____________________________


What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson


(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 5:59:36 AM   
littleone35


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Joined: 2/17/2005
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Breaking i am not sure that is a good term. Breaking is what you do with a horse not a slave. I don't know why your new Master wants a "broken slave" that is what training is for. I also have a new Master and he is not trying to break and remold me he is however training me to serve him in what he likes. I am sure you like or maybe even love your Master but i am not sure if trying to break you is a good idea. That is just my thoughts on your post.

Matt's littleone

< Message edited by littleone35 -- 3/2/2006 6:00:02 AM >

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 6:24:38 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone35
Breaking i am not sure that is a good term. Breaking is what you do with a horse not a slave. I don't know why your new Master wants a "broken slave" that is what training is for. I also have a new Master and he is not trying to break and remold me he is however training me to serve him in what he likes. I am sure you like or maybe even love your Master but i am not sure if trying to break you is a good idea. That is just my thoughts on your post.

Matt's littleone

Lots of people need breaking, or at least breaking of lots of bad habits. I had to break my local partner of a LOT of things before we could become serious together.

Some doms also have a "break and remold" fetish thing going as well. The reality is that breaking someone down and bringing them up again is a huge time and energy intensive operation that few have the skill and ability to do well.

But breaking someone down and building them up is certainly possible, and in some cases beneficial.


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 6:52:18 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel


Breaking of a slave could mean many things, to some it means literally breaking her down its usually very intense, very physical, very mental interrogation type of idea where he spends days of "breaking her". Then he starts training her to his preferences and pleasures. Breaking also could be along the lines of breaking through barriers she has to truly grasp the slave within and draw her out to where she herself revels in what she truly is a slave this is more of a revelation type of idea because the mental intensity to the woman is a rcognition that makes her fly. Also Master Ironbears definition is a major one used also. Many times its a badass word used with a far different definition than the word actually implies. To some its simply a "word" that means he will start to mold her to his pleasures.. and perhaps break her of some bad habits as well as other definitions If she is collared to him, she should know already which definition he lives under.
angel


barelynangel: your post hit it dead-on for me. All of it. This particular definition of "break" is how i understand it to be from my own experience, although Master has never used the term breaking. He defined it as stripping away my baggage and barriers. A gradual, difficult, and rewarding process, which had a "grand finale" to get to the final barriers.

Communication is so critical. If there is guess-work or uncertainty, there will be problems and such barriers will linger rather than dissolved.


(in reply to barelynangel)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 7:27:34 AM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
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how new??
yuour limits have become his limits or totwlly no limits for either?
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxfemslavexx

What does a slave do, when her new Master insists she needs breaking and remolding? She has given up her limits totally, and he feels he can do anything at all. Any ideas on this please?



_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 1:19:58 PM   
Vancouver_cinful


Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel
Breaking of a slave could mean many things, to some it means literally breaking her down its usually very intense, very physical, very mental interrogation type of idea where he spends days of "breaking her". Then he starts training her to his preferences and pleasures. Breaking also could be along the lines of breaking through barriers she has to truly grasp the slave within and draw her out to where she herself revels in what she truly is a slave this is more of a revelation type of idea because the mental intensity to the woman is a rcognition that makes her fly. Also Master Ironbears definition is a major one used also. Many times its a badass word used with a far different definition than the word actually implies. To some its simply a "word" that means he will start to mold her to his pleasures.. and perhaps break her of some bad habits as well as other definitions
angel


This is a good point. Breaking can simply mean breaking down the walls people often erect as a form of social acceptance. Personally, as someone who has been raised to be stalwart and forever smiling, breaking me of the need to hide my deeper feelings is a healthy goal - when undertaken with a trusted partner.

Without a more specific definition of what this dom means by breaking I'm personally unable to form an opinion on whether this is a positive step or a red flag...

It's one of those words (like gift ::giggle::) that can bring up very emotional reactions...

Cin


< Message edited by Vancouver_cinful -- 3/2/2006 1:21:58 PM >


_____________________________

Cin

quote:


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(in reply to barelynangel)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 3:42:14 PM   
mossy


Posts: 189
Joined: 2/21/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxfemslavexx

What does a slave do, when her new Master insists she needs breaking and remolding? She has given up her limits totally, and he feels he can do anything at all. Any ideas on this please?


i am inclined to agree with Vancouver_cinful. Yet it is obvious that the breaking of bad habits would not be your master's definition. He at least by this statement has made it clear, you have some changes coming your way for your life. To what extent He seeks to change you, that answer can only be sought from Him. As others have said the Trust issue is paramount i personally feel if you are to deal with this kind of slavery. For as Lucky Albatross has said few have the skill and ability to this this well.
my suggestion would be talking. Find out exactly what your 'masters meaning' of "breaking" is. Most of all what will He do if you voice to Him, that emotionally it is not going well for you? That i feel will be most important. i did not personally have a good experience with "breaking". Yet i can see, if done correctly, right time right place, right person, it could be positively life altering.

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 4:12:35 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxfemslavexx

What does a slave do, when her new Master insists she needs breaking and remolding? She has given up her limits totally, and he feels he can do anything at all. Any ideas on this please?



BE VERY CAREFUL!!!! I have known slaves that have the impression and desire that they need breaking and remolding. I think it is important to truly understand what does breaking actually mean. There can be a fine line between breaking down a person and destroying!!! It has been my experience that very very very few Master's actually have the skills and understanding to do this type of action... unfortunately more that a few think that they have more than they have.

Breaking a specific behavior or fear/aniexty is something I have done and will do... but... going to a more general or wide spread idea of breaking is not something I would entertain. I would also suggest that no one entertains such thoughts unless at a minimum this person has alot of educational training/education in human behaviors and/or psychology.

This is not small stuff... I would also suggest that if a breaking of any degree is required... the submissive is very strong in supporting this approach! NOT JUST submitting to it! But, wanting it whole heartedly!

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 4:33:13 PM   
MTslave


Posts: 153
Joined: 12/15/2005
Status: offline
When I first read this my very first thought was, 'how does one become a slave and then start worrying about what is and what is not'. It seems rather fool hearty to me in my opinion to step into such a relationship without all these things having been discussed first. I would simply suggest that if you are having these thoughts, doubts, questions, or any anything that is causing you to worry, you should perhaps back up a few steps... slow down... then start again with the knowledge first not last.

MTs slave


_____________________________

Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk everything, you risk even more.”- Erica Jong

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 3/2/2006 6:06:41 PM   
sanita


Posts: 338
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline
My thoughts on hearing that exact wording are that i would be concermed. Before i ever even thought about being with my Master even in a first time play situation, W/we had this discussion.

The phrase "I do not break my toys." was very reassuring to me.

Now, xxfemslavexx, your profile says you are very experienced. i take it you mean in this lifestyle? What are your thoughts on this? my assumption is that experience is what helps us watch our step. Did you know what you were signing up for with this collar?

No criticism intended. i, myself, often wonder "What am i getting into?!?" but then i figure it out... and it is pretty great.


_____________________________

Sometimes, He calls me "subbie." Sometimes, i call me "subbie." And if someone wants to call me a BBW, its flattering. Just don't call me false.

"Please do not show me your ass and expect me to read your mind." -Opencollar

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 5/23/2006 5:57:57 PM   
TedEbear


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Joined: 4/21/2006
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deletted

< Message edited by TedEbear -- 5/23/2006 6:00:36 PM >

(in reply to KnightofMists)
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RE: Breaking - 5/23/2006 5:59:45 PM   
TedEbear


Posts: 35
Joined: 4/21/2006
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I saw a movie years ago were some pro domme was bragging that she could break any guy in a hour. and that two hours with her would be fatal. I doubt she intended that she would rebuild him. You have any ideas as to want she may have meant? Clueless and wondering?

(in reply to sanita)
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RE: Breaking - 5/23/2006 7:12:32 PM   
desertdancer


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Joined: 5/12/2006
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I think you've had great advise so far, what I would advise you to do is look inside and decide if this is something that is scarey to you or just feels wrong, then i would isolate what points feel wrong to you..is it his desire to 'break you' or mold you..or that maybe your limits arnt being heard, whatever it is that is off putting to you, then I would talk to him, respectfully and tell him what yoyr concerns are and why you feel that way and I would ask for some clarification as to his defination of breaking you.  I would aslo decide what my limits are, if they are hard limits and if I were willing to compromise them.  If He is going beyond what you are wanting or needing and will not adjust to the needs of you, then maybe I would look elsewhere...depends if love was involved or not.

I wish you luck and well being

~dancer

(in reply to TedEbear)
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RE: Breaking - 5/23/2006 7:19:22 PM   
VvShadowspawnvV


Posts: 218
Joined: 3/27/2006
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"What does a slave do, when her new Master insists she needs breaking and remolding? She has given up her limits totally, and he feels he can do anything at all. Any ideas on this please?"
 
The problem with the above statement is the "he feels"... Unless you BOTH feel that he can do anything he pleases, (or both set limits, i suppose) this won't work. =/

Best of luck with this.

becca

Had to edit to say i didn't realize this thread was so old- it was at the top.  =)

< Message edited by VvShadowspawnvV -- 5/23/2006 7:20:28 PM >

(in reply to xxfemslavexx)
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RE: Breaking - 5/23/2006 7:32:17 PM   
fastlane


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Joined: 5/26/2005
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I'm only good at broken hearts....is that what he broke?
If so...take a trip to the video store, rent a bunch of movies, buy lots of ice cream and popcorn and anything else that is bad for you, don't shave your legs, go in to your room...and have fun.
Works for me! Kevin

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to VvShadowspawnvV)
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