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RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 11:18:25 AM   
subm24uk


Posts: 1
Joined: 3/12/2006
Status: offline
quote:

I'm willing


Surely it begs the question: Is it 'forced' bi if you are willing?

(in reply to sublace)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 11:20:42 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		i don't want any man within 100-feet of me...espeically naked. i most certainly will NOT stuck on one either...no matter how much any Mistress may want it...not in this or any lifetime...regardless of what gender i am.

_____________________________

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(in reply to alex311)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 11:38:37 AM   
MistressLorelei


Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline 		"Forced" bi is relative.  What I would want to happen in this area could vary greatly from the desires of another Dominant Woman in a similar relationship, as could My desires with one submissive to another.  The bond, the emotions, and  the trust that are present in My relationship are what will define what we will experience.

MichaelGa...  what could cause you emotional harm may not cause the same in another submissive.  Again, everything is individual.  I consider Myself smart enough, and  cautious enough to not damage My submissive.  Also, in the past I have moved past  a few of My own "hard" limits as well as some of a submissive, and we both grew from the situation.  I did not set out to break these limits, it just evolved that way.  Sometimes, things that feel wrong today, are the right experiences of tomorrow.  If not, I would not touch the limits.... though a little pushing is still fun. <wicked smile>

(in reply to alex311)
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RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 12:38:22 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

it is my firm belief that is would cause me emotional harm to break this hard limit.

How would you notice?

You know, the people who most vehemently and repeatedly proclaim their "straightness" are often just closet cases who cannot deal with their true feelings.  Perhaps that's why people think you're gay?  Or it might be the karaoke.

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 12:51:57 PM   
MistressLorelei


Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

i don't want any man within 100-feet of me...espeically naked. i most certainly will NOT stuck on one either...no matter how much any Mistress may want it...not in this or any lifetime...regardless of what gender i am.


It seems unhealthy to Me to have such hatred towards either gender... especially your own.  I can understand not wanting to, or being unsure if you could "perform" on another male... but to despise them the way you indicate is alarming.

P.S.  I happen to think males are great... especially the ones who realize they are inferior. <smiles>

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 1:30:50 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressLorelei

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

i don't want any man within 100-feet of me...espeically naked. i most certainly will NOT stuck on one either...no matter how much any Mistress may want it...not in this or any lifetime...regardless of what gender i am.


It seems unhealthy to Me to have such hatred towards either gender... especially your own. I can understand not wanting to, or being unsure if you could "perform" on another male... but to despise them the way you indicate is alarming.

P.S. I happen to think males are great... especially the ones who realize they are inferior. <smiles>


I'm more confused by why this preference and limit needs to be laid out over and over and over and over by michaelGA.

I don't see any one here trying to force him into any relationship bi or straight. Its your hard limit, michaelGA, why are you continuing to bring it up over and over and over and over? If someone is trying to tell you that you aren't allowed a hard limit in this area, put them on ban or ignore or something so you don't have to read their BS.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to MistressLorelei)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 1:49:25 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressLorelei

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

i don't want any man within 100-feet of me...espeically naked. i most certainly will NOT stuck on one either...no matter how much any Mistress may want it...not in this or any lifetime...regardless of what gender i am.


It seems unhealthy to Me to have such hatred towards either gender... especially your own.  I can understand not wanting to, or being unsure if you could "perform" on another male... but to despise them the way you indicate is alarming.

Michael's list of "I hate" is lengthy ... and tedious.  It includes charity work and... I'm sad to report as far as I can tell Michael himself.

When just about anyone talks about just about any activity, he bounced into the notestream with "I hate this" or "that's sick/wrong".  Just take a look at his last 100 posts.  I finally put him on ignore, but I still see some of his comments in quotes from others on the board.

When he first arrived, a number of people went out of their way to help what seemed like a very depressed man, only to be dismissed, because, it seems, he likes to be depressed.  Slowly, it's become apparent from his comments that much of his unhappiness seems to stem from his inability to deal with core urges that much of society now recognizes as within the range we now accept as "normality."

Notice in his last phrase that he's now beginning to recognize that he may have a variable gender:  "regardless of what gender i am."  Hopefully, he will expand on that and find the happiness that, so far, seems to have escaped him.

< Message edited by JohnWarren -- 4/5/2006 1:53:16 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to MistressLorelei)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 2:04:33 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JohnWarren

Notice in his last phrase that he's now beginning to recognize that he may have a variable gender:  "regardless of what gender i am."  Hopefully, he will expand on that and find the happiness that, so far, seems to have escaped him.

It's not the first time he's made such a reference.  It was shortly followed by excuses as to why doing something about it was out of the question.  SOP.

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 4:41:59 PM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline
Well the Michael talk and those trying to goad him aside, this has been an eye opening and informative thread that is very relevant to things swirling in my life these days. I thank strob for posing this question.

I know many don't like the label Bi-sexual that is used by me that anyone who has engaged in man on man sexual activity would be Bi-sexual. But that's my take. I'd also think that the majority of the vanilla world would look at it that way too. I do reserve the right to be wrong about that however.

Let me make perfectly clear that I have no problem with others engaging in this, I understand and respect any Domme that enjoys this. I frankly had no idea it was just so common in this lifestyle.

I also understand that when in subspace, I would be vulnerable to my Domme if we were in an established relationship/connection, to submitting to this. I just don’t know if I could live with the consequences. Thus right-wrong- or otherwise, I do question my level of commitment as a submissive and whether going deeper into the lifestyle is wise for me. I almost see it as inevitable were I to continue. This is tough.

(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 5:08:28 PM   
SpaceForMore


Posts: 32
Joined: 2/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

it is my firm belief that is would cause me emotional harm to break this hard limit.


Mike,

If, per chance, one day you end up doing this when you were not quite yourself, due to having an incredible time with some domme, and it happened when you were vulnerable, I give you these words of advice knowing how some people are prone to destructive feelings of guilt: it is ok. what is past is past. you are still you.  

< Message edited by SpaceForMore -- 4/5/2006 5:23:51 PM >

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 5:21:11 PM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:


TeeGO

I am a bit frustrated by this whole idea right now. It seems to me that bi-sexuality is a bigger part of the BDSM lifestyle than I thought. It’s a place I cannot go. It does have me questioning myself as a submissive though.


I really don't see what being bi and being submissive has to do with one another. Granted there are a lot of female dominants that are into that sort of thing, I'm not one of them and I'm sure I'm not alone.

I've been asked since I am part of a poly home do I expect any male I may accept to be bisexual? No, I don't. My husband is straight as an arrow so in reality, if they are bisexual... well, that's a part of themselves they would have to lose if they wanted to be a part of our family.

quote:

I also understand that when in subspace, I would be vulnerable to my Domme if we were in an established relationship/connection, to submitting to this. I just don’t know if I could live with the consequences. Thus right-wrong- or otherwise, I do question my level of commitment as a submissive and whether going deeper into the lifestyle is wise for me. I almost see it as inevitable were I to continue. This is tough.


TeeGO, I think the important lesson here isn't whether or not you should continue your journey in this lifestyle, it's learning what questions to ask a potential dominant. These boards are awesome for that, our girl read everyone of our posts so she could learn how we felt about a variety of subjects without having to just take our word on it. Use this as a learning tool not a stumbling block.

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 5:32:36 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

it is my firm belief that is would cause me emotional harm to break this hard limit.

How would you notice?

You know, the people who most vehemently and repeatedly proclaim their "straightness" are often just closet cases who cannot deal with their true feelings.  Perhaps that's why people think you're gay?  Or it might be the karaoke.

~stef


i don't know what your fixation is to try and put me in the "gay" category, but this is one of the reasons i DO post to these things. it's because you tend to think that, regardless of how adamant someone is about NOT being gay, that thet MUST be gay.

let me see if i can make this as clear as i can to you, stef...i would rather put a bullet in my head before EVER letting a man touch me...even if i were female...which i am male...does THAT satisfy your sense of reality?


_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 5:33:29 PM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline 		Very wise advice, thank you.  I'm not at a point of giving up, but at a point of serious reflection; and honestly, of confusion.

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 5:57:41 PM   
WyrdRich


Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline 		    The fastest way to convince the world you're an alcoholic is to NEVER take a drink

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 6:17:47 PM   
MistressLorelei


Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO

Let me make perfectly clear that I have no problem with others engaging in this, I understand and respect any Domme that enjoys this. I frankly had no idea it was just so common in this lifestyle.

I also understand that when in subspace, I would be vulnerable to my Domme if we were in an established relationship/connection, to submitting to this. I just don’t know if I could live with the consequences. Thus right-wrong- or otherwise, I do question my level of commitment as a submissive and whether going deeper into the lifestyle is wise for me. I almost see it as inevitable were I to continue. This is tough.


Certainly having the hard limit of not interacting with males should not preclude you from finding a Dominant Woman or from heading deeper into 'the lifestyle'.  Many Dominant Females have the same hard limit themselves or for many the limitation would not play a role in the relationship at all. 

Personally, I would possibly be willing to consider a relationship with this hard limit, if I thought all else seemed perfect, I just so much would rather feel that our limits would be created by our combined chemistry, rather than a pre-set list of 'no-no's', but that's Me... lots of Dominant Women, lots of different types of relationships.  Bi interests may be somewhat common, but it's certainly not all that's out there. 

< Message edited by MistressLorelei -- 4/5/2006 6:23:29 PM >

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 6:40:02 PM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline
OK, I guess I need to explain a little bit of my personal situation. I think you might better see where I’m coming from and why I’m so, um, down about things.

My best friend, my mentor into the lifestyle, is my Domme. Or rather somewhat is, or maybe was, it’s really not clear except for the fact that it’s not going to be long term. Confused yet? Anyway, she is a switch, more sub than Dom. She is currently seeking a Dom most earnestly. Recent developments have brought very good possibilities into her life. (Tomorrow could be a huge day for her.) The thing is, the Doms she has run into are big into the cuckolding thing.

Don’t misunderstand, she cares for me greatly. But she can give me no real assurances. Things get complicated when you sub to a sub. In other words, she could get deep into subspace, her will turned over to her Dom, then she is doing his will. Turn that toward me and well here we are at this very issue . So basically what has happened is our D/s relationship is at an end. There is still some interaction, but that’s another story and that could be ending very soon. Back to the point; my D/s relationship has just ended over this very topic.

(in reply to MistressLorelei)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 6:58:51 PM   
sosniagara


Posts: 31
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		 
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

quote:

A hard limit today can be a soft limit tomorrow ...


not with me it's not...to me, it's "always" a hard limit (i.e. men)



It's one thing to say you're not gay but not opposed to gay activity however it's another thing to be the *top* poster in a thread about "forced bi" yet claim not to be into it ;)

As for all the women in this thread I can def see how this would be an important act for you. Being stright myself I know it would place me in a remarkably submissive position doing that because a woman demanded it.

Thankfully I've chosen to remain a virgin till till married/owned (nothing based on religion btw) so I seriously doubt it'll come up unless that old Barenaked Ladies line "If I had a million dollars" comes up lol

_____________________________

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(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 7:15:41 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

i don't know what your fixation is to try and put me in the "gay" category, but this is one of the reasons i DO post to these things. it's because you tend to think that, regardless of how adamant someone is about NOT being gay, that thet MUST be gay.

Michael, at no time have I ever said I thought you were gay.  Please don't let your unbridled emotions override reality any more than they already have.

quote:

let me see if i can make this as clear as i can to you, stef...i would rather put a bullet in my head before EVER letting a man touch me...even if i were female...which i am male...does THAT satisfy your sense of reality?

My sense of reality is just fine.  I understood your feelings on this matter the first time you stated them.  The subsequent hundred or so times were nothing but overkill.

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 7:46:02 PM   
MistressLorelei


Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline 		Ahhhh... I see light.  Sorry to hear about your situation, and I do agree about the possibility that your Domme's sub-space could cause problems.  I had a relationship with a switch (he was submissive towards Me) and encountered problems in many areas I never anticipated.  However, if she is aware of your hard limit and wishes to continue your relationship, perhaps there is hope as long as communication is open and safewords are available.

(By the way cuckold relationships do not have to include male to male contact, this could possibly please all parties involved.. just a thought).

I have no other advice for your present situation, except that failed relationships, while sad, are not the end to all relationships ever.  I can also tell you that, if you have found that elements in this lifestyle are what fulfill you, going on without them likely won't be enough.

Hang in there and good luck.

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Forced bi as a must?! - 4/5/2006 7:50:28 PM   
sosniagara


Posts: 31
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stef
My sense of reality is just fine.  I understood your feelings on this matter the first time you stated them.  The subsequent hundred or so times were nothing but overkill.

~stef


Overkill or self denial?

_____________________________

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(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 100
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