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RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 2:03:16 AM

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

learn to present yourself with something worth noticing, grace, class, wit, passion, be interested in others

quote:

get ideas from my profile it's all fuzzy and warm cuddly too

Excerpts from your profile.

I am looking for . . .
I won’t be treated like a door mat . . .
I won’t be forced to have kids . . .

There are times when I can’t keep myself accountable and just blow things off . . .
Some times I don’t do what I should . . .

I want a guy that respects me . . .
I want a guy that is genuine . . .

I am like your girl next door that can hang with the friends and the family. However, in private I have a dark side.

Only interested in Single Males ages 27-36. No Couples!!
~~~end of excerpts

WoW…. You seem to have an “I” problem. And, you the only thing you offer is instability and apathy. If I were you and you truly want a Dom. I would:

1. Run downtown and hire 2 hookers to teach you how to suck cock, trust me, it will be you key to suck-sess. Repeat these lessons nightly with new girls until one can finally teach you to to shove a hose down your throat and suck a golf ball through it so hard it shoots out your ass.

2. Now that you can suck dick, erase your profile and copy one of those that offered for you to use theirs.

3. When a Dom does take an interest in you, no matter what he asks, no matter what he says, use your newfound talents and immediately blow him. When you are done blowing him, blow him again. Blow him over and over until he is a spasmodic pile of jelly. Then spread him on your subby toast and keep him as your own. Hopefully he will stay becasue he is stoned on orgasmic endorphines and doesn't notice how self-centerd you are while his cock is in your face.

Quite seriously, you profile reads rather . . . “poorly” and makes you look like a self-centered little shit with nothing to offer but chaos. Can you cook, can you fuck, can you keep a house, do have passion for anything but yourself? Just steal a new profile, blow a Dom, find happiness.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to lally2)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 2:57:43 AM

Posts: 3457
Joined: 5/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

quote:

learn to present yourself with something worth noticing, grace, class, wit, passion, be interested in others

quote:

get ideas from my profile it's all fuzzy and warm cuddly too

Excerpts from your profile.

I am looking for . . .
I won’t be treated like a door mat . . .
I won’t be forced to have kids . . .

There are times when I can’t keep myself accountable and just blow things off . . .
Some times I don’t do what I should . . .

I want a guy that respects me . . .
I want a guy that is genuine . . .

I am like your girl next door that can hang with the friends and the family. However, in private I have a dark side.

Only interested in Single Males ages 27-36. No Couples!!
~~~end of excerpts

WoW…. You seem to have an “I” problem. And, you the only thing you offer is instability and apathy. If I were you and you truly want a Dom. I would:

1. Run downtown and hire 2 hookers to teach you how to suck cock, trust me, it will be you key to suck-sess. Repeat these lessons nightly with new girls until one can finally teach you to to shove a hose down your throat and suck a golf ball through it so hard it shoots out your ass.

2. Now that you can suck dick, erase your profile and copy one of those that offered for you to use theirs.

3. When a Dom does take an interest in you, no matter what he asks, no matter what he says, use your newfound talents and immediately blow him. When you are done blowing him, blow him again. Blow him over and over until he is a spasmodic pile of jelly. Then spread him on your subby toast and keep him as your own. Hopefully he will stay becasue he is stoned on orgasmic endorphines and doesn't notice how self-centerd you are while his cock is in your face.

Quite seriously, you profile reads rather . . . “poorly” and makes you look like a self-centered little shit with nothing to offer but chaos. Can you cook, can you fuck, can you keep a house, do have passion for anything but yourself? Just steal a new profile, blow a Dom, find happiness.

I had no interest in this thread until I saw that Res had replied....now that is sharing some wisdom!!!!...

_____________________________

If you have sex with a siamese twin, is it considered a threesome?

The trouble with ignorance is that it picks up confidence as it goes along.
- Arnold H. Glasow

It may be your sole purpose in life to simply serve as a warning to others!

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 4:43:50 AM

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/20/2008
Status: offline

Wow... it is 6:30 in the morning for me and I am blown away with the responses. I am being honest on here and was looking for help. As one person said is not what the boards are used for, to ask and seek help on issues. As far as my profile goes... I listed things straight up because these were things that I was asked to do but I was not going to do them.

As far as someother things that got asked...'Can you cook, can you fuck, can you keep a house, do have passion for anything but yourself? Just steal a new profile, blow a Dom, find happiness.' Yes I can cook and am getting better at it. I dont think that I am horriable in bed however not the greatest but again not a lot of experience. Yes I can keep a house clean. In fact I am very organized and if not it drives me crazy. I have a passion for traveling, volunteering, watching and playing sports, read Nicholas sparks books, being outdoors camping and looking at flowing water (creeks, rivers, waterfalls)

I am not just looking for a Dom to be a Dom but a bf that is also a Dom. That is why I dont want couples and will only go with guys of a certain age.

< Message edited by goalie1801 -- 2/5/2010 4:45:53 AM >

(in reply to SilverMark)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 4:59:06 AM

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: goalie1801

I have never had a bf so I dont even know how to do that okay!

I am actually speechless from this thread.

You have got to be kidding me with this shit.

A 27 year old woman with reading comprehension problems cannot find a Dom and has never had a boyfriend.

When held against the serious issues going on in the world today and personal problems of vast importance, we need to try and help this one girl out.

Uh, no, I don't have any advice for you OP; join the fucking world, gain some self awareness, stop the pity party and learn to present yourself with something worth noticing, grace, class, wit, passion, be interested in others and in the world and don't make it the epicenter of your total existence.

Not all of us has someone to cuddle every night, but some of us are fine with that until we find someone who is worthy of us.

And if we don't find that person? We believe we are so fabulous and are happy with who we are and our own company, friends and families, so we don't run around bemoaning how hard this is.

but isnt that the point of these boards, to give advice, help people out with stuff.

to be honest if people around the world took the trouble to set thier own issues aside against their neighbours for a moment, to improve the bigger picture there would be fewer problems of vast importance going on. starting nearer to home is one way to go.

if this woman hasnt had a boyfriend so far then that might just be that she hasnt had the confidence or met anyone yet. i dont think making her feel bad about that is in the least bit productive.

allow the fact that some people do find it hard, very hard, for one reason or another, to open up, trust and let someone in.

i dont think she's bemoaning at all. i think she is making a deliberate effort to get some help and feed back. in the end though, what difference does it make what you think or anyone else thinks, in the whole scheme of things, the world and the universe.

You are right, Lally. I should not have been that hard on her. I apologize, I am going through some shit right now and let my bad mood leak onto my reply.

Yes, kindess is more productive, but I still maintain that honest and tough advice is evident in my post and many others (read RS for example).

Simply being kind and empathetic is often not enough; I appreciate when people call me on my shit and I do the same for others. In this case, the OP did not appear to be listening to anything and remained defensive, hence, my tough tone.

(in reply to lally2)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:31:04 AM

osf

Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: goalie1801

Wow... it is 6:30 in the morning for me and I am blown away with the responses. I am being honest on here and was looking for help. As one person said is not what the boards are used for, to ask and seek help on issues. As far as my profile goes... I listed things straight up because these were things that I was asked to do but I was not going to do them.

As far as someother things that got asked...'Can you cook, can you fuck, can you keep a house, do have passion for anything but yourself? Just steal a new profile, blow a Dom, find happiness.' Yes I can cook and am getting better at it. I dont think that I am horriable in bed however not the greatest but again not a lot of experience. Yes I can keep a house clean. In fact I am very organized and if not it drives me crazy. I have a passion for traveling, volunteering, watching and playing sports, read Nicholas sparks books, being outdoors camping and looking at flowing water (creeks, rivers, waterfalls)

I am not just looking for a Dom to be a Dom but a bf that is also a Dom. That is why I dont want couples and will only go with guys of a certain age.

sweetheart you're going about this backwards, first you need to come to grips with you. figure out what you need and what you have to offer for it.

after you have that figured out, you need to work on yourself and try to become that person that the person you need , wants

in a real sense it's all about how you are willing to change, because you certainly don't want him willing to change for you

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to goalie1801)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:32:40 AM

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

I have answered questions and filled in the blanks. If I am the 'OP' and what the hell is that, what else do you want from me. I dont have time or the right mind right now to change my profile. so if that is what you are so up tight about then just forget that at the moment.

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(in reply to sexyred1)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:36:54 AM

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: goalie1801

Wow... it is 6:30 in the morning for me and I am blown away with the responses. I am being honest on here and was looking for help. As one person said is not what the boards are used for, to ask and seek help on issues. As far as my profile goes... I listed things straight up because these were things that I was asked to do but I was not going to do them.

As far as someother things that got asked...'Can you cook, can you fuck, can you keep a house, do have passion for anything but yourself? Just steal a new profile, blow a Dom, find happiness.' Yes I can cook and am getting better at it. I dont think that I am horriable in bed however not the greatest but again not a lot of experience. Yes I can keep a house clean. In fact I am very organized and if not it drives me crazy. I have a passion for traveling, volunteering, watching and playing sports, read Nicholas sparks books, being outdoors camping and looking at flowing water (creeks, rivers, waterfalls)

I am not just looking for a Dom to be a Dom but a bf that is also a Dom. That is why I dont want couples and will only go with guys of a certain age.

Seriously, you need to understand your profile is an ad. Most everyone here is telling you that your ad sucks. You are the one seeking, so sell yourself. I just looked at the profiles they offered to let you use. They are excellent, here is why:

1- They get the reader interested by telling what they offer, what they bring to the relationship.

2- They tell what type of relationship they seek and what experience they have or are willing to have.

3- Then they tell what kind of partner they seek.

… nowhere do they waste my time with negativisms listing what the do not want. Could you imagine if my profile took the time to list the things I am not looking for?

You said:
"Yes I can cook and am getting better at it. I dont think that I am horriable in bed however not the greatest but again not a lot of experience. Yes I can keep a house clean. In fact I am very organized and if not it drives me crazy. I have a passion for traveling . . ."

That is some of the best stuff you have said and still it sounds bad. I have highlighted the parts where you are bashing yourself. You could have said the same things and imparted a much better impression like this:

I am a good chef and I am great in the kitchen and getting better everyday.
I am good in bed and ripe for guidance and training from someone more experienced than myself.
I am a good domestic and keep a clean and well organized house.

... anyway, you get brownie points for your continued attendance to this thread and I take you more sincerely now. I hope you take my reply as sincerely as it was given.

-Good luck

PS. About my prior reply, really good blow jobs never hurt... even if golf balls don't fly outta'your ass.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 2/5/2010 5:40:08 AM >

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to goalie1801)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:44:00 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

You had nice helpful answers at the beginning. But all you did was argue them. When people try to help and are thwarted by someone who claims to want help but passive agressively refuses it they become frustrated, and let that frustration show.

It's ok to have a couple "I won't or don't" on your profile, but it should be more about what you will and you can. Be yourself. Are you funny, clever, charming, serious, deep...etc? Then let whatever it is that you are show.

Put your best foot forward. Would you go out on a first date wearing your old ratty robe and no makeup? I hope the answer to that is "of course not." Then why would you allow your profile to do so? Bring your *A* game. Read the profiles of other subs; don't steal their ideas, but make notes to yourself about who sounds interesting and approachable, and who sounds stiff and aloof. Bring some of that approachability and charisma to your profile...after all...you're awesome...but you won't shine til someone sees how much you sparkle.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to osf)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:46:21 AM

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

1- They get the reader interested by telling what they offer, what they bring to the relationship.

2- They tell what type of relationship they seek and what experience they have or are willing to have.

3- Then they tell what kind of partner they seek.

… nowhere do they waste my time with negativisms listing what the do not want. Could you imagine if my profile took the time to list the things I am not looking for?

I feel like I have done #2 in what kind of relationship I seek. I feel also that I have done #3 in listing what kind of partner I seek.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:53:44 AM

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

So you have no social skills, is what you are saying. And that's why you've never had a boyfriend.
Moreover you have something in your past that has caused you to be unable to learn appropriate social skills. So you want a date like a kid would have, and everyone in your age group has moved on to more advanced relationships.

You need to learn the social skills you so far have not acquired. I suggest professional therapy to uncover the issues that prevented you learning them. If you cannot afford that, then look up the nearest ACOA meeting and start attending them. That cost is a dollar in the pot. Give up one soda a week and you can do it. No excuses.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to goalie1801)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 5:59:42 AM

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/20/2008
Status: offline

WTF!! ACOA? I didnt know what that was and looked up and it is Adult Children of Alcoholics. I dont understand. There was no alcoholics in my family for the most part.

(in reply to DesFIP)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:01:36 AM

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

Wow... it is 6:30 in the morning for me and I am blown away with the responses. I am being honest on here and was looking for help. As one person said is not what the boards are used for, to ask and seek help on issues.

Believe it or not, you have received a lot of good advice

quote:

As far as my profile goes... I listed things straight up because these were things that I was asked to do but I was not going to do them.

It does not seem that you aren't going to take even the most simple of advice, like rewrite your profile

quote:

As far as someother things that got asked...'Can you cook, can you fuck, can you keep a house, do have passion for anything but yourself? Just steal a new profile, blow a Dom, find happiness.' Yes I can cook and am getting better at it. I dont think that I am horriable in bed however not the greatest but again not a lot of experience. Yes I can keep a house clean. In fact I am very organized and if not it drives me crazy. I have a passion for traveling, volunteering, watching and playing sports, read Nicholas sparks books, being outdoors camping and looking at flowing water (creeks, rivers, waterfalls)

Then say "Inexperienced submissive seeks dominant male that she can cook for, learn to fuck better, and I will keep a house. I have a passion for traveling, volunteering, watching and playing sports, read Nicholas sparks books, being outdoors camping and looking at flowing water (creeks, rivers, waterfalls"

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to goalie1801)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:05:36 AM

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

It's ok to have a couple "I won't or don't" on your profile, but it should be more about what you will and you can. Be yourself. Are you funny, clever, charming, serious, deep...etc? Then let whatever it is that you are show.

When looking I have found that the way to maximize responses is to concentrate on what I wanted and leave all "don't wants" off my page. If I have stated what I "do" want, and someone who isn't in those parameters emails me, well I am not responsible for their time wasting, they are for not looking at what I stated that I wanted.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:07:37 AM

Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

Lie down with your nose to the floor and your arse up in the air: one is sure to come by your way and take advantage of you .

_____________________________

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

(in reply to kittinSol)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:10:02 AM

Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
Status: offline

OP,
You'll never get a Dom because as your avatar title indicates you are Vanilla!

_____________________________

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

(in reply to VirginPotty)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:23:57 AM

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/20/2008
Status: offline

Well excuse me for my name. I really dont care for yours and dont understand it. My name is part of me so I am not changing it.

(in reply to VirginPotty)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:28:18 AM

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: goalie1801

Well excuse me for my name. I really dont care for yours and dont understand it. My name is part of me so I am not changing it.

Just poking my head in to say...

Potty said your avatar title, not your username. If you look under your username beside your post, you'll find your avatar title. It does, indeed, say vanilla as you have not posted much.

It was a joke.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to goalie1801)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:29:28 AM

osf

Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

goalie , watch that or i'll have to come spank you

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to goalie1801)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:30:32 AM

osf

Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: osf

goalie , watch that or i'll have to come spank you

was that the right thing to say to a submissive?

_____________________________

all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to osf)

RE: How to get a Dom? - 2/5/2010 6:30:36 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: goalie1801

Well excuse me for my name. I really dont care for yours and dont understand it. My name is part of me so I am not changing it.

Just poking my head in to say...

Potty said your avatar title, not your username. If you look under your username beside your post, you'll find your avatar title. It does, indeed, say vanilla as you have not posted much.

It was a joke.

Yeah, but Aquatic?

You're still green.

Just sayin'...

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to AquaticSub)

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