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Not many switches? - 4/1/2006 11:54:08 PM

texguy98

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I've noticed that there are a TON of posts in the "Ask a Dom/me" forums, "Ask a sub" forums, etc. I've also noticed that this forum is a bit dead. Is it just that there arn't many switches out in the world?

Tex

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 12:03:54 AM

enthralled

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In my honest opinion, I just think they're either answering as a Dominant or as a submissive depending on which 'hat' they're wearing at the time.

Respectfully,
~enthralled

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 12:05:54 AM

texguy98

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That makes sense :) I tend to spend more time in the Submissive forums. :)

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 12:41:45 AM

NickInSLC

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I don't think there are as many of us switches as there are tops and bottoms. In many circles, we switches are considered to be less legitimate and so many of us will try to live as top or bottom.

But Enthralled makes a great point, most of the topping and bottoming information is completely relevant to us. And really, how much space can we dedicate to trying to explain how we can swing back and forth between bottom and top to those who only relate to a desire to do one or the other?

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 3:06:08 AM

SISSYofDENMARK

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From: Denmark
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In beforehand I ´m submitted to my sub`s limitations as a downline....It`s about powerexchange - it habours both sides...

-besides being a pro Domme - I´m freequently asked how I can practice both sides i.e switching without loosing my authority? No- no problem as I like to concider my self having a rounded and varied personality, who sometimes crawl despite having two legs - and despite I like candy ,I still add salt&pepper accordingly to my food -I don`t see the switching more complicated than simply that.BDSM & s/D is not a science - it´s just a game; hopefully for mutual fun and amusement. I also don´t wear my leatherrettes in practicing my officiel work/job as a senior-nurse !!!

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 7:09:55 AM

fergus

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It becomes active when you become active.

Too quiet? Post more questions and/or discussions. People will respond.

fergus

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 7:17:49 AM

SimplyV

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

It becomes active when you become active.

Too quiet? Post more questions and/or discussions. People will respond.

fergus

Shh you're ruining the plan. Didn't you get the memo? All Switches are in hidding.. underground.. we're planning a revolt! Soon we will take over CM..

*guides Fergus to the stash of keyboards in the arsenal* Just a few more.. And CM will be ours!!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(ok.. I really gotta go get some sleep.. this insomnia thing is messing with my head)

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 7:41:33 AM

fergus

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Hmm, how come I was not informed?

Are I not revolting enough?

fergus

< Message edited by fergus -- 4/2/2006 7:42:16 AM >

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/2/2006 8:53:49 AM

WyrdRich

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I think it's simply a matter of putting a post in the appropriate forum. When the right question is posed, the lights in this place shine.

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 4:37:35 AM

Lashra

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

Hmm, how come I was not informed?

Are I not revolting enough?

fergus

Your too cute to be revolting Fergus

In response to the OP I think there's alot of switches out there but alot are *closeted* because there is a feeling of intolerance in the community. Frankly I don't give a shit who thinks what about me lol I'm a happy Domswitch and as long as I'm happy, that's all that matters.

~Lashra

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 6:16:34 AM

Devidasi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NickInSLC
In many circles, we switches are considered to be less legitimate and so many of us will try to live as top or bottom.

Thank you! The last time I had an account on this site, I listed myself as a switch and was presently urged very strongly to choose one or the other. It was maddening!

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 7:06:30 AM

Lashra

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Devidasi

quote:

ORIGINAL: NickInSLC
In many circles, we switches are considered to be less legitimate and so many of us will try to live as top or bottom.

Thank you! The last time I had an account on this site, I listed myself as a switch and was presently urged very strongly to choose one or the other. It was maddening!

You list yourself to your own true nature and screw what anyone here thinks about it. Nobody here is fit to judge anyone else. To thine ownself be true I say

~Lashra

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 9:20:12 AM

Evanesce

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We're here. We just don't have anything "switch-specific" being discussed at the moment. Got any ideas?

Of course, we could dredge back up the subjects of how we're misunderstood and maligned as being confused and ignorant about who we "really" are. That's always good for a few days' worth of bitch fest.

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Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 10:17:45 AM

NickInSLC

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Yanno, there seems to be a bias from CollarMe even. I listed myself as dominant because many of my interests were not included as options with a switch profile.

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 10:56:07 AM

KittenWithaTwist

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I think there's a bias in general against switches. Many people don't seem to respect switches much...

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 1:43:23 PM

fergus

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I don't think that is a bias AGAINST Switches so much as it is that switches are so far in the minority that others just don't stop to consider them. Adding their interests to the list and what not.

But let us not get overly PC about it ;) I seriously doubt there is a conspiracy against switches among the powers that be at CM.

fergus

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 4:33:01 PM

SimplyV

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

I don't think that is a bias AGAINST Switches so much as it is that switches are so far in the minority that others just don't stop to consider them. Adding their interests to the list and what not.

But let us not get overly PC about it ;) I seriously doubt there is a conspiracy against switches among the powers that be at CM.

fergus

No.. No.. there is always a conspiracy. I know people are out to get me.. my switchy-witchyness and all.

Yes there is a bias against switches. I will say this is especially true of "purists".. Those who desire conformity to a black and white mold. Its not always conscious but it is there.

A couple years ago, when I came online to research myself as a submissive (because frankly I had always been taught that was a woman's place, but we don't want to go into that) I found a home among people in a chatroom who would chase out any "switch" because they were just a "player" or "faker".. It became ingrained in me that "switching" was bad. You had to be either or.

Now that I've read more and researched more and come more into myself.. I realise that those views are just BS. And probably a groups way of dealing with something they just didn't understand and didn't want to understand.

I think as more and more of us come out and hold true to what we are, that more people will understand and come to terms with it. This isn't a black and white world, no matter how much people would like it to be.

As for conspiracy theories.. well.. those are a dime a dozen and most of them are half-true (even if its just stemmed from ignorance).

So hush... the revolution is at hand. *sneaks all the switches keyboards* Commence Typing!

MUAHAHAHA.. the world will now be OURS.

*sighs* (I don't think the sleep helped me much, now did it?)

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 6:07:00 PM

Devidasi

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Rant Time!

I've also seen a lot of profiles from people who look down on those who don't live and breathe the lifestyle 24/7. There are so many reasons that might not be possible for certain individuals. Its pure snobbery, in my opinion. SimplyV, I think you are right about the purists. These kinds of people seem to feel superior simply because they are more "hardcore" and "traditional" than others.

Personally, I find that attitude extremely unattractive and have had to tell several members so in no uncertain terms much to their dismay.

I'm just getting into this lifestyle. I've had people get angry with me for calling it a subculture instead of a lifestyle. I've had people get pissy with me for calling it "play" - well, lots of other people call it that. I like the idea of play, but so many people don't think that's serious enough. I think it seems way too serious. I want to have fun, but if I say that, people think I'm a faker or that I'm just out to take advantage of people.

Its very frustrating to hear from people who think I'm confused because I say in my profile and journal that I'm not interested in having relationships with certain kinds of people, or that I'm stupid because I don't like the idea of being with a dominant male at this phase in my life.

What I don't understand is why these people feel that they have to correct others constantly instead of minding their own business. Did they ever learn anything about ettiquette at all? And how would they feel if I was filling their in-boxes with preachy BS?

Sorry. You've probably heard all this a million times. I think I'm done now.

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 6:10:23 PM

fergus

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V,

Tell me again why you live in Texas? lol, are you ever gonna move to the United States? We'd love to have you.

fergus

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RE: Not many switches? - 4/3/2006 7:11:10 PM

Flame73

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Heeyyyy what's wrong with Texas? It's not like they're still in the mindset it a seperate republic or anything.(cue repeated litany of the Texas pledge)
But seriously folks, I think there is a great misunderstanding in the Lifestyle of "those who switch" because We don't play by the rules and We don't fit in the molds.
Personally I love announcing that I switch, and I love some of the challenges I get when I do so. It's so hard for some people to fathom that because I choose to submit to One, that it does not in any way affect My ability to be a Sadisticly gorgeous Mistress. I think truthfully We're shunned alot of the time because of Our obvious confidence in who We are and what We need to be satisfied. I think it's intimidating to see the stigma sometimes given to switching,that certain pigeonholed individuals see that We have both the strength of character and will power ( aka Balls) to overcome with grace and pride.
I would never think of misrepresenting Myself in any forum, because I'm intensely proud of who I've grown to be in this Lifestyle. I've earned every stripe and ever kiss of My boot, and I'm not ashamed to admit either.

Vive' La Resistance!

~S~

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"It is far more comfortable to exist in Madness, than to hold teniously to sanity riddled with doubts."

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