Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (Full Version)

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zenditz -> Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 4:37:01 PM)

First i just like want to thank everyone,

It's feels really nice to have this lil place for us submissives (and slaves).  I'm a submissive, and some of the time it feels like the online Doms that like approach me don't see any difference, and expect me to like fall to my knees just like in their presence.  Now, I've like never done that.  I mean I'm a submissive... but I'm like so not the worlds submissive.  So let me just like say thanks to everyone for like helping me to feel less ashamed & guilty about that.

I mean I was begining to feel like I must have been like the world like worst submissive for like not sending nude pictures to everyone who like messages me... especially since a lot seem to like disappear if I don't.  Some like have even gotten really rude and mean.  And I was begining to feel like I wasn't worth any Dom's time or love.

I also want to thank everyone for sharing their feelings on needing love in the BDSM relationships.  I do, and I have in my two real life D/s relationships, but I have yet to even feel like any Dom who's like approached me online, at least like not yet, feels like I have like the right to feel that way... like I can only fall in love once I submit.

I've also had a lot of problems with like what I've started like calling 'fade away' Doms.  Like one Dom I talked to online for like three months, we met and went out twice before we were even going to like go any further.  He left some of His ropes, a gag, and like a blindfold for me and we like set up out next date.  And then like *poof*.  He was just like gone.  No more e-mails, IM's or anything... which left me feeling very rejected and alone... and guilty cause like I still had his toys.

So like needless to say, my online experience with like D/s and like trying to find a real life Dom has been quite painful.  And because of like my handicap, which has like rapidly progressed over my last like three years... well I don't like have any real world options anymore for trying to find my DreamDom.  My heart aches, as I feel like I'm not ever getting closer... and I'm just wonderring if any submissive here has actually had real life good luck with like finding their DreamDom, who ever and however that may be?

Take care,
     Katie




Merritt27 -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 6:51:01 PM)

katie,

i did find my Master/Daddy via the internet.  It is a great way to meet people if you are careful.  you sound like a sweet girl....be patient and it will happen for you in time.  Until then, you are on a great site to ask questions and learn about this lifestyle....so enjoy yourself! 

Take Care




CanadianGuy -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 7:24:48 PM)

Good luck to you Katie.  Everybody is looking for their perfect mate (except those who have found them who are very lucky) so don't feel bad that you're not there yet.  Enjoy life every day, not just waiting for the perfect thing to come around the corner.  When it does come, you'll already be very happy and it'll make you even happier.  *hug*




Evanesce -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 7:26:49 PM)

Like, dudette... go easy on the like, "like."  That was like almost painful to read! 
 
Anyway... yes, there are those of us here who found Sir Right Dom online.  I'm one of them.  It took me three years of wading through wankers, wannabes and those who just, for one reason or another, were not a good fit for my life and my needs.  Then, as soon as I stopped looking (and was actually rebounding from what I'd thought was really going to be the real thing, but wound up ripping my heart from my chest), He found me.  We talked, met in person a few weeks later, and we've been together just three weeks shy of six years now.
 
It does happen.  You just have to pay attention to red flags, listen to your instincts, know who you are and what you want, and don't settle for anything less than what you really need.  It means you're going to have to deal with a lot of "phantom Doms," but in time, you'll find the right one for you.
 
Good luck to you.




TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 9:12:23 PM)

Patience.............many have found their mate...many have not....some found them here on CM..some at their local events...some inadvertently while in "vanilla" mode...(Yikes!...if I keep going I may start to sound like Dr Seuss!)...anyway...patience..be well..tempting




WyrdRich -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 10:26:40 PM)

     We met a very nice couple at a munch a few months ago who mentioned they had initially met on this board.  Turned out they had gotten married the same day my wife and I had.

     Best of luck to you
      Rich




slaveofdarkhold -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/7/2006 11:21:30 PM)

I did meet my Master online, although neither of us were looking for a relationship at the time. When we met we didn't know of each other's interests (and at the time I wasn't too clear on my own) and were just friends for a long long time before anything developed. So don't be disheartened, not everyone on the internet is a badguy, and sometimes the best things happen when you least expect it.
Don't give up, there's someone for everyone




ShiftedJewel -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 5:19:18 AM)

I met my husband online. Different site though. Funny thing is, we had both filled out those "what are you looking for" things and neither of us matched the others "wish list". But we met anyway, can never have to many friends, right? We went on three dates and moved in together. He is my soulmate, he is my life, my happiness, my heart, he is my best friend.
 
Now, a few years later... We met our girl here on collarme. You couldn't ask for a more perfect fit. She is everything we could have wanted. It happens, like others have said, pay attention to the red flags that pop up, but keep an open mind, remember we're all nothing more then human and life happens while you're busy making plans.




amaidiamond -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 5:57:24 AM)

I met my ex Dom online, He is a fantastic sweet caring guy, we parted because we were both gonig in different directions not because of any one thing that was *wrong* as such, more that we work far better together as best friends that we did as Dom and sub so yes, there are good men out there. Just got to dig a lot of coal to find a diamond




ScooterTrash -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 6:07:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShiftedJewel

I met my husband online. Different site though. Funny thing is, we had both filled out those "what are you looking for" things and neither of us matched the others "wish list". But we met anyway, can never have to many friends, right? We went on three dates and moved in together. He is my soulmate, he is my life, my happiness, my heart, he is my best friend.
 
Now, a few years later... We met our girl here on collarme. You couldn't ask for a more perfect fit. She is everything we could have wanted. It happens, like others have said, pay attention to the red flags that pop up, but keep an open mind, remember we're all nothing more then human and life happens while you're busy making plans.

Ditto what she said...of course insert wife where she says hubby..lol. As far as "our" search for "our" girl...yes there were bumps along the way in that search, but it ended up great, so those who think it can't happen....yes it can.




twicehappy -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 6:12:20 AM)

Let me start by saying I am with you on not being just anybody’s sub/slave. While i am a slave to the ones who own me, i am only submissive to my pair. I too ran into many who from the 1st email demanded I address them as master. No way, I politely cut off further contact with these doms immediately. Same for those who persisted in telling me all I needed was a collar around my neck to cure all my ills and make my heart go pitty pat with blind love and devotion. Big giant red flags there. I am (with the exception of toward the ones whose collar I wear) extremely independent and strong willed. When I submit I do so unreservedly, but it comes from the depths of my being, solely for the ones I love.

One of the regular posters on here said it best with her signature line “I am a slave; I am not your slave”

Now for the good news; it is possible to meet your dream Dom online.

I spent 6 years searching, both online, at play parties, retreats, you name it I was active in it. Yet where I found my pair is right here on CollarMe. Lol, I was only looking for the ONE and quite accidentally found TWO.

Best part is I had given up actively searching for awhile; I was only sending an email to a friend here at cm when the picture that popped up caught my eye simply because of the name, ScooterTrash. As I’ve said here before, being very fond of scooter trash, (for those who do not know this is another word for biker, not a derogatory term), I sent him an email. He sent me a fairly rude one back. So I replied, as is my wont, quite vehemently. At this point he did apologize. We began a fast and furious email and im relationship which included his wife and co-domme, ShiftedJewel. It only took a few weeks and I was 99.99% he was the one, although what was to happen between she and I was unexpected.

I got on a plane and flew 2000 miles to meet them. When I saw them, when I got close to him my heart leaped, I knew it, I found him at long last. Not to make either of us sound sleazy, but it took about a half hour before we jumped each others bones, vanilla style, (an unusual occurrence for both of us).

A few days later cuddled in his wife’s arm strictly for a nap my brain went, wow, I realized I felt the same encompassing love and submission towards her.

Two or so weeks later on Valentine’s Day they offered me their collar, which I could not jump fast enough to accept.

A more perfect fit I cannot imagine. I adore them both. The love I feel for each of them fills my every waking moment. I wake each day with a smile on my face, I go to bed each night content with my world. I am enslaved by love.

Fairy tales do still come true. Do not give up on finding your ONE online. It can happen, it does happen, it happened for me in doubles.

When I was collared I changed my cm name to twicehappy, now you know why.




slavejali -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 6:15:07 AM)

I met my Master online, He is now my Master, husband, lover, best friend and closest confidante.




MrMister -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 6:39:06 AM)

Although it is sometimes quite frustrating searching for a compatable mate within the confines of this lifestyle, you just hang in there Katie and everything will be okay. But don't ever give up on, or settle for less than, what you truly need in your life. For it certainly is as some one has already pointed out - There are, without a doubt, some wonderful people out here; however, chances are highly likely that you will have to sort though an inordinate amount of chaff before you actually find that special someone who will fill your every want and need. But then again, you may very well find them within the next 47 seconds or so. We just never know when the opportunity will present itself. But perserverance and determination are indeed the keys to success.

I sure do wish you all the very best.




sweetbbwsub31 -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 6:48:51 AM)

i met my previous Dom online. He is a wonderful man who has taught me so much about myself and about life. You have to spend a lot of time pulling weeds to find that perfect garden. Trust yourself and don't settle for any Dom who isn't your perfect fit. It could take years but when it is right.. all the waiting melts away.




JohnWarren -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 7:23:41 AM)

Libby found me by reading some postings I'd made on a message board.   We're married and have been together 13 years and one month.   That said, from my observations of the scene, I think that face to face organizations, groups, classes and events are a much better way to meet partners.  We generally now limit our online time to casual things and meet our play partners at the face to face events.  Just last night we met a wonderful submissive couple from Georgia and we plan to play for the first time tonight.

A good source of local groups is www.darkheart.com/usalist.html

--
Sent from LLC NYC




swtnsparkling -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 7:24:01 AM)

I've been involved in this lifestyle ten years. My 1st Master I met online and to this very day we still are the closet of friends. I met my Ex Mistress online - we were very close friends for about 4 yrs before I became her sub we are still very close- best friends. The most deceitful hurtful relationship I ever had was with a couple  I never spoke to online but  had met in Real Life at a BDSM event. So it isn't always online were one might get screwed.




waterdance -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 7:46:33 AM)

i too met my Master on line.. it does happen as you have read here.. don't give up.  i have found that things happen when the time is right. imho.. i wish you all the best.
respectfully,
waterdance




petcerina -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 8:24:23 AM)

i met Master here on collarme while i was recovering from a hard break up with a former Dom.  He was over my age limit and i never seriously considered Him while i was trying to find someone else.  W/we exchanged screen names on yahoo and talked for a month.  He always made me laugh and i found Him fun to talk to even though He was a little crazy (not crazy crazy just silly crazy).  Finally i decided to talk on the phone with Him and things went so well, that within a week i decided to meet Him at the mall.  W/we hit it off immediately and i had the best first date of my life.  It's been 9 months now and things are still going great.  W/we both found each other when W/we weren't looking.  It just happened out of no where.  He was not what i was expecting would be the perfect Dom for me, but He is :) and i'm happy i found Him.




MHOO314 -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 12:58:31 PM)

After a long search, I met My perfect submissive on here, he wears My training collar, is in the middle of getting his things in order in anticipation of moving to Me--dreams can come true.
 
I love you boy.




Dustyn -> RE: Thank you... and worries. Has anyone met their DreamDom online? (4/8/2006 1:04:47 PM)

Beware of online personas.  Half the time, you are only seeing th witty, intelligent side of people, not the brain damaged, moronic things we do away from the computer.

Think of it as falling in love with an ideal, not a person.




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