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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

Rochsub, once again you are forgetting that the sex is not the only sexual thing.
Whatever arouses you is sexual!
Whatever puts focus on sex is sexual.
That's why even your chastity training was very sexual.

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ORIGINAL: Silence8
We could reverse it, and say that, yes, everything, everything at all, is sexual, and that only makes it better! Maybe that's the difference between sensual and sexual, even though the two tend to be connected.

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

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ORIGINAL: Silence8
We could reverse it, and say that, yes, everything, everything at all, is sexual, and that only makes it better! Maybe that's the difference between sensual and sexual, even though the two tend to be connected.

But in the end, the inescapable truth remains. I am not a particularly sexual human. Sex just plain isn't that important to me. Yet I do this also. Humans are complex. Our motivations are especially complex.

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But you misunderstood my message.  i said that only ONE of those situations involved chastity.  The others were completely asexual.

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot
.That's what I am trying to say, somewhere deeply hidden, I think it is always connected to sexuality.
For example, if I ever felt desire to dominate another man, or to be submissive to another man, I would start thinking that I am gay.
Even if there is no sex involved whatsoever.
.

thats homophobia.  if you are homophobic the above as youve said would be impossible for YOU.  absorb the YOU for a while.

absorbed yet or do you need a bit more time.....,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

step away from youre homophobic reaction to this idea and then embrace the fact that not everyone has youre hang up.

for a while ive been quietly curious about submitting to a female dominant - maybe because im female and its that whole thing about being with someone of the same sex and connecting woman to woman that i find attractive and intreaguing.

It's not homophobia - it's heterosexuality. As a heterosexual I have no desire neither to submit to other men nor to dominate them.
If I tried to do so, I would feel very, very awkward and uncomfortable.

With women, however, I am open to all possibilities. I can be submissive, I can be dominant, I can switch, nothing of these things is repulsive to me.
It all depends on the women involved and the chemistry.

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ORIGINAL: lally2

quote:

ORIGINAL: SocratesNot
.That's what I am trying to say, somewhere deeply hidden, I think it is always connected to sexuality.
For example, if I ever felt desire to dominate another man, or to be submissive to another man, I would start thinking that I am gay.
Even if there is no sex involved whatsoever.
.

thats homophobia.  if you are homophobic the above as youve said would be impossible for YOU.  absorb the YOU for a while.

absorbed yet or do you need a bit more time.....,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

step away from youre homophobic reaction to this idea and then embrace the fact that not everyone has youre hang up.

for a while ive been quietly curious about submitting to a female dominant - maybe because im female and its that whole thing about being with someone of the same sex and connecting woman to woman that i find attractive and intreaguing.

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

If you felt any erotic desire or attraction to your Domme during your service, even if this desire was never satisfied, then the relationship has a sexual component.
If you were EVER turned on by her or by thinking about her or by your submission, then it was sexual, even if no sexual acts were ever performed.

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But that's my point.  There was none.  What part of that are you missing?  i think you are so stuck in your own paradigm that you are refusing to accept my reality.

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

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I have friends that are male that have male Doms that are straight and engage in a d/s dynamic without sex that is very much real, one of them going on a decade now.

Well this was enlightening. But I still think that such relationships are extremely rare.

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Excellent point. I'm keeping the whole thing.

Let's ask you, SN. Let's suppose you met someone of casual acquaintance who, if you were to be in service to them, could help to introduce you to the real world that is BDSM. Introduce you to people in the lifestyle to see how they really lived. Teach you first hand experience of what this was all about. Answer all of your questions, not just from them, but provide the gateway to connecting with as many kinky people as Bosnia has to offer. You would be welcome to live in that house and be considered a part of a family.

In exchange for this person taking all of this time to satisfy all of your curiosity and the opportunity to learn all of these things, you would become the houseboy. This would give you first hand experience in what it is really like to serve someone. There would be no sex involved and the only play conducted would be those situations that everyone approved.

Does that offer sound intriguing?

Would it really matter if the person who made such an offer was a man or a woman?

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot
First of all, I am not so interested in BDSM lifestyle and community that I would choose to define my life by it.
I am interested only in one-on-one interactions, not in meeting all the kinksters in Bosnia.
By the way, Bosnia is very conservative country, and if people found out that I am active in such circles, this could have negative social consequences to me.
So I would probably not choose to live in a flat of someone who is extremely involved in kink scene in Bosnia.

In a hypothetical scenario that I live in another country where such things are more acceptable I still doubt that I would like to be any kind of houseboy,
regardless if it was offered by a woman or by a man. I have many other things to do in my life instead of being a houseboy.

For me BDSM and D/s is about intimate, romantic, sexual relationships which include some kink or power exchange.
I am interested in engaging in such relationships only with women.

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

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But that's my point.  There was none.  What part of that are you missing?  i think you are so stuck in your own paradigm that you are refusing to accept my reality.

What's your point? Are you trying to say that you were never attracted to your Domme, and that you were never aroused by her or by your submission?

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ORIGINAL: SocratesNot

For me BDSM and D/s is about intimate, romantic, sexual relationships which include some kink or power exchange.
I am interested in engaging in such relationships only with women.

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What's your point? Are you trying to say that you were never attracted to your Domme, and that you were never aroused by her or by your submission?



Yes!  How many times must i say that?