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RE: frustrated male subs - 7/3/2010 9:44:24 PM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

i am wondering, who these Women are?


Tops, bedroom dominants, fetishists, sadists, anyone who might not require a "twue sub".

quote:

Because IMO ... those who post here, represent a real cross section of intelligent life in the english speaking world.


You must not have done much reading here, or you'd know that the cross section represented is not limited to the intelligent.

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/3/2010 9:46:38 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Stop trying to get milk from the hardware store.



ROFL ... great analogy!

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/3/2010 9:52:41 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		So, why are you here again, HBS?

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/3/2010 9:56:29 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub

quote:

i am wondering, who these Women are?


Tops, bedroom dominants, fetishists, sadists, anyone who might not require a "twue sub".

quote:

Because IMO ... those who post here, represent a real cross section of intelligent life in the english speaking world.


You must not have done much reading here, or you'd know that the cross section represented is not limited to the intelligent.


You clearly, are not interacting, with the Dominant, switch and submissive Women here!

If I was to be indiscrete, I might just be able to identify, multiple Ladies in each area you list!

But I am not that stupid!

You have clearly just told me ...

you just don't treat women as anything more than what you want ...

And you know ... these Women are just too smart to interact with you, on a personal basis!

(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/3/2010 10:00:40 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub

quote:

i am wondering, who these Women are?


Tops, bedroom dominants, fetishists, sadists, anyone who might not require a "twue sub".

You must not have done much reading here, or you'd know that the cross section represented is not limited to the intelligent.

Ah, I think I get it now.  So the problem is that there aren't enough folks who are interested in bottoms, fetishists, masochists, and bedroom submissives. 

Well, I won't argue with that point.  Then again, I wouldn't ask for someone to settle for less than what they want.  If women are looking for a dynamic that exists in and out of the bedroom, I can't say that I see that as an issue. 


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/3/2010 10:01:34 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingOwnertoo


quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

Stop trying to get milk from the hardware store.



ROFL ... great analogy!


*thread hijack - sort of *

I had a friend who'd been in an abusive relationship. She kept saying "why can't she blah blah blah?" "What's wrong with me?" "Can't she just be kind to me?" and other nefariously self-deluding things. So I actually sent her to Home Depot to get milk. She spent about half an hour walking around the store asking every single employee where she could find milk there. (True story). It was an amazing experience for her. She truly got it in her bones. That experience stayed with her so that when she would date, she'd look at the person and say, "Is this a Home Depot person or can I get milk?"

Nothing like making manifest in the real world something that is just a concept.

*back to the topic:

If you can't get what you seek, change your ways. Nothing changes until something changes.

best,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 8:59:00 AM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

If you can't get what you seek, change your ways. Nothing changes until something changes.


What's really being suggested to most subs isn't just that they change their ways, but that they change what they seek.

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 9:01:05 AM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

If women are looking for a dynamic that exists in and out of the bedroom, I can't say that I see that as an issue. 


I don't think anybody would see that as an issue. What is an issue is women looking for no "dynamic", but merely a servant.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 9:48:45 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub

quote:

If women are looking for a dynamic that exists in and out of the bedroom, I can't say that I see that as an issue. 


I don't think anybody would see that as an issue. What is an issue is women looking for no "dynamic", but merely a servant.



There are several women in my area who are very successful at attracting servants, handymen, what have you. They toss them a "bone" of personal attention now and then.

What issue is that to you, anyway?

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 10:10:01 AM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub

quote:

If women are looking for a dynamic that exists in and out of the bedroom, I can't say that I see that as an issue. 


I don't think anybody would see that as an issue. What is an issue is women looking for no "dynamic", but merely a servant.



There are several women in my area who are very successful at attracting servants, handymen, what have you. They toss them a "bone" of personal attention now and then.

What issue is that to you, anyway?


If you have been following the discussion, you shouldn't need to ask such a question. It's not an issue "to me". It's an issue in the context of "frustrated male subs" and "frustrated female dominants".

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 10:15:33 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub

quote:

If women are looking for a dynamic that exists in and out of the bedroom, I can't say that I see that as an issue. 


I don't think anybody would see that as an issue. What is an issue is women looking for no "dynamic", but merely a servant.



There are several women in my area who are very successful at attracting servants, handymen, what have you. They toss them a "bone" of personal attention now and then.

What issue is that to you, anyway?


If you have been following the discussion, you shouldn't need to ask such a question. It's not an issue "to me". It's an issue in the context of "frustrated male subs" and "frustrated female dominants".


I have been following the discussion. You play the same tune every time you post. The truth/fact is, most of the male "subs" are no such thing. Therefore, they will never be a match for the female dominants.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 12:43:03 PM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub

quote:

If women are looking for a dynamic that exists in and out of the bedroom, I can't say that I see that as an issue. 


I don't think anybody would see that as an issue. What is an issue is women looking for no "dynamic", but merely a servant.



There are several women in my area who are very successful at attracting servants, handymen, what have you. They toss them a "bone" of personal attention now and then.

What issue is that to you, anyway?


If you have been following the discussion, you shouldn't need to ask such a question. It's not an issue "to me". It's an issue in the context of "frustrated male subs" and "frustrated female dominants".


I have been following the discussion. You play the same tune every time you post. The truth/fact is, most of the male "subs" are no such thing. Therefore, they will never be a match for the female dominants.


Right - female "dominants" - most of whom are also no such thing.

Sorry to hear that you've followed the discussion and still don't get it.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 2:32:28 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

Right - female "dominants" - most of whom are also no such thing.


_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 2:33:32 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Right - female "dominants" - most of whom are also no such thing.




Thanks, Hols!! Welcome to the world of my Imaginary Friends!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 2:36:51 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Right - female "dominants" - most of whom are also no such thing.




Thanks, Hols!! Welcome to the world of my Imaginary Friends!
thank you Hib...you are the epitome of an imaginary Domme!


_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 2:37:29 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Right - female "dominants" - most of whom are also no such thing.




Thanks, Hols!! Welcome to the world of my Imaginary Friends!
thank you Hib...you are the epitome of an imaginary Domme!



My imaginary subs certainly think so!!


_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 2:50:21 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

Right - female "dominants" - most of whom are also no such thing.




Thanks, Hols!! Welcome to the world of my Imaginary Friends!
thank you Hib...you are the epitome of an imaginary Domme!



My imaginary subs certainly think so!!



 (pinched from hollys post) -

cos thats funny!!! 

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 6:03:03 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2
so what youre saying is that alot of the male subs are probably bottoms in orientation, if only to start with.  learning submission is a bit like learning to walk, its there but you have to have a few goes before youre up and runing.

I've heard that a lot, but I don't think that accounts for it. I've had a couple of egalitarian kinky relationships with bottoms, and they didn't treat me as life-support for a whip, expect me to wear a corset 24/7, call me Goddess, or otherwise act in offensive ways. "Bottom" doesn't mean "incapable of having a relationship," "unrealistic fantasist," "uncaring," or "jerkass idiot." If someone is up-front about being primarily interested in S/M and bondage rather than service, that's fine. If they can't see me as a human being, I want nothing to do with them, and have no interest in attempting to re-educate them.

< Message edited by Andalusite -- 7/4/2010 6:04:16 PM >

(in reply to lally2)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 6:04:31 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2
so what youre saying is that alot of the male subs are probably bottoms in orientation, if only to start with.  learning submission is a bit like learning to walk, its there but you have to have a few goes before youre up and runing.

I've heard that a lot, but I don't think that accounts for it. I've had a couple of egalitarian kinky relationships with bottoms, and they didn't treat me as life-support for a whip, expect me to wear a corset 24/7, call me Goddess, or otherwise act in offensive ways. "Bottom" doesn't mean "incapable of having a relationship," "unrealistic fantasist," "uncaring," or "jerkass idiot."



Well said, Anda! Really, I think the core issue is that we are dealing with a lot of selfish jerks wanting fantasy fulfillment, and they are blocking the way for the guys that we really want to talk to.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to Andalusite)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: frustrated male subs - 7/4/2010 6:19:00 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		Thanks, Hibbie! When I was looking last year, I ran into a lot of the "frustrated subs" that had the expectations HBS mentioned. Even though I'm open to a LTR without power exchange, and I've played casually, I still need to connect at least as friends, and have interesting conversations, go do fun stuff together occasionally, and generally connect as people. Yes, it got a little frustrating and confusing that relatively few submissive men were able to offer what I wanted. There were a few who did, and since I'm a switch, I also went ahead and dated other switches and Dominant men, who were more likely to actually want to and be capable of connecting with me as a person. It's not that all submissive men have that attitude, just that the percentages ran very strongly that way. If you didn't count the one-liners or people who contacted me from out of state, about 90% of the Dominant and switch guys wrote interesting, literate, personal notes when they contacted me initially, compared to maybe 15% of the submissive men. I've been talking with two submissive men lately who are very interesting, intelligent, and seem to have a great sense of humour, so they are out there.

HBS, some men are simply undateable, regardless of orientation. I doubt many submissive or vanilla women would put up with someone who treats her like a blow-up doll, either. It's not that there aren't any tops or switches here who are open to someone without power exchange, although the percentages are shifted considerably in that direction compared to say, FetLife. From what I can tell, there's much more skew toward power dynamics on the forums than on the personals side.

< Message edited by Andalusite -- 7/4/2010 6:24:37 PM >

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 80
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