LaTigresse
Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
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I am going to TRY and give my long answer, now that I have time. Keep in mind, while I am reasonably intelligent and well read, my formal education is severly lacking. I also suck at remember facts or where I've read something. So if you want to argue my post and demand references or that I back up my summarizing with facts, you are SOL and may as well ignore the rest of my post. In addition I am a HUGE fan of people watching and behavioural observation.
It has been my observation that most people attack what opposes something they feel most strongly about. Things that they base a lot of their personal identity on, things that touch on their own insecurities.
It's obvious that our hormones play a HUGE role in our behaviour. Thousands, even hundreds, of years ago that role was usually beneficial. Today, much less so. The sad part is that somewhere along the line, the benefits of testosterone became better and the benefits of estrogen became weaker. When in reality, at least from where I sit, they just became excuses for bad behaviour.
Our physical differences (because let's face it we know less about the human brain than we know) and the havoc those differences wreak on our emotions are weakly celebrated, using them as excuses for bad and outdated behaviour, is the sad part.
I am huge for personal responsibility. I see this as being another area where personal responsibility is not taught, rather the weaker, using it as an excuse for bad behaviour is taught. Even I am guilty. How many times I have used my hormones as a laughing excuse for a bad emotional action....what a poor example to younger women that is. How many men use something like 'it just pissed me off' or something similar as an excuse for an act of anger or rage that was poorly managed.
It is my opinion that, rather than using excuses for the gender/hormonal (because that really is the root of the issue) differences, we should teach better coping skills. Because as long as we use the differences as excuses, as long as we celebrate the negative outcome of those differences.....we will have the backlash of the behaviour of that gender's demands for equality and equal treatment. Rather like an adult demanding to be treated as an adult but tossing a temper tantrum like a child.
Our lives have evolved, unfortunately the insecure will use whatever argument they can dig up to continue to promote strengths that are outdated. We twist those individual strengths around to mean 'better' and because men were physically stronger, they were able to bully their way into a false sense of being better and taking over the visible power structures. Women, being physically weaker and seen as lesser humans, evolved coping skills that were far more complex than most men today even get. Those that, at some level do, almost seem to fear them and deride those skills as being manipulative and weak. Even I do the same...........when in reality is was a very clever evolution. Women couldn't challenge men to a physical fight but boy, did they learn how to use their femininity (men's achillies heel) to control their men. Both the physical fighting and the manipulating should actively be taught OUT of our societies.
I laugh when I read arguments of 'natural order'. To explain the laugh.......envision a brand new, biggest, strongest, workhorse of a tractor. Then envision a sleek sexy European sedan. Not a 2 door sports car. Just a beautiful sexy car. Which is 'better'? Well, most would ask what you needed the vehicle to do, before they could answer. I am not going to take the car into the field, or try to pull a huge wagon full of grain. I will not take the tractor to go shopping or to drive the family to grandma's house for Easter dinner. So 'better' solely depends upon purpose. There is no natural selection involved. Men's bodies and temperament were more evolved to do heavy labour and protect. That STILL does not mean better or have anything to do with natural selection as far as one gender being better. It also doesn't mean one gender is more dominant or submissive. It only means one genders body and temperament are usually better suited to using their bodies in specific ways.
Just because nature caused male bodies to evolve to do more physical labour and protect their offspring and the well of their offspring no more gave them the right to use that same body to bully their way into power over those they were protecting and working with. It didn't give them the right to say their work was more important than the work of the physically weaker either. Unfortunately, insecurities in both genders, caused the divisions and power struggles. At some points in time, it would appear the male gender's insecure fights have secured their superiourity. If being a bully means superiour, then yes. But you could also say that the people/gender that learned to USE that to their advantages was the more superiour. Is the tractor superiour over the person using it to do the work?
Let me add.....neither does the women's strengths give them any more right to say they are, as a gender, superiour. Just different strengths and weaknesses.
While I am fully aware it is human nature that drives the constant struggle, there is no clear winner. Most of the time all I see is losers. Because until we learn to celebrate our unique differences and work with them while not using them as excuses for our bad behaviour, we will continue to struggle and we will all, to a degree, lose.
< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 7/24/2010 6:42:16 AM >
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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!
Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!
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