"I don't want to disclose my photo right now for privacy reasons"

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"I don't want to disclose my photo right now for p... - 10/20/2010 4:00:09 PM

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I'm getting this quite frequently as of late from subs who CMail me, offering their services. To me this is code, either for "I have something to hide", "I'm married and don't want them to be used against me as evidence in the future", "I think I'm THAT MUCH of a celebrity" or "I really think I'm THAT ugly". To me, it's becoming a blaringly red flag for "fantasy player" which as stated in my profile is clearly NOT what I'm looking for.

To my fellow sisters who are actively seeking, do you ever get the "privacy clause" from guys who initially proposition you when you ask them for a photo?

Guys that do this, do you have any other explanation that makes sense, other than what I've listed above?

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 4:48:54 PM

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Some people, most likely less than 1% do have some legit reasons -- I would guess. It could just be that they are a school teacher or something similar. I think if you have any job where kids are concerned, you need to be careful. If you run the local boy scout troup you also need to be careful.

That said, most of the time it also sends up that red flag for me. If you have reasons for not having a picture up, then you probably don't belong here... or at least that's my feeling -- particularly if you're trying to find partners.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ReginaMirus

I'm getting this quite frequently as of late from subs who CMail me, offering their services. To me this is code, either for "I have something to hide", "I'm married and don't want them to be used against me as evidence in the future", "I think I'm THAT MUCH of a celebrity" or "I really think I'm THAT ugly". To me, it's becoming a blaringly red flag for "fantasy player" which as stated in my profile is clearly NOT what I'm looking for.

To my fellow sisters who are actively seeking, do you ever get the "privacy clause" from guys who initially proposition you when you ask them for a photo?

Guys that do this, do you have any other explanation that makes sense, other than what I've listed above?

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(in reply to ReginaMirus)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 4:57:00 PM

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I get that. Truly, I do. Not everyone CAN place a photo on a profile, and that I understand.

What I DON'T get, however, is getting that response after we've exchanged pleasantries and I personally request a basic faceshot. Seriously, it's not like I'm asking them to pose naked ass up with a trumpet shoved up their ass (although I'm sure there are some out there that would be more than happy to oblige that request). THAT'S the point where I get the privacy clause.

It'd be pointless to require such a thing, I think. It's not like 99% of them even bother to actually read my profile, or would probably send me a fraudulent photo anyway if I asked for one.

(in reply to Madame4a)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 4:57:35 PM

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Yes, it absolutely does raise My eyebrows. I do know people who have had legitimate reasons for it, though more often than not, I tend to see it as oversensitivity. Rather than an issue where their job would be in jeopardy, it's comes out a lot more often that they are scared that someone from work might recognize them here if they post a photo. This doesn't tend to mesh well with Me, as I'm very vocal about being involved in munches and events. If it's somebody that is afraid to have their face seen, we're most likely not compatible.

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 4:58:02 PM

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You know it doesnt send a glaring red flag.. but if Ive been emailing back and forth and they are focused on the sexual aspect of service.. about how Im going to whip their naughty lil weenie till it throbs.. or when will the blackmail begin.. or no I cant give out my cell number because Im with Homeland Security and they moniter the line.. yeah I get a little wary... chuckles.
MsB.

< Message edited by Sylverdawn -- 10/20/2010 4:59:01 PM >

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 5:04:00 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ReginaMirus
Guys that do this, do you have any other explanation that makes sense, other than what I've listed above?

Yeah, my ex wife scans websites like this one, knowing I'm into D/s, trying to find my profiles so she can use them against me in court. I make the profile as detailed as possible without giving away who I am, and I don't use a photo of my face. It's not morally right that she could mess with me if she found me, but it's true.

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 5:11:01 PM

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I get that too, but do you say this to someone that you've been talking to for awhile, when she requests a photo of you?

(in reply to wittynamehere)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 5:17:30 PM

lizi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sylverdawn

You know it doesnt send a glaring red flag.. but if Ive been emailing back and forth and they are focused on the sexual aspect of service.. about how Im going to whip their naughty lil weenie till it throbs.. or when will the blackmail begin.. or no I cant give out my cell number because Im with Homeland Security and they moniter the line.. yeah I get a little wary... chuckles.
MsB.

Heh heh....I dated someone from here who is with Homeland Security. For real. I saw his ID upon our first meeting and also saw him on TV a bit later addressing the Senate. He's got torso pictures up on his profile for anyone to see and sent me a head shot when he first messaged me so I'd say the Homeland Security excuse can be disbelieved at this point. He did not give me his real name until we actually met, which was why I saw the ID at that point. He used an alias up to that point.

*Edited to add: I had his cell number, HS did not monitor it. In fact he called me from work several times on that cell to set up our meetings and tell me what he wanted me to dress in.

< Message edited by lizi -- 10/20/2010 5:21:54 PM >

(in reply to Sylverdawn)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 5:19:28 PM

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I'm Batman...

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(in reply to ReginaMirus)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 5:31:16 PM

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Lol, funny!

I guess I'll just chalk it up to I just don't get it. Apparently, it kills the wank factor when I get a real face shot of someone?

I dunno. I need to quit trying to figure out these weirdos.

(in reply to OttersSwim)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 5:32:51 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

I'm Batman...

I fucking knew it.

(Can you be Catwoman at the same time?)

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 6:20:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lizi

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sylverdawn

You know it doesnt send a glaring red flag.. but if Ive been emailing back and forth and they are focused on the sexual aspect of service.. about how Im going to whip their naughty lil weenie till it throbs.. or when will the blackmail begin.. or no I cant give out my cell number because Im with Homeland Security and they moniter the line.. yeah I get a little wary... chuckles.
MsB.

Heh heh....I dated someone from here who is with Homeland Security. For real. I saw his ID upon our first meeting and also saw him on TV a bit later addressing the Senate. He's got torso pictures up on his profile for anyone to see and sent me a head shot when he first messaged me so I'd say the Homeland Security excuse can be disbelieved at this point. He did not give me his real name until we actually met, which was why I saw the ID at that point. He used an alias up to that point.

*Edited to add: I had his cell number, HS did not monitor it. In fact he called me from work several times on that cell to set up our meetings and tell me what he wanted me to dress in.

Hi lizi
thanks for sharing this--I also have a government job that monitors my cell calls, emails etc. and I'm very careful about my photo because once it gets out there....it's out there. The fact that he took those risks are well....risks. I don't risk it. Not with a work cell. But almost all of us who work in Homeland Security/Govt have second cells and computers for personal use, so I give out my cell once I feel it's someone I can trust. Even some of my relatives/colleagues with top secret clearances don't worry too much about surveillance of their private email/cells. Same with my photo--I'm going to have to take a more appropriate photo for this site--one that doesn't clearly show my face--but I would totally send a photo to someone once we've emailed back and forth and especially if we're going to meet.

I understand when a woman doesn't want to send a photo right away, but if we're planning to meet, I think it's reasonable to expect both parties to share a recent photo. And by recent: the past 2 years. Can't tell you how many times I've met someone and their photo was more than 2 decades old!

(in reply to lizi)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 8:01:00 PM

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If someone doesn't want to share a photo after we have talked for a bit, I know they are not for me. I was out in the scene when I was teaching, and now I have other credentials. I can understand CAUTION, but paranoia crosses the line for me. The person that won't send me a pic will also not meet me at the munch because someone might see him. Having coffee. With a bunch of other folks who are talking about their grandchildren.

Sometimes the herd thins itself!

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 8:29:02 PM

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Coffee! Now I know why we have never met. I drink tea. Lighten upwith the photos. I never had one for a long time because I never took one of me. If it werent for LH my photo would not be on here now.

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 8:31:25 PM

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If they plan to meet you in real life, you'll find out what they look like eventually. Combine that with the "someone else sent out my nondescript vanilla photo" excuse, and they really have no reason to hide their faces in private emails.

I peg them pretty quickly as fantasy players, myself.

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(in reply to ReginaMirus)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 8:32:17 PM

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Anyone wants a photo of the Hill guy, they can have a self portrait. Just dont run screaming OK.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 8:34:19 PM

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I want to see Batman's photo. I think he's fake.

(in reply to Hillwilliam)

RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 9:46:58 PM

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I don't use a photo cuz I live in Smalltown USA, I would lose my job, and my kids would suffer because I'm freaky trying to hang in a vanilla world. If I could get paid for spanking peoples asses all day I wouldn't care at all who knew about me. That being said when I move to emails I had better get a pic, if you can't stand the look of the person you are making arrangements to play with, it would definitely make for an awkward meeting.

Hmmm...then again if they have a cute ass I probably could put a bag over their face and keep them bent over all night while I spank them

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 9:53:37 PM

MistressRosalyn

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Hill, I'd say you are Chicken, but that's obvious!
Seriously, it's October, and I need a good scare. Pony up a pic please, 'cause inquiring minds want to know!

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RE: "I don't want to disclose my photo right now f... - 10/20/2010 10:03:38 PM

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It wouldn't be a red flag if that were the only thing. However if there were other signs, you bet I would call it a red flag! Honestly if someone is that high in security, I really don't think I would want them as a partner because it just wouldn't suit me. Big brother down my back... no thanks. I can understand certain jobs and being careful, but too careful for too long and I'm not wasting anymore time. I will only chat online for so long and then it is time for some real in person action of some sort.

If they can't call me, can only call certain times and those times are never on holidays or evenings or weekends, or if they do they are short calls, show up only at certain times, etc... you bet no picture is going to add to my red flag going off all over the place and forget you buddy. I surely wouldn't play online with someone I couldn't see, if I were so inclined. No one gets that close until we are that close.

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