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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 3:16:00 PM

doll

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Don't worry about losing the weight, just be happy with yourself...that is all that matters. I have been sitting here reading this thread and have laughed my ass off at most of it. But.... Surrender.... you don't have to be rude to people just because they are not what you look for in a person physically. Things can happen to alter you and would you expect your significant other to dump you because she was no longer attracted to the physical you?? I am a bbw and proud of it. I don't ask men to like me despite it.... they will like me because of my personality. Looks aren't everything to everyone.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 3:19:16 PM

doll

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Actually there are a lot of men that are attracted to big women. Just because you aren't doesn't give you the right to think you can degrade anyone. You are just showing your ignorance and quite frankly.... I personally think that even IF you were cute, your attitude makes you ugly. Just my two cents, but damn stop being such an ass.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 3:30:33 PM

doll

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I do have to say though, in getting back to the OP's post.... the emails I hate are the ones that they just say "hi"... sighs.... not much to build a conversation on.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 3:54:58 PM

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I don't see why people always seem to complain about Doms on the message boards, at least thats the vibe Ive been getting....I dont think its fair...they complain about one liners....but frankly, and I can speak for myself here, I have written many a well thought out response to a sub (after carefully reading their profile) only to get nothing in response....it feels like such wasted time and opportunity...I at least have valorated in the past subs that say "no thank you".....so then, judging from this repeated experience, I have also fallen for the one liners, because to write anything else is a waste of time. By the way when I say one liners I dont refer to anything lewd or in bad taste, I usually refer to agreeing with something they write or having a similar taste for something in the lifestyle...I like to get to know people, but many don't, including subs, not just Doms...some subs are outright rude in having some sort of pre-determined set of who you are (yet they dont know you, quite a contradiction there) and one even told me she did not wish to chat because English was not my first language....if that isn't close minded, I don't know what is. I totally agree with mgdartist on this....

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 3:56:41 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: doll

I do have to say though, in getting back to the OP's post.... the emails I hate are the ones that they just say "hi"... sighs.... not much to build a conversation on.

Exactly, doll. If you contact someone, you really should make a "bit" of an effort. I no longer respond to emails with just "hi" or one liners, I have found the men behind them usually have nothing to say even when I respond. Not sure sometimes why they even bothered to make contact, LOL!!

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:04:01 PM

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, I have written many a well thought out response to a sub (after carefully reading their profile) only to get nothing in response....it feels like such wasted time and opportunity...I at least have valorated in the past subs that say "no thank you".....so then, judging from this repeated experience, I have also fallen for the one liners, because to write anything else is a waste of time. By the way when I say one liners I dont refer to anything lewd or in bad taste, I usually refer to agreeing with something they

It is a bit of catch 22, isn't it? I don't think you need to write a "book" for your first email, but 2-3 sentences aren't that hard :) One liners will fail with many people, and of course, writing too much in the beginning just wastes your time too. The person you contacted is going to take many things into consideration besides your email as to whether they would find you a potential match. Photo, age, height, area you live in, etc.
I can understand why many women do not respond at all to an email if there is no interest. Saying "no" to someone is hard. I know when I do it, I almost always get a response back asking "why?". Plus, any response seems to jump some guys into the chase, and they keep emailing you, even after you have said no, trying to talk you into meeting them. I am sure other women here know exactly what I am saying :)
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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:14:37 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fun2getspanked
I can understand why many women do not respond at all to an email if there is no interest. Saying "no" to someone is hard. I know when I do it, I almost always get a response back asking "why?". Plus, any response seems to jump some guys into the chase, and they keep emailing you, even after you have said no, trying to talk you into meeting them. I am sure other women here know exactly what I am saying :)

Gee, fun - you only get asked "why" when you say "no thanks"?? I typically get an email blasting me for being a bitch, not submissive, a player, etc ad nauseum - regardless of how polite I was in stating my lack of personal interest. And I generally attempt to make it plain WHY I'm not interested, and whether I would be willing to at least get to know them as a casual friend. (Granted, such is definately NOT the case when it's a rude, lewd, crude, or stupidity filled email in the first place, but those don't count and don't get responded to at all.)

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:15:18 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fun2getspanked

, I have written many a well thought out response to a sub (after carefully reading their profile) only to get nothing in response....it feels like such wasted time and opportunity...I at least have valorated in the past subs that say "no thank you".....so then, judging from this repeated experience, I have also fallen for the one liners, because to write anything else is a waste of time. By the way when I say one liners I dont refer to anything lewd or in bad taste, I usually refer to agreeing with something they

It is a bit of catch 22, isn't it? I don't think you need to write a "book" for your first email, but 2-3 sentences aren't that hard :) One liners will fail with many people, and of course, writing too much in the beginning just wastes your time too. The person you contacted is going to take many things into consideration besides your email as to whether they would find you a potential match. Photo, age, height, area you live in, etc.
I can understand why many women do not respond at all to an email if there is no interest. Saying "no" to someone is hard. I know when I do it, I almost always get a response back asking "why?". Plus, any response seems to jump some guys into the chase, and they keep emailing you, even after you have said no, trying to talk you into meeting them. I am sure other women here know exactly what I am saying :)
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fun2getspanked, thank you for the thoughtful response...I dont think I have written a book, rather a small paragraph...particularly when I have been interested in the past. In any case, I have seen many sub profiles that change when they say "no men" or "Im not looking" and then they are....so I think many subs are not even sure what they are seeking, and hence why men pursue them anyway....I have even asked subs with a very limited profile what they seek or are looking for and few ever answer, to me that indicates they dont know themselves. But you are right, it is a catch 22 as you say....but I tell submissives...just say "no thank you"...its short, polite, and to the point. I have never asked for details.

I need to add that some subs clearly "play" Doms in the sense that they act interested, they give you their msn messenger and yahoo messenger screen names, clearly as a way to sideline the Dom....that way they are never "online", and dont have to give any explanations...to me, that is much worse than saying "no thank you"...saves time for everyone. I say this because it has happened to me more than once...I almost have learned to expect it. Other Doms out there with this experience? or am I the only "lucky" one? lol

< Message edited by MasterKalif -- 6/7/2006 4:18:39 PM >

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:18:50 PM

doll

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I must say that I read all profiles before I respond back to anyone. If they don't care to take the time to fill out a profile why should I care to take the time to respond to them. Even if it is just a short 4 sentence paragraph about them... it is something to go on.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:31:12 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: doll
I am a bbw and proud of it. I don't ask men to like me despite it.... they will like me because of my personality. Looks aren't everything to everyone.

Not to mention Doll is absolutely georgous. Not just her personality which is important, but her over-all self. Beauty and personality. It doesnt get better than that. I am not just saying that because she is my best friend either, she truely is beautiful.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:36:57 PM

doll

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Awww.... thank you K. You are beautiful too. I just hate wankers that are so damn superficial. Especially the ones that aren't "10" 's themselves... IMHO.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:37:54 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: hizgeorgiapeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: fun2getspanked
I can understand why many women do not respond at all to an email if there is no interest. Saying "no" to someone is hard. I know when I do it, I almost always get a response back asking "why?". Plus, any response seems to jump some guys into the chase, and they keep emailing you, even after you have said no, trying to talk you into meeting them. I am sure other women here know exactly what I am saying :)

Gee, fun - you only get asked "why" when you say "no thanks"?? I typically get an email blasting me for being a bitch, not submissive, a player, etc ad nauseum - regardless of how polite I was in stating my lack of personal interest. And I generally attempt to make it plain WHY I'm not interested, and whether I would be willing to at least get to know them as a casual friend. (Granted, such is definately NOT the case when it's a rude, lewd, crude, or stupidity filled email in the first place, but those don't count and don't get responded to at all.)

LOL! I used to get those emails too, so now my profile is very, very to the point as to what I am seeking and what works for me. Yes, I get a lot less emails, but that is OK, as the ones I am not getting probably wouldn't have worked out anyway.
If someone is not a match for me, (for whatever reason), my reply now is usually something along the lines of:

Thank you so much for your email, alas, I don't think we are a good match, but I wish you much success in your own search :)

That way, I don't have to hurt feelings pointing out what I didn't like, or what would be a deal breaker, etc,. and they don't get upset, grin!
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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:46:18 PM

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I had a sub write me the other day that said "Now I know where all the fat chicks have gone, they became Doms, you look like John Goodman" ROTF!! I laughed and replied "Well, actually I have been told I look more like John Candy, but thanks for the email wanker". <rolls eyes> I just hit delete....NEXT!

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:48:27 PM

doll

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OMG...K... now that you mention it....(rubs chin thoughtfully)..... nope don't see John Candy. He wasn't good enough for you anyway.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:48:48 PM

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MasterKalif:

Write a generic paragraph about yourself that you can cut and paste from and then customize it for each person you contact by indicating what caught your eye. Anyone expecting more than that from a first contact has their head up their ass.

There are thousands of sub women out there, so don't sweat it. Subs like to think they have the upper hand in the numbers game but I seriously doubt it. There's a huge difference between a Dom and a HNG. Personally, I'd say many Doms have too much HNG in them also.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 4:52:38 PM

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i hate to say this but john candie is in the same place Elvis is, and if anyone is seeing either or of these person, maybe it is time you fine someone to speak with, they have meds for that now i understand

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 5:13:10 PM

doll

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We can give the idiots the meds, but we can't make them take them...sighs... nice thought though.

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 5:36:09 PM

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Don't open random chats with people on the chatroom asking "ar you femme?" when you have absolutly no idea who the person is, like what just happened to me five minutes ago.

< Message edited by Tempestv -- 6/7/2006 5:39:41 PM >

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/7/2006 11:30:31 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Chaingang

MasterKalif:

Write a generic paragraph about yourself that you can cut and paste from and then customize it for each person you contact by indicating what caught your eye. Anyone expecting more than that from a first contact has their head up their ass.

There are thousands of sub women out there, so don't sweat it. Subs like to think they have the upper hand in the numbers game but I seriously doubt it. There's a huge difference between a Dom and a HNG. Personally, I'd say many Doms have too much HNG in them also.

Thanks, yes I tried that too, however I guess I realized (late late in the game) that there are few of us lifestylers in RI...thank you for the advice and the good wishes, unbelieving to me I am now speaking to a sub and it is getting serious, so I am happy. Hehehe....yes they think they have the upper hand :) by the way...what is a "HNG"?

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RE: A "hint" for Doms looking for subs... - 6/8/2006 9:24:05 AM

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by the way...what is a "HNG"?

LOL! I was going to ask the same thing! What is it :)
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