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RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 1:16:25 PM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather


and the fact that in your view admitting wrongdoing absolves one of all blame even when one persists in the wrongdoing is unsurprising, rather the opposite, i fucking expected it from you.



I saw not a word from DD that indicated anything like that. You got that wrong there Hannah.

agirl


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RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 1:26:13 PM   
Amygdalin


Posts: 69
Joined: 6/28/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

(and btw? MP would have had more class than a skit like that...)



Greedy, you are right. Monty Python had way more class. I got caught up in making a point and totally lost my head there. My bad.

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Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 2:20:20 PM   
HannahLynHeather


Posts: 2950
Joined: 4/4/2011
From: where it's at
Status: offline
quote:

I saw not a word from DD that indicated anything like that. You got that wrong there Hannah.
really, maybe you should go back and reread what he said, it was quite clear to me, but try putting on your glasses this time.

oh fuck it, i'll just quote the relevant part.
quote:

You are, at least, owning up to the fact that what you are doing is wrong and not attempting to argue and justify it as being right.

In light of that, I figure I will be the one person who actually answers your question.
thus. dude says he knows its wrong, and doesn't try justify it, so because of that <that's what "in light of that" means> dd decides to give the guy advice in how to successfully continue to do wrong. seems pretty fucking unequivocal to me, if you interpret this differently, please parse it out for me, i'd be interested in seeing the line of reasoning required to do that.

as an a side, hammy does in fact try to justify it repeatedly, yet dd here overlooks that in his rush to support the twit and claim to be the only one to do so.


_____________________________

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i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

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Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:07:39 PM   
DecadentDesire


Posts: 234
Joined: 6/18/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

quote:

But...hey...maybe next time you will "get" me.
i fucking hope not, i'd rather get the aids thank you very much. but it is cute the way you pretend to be an intelligent person when you clearly aren't. in your failed attempt at a defense of what you said to counter my statement you left out the key phrase, either because you are to fucking stupid to realize it was the key, or you hoped everybody else on here was.

i'm not, sucks to be you.

here it is: "In light of that"



Ahh, temper, temper....easy now. Someone might think I am starting to get to you with such vicious responses like that. This is only going to make it ten times harder for you to posture yourself like you are pulling my strings or manipulating me into responding to you.

quote:

dude says he knows its wrong, and doesn't try justify it, so because of that <that's what "in light of that" means> dd decides to give the guy advice in how to successfully continue to do wrong. seems pretty fucking unequivocal to me, if you interpret this differently, please parse it out for me, i'd be interested in seeing the line of reasoning required to do that.


Yes, sugarfluffybunnypoo, I used the words "In light of that" as in "In light of the fact that you managed to handle yourself pretty well in this thread, I am going to go out of my way to answer your question, even though I find your behavior questionable".

I'm sorry I left that out. I didn't realize you were making such a huge assumption about a single phrase. I'll make a point to provide a break down of everything I write for your understanding from now on. I can also use alternating bright colors to simulate crayons if that will help.

I don't think that will be neccessary though. You are clearly smarter than me and capable of figuring out that people use "In light of" to reference the reasons they previously listed, not the ones you made up and projected into their writing.

I gave him advice for the following reasons...
  • He asked a question about a specific topic, not advice on his relationship.
  • I liked the guy. He manged to calmly call you out on your bullshit. Someone like that can't be all that bad.
  • He stated that he did not want to go into the specifics of his relationship. He also asked to not be judged. His relationship is none of my business. He is not asking me for advice on his relationship. He is not asking me to approve his behavior. He has asking for some help in one particular area. Typically, when people ask me to stay out of their affairs, I do. I am not in the habit of running my mouth off, hurling insults and condemnations about a situation I know nothing about, because I have an Internet connection and an opinion.
  • Even if I were to feel the need to speak out against him, everyone in this thread has already done a fine job of pointing out how wrong he is. The horse is dead.
  • If he was commiting murder, I would intervene in anyway I could. If he was commiting theft, I would do the same. If he was commiting rape, he would be dead. If he is participating in adultery, it is not within my own personal code to get involved unless they are personal friends of mine. This is a matter between the individuals involved. I don't make exceptions to that, because I can run off my mouth off on the Internet with no consequence. As such, I am being indifferent and answering the question without involving myself in the issue of adultery.
I have no doubt that you are going to respond to this, calling it bullshit, because I follow a different code and set of standards then your own.

So just to make sure we are absolutely clear, I am going to speak in a style that I know you can understand...

Fuck you and whatever code of behavior you are trying to impose on me

quote:

as an a side, hammy does in fact try to justify it repeatedly, yet dd here overlooks that in his rush to support the twit and claim to be the only one to do so.


Mmmm...no...not supporting....or condemning. Indifference.

Everyone has reasons for doing something. EVERYONE.

There is a huge difference between saying "I am right in what I am doing and here is the reasons why" and "I know I am wrong, but I am doing it anyways for these reasons".

I see the latter when I read his posts.


< Message edited by DecadentDesire -- 8/29/2011 3:30:07 PM >

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RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:14:25 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		sorry but the moment you come on a public forum website and air your dirty laundry even if it is in vague terms you've just made it everyone's business. If you don't like what people have to say then don't post it.


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Everything has changed

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:19:14 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xCallMeSirx



I'll just keep to myself what I'd really like to call you. Rest assured it would never be "sir". However, there may be folks reading this who would benefit from this sort of information so I'll be posting for them.

~~~~~~~~

A rope harness under the clothing, especially something like hemp, can help to keep ones focus on their dominant.

Rituals and mantras can be done daily or at specific times of the day. Something I've always thought was cool is doing a ritual or mantra at the same time that the dominant is doing something also ritualistic (perhaps at the time the dominant usually eats dinner or something like that).

You can twofer the above. Mantra and rope harness at a specific time of day.

Change shower or bath habits so that the one on the kneel side has to do things in a way that is unusual or different from their norm. My habit is wash my hair (on the days I wash my hair) first, rinse.. wash it again, rinse then condition my hair while I wash the rest of me. I wash my right side arm first (guess cuz I'm right handed!) then my left side arm and work my way down so if I had to wash the left side first, that's something I would have to think about doing and would keep me focused on why I was doing it all backwards. Things like that which tweak the normal just a little bit.

Get a copy of the Kama Sutra. Roll a couple of dice then write out in detail what you 'see' on the page number that correlates to the dice number you rolled.

Brush your teeth with the wrong hand. You have to go really slow and careful with this one so you don't poke yourself in the roof of your mouth with your toothbrush. If you do poke yourself, hopefully it will hurt. If it hurts be appreciative of the pain while you have it and remember it fondly when it's gone.

Roll out 10 six-sided dice. Whatever number you come up with, put that many grains of rice on the floor then kneel on them for a period of time TBD by your dominant or by another random dice roll.

That's just a few off the top of my head.

I hope that helps someone who is in a relationship that works for ALL the parties involved and not just the secretive few who think that cheating is optional and that no one will get hurt. Someone almost always gets hurt. How sad that is when it's so easy to avoid.







< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 8/29/2011 3:32:02 PM >

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Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


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RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:22:43 PM   
DecadentDesire


Posts: 234
Joined: 6/18/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

sorry but the moment you come on a public forum website and air your dirty laundry even if it is in vague terms you've just made it everyone's business. If you don't like what people have to say then don't post it.



He came on this public forum, asking a very specific question.

He was asked a question about why he doesn't get to see her frequently.

He, instead of avoiding answering, politely requested that it not be brought into the discussion.

People responded by making the accusation of cheating.

Instead of just vanishing, he owned up to the fact that he was in a relationship where the other partner was cheating and politely asked that it be left out of the discussion and people stay on the topic of hand.

Everyone ignored that request and proceeded to jack up the entire thread, making it about him and his relationship.

Sorry, I don't equate what happened here to "airing your dirty laundry". More like "being pushed to air your dirty laundry".


< Message edited by DecadentDesire -- 8/29/2011 3:23:59 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:30:36 PM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline 		I like the way your mind works Bita, can I be your subbie?

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The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

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Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:33:59 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

I like the way your mind works Bita, can I be your subbie?

Now, that depends.. how do you feel about blood, shaving your head and needles?



_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to zephyroftheNorth)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:41:03 PM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline 		That depends, whose blood and what would you be doing with the needles?

_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

Team Troll Trollop
Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
Member: Subbie Mafia
Member: Hibbie's Hotties

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 3:48:28 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		Hannah, am I to understand that your passion in this post is due to the many
times in your past in which you did things that were not only illegal and dangerous,
but also in stark contradiction to the morals you are trying to preach here?
And this is somehow a way to redeem yourself?

So the guy is of questionable character, big deal? He isn't the first, and
he certainly won't be the last. You gave your opinion already, several in fact.
But to continually debate the wisdom or intent in anyone elses post here makes
it seem like you have more invested in this fight than you ought to.

Of course, if this is what you need to get through the day, then carry on.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to HannahLynHeather)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 4:00:06 PM   
JanahX


Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline 		this thread is awesome.




Attachment (1)

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The second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.


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RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 4:21:22 PM   
MrRodgers


Posts: 10540
Joined: 7/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

monogamy has fuck all to do with it. it's cheating. you show an amazing depth of ignorance by equating cheating to polyamory, fuck you. i live in a poly arrangement, but if one of us starts sleeping around on the qt that's still cheating, it's just cheating on several people instead of one. and that's not even the major point of contention, this is:
quote:

Yes he...HE is being hypocritical saying it is against HIS morals by still playing
it's not just hypocritical it's a fucking scum move, to do something you believe is wrong just because it's fun.

the rest of your post just is irrelevant ignorant insulting blather.


You are living in a poly of several unmarried women ? If that's the case and by now it sure appears that way, then your affair doesn't even come close to 'equating' to this post.

The entire concept and short history of monogamy and its modern presumptuousness in playing meaning betrayal...has everything to do with this post.

I've known married couples where they both fuck whoever the fuck they wanna fuck and they are happiest most beautifully married and fucked people I know and...for decades. So much for the great Christian sanctity of monogamous marriage.


(in reply to HannahLynHeather)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 4:29:01 PM   
coookie


Posts: 541
Joined: 10/25/2010
Status: offline 		The point is, Mr Rodgers, is that this is an arrangement that they have consented to. Cheating is called as such because it breaks the rules, not set out by society, but by the individuals in the relationship. Yes it is true that many default to the societal expectation of monogamy but the two people are the ones that decide the rules. When one goes outside of the rules, it is cheating.

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Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 5:03:29 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		Well, if you meant to say something like this:
quote:

In light of the fact that you managed to handle yourself pretty well in this thread, I am going to go out of my way to answer your question, even though I find your behavior questionable

Why did you say something like this:
quote:

Well, you managed to handle the criticism here pretty well. You are, at least, owning up to the fact that what you are doing is wrong and not attempting to argue and justify it as being right.

In light of that, I figure I will be the one person who actually answers your question.

That would be a bit of a conundrum if we were dealing with anybody other than you. But in this case, as per your usual practice you are rewording what you wrote in order to completely alter it's meaning. Either you are dishonest or you are linguistically inept. Myself, I am of the opinion that it really isn't an either/or question, rather it is an "and" that should be used here.
quote:

I see the latter when I read his posts.

Totally unsurprising.

quote:

This is only going to make it ten times harder for you to posture yourself like you are pulling my strings or manipulating me into responding to you.
I have no idea if Hannah is thinking she is doing that, but I am. And so far I have had a 100% success rate. Come on now, don't be ruining my record, write back how I am insecure and only posting this in order to try make myself look better than you, something a cockroach would be able to do after the lack of morality you've shown in this post.

Oh and just by the by, it would seem she is having some success getting you to post, assuming that is her intent. Where do I get that idea? Why from your own words:
quote:

I liked the guy. He manged to calmly call you out on your bullshit. Someone like that can't be all that bad.
Too bad you can't do the same eh?

God you are funny, now come back all indignant and call me an asshat.


_____________________________

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Ha Ha...Charade you are!

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Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 5:08:33 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

He was asked a question about why he doesn't get to see her frequently.
No he wasn't. Once again DD's version of events does not equate with what actually occurred.


_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


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Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 5:10:48 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

I've known married couples where they both fuck whoever the fuck they wanna fuck and they are happiest most beautifully married and fucked people I know and...for decades.
Which does not equate to what was being discussed in this thread, now does it?

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to MrRodgers)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 5:50:42 PM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

quote:

I saw not a word from DD that indicated anything like that. You got that wrong there Hannah.
really, maybe you should go back and reread what he said, it was quite clear to me, but try putting on your glasses this time.

oh fuck it, i'll just quote the relevant part.
quote:

You are, at least, owning up to the fact that what you are doing is wrong and not attempting to argue and justify it as being right.

In light of that, I figure I will be the one person who actually answers your question.
thus. dude says he knows its wrong, and doesn't try justify it, so because of that <that's what "in light of that" means> dd decides to give the guy advice in how to successfully continue to do wrong. seems pretty fucking unequivocal to me, if you interpret this differently, please parse it out for me, i'd be interested in seeing the line of reasoning required to do that.

as an a side, hammy does in fact try to justify it repeatedly, yet dd here overlooks that in his rush to support the twit and claim to be the only one to do so.



And?

Forget the *rushing to support*, that's irrelevant and is only what you've decided to interpret it as.

He did expand with.....quote

I fail to see where I said he was absolved of all blame. My only statements were a critique of how he handled himself and my own admittance to finding someone owning up to the fact that he is contradicting his own values is somewhat more palpable than someone who falsely attempts to twist his own moral code to justify his behavior as righteous.

His participation in her cheating is his choice. I'm not condoning or approving of it....unquote.

As far as I can tell, he wasn't *absolving* at all........he was just more apt to be helpful because of the reasons stated.

Personally, I don't give a rat's arse WHY people may be seeking something outside of their relationships. I've known good, decent people make choices of this kind and they weren't all the shits under the sun at all.

Life isn't as simple as you tend to say so often.....Life is often very complicated.

agirl










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Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 5:52:17 PM   
xCallMeSirx


Posts: 27
Joined: 8/14/2011
Status: offline 		Wow,

I learned a lot by making one post. To those that helped me with tips here or sent me a personal message, Thank You Very Much!

For those that attacked and ridiculded me, I thank you too. I know this is wrong and now I'm actually thinking about it, which will eventually result in my morality surfacing and forcing me to make a change.

I am meeting a single girl Thursday night, she is not into BDSM but that might be OK. I am already getting bored with how needy my sub is becoming. It feels like high maintenance to constantly tell her what to do and when. At first her submission was very exciting because I have never had this kind of power over another human before. The sweet taste of Dominance is turning bitter quickly.

Hopefully the thread won't die anytime soon, this has been educational and entertaining as hell.

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Playing with Sub when your away - 8/29/2011 5:55:20 PM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline
quote:

You are living in a poly of several unmarried women ? If that's the case and by now it sure appears that way, then your affair doesn't even come close to 'equating' to this post.


In what way does poly equate cheating? Poly is still faithful, just to more than one person.

_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

Team Troll Trollop
Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
Member: Subbie Mafia
Member: Hibbie's Hotties

(in reply to MrRodgers)
Profile   Post #: 80
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