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RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 4:08:50 AM

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Which I believe, tends to be the greater percentage of s-types, especially of the male variety, online.

Based upon what I've seen here, I am going to guess that most submissive men that place service before kink and sex, are out walking about, in relationships, serving. I think it is often the ones trying to sneak their kink priorities in through the back door of submission, that end up here.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Rule)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 4:19:01 AM

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quote:

So I read through most of the comments in here made by the dominant ladies and I think it has reinforced my observation and my conclusion. They want a slave or sub that will not cost them anything.

Not wanting freeloaders does not equal:

quote:

The money issue is more important that the submission.

(in reply to thezigg)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:00:57 AM

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Using fast reply...

Just an FYI. There are PLENTY of self proclaimed s-types of both genders that are looking for a sugar daddy or mommy. Some will find it. Based upon what I've seen, there are more self proclaimed d and m types of the male gender that are willing to be a female s type's money bitch than women of the d and m type. I am sure that the free loading male gender s types are the ones most upset with this. Too fucking bad. Apparently females of all types are less willing to put up with this shit than the males of all types are.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to kalikshama)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:04:10 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: rulemylife

A submissive is there to serve.

It requires no work on the part of the dominant.

And I provide for myself very well.

My complaint is all the so-called dommes who expect me to provide for them.

Switch sometime, then report back.

ANY relationship requires a fair amount of work on the part of all involved, and at the heart of all of this, these ARE relationships, whether their romantic based or otherwise. How long do you remain friends with someone who puts no effort into your friendship and constantly takes? Not very long. For a more BDSM based example - learning safety and how to use equipment like floggers, single tails, coming up with scenes - requires a lot of time and effort on a Dominant's part. I've spent countless dollars and years learning what it is that I do.

To assert that there is NO WORK on the part of the Dominant to make a relationship work is simply ridiculous and shows a deep lack of understanding of relationships in general, let alone BDSM based ones.

As has been said - it's not about being able to support a domme financially - it's about taking responsibility for your own life and security, and bringing that as part of the whole package to the RELATIONSHIP, because once again - this is a RELATIONSHIP.

Here's a quirk - because of our chosen career paths, I make a significant amount more than my husband does, so I pay more of the household bills. I don't have a problem with this, because he loves his job, is very good at it, and works very hard. It supports him comfortably. It's part of who he is - and that's why it fine with me.

If, however, he came to me tomorrow and said he wasn't going to work anymore but was going to stay home and "keep house" - well, we'd have a serious problem that would end with either him going back to work or getting kicked to the curb.

< Message edited by SadisticMs2 -- 9/7/2011 5:13:58 AM >

(in reply to rulemylife)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:08:16 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

What disappoints me in this thread is not so much the focus that Women here have on the importance of getting the subs money AS WELL as their service but also the number of patronising and condescending comments that the Women here have made to the men on this thread. it s really a sad reflection that 40 years on from the time Women rightly revolted against patronising patriarchy that they now turn the same patronising attitude on men. And its not just confined to this thread i see it everywhere all around me even on tv exemplified in ads such as even a man can do it, the point being that the male is an idiot but even idiots are capable of something whereas Women if so portrayed on Tv there would be riots it wouldnt be accepted it would be seen as demeaning yet it s ok to constantly and with impunity to demean men. And then the Women talk about hypocrisy what could be more hypocritical than the way Women treat men today
kevin

And this is why you won't find a domme to serve.

We don't want your money kiddo....we want you to be a well rounded, self supporting individual who is interesting to be around and brings the full package to our lives.

And that's where you have your epic fail, because being willing to spend a few hours a week washing dishes does not a relationship make.

I'm going to guess that you have dated very little in the past and have an extremely hard time maintaining ANY kind of relationship, from friends to family. And certainly not with females.

As far as men acting like idiots....well, you're really not doing much to help that cause, are you? You can't hate women AND expect them to want to take care of you full time....not going to happen.

< Message edited by SadisticMs2 -- 9/7/2011 5:14:53 AM >

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:30:41 AM

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Is there any limit to a Woman's condescension of men? We dont want your money kiddo. How more condescending can a person get when relating to someone else. And Women think men are the one's with chips on their shoulders. Please. Have a look in the mirror Ladies. Thats all i will say
kevin

(in reply to SadisticMs2)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:33:15 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

What disappoints me in this thread is not so much the focus that Women here have on the importance of getting the subs money AS WELL as their service but also the number of patronising and condescending comments that the Women here have made to the men on this thread. it s really a sad reflection that 40 years on from the time Women rightly revolted against patronising patriarchy that they now turn the same patronising attitude on men. And its not just confined to this thread i see it everywhere all around me even on tv exemplified in ads such as even a man can do it, the point being that the male is an idiot but even idiots are capable of something whereas Women if so portrayed on Tv there would be riots it wouldnt be accepted it would be seen as demeaning yet it s ok to constantly and with impunity to demean men. And then the Women talk about hypocrisy what could be more hypocritical than the way Women treat men today
kevin

If you change the word from "men" to "kevin" your statement makes so much more sense. The reason for that is the fact that your comments have been illogical and rude.

Also, the misogyny again? Seriously? Even with your unusual expectation (and, there could be a Domme out there into it), it's your attitude that's holding you back. Why would ANY woman want a man who has no respect for her gender?

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:34:58 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Is there any limit to a Woman's condescension of men? We dont want your money kiddo. How more condescending can a person get when relating to someone else. And Women think men are the one's with chips on their shoulders. Please. Have a look in the mirror Ladies. Thats all i will say
kevin

I'm not condescending of all men. I am probably condescending to you because really - you so invite it.

:-)

If you really don't want to be a well rounded adult, you don't have to be one. But don't be surprised if other adults don't want to spend much time with you, and especially don't want you in their home.

< Message edited by SadisticMs2 -- 9/7/2011 5:36:44 AM >

(in reply to lobodomslavery)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 5:47:10 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: thezigg

So I read through most of the comments in here made by the dominant ladies and I think it has reinforced my observation and my conclusion. They want a slave or sub that will not cost them anything. I'm not saying that is a right or wrong way of thinking. It just appears to be what it is. The money issue is more important that the submission. If not more important at least just as important.
I haven't read as many dominant guys profiles or posts but I get the feeling from the ones I have that for them the submission is much more important than the money. If they have a hot little slave girl at home taking care of the house and ready with a drink and a willing body they don't care as much if she is paying her own way.

Oh, and flaming me for bringing this up as a discussion is kind of pointless. I'm interested in everyones opinion but couldn't give a shit if you think I'm a idiot. Sorry, but my ability to not care about what people that don't have anything constructive to say is one of my better features. If you can't respect the people that put down what they think then why don't you go and ad another thoughtless entry in the guys sucking guys thread.

Where the heck did you get the bolded comment above from this thread? We must have been reading different threads. Wanting someone to be self sufficient, which is what the women who responded here said they wanted, does not in any way mean money is important. It's simply wanting your partner to an adult and to have the attractive quality of taking care of themselves, much like washing regularly and being well groomed. You can't take something and extrapolate an entirely different concept from it and then say the two things are equal.

OP, you say you are seeing an imbalance between the genders in what they will accept as far as submissive behaviors in the finances dept. You're saying when it comes to to putting your money where your mouth is, that men will accept in effect paying for their companionship. Well...duh. Whoever has more options generally will choose things that have more benefits to themselves. There is the simple fact that there are more men in any orientation on sites like this looking for women then there are women looking for men. Therefore, if a women gets more of a choice, she can choose more things off of her list of what comprises an attractive partner. If financial self-sufficiency is on that list then she chooses it. If men seem to you to be more accepting of supporting their female companions. it's because men have to basically suck up more negatives in this situation because they have less choices.

Supply and demand. It's a simple concept. It's got nothing to do with some label that you are trying so hard to stick onto half of the human race and failing at, its just having more choices. If you had a choice between food out of a can or a lucious, home cooked dinner which would you choose? There is nothing wrong with choosing the better of two options if the choice is there, you're trying to make it look as though women are up to some nefarious purpose by choosing what they consider to be better....that's not slimy, it's smart. If you could get two cars for the same price, you'll be leaving with the one that is the better value to you.

(in reply to thezigg)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 6:34:49 AM

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work ethic noun

a belief in the moral benefit and importance of work and its inherent ability to strengthen character.

Here's the hitch. You can't claim to have a work ethic. You have to SHOW it, day in, day out. No excuses. No "if only someone would give me the chance". Just do it.

Need we say more?

< Message edited by SadisticMs2 -- 9/7/2011 6:40:23 AM >

(in reply to risktaker9)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 6:38:45 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Using fast reply...

Just an FYI. There are PLENTY of self proclaimed s-types of both genders that are looking for a sugar daddy or mommy. Some will find it. Based upon what I've seen, there are more self proclaimed d and m types of the male gender that are willing to be a female s type's money bitch than women of the d and m type. I am sure that the free loading male gender s types are the ones most upset with this. Too fucking bad. Apparently females of all types are less willing to put up with this shit than the males of all types are.

QFT

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to LaTigresse)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 6:54:11 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: thezigg

So I read through most of the comments in here made by the dominant ladies and I think it has reinforced my observation and my conclusion. They want a slave or sub that will not cost them anything. I'm not saying that is a right or wrong way of thinking. It just appears to be what it is. The money issue is more important that the submission. If not more important at least just as important.
I haven't read as many dominant guys profiles or posts but I get the feeling from the ones I have that for them the submission is much more important than the money. If they have a hot little slave girl at home taking care of the house and ready with a drink and a willing body they don't care as much if she is paying her own way.

Oh, and flaming me for bringing this up as a discussion is kind of pointless. I'm interested in everyones opinion but couldn't give a shit if you think I'm a idiot. Sorry, but my ability to not care about what people that don't have anything constructive to say is one of my better features. If you can't respect the people that put down what they think then why don't you go and ad another thoughtless entry in the guys sucking guys thread.

I think risktaker's comments probably already covered quite a bit of what I am about to say here, but I'm going to give it a shot anyway.

One of the things that I think is getting skipped in this thread is that too many of the respondents are trying to jump straight to the end. There's very little being mentioned about what some would call the courting phase. Most of the D/s or M/s folks out there that I know don't go from hello to moving somebody in their house the next day. I'm looking at it more from exactly what it the s-type doing during this time that the people involved are determining compatibility? Are they just sitting back waiting for somebody to move them into their house or are they being a productive member of society in some way? For Me, the latter is just plain more appealing.

Also, there's a severe lack of looking at an exit plan on this thread. In My opinion, it's one of the substantial reasons for a s-type to work outside the home. If things don't work out, the s shouldn't be in a position of being destitute. We just had a train wreck of a thread a couple of months back that the gal had no idea of how she was going to start over because she had no means to do so.

It's not so much that I think people don't want the s-type not to cost them anything. I think it's more of a cost to benefit ratio. In doing so, you really have to look at the household the service is being performed in and is it really worth it. For example, a household such as Mine where there are no small children to be looked after, by no stretch of the imagination, would be worth it to Me to have a full time person to keep it up. If the D/s part were taken out of it and I was looking at it from the perspective of having a full time maid, it would be flat out stupid. Sorry, but from a cost to benefit ratio, that's what you're really looking at.

Most submissives of either gender don't come ready made to serve in a house like Mine. There might be a dozen or so from the boards that I wouldn't have to invest in them in so way to get them up to speed. The ones who think the extent of serving means keeping the house up and a drink in hand for Me is all that's required would already be left in the dust.

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to thezigg)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 7:48:53 AM

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What LP said.

Short story men: have a life. Have a job, skills, a bank account, a way of taking care of yourself WITHOUT someone else. Then come to me. It's okay to not be rich, not have a glamourous job/career, not be a homeowner. But don't be living like a teenager/student unless you ARE one.

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(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 7:57:52 AM

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I still think Kevin should give my cleaning service idea a whirl. Hell, if he's canny enough, he could have Dommes all over town. *And* he'd be earning some money. Multiple birds with one stone.

Hmmm. Might even try it myself. I feel a new thread coming on . . . .

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(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 8:00:39 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I still think Kevin should give my cleaning service idea a whirl. Hell, if he's canny enough, he could have Dommes all over town. *And* he'd be earning some money. Multiple birds with one stone.

Hmmm. Might even try it myself. I feel a new thread coming on . . . .

I suspect that might be too much like having a real job.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 8:02:05 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I still think Kevin should give my cleaning service idea a whirl. Hell, if he's canny enough, he could have Dommes all over town. *And* he'd be earning some money. Multiple birds with one stone.

Hmmm. Might even try it myself. I feel a new thread coming on . . . .

now YOU, I'd hire...

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polysnortatious
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Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 8:08:13 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I still think Kevin should give my cleaning service idea a whirl. Hell, if he's canny enough, he could have Dommes all over town. *And* he'd be earning some money. Multiple birds with one stone.

Never gonna happen. It's much too sensible.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to PeonForHer)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 8:09:24 AM

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Thank you, Greedy!

I'm toying with the idea.

Adverts delivered to local homes - that's the best way. I get most of my building-type work that way.

"Cleaner and factotum* - £5.00 per hour (whatever's the minimum wage)"

"Free consultation" (So you get to meet the person before starting the job.)

*A term meaning 'I'll do anything', but not sounding too naff. Maybe something better. Perhaps the word 'peon'. Heh.

Something on the advert that hints, very subtly, at your being a malesub after a femdom. But *very* subtle.

Crude, all this - needs refining.

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(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 8:10:29 AM

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*sad face*

so far away.....

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to PeonForHer)

RE: Big difference between master and mistresses lookin... - 9/7/2011 8:36:37 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I still think Kevin should give my cleaning service idea a whirl. Hell, if he's canny enough, he could have Dommes all over town. *And* he'd be earning some money. Multiple birds with one stone.

Hmmm. Might even try it myself. I feel a new thread coming on . . . .

Come on down, I have some...cleaning...yeah, cleaning!

~~

Seriously, though... this kind of thing won't fly for the would be sub males. They'll only do for certain women, under certain circumstances. As an example: a friend in the area is in bad shape, healthwise. I asked the guys who were all, ooohhh mistressssss let me serrrrve youuuuuu to meet me so we could trot on over to Ms B's. Heavens no!! They wanted to serve MEEEEEEE not my friend! Um. Okay. If you want to be my servant, your job is to OBEY me and please me. How better to show that than by helping my longtime friend, a woman who NEEDS HELP.

Charity is so unsexy.

(though Detroit is a cesspit... we do have a fine tradition of banding together to help those in need)

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(in reply to PeonForHer)

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