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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 6:38:34 AM

LillyBoPeep

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SuzeCheri

Because love is often blind. She got to know him and decided that she liked him more than she disliked his smoking.

exactly.
he was greater than the sum of his parts.

plus, he wanted help with quitting, and having a girl who got sick when he did it was good motivation. =p

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 7:15:34 AM

MissImmortalPain

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Kids(I don't mean having them I mean the bad thing), necro, and disrespect. Everything else that annoys me I can beat out of the other person.

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Post #: 42

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 8:29:43 AM

Hisprettybaby

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MissImmortalPain

Kids(I don't mean having them I mean the bad thing), necro, and disrespect. Everything else that annoys me I can beat out of the other person.

Oh yeah, I need to add necro to my deal breakers. That was SO much a deal breaker it didn't even cross my mind!

lol

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Post #: 43

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 8:41:43 AM

Kaliko

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hisprettybaby

Anyway, what are some of your deal-breakers?

Taking up two parking spaces with his car.
Being rude to servers.
Mouthing off to people in traffic.
Drug use.

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Post #: 44

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 8:42:44 AM

Hisprettybaby

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hisprettybaby

Anyway, what are some of your deal-breakers?

Taking up two parking spaces with his car.
Being rude to servers.
Mouthing off to people in traffic.
Drug use.

Yeah, they suck!

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Post #: 45

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 10:13:29 AM

ProlificNeeds

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In the realm of things you come across often... I'd say the biggest deal breaker is the unwillingness to compromise. If I accepted someone as they are, and then they went and made a change.. say, they suddenly started using drugs for whatever reason, I wouldn't toss them right off, I'd have to lay it out the terms of what it means in order to stay. IE, I don't mind if someone smokes a little whacky weed, provided it's never in my house, or present on his person when we're together.
Same with the cleanliness, I actually had a partner who started growing very slovenly. I told him point blank, 'clean up, keep clean, or I'm not touching you'. At the same time I was willing to help him with his laundry if he found it so onerous a task.

A lot of times people change because something has happened, if they've changed to adopted a bad habit or behavior, I at least try to find out why, and help them correct it if they want help correcting it. If they refuse to compromise, then there's no space to 'work together' any more and that's when it's time to part ways.

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Post #: 46

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 10:27:44 AM

Hisprettybaby

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ProlificNeeds
I at least try to find out why, and help them correct it if they want help correcting it. If they refuse to compromise, then there's no space to 'work together' any more and that's when it's time to part ways.

This too. ^^^^ That person I mentioned in my OP as being stinky, he wasn't at first and then, suddenly, he was always showing up stinky. I offered to help him & gave him detailed instructions on hygiene, but to no avail. So we "parted ways."

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Post #: 47

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 10:42:41 AM

littlewonder

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too many things to even begin to name all of them but just off the top of my head....completely different morals, values, ethics, religion, poor hygiene, dishonesty including lying by omission and cheating, someone who is not stable in their life, too young, too old, too overweight, too underweight, someone who is disrespectful, has a hot temper, poor attitudes....my list could go on and on and on

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Post #: 48

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 11:04:21 AM

GreedyTop

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someone who has chosen to milk, and play up, a disability to get gov't (and other) benefits.
someone who routinely steals seemingly minor stuff.. and brags about it.
someone that feels that domestic violence in ANY situation is ok (regardless of their alleged justification for it) i.e. "she had been drinking! I only did it to make her go to bed!!" or some such shit...

all serious deal breakers.

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 11:19:40 AM

LadyHibiscus

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It seems like the biggest one is DISHONESTY, since that's such an umbrella term, covering deceit and omission and thievery and criminal behavior.

Really, there are precious few differences between kink relationships and others, a fact that keeps getting repeated around here!

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Post #: 50

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 12:42:33 PM

searching4mysir

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By active addiction I mean an alcoholic/gambling addict who is not in recovery (for example).

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 12:48:12 PM

LadyHibiscus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir

By active addiction I mean an alcoholic/gambling addict who is not in recovery (for example).

Criminy, GAMBLING!! There's another one I'd forgotten! SO true.

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Post #: 52

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 1:42:43 PM

lobodomslavery

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my deal breakers are materialistic Women and Women who express their opinions in a haughty manner and get feline when you try to call them on issues
kevin

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 1:46:26 PM

Lockit

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Damn... I would hate.. simply hate being feline!

I would have to say... most of the above are deal breakers to me, but also someone that has serious mental health issues... someone that cannot hold a job or won't and those with children I have to take part in raising. So done with that!

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 2:01:00 PM

myotherself

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

my deal breakers are materialistic Women and Women who express their opinions in a haughty manner and get feline when you try to call them on issues
kevin

Feline???

Yup, definitely drugs.

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Post #: 55

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 2:07:45 PM

Tantriqu

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Echo lots of the above:
Lying and cheating, esp. infidelity
Passive-aggressive/making excuses
Negative/depressed/conspiracy theorist or just plain psycho
Being late/not living up to promises
Anyone who says he doesn't want any 'drama' will have a long history of being the drama llama himself.
Addict [although I *adore* oral pleasures from ex-smokers!]
Unemployed and not actively looking
Not well-read or not intellectually curious
Short fuse, including as above, rude to servers
Socially inept/poor communicator
Do-me subs who consider us a 'fetish delivery system'
Bi-/switches/tv's/diapers/extreme masochists
Bad smell!
Low libido or poor stamina; got to be at least my height, and fit enough [with superb breath-control ;-) ] for vigorous and rigorous frequent bendy s-e-x

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Post #: 56

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 2:13:21 PM

fragilepieces

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quote:

Anyway, what are some of your deal-breakers?

Showing a habit of being rude and disrespectful to me/others
Arrogance
taking D/s way too seriously

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Post #: 57

RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 2:19:45 PM

SoulAlloy

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Hmmm... My deal breakers:

- different life goals
- showing no interest or respect for my son, or his part in my life
- not regarding my own wellbeing as important (I apply this to myself with regard for my partner's wellbeing too)
- cheating with no remorse
- trolling

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 2:27:36 PM

CountDice

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Good afternoon,

I've been following this thread, off and on, all day, and it looks like a reasonably comprehensive list is being developed here.

Give this thread should a few more days, then maybe, someone could create a poll, listing the most commonly mentioned items, for voting. I believe the results could be quite informative to anyone who might be interested in seeing what "lines" should not be crossed.

In reference to Tantriqu's list: "Being late/not living up to promises" is an especially significant situation (and one I recently disassociated myself from). However, I disagree with the drama llama observation; not everyone who wants to avoid drama has a history of drama himself or herself. Some, having witnessed such, have decided they simply do not want to endure it.

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RE: Deal Breakers Anyone? - 9/30/2011 2:46:53 PM

Hisprettybaby

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~FR~
The list being compiled on this thread is really very interesting. It gives people a lot to think about excepting, of course, kevin's attempt to derail it and make it all about the big, bad women.

~Hisprettybaby~

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Post #: 60