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RE: Yet ANOTHER Pro Domme post - 10/15/2011 5:35:31 AM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline
LP you leave reason and logic outa this! We abandoned that back on page 1.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 321
RE: Yet ANOTHER Pro Domme post - 10/15/2011 5:42:26 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
Well, then we get back into who is really in charge if it's a paid service.  That takes us back to around page three or so.  I'm not sure if anybody want to do that. 


Indeed. And re that, you know that the police here like to refer to themselves as 'The Police Service'? And guess who pays their wages.

I'll have to try to remember that I'm his Dominant next time a copper arrests me. ;-)


quote:

There was a prior post that you made that was an interesting.  To paraphrase, you mentioned how a paid session would have to work for you because it wouldn't if you and she didn't feel a certain way about it.  I see that as the very same thing that the client wanted, just in a different way.  He didn't necessarily want to give power over during the sessions.

Here's the part that I find funny as heck about this whole thread.  Every time somebody comes across these boards and gets labeled as a 'do-me' bottom, the first thing they get told is to go to a pro because they only want their kink fulfilled.  That's exactly what the guy in the scenario presented did.  It just so happens that giving up control during play wasn't a part of his kink.  He just wanted to bottom for the sensations, rather than actually submit.

So, now that I've tied this back into the original post, I'll wait for somebody to come back and tell Me about how all of their clients, every single one that they've had over the years, were all truly submissive and not any of them just wanted to bottom like the guy in the OP.


I doubt anyone's going to come on and say that all her clients were truly submissive - but the opposite makes just as little sense. Even a guy who says 'Do me, do me, in exactly the way I want it and no other, Mistress!' is using the word 'Mistress' to imply some sort of dominance on her part, however thin. For her part . . . well, there's crap acting, and there's Marlon Brando method-acting, 'immersed in the part'.


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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 322
RE: Yet ANOTHER Pro Domme post - 10/15/2011 6:14:51 AM   
TheFireWithinMe


Posts: 1672
Joined: 10/3/2011
From: The Depths of Hell
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quote:

Here's the part that I find funny as heck about this whole thread.  Every time somebody comes across these boards and gets labeled as a 'do-me' bottom, the first thing they get told is to go to a pro because they only want their kink fulfilled.  That's exactly what the guy in the scenario presented did.  It just so happens that giving up control during play wasn't a part of his kink.  He just wanted to bottom for the sensations, rather than actually submit.


Bingfuckinggo! So I guess someone is going to come along and say but..but..but this is different but it really isn't. For the purposes of the exchange between them, as soon as money exchanges hands it becomes all about fulfilling the sub's fantasies. PERIOD.

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(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 323
RE: Yet ANOTHER Pro Domme post - 10/15/2011 7:56:50 AM   
BalltoySlave


Posts: 5
Joined: 4/8/2011
Status: offline
WOW! What a thread.

Couldn't finish all of it as I don't have the time, but there seems to be one perspective missing from all the posts I've read.

That of the customers'.

I've been with enough pro-doms and garden variety vanilla sex workers, so I'll give you all my opinion on the matter (short version).

Pro-dommes are sex workers plain and simple. I wouldn't call sex workers 'whores' as that word is used derogatorily and connotes something different than merely 'sex for money' ... regardless of what the dictionary says. Same like the word 'nigger' means something quite different than merely 'black person'. But, at the end of the day it is sex for money. It's prostitution honey!

Pro-dommes ... they're fetish delivery systems. They're there for me. YEAH!

If I'm paying I fully expect to get what I want ... and just as important, not receive what I clearly say does not interest me. She must be clean, well groomed, gracious, alert, sober, skilled and talented. In pre-session she should get her finger on the pulse of what makes me tick. Of course, as she cannot read my mind there always remains room for interpretation. So, in session we need to communicate, but that doesn't mean I'll jump up and cry out "CUT ... take it from the top ... TAKE 2 ... Roll 'em". To navigate the fantasy but yet keep the continuity and to help her maintain her role -- communication is subtle ... she needs to be able read cues.

I have a job too.  I also should be clean, well groomed, gracious, alert, and sober ... and communicate sufficiently with her before the session so she'll be informed as to how best to scratch the itch. I would hope she too enjoys our time together, but that's secondary. 

Generally, as for sex workers in my neck of the woods ... aside from the scammers and 'whores' ... they do have their ego on the line and do want to do a good job. 

Well, that's all folks. 

(in reply to Awareness)
Profile   Post #: 324
RE: Yet ANOTHER Pro Domme post - 10/15/2011 8:13:16 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

We're using dictionary definitions here.
Well since you want to use definitions, here's the Wiki definition:
quote:

Prostitution is the act or practice of providing sexual services to another person in return for payment.
They further define "sexual services" where they include the following telling phrase:
quote:

Sexual activity can be regarded as conventional or as alternative, involving, for example, fetishism and/or BDSM activities

The legal dictionary section of thefreedictionary.com defines it as
quote:

a person who receives payment for sexual intercourse or other sexual acts, generally as a regular occupation.

WordIQ.com defines it as
quote:

Prostitution is the sale of sexual services (typically manual stimulation, oral sex, sexual intercourse, or anal sex) for cash or other kind of return, generally indiscriminately with many persons.
Here the word "typically" clearly does not limit the "sexual services" to the acts listed.

Ninjawords.com defines it as
quote:

A person who performs sexual activity for payment.


About.com defines BDSM as
quote:

BDSM is a term most often used to describe a range of sexual behaviors, but it's also an approach to sex and sex play.
WordIQ defines BDSM as
quote:

BDSM is a term which describes a number of related patterns of human sexual behaviour.
Wiki has the following as its definition
quote:

BDSM is an erotic preference and a form of sexual expression involving the consensual use of restraint, intense sensory stimulation, and fantasy power role-play.


So depending on where you look, exchanging BDSM activities <which can be defined as a "sexual activity"> for cash is indeed prostitution.

Even if you decide to go with the very narrow definition of requiring some form of genital contact, the following definitions could be said to apply.
Definition #2 from Mirriam Webster?
quote:

2: a person (as a writer or painter) who deliberately debases his or her talents (as for money)
Or #3 from dictionary.com?
quote:

3. a person who willingly uses his or her talent or ability in a base and unworthy way, usually for money.


That's the problem with running to some dictionary or definition, there are many of them, and they all have slightly different nuances, one can't just cherry pick the one that fits your argument and claim some sort of authority for one's position.

Similarly, one can't just throw in a disparaging remark including the words "fuckity fuck fuck" and thereby dismiss Hanners' arguments, in fact, doing so is pretty much an admission that you really have nothing with which to counter what she has said.

And finally, yes, it really is that simple, you are complicating things overly. You are overlooking the obvious, that you have specific expectations in mind that you would require a professional top to meet. In your case it is that she manage to give you the impression that she is a) in control, and b) enjoying herself, and c) doing it for her pleasure, not yours. This is your shopping list, in essence it's really no different than the typical Do-Me's shopping list.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 325
RE: Yet ANOTHER Pro Domme post - 10/15/2011 9:08:31 AM   
Arienos


Posts: 161
Joined: 10/5/2011
Status: offline
quote:

You might never have encountered it, but there are guys who have certain preferences but let you run with the rest, you can call it topping or domming, your choice, it's still not laying back and getting fucked, of course there is a difference between purely private play and being paid for your expertise,


What of, whores and professionals, prostitutes and female dominants? Professional is immediately withdrawn from the argument as no governing form or body accredits clearly defined acts conditions conducts or behaviors causal of ejaculation and/or mental emotional climax, it’s simply a crude and highly transparent attempt to sanitize the word whore.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 326
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