RE: A Dom who feels guilty about being one?

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RE: A Dom who feels guilty about being one? - 11/27/2011 12:45:26 PM

sheisreeds

Posts: 578
Joined: 7/8/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

quote:

sheisReeds
I've got a switch in my head I can flip and not be impacted.

Hey, I gotta the psycho switch too. I flick it, and just get all sorts of cold. Once I'm in that zone, I can do just about anything to anyone and not feel to much impact.
It's kinda scary, actually, especially when I was young and all sorts of violent cuz I didn't know how to deal with shit.

At times I was a ghost haunting my life. Other times I was an effervescent psycho. I miss that girl sometimes, she was all sorts of crazy fun.

Give and take with equal levels of impunity causing equal levels of harm.

And this, rounding back to the original topic, is exactly why insecure doms are not safer.

_____________________________

~ s.

Oh my darling, give me reason
give me something to believe in

You need a spankin' baby!

(in reply to Kana)

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RE: A Dom who feels guilty about being one? - 11/27/2011 12:56:55 PM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline

Reeds I can relate to what you said about realizing that your ideas about life annd yourself were wrong. I think that's kinda where I am now. I had a relationship where all these "scary" parts of me suddenly became "okay," the that went away very suddenly and I shut off. Butnow, being involved in something that doesnnt quite take me "there" has given me a clear idea of where "there" really is, and in a lot of ways it bothers me.
When I was young, I was this alarmingly violentlittle person, but no one would really guess it because I was a small, cute girl. There was just a lot of very dark stuff floating around in my noggin, and I'm having to accept that maybe it's still there, I've jjust learnned to channel it in different ways. I'm an s-person, but we aren't blanks whoare merely acted on - we have things upstairs, too.
But some of it bothers me because I feel like it's incongrous with the "me" I've tried to cultivate.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica

(in reply to sheisreeds)

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Post #: 62

RE: A Dom who feels guilty about being one? - 12/25/2011 6:33:58 PM

BEMYBICH7287

Posts: 6
Joined: 12/19/2011
Status: offline

I Sort of understand. I have had my financial slave for some years now. And i wasnt even looking for that type of arrangement. At first I just enjoyed the lifestyle. I was always very strong demanding but independent. Anything that is not deemed "normal" by society will cause some sort of conviction inside conflict, especially if you are new to the lifestyle or have just not been honest with yourself on whether you are truly a dominant or a submissive. Some people are so afraid of the bullshit that they are afraid to admit that they are worthless subs and that ofcourse would also cause them to feel guilty about the acts performed by their sub.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

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Post #: 63