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RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:07:17 AM

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This doesn't seem like such a difficult question to Me. You folks are a married couple, right? Well, what do you do when one of you gets sick? Are you going to tell Me that there aren't any times when one of you does something that kind of annoys the other or that neither of you has some little thing that can get on the nerves of the other in certain situations?

Hey, if that's the case, good on you! I can't say it works the same around here. We do have little idiosyncrasies that get a little irritation going at times. Frankly, I'm kind of a pain in the ass when I'm sick and if I'm not feeling well, My husband takes care of Me. The same thing works in reverse. Get two D-types in the same household when one is not feeling up to par and the other is overseeing their medical needs and there are some interesting conversations.

The point is, when you care about somebody, the person comes first. Not the role and not the title. It doesn't matter if it's your spouse or your sub. You make allowances when somebody isn't a hundred percent.

If that thought didn't come to you during that fourteen day stretch, I really don't know what to tell you.

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RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:07:31 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

I'm not sure.

She yelled so loud, she gave me a migraine!

ROTFLMAO

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RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:19:53 AM

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For your information narcissism is: erotic gratification derived from admiration of one's own physical or mental attributes. Your usage is incorrect. If you are going to use a word at least get it right.

(in reply to KatherineJ)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:27:21 AM

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quote:

For your information narcissism is: erotic gratification derived from admiration of one's own physical or mental attributes. Your usage is incorrect. If you are going to use a word at least get it right.

Up to this point your deportment has demonstrated control and openness to constructive criticism. Do not allow a wild screaming for attention to alter your course of conduct.

(in reply to oddlots347)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:30:58 AM

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You are correct.

(in reply to Arienos)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:33:28 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Using fast reply b/c I just have to stick my toe in the water here.

I have had the misfortune to suffer from a horrendous migraine on more than one occasion. This type of debilitating migraine renders you incapable of doing anything other than moan, suffer, and throw up. This is not the type of pain you "work through" by any means, b/c it's not *just* pain, the sufferer is often extremely sensitive to light, to smells, to sound, etc.

Actually, not true. When I get what I call my level 1 and 2 migraines, I go to work and deal with it. I'm not happy or comfortable...but I can still function and do my work. It's not until I get to my level 3 and 4 migraines that I'm incapable of working through it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB

First the stones were thrown and then a few people picked up rocks. Is there an eventual point to any of this?

People sometimes make mistakes for their own selfish reasons. In this case I suspect they talked about it together and built it up to be something that pissed them both off. They also spoke to another on scene person and from the sound of it that on scene person gave them some negative feedback. From later posts that they have written, I suspect they realize this and want to put things right.
Why don't we just let them do that. At the end of the day she stayed for the 14 days and wants to get back together with them, so they must of been doing something right.

Because it's repeated behavior. If you look at some of their other posts, you'll see the same pattern.

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(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:48:31 AM

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From: Moosecrotch, Va
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quote:

ORIGINAL: oddlots347

For your information narcissism is: erotic gratification derived from admiration of one's own physical or mental attributes. Your usage is incorrect. If you are going to use a word at least get it right.

Says the folks who confused there and their...

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(in reply to oddlots347)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:51:58 AM

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It's really not what people think of when we say one is a narcissist, though is it?

According to web md narcissists have these traits:

Belief that he or she is "special" and unique, and can only be understood by other special people

Expectation that others will automatically go along with what he or she wants

Inability to recognize or identify with the feelings, needs, and viewpoints of others

Envy of others or a belief that others are envious of him or her

Hypersensitivity to insults (real or imagined), criticism, or defeat, possibly reacting with rage, shame, and humiliation

Arrogant behavior and/or attitude

Are self-centered and boastful

Seek constant attention and admiration

Consider themselves better than others

Exaggerate their talents and achievements

Believe that they are entitled to special treatment

Are easily hurt but may not show it

Set unrealistic goals

May take advantage of others to achieve their goals

_____________________________

~Christina

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(in reply to oddlots347)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:52:44 AM

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Until you know where the op's came from in the first place... swinger that wanted to try bdsm and in a hurry, seeking wildly on the forums to find such slave within I believe it was weeks of their arrival, etc. you may think this is just message board drama. They were advised and some of us weren't easy on them because of things they said, yes, but they continue to show a lack of understanding many things and how it is best to proceed in a situation, in my opinion, which can mean something or not.

Migraines can have many causes. Just because someone is used to them doesn't mean that they are just migraines, whatever level or degree of effect they have on a person. I was considered to just have migraines until we later found great medical practitioners that knew what they were doing. Then we found what they thought a rare genetic disease, which is still considered that simply because it isn't even taught in the USA and is so little known in the medical profession. With my experience, I could ask many questions that would come close to proving the seriousness or possibility of having this illness that isn't as rare as once thought. Others wouldn't know about it. However, without discussing this further with the submissive or going a medical route in understanding... they come here to know what to do with an irritating slave.

Some migraines can do brain damage. I live this... One type of headache can evolve into another type of headache if not treated or if you aren't real damn lucky. A sinus headache can turn into a migraine. A stress headache can turn into a migraine.

A little sigh or sound of pain, a gasp, etc. can be a sign of a drama queen or someone seriously not being treated appropriately that needs attention. I dare say that in a few months that is possible for the op's to know this submissive... they may not really have much clue about her medical situation or what they are doing with their new slave, add a medical condition... and this quickly upset because she made sounds they didn't like hearing... oh well.... it more looks like ignorance and a lack in many things than it does a simple error. Again, in my opinion.

You rush into some things in life and you can make a mistake. Coming in new to something and acting as if you know what you are doing isn't proof of anything but you don't know what you're doing. You won't hear me talking about certain kinks because I have no real clue other than reading about some of them. That is where common sense comes in and I don't think that the op's are well endowed with it.

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RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:54:17 AM

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Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder [1] in which the individual is described as being excessively preoccupied with issues of personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity.[2] Narcissistic personality disorder is closely linked to self-centeredness.

I calls them how I sees them. That you keep backtracking all over the place trying to pretend your previous annoyance has miraculously turned into care and concern is not something I'm buying.

And yes, I am basing that opinion on not just this thread but all the others you have started that make it abundantly clear you two wouldn't have a clue if I gave you one for free. But, you know, carry on.

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(in reply to oddlots347)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 10:59:42 AM

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ODDLOTS:

YOU NEED TO GET IT RIGHT, YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT!!!:

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder[1] in which the individual is described as being excessively preoccupied with issues of personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity.[2] Narcissistic personality disorder is closely linked to self-centeredness.

Symptoms

Symptoms of this disorder includes, but are not limited to:

Reacts to criticism with anger, shame, or humiliation
May take advantage of others to reach their own goal
Tend to exaggerate their own importance, achievements, and talents
Imagines unrealistic fantasies of success, beauty, power, intelligence, or romance
Requires constant attention and positive reinforcement from others
Easily becomes jealous
Lacks empathy and disregards the feelings of others
Obsessed with oneself
Mainly pursues selfish goals

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy.

(in reply to KyttynTheMynx)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 11:03:17 AM

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Look up Katherine, I already posted that. (with a citation, btw...)

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(in reply to KatherineJ)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 11:08:16 AM

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Joined: 11/27/2011
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YEs XXBlushes, you and I were typing at the same time, you just bet me to the send button. LOL

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 11:08:20 AM

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Joined: 11/28/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: oddlots347

I also suffer from migraines and people handle them differently and how intense they are differs also. She is coming back again this weekend. We will discuss this issue in more detail and come to an understanding. A sadist friend of ours views this totally differently. Thanks for the responses that actually addressed my question. The others I find quite humorous, thanks for the laugh.

How sad you use a sadist view instead of a medical doctor !

(in reply to oddlots347)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 11:12:18 AM

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Thank you mysouldesire! I completely agree. This is a MEDICAL ISSUE, which I pointed out in a COUPLE of my posts.

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RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 11:20:05 AM

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Is there a point behind the huge fonts and the caps?

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RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 12:03:41 PM

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From: Northern New Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: oddlots347

For your information narcissism is: erotic gratification derived from admiration of one's own physical or mental attributes. Your usage is incorrect. If you are going to use a word at least get it right.

I suggest before you correct someone, you check out your sources. Narcissism is a psychological disorder.

Narcissims/Psychology Today

quote:

Narcissists cut a wide, swashbuckling figure through the world. At one end of the self-loving spectrum is the charismatic leader with an excess of charm, whose only vice may be his or her inflated amour-propre. At the far end of the spectrum reside individuals with narcissistic personality disorder, whose grandiosity soars to such heights that they are manipulative and easily angered, especially when they don't receive the attention they consider their birthright. Here's how to figure out whether the big talker in your office really believes his own hype.

Narcissist tend to never take responsibility for their own mistakes, rather choose to blame outside sources.

Please, you have already shown YOUR true colors, you lack of communication skills and your lack of compassion for others.

Is there really a need for you to dig yourself a deeper whole by showing you aren't the sharpest tool in the shed?

ETA:

Obviously, many of the bright minds here think alike (lol). I hadn't even read the rest when I posted, hence the repeat.

Then again, maybe if they see it enough times, it might sink in?

Nah!

< Message edited by LafayetteLady -- 11/29/2011 12:09:27 PM >

(in reply to oddlots347)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 12:14:33 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

Then again, maybe if they see it enough times, it might sink in?

Nah, they'll just make themselves feel better by saying we're a bunch of meanies that don't understand them.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to LafayetteLady)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 12:24:31 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

Then again, maybe if they see it enough times, it might sink in?

Nah, they'll just make themselves feel better by saying we're a bunch of meanies that don't understand them.

You're right. I don't know about you, but I have always had trouble understanding inexcusable ignorance.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

RE: Slave under consideration - 11/29/2011 12:46:37 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: oddlots347

For those who addressed the original question and tried to give incite into what steps to take to help this situation...thank you. For the judgmental ones who can go around and say things you have said about someone you do not even know...that says a lot about you. I would never verbally attack anyone that I did not personally know and to me the people that do that. Really show there true colors.

You're very welcome. I tried very hard to give incite.

January

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(in reply to oddlots347)

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