Christmas gifts (Full Version)

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Iamsemisweet -> Christmas gifts (12/4/2011 7:25:33 PM)

I need to buy my love a Christmas present, and I am a little confused.  I was going to get him some work out sessions with my personal trainer, because I think he needs to exercise more and my trainer is pretty fun.   Some of my friends think that is not a good idea, though, and could be misconstrued as criticism.  I just think he would like it, and it would be good for him.  So, what do you think?



barelynangel -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/4/2011 7:32:00 PM)


What you may want to do is give him a certificate to choose his own trainer because if he doesn't like yours -- that could put him off working out even more.

your trainer -- if he isn't just out for more money -- may be able to discuss this with you as they deal with this stuff every day and could explain to you the possible risks and benefits.

You could also do a split training sessions with you -- i.e., you both work out at the same time with the Trainer. But don't do this as a Christmas Present then do it as something you both do as a couple.

All in all, to me, this has to be something he wants to do not something you think he should do. It could backfire on you so you don't want this to be the christmas gift from hell in the years to come lol.

angel



Termyn8or -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/4/2011 8:02:24 PM)

YOU ARE SEXIST ! ! ! ! ! ! !! ! !! ! ! ! ! !

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/2077360/beware_of_the_doghouse_hilarious/

T^T



Anaxagoras -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/4/2011 8:36:40 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet
I need to buy my love a Christmas present, and I am a little confused.  I was going to get him some work out sessions with my personal trainer, because I think he needs to exercise more and my trainer is pretty fun.   Some of my friends think that is not a good idea, though, and could be misconstrued as criticism.  I just think he would like it, and it would be good for him.  So, what do you think?

I think you should discreetly sound him out on the topic. See if he expresses some concern about his shape, vague interest in getting fit, eating healthier, joining a gym etc., which would allow you to justify the gift and thereby side-step a bullet if he does misconstrue it. [;)]



littlewonder -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/4/2011 8:51:59 PM)

I personally would find it insulting for my love to give me a gym session. As your friends said, I would take it as a criticism. It's like buying a woman a washer or dryer as a gift.

How about a gift certificate to a spa or a weekend fun session of some type for the two of you together to make it special and romantic?





Kirata -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 1:06:41 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

I was going to get him some work out sessions with my personal trainer, because I think he needs to exercise more...

It's been a long time, but as best I recall Santa never asked me what I "needed" for Christmas, and certainly not what other people thought I needed. He asked me what I wanted for Christmas.

Given his long experience with this sort of thing, I think you should follow his example.

K.



LizDeluxe -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 4:28:35 AM)

The upside is that you won't have to worry about him re-gifting it.



risktaker9 -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 4:32:37 AM)

I don't think I'd go there. If someone gave it to me I'd be weirded out by it. You said you think he needs it in your OP, you don't think that fact will be perfectly obvious to him when he gets it?



xxblushesxx -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 5:13:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirata


quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

I was going to get him some work out sessions with my personal trainer, because I think he needs to exercise more...

It's been a long time, but as best I recall Santa never asked me what I "needed" for Christmas, and certainly not what other people thought I needed. He asked me what I wanted for Christmas.

Given his long experience with this sort of thing, I think you should follow his example.

K.


Kirata's right. (again!!!)



windchymes -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 7:35:22 AM)

I would say that if he WANTS a personal trainer and has been chomping at the bit to exercise, then it's a great idea. But if the subject of his "needing" exercise hasn't really been an enjoyable topic of conversation between the two of you, then I kinda frown on the idea.

Once I bought ballet lessons for a guy I was involved with. I know most of you would cringe, but he had told me that dancing ballet was a secret fantasy of his, and he had taken me to see The Nutcracker in Cleveland that year, so I did it, and he was thrilled.



LaTigresse -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 7:46:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I personally would find it insulting for my love to give me a gym session. As your friends said, I would take it as a criticism. It's like buying a woman a washer or dryer as a gift.

How about a gift certificate to a spa or a weekend fun session of some type for the two of you together to make it special and romantic?



And I would LOVE it! Last year, along with my television, I got a full year's health club membership. It is been one of the, if not thee, most appreciated gifts I've ever gotten.



LillyBoPeep -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 7:51:21 AM)

Has he ever mentioned wanting something like this?
You're kinda playing in a minefield... For some, it would be appreciated, even if they haven't expressly stated that they're interested, they see the gift as motivation to do something they've wanted to do anyway.
But other people would take that as you saying "you're fat, get off your ass and work out!"
No matter how well-meaning you are, it's still a minefield.

If he hasn't ever haphazardly stated wanting to work out, and if he's not the type to respond to outside motivation, I'd say "bad idea."

And honestly, even if they say "oh I've always wanted to do that," you still might be wasting money. I bought belly dance lessons for two friends who were constantly jabbering me about how much they wanted to do it. They live far away so I couldn't teach them myself. I researched troupes in their areas to find ones I thought had great technique and who would teach them well.
For all the "omgz that looks so fun!" stuff I was hearing, I figured they'd be well-received. I later learned from the instructors -- around the 1-year-expiry-date, that neither had ever been used. :p




Iamsemisweet -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 9:34:49 AM)

The problem is he is the kind of person who buys what he wants himself. I bought personal training sessions for my ex husband, and he often told me it was the best gift anyone had ever given him. I was hoping to work the same magic here, but it is starting to sound like a bad idea. I had considered giving him a gift certificate for a local resort, but we both have animals, so it isn't that easy to get away. So, a bottle of tequila it is.



angelikaJ -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 9:59:53 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

The problem is he is the kind of person who buys what he wants himself. I bought personal training sessions for my ex husband, and he often told me it was the best gift anyone had ever given him. I was hoping to work the same magic here, but it is starting to sound like a bad idea. I had considered giving him a gift certificate for a local resort, but we both have animals, so it isn't that easy to get away. So, a bottle of tequila it is.


I am a bit surprised by this as being your final answer.
This is going to sound more critical than I am intending.

Your ex-husband liked the gift and because he did you were hoping this might be a good idea for this guy but since it might not be then you are going to buy him a bottle of tequila?

If I might make a suggestion couldn't you make him something or find some sort of gift that is a bit more personal, even if you have to ask him for his Christmas list?

How well do you know him?


This will be my Master and I's 3rd Christmas together.
3 Christmases and 3 years of Birthdays and he might not love every gift I have given Him in terms of the present itself, but He has always appreciated that I gave careful thought to selecting them and they came from my heart.



Lucylastic -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 10:05:23 AM)

Yeah Im afraid I would find it insulting, but then he knows me well enough only to give me that as a pressie if he wanted a divorce.
but then, my eldest son and my daughter would be over the moon with such a gift:)
I would definitely sound him out more before you make the decision:)
good luck!



needlesandpins -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 11:06:04 AM)

i'd be deeply insulted by something like that.

to me it sounds like you are copping out, either something you and your ex like or a bottle of spirits that takes no thought.

even if he buys the things he likes for himself there should have been something he has mentioned over time that you could think of. my ex always asked me what i wanted, even once in a supermarket the night before mother's day 'er, what do you want?' needless to say my answer was 'nothing' and i walked out of the shop. i'd rather someone give me something personal to me that cost nothing but thought, than something that cost alot but held no thought.

i will always say that i want nothing if asked, but really i have probably mentioned loads of stuff at some point or another, if people have ever listened they'd know what to get me.

needles



windchymes -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 11:14:02 AM)

This thread brings back a memory.....ex-husband, young marrieds, baby, another baby on the way, his job required him to wear a shirt and tie every day, I stayed at home, washed and ironed his shirts.

He bought me a new iron for Christmas.

See, guy thinking: Wonderful gift, I'm making her life easier.

Girl thinking: You bought me a fucking iron??? for Christmas?????

[:D]



needlesandpins -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 11:40:04 AM)

yep, been there WindChymes, with oven gloves. wellies that are an everyday thing for me with dogs and horses so not something i'd want for christmas. give him his due, he did wrap them individually to make them extra special. slipper, even though i never wear them. in fact, in sixteen years the only things i remember that i remotely thought were thought about were two second hand paperback books and a fleece jumper. i don't actually think i got anything at all the rest of them.

oh well

needles



LaTigresse -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 11:48:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

This thread brings back a memory.....ex-husband, young marrieds, baby, another baby on the way, his job required him to wear a shirt and tie every day, I stayed at home, washed and ironed his shirts.

He bought me a new iron for Christmas.

See, guy thinking: Wonderful gift, I'm making her life easier.

Girl thinking: You bought me a fucking iron??? for Christmas?????

[:D]


Ohhhhhhhh memories!!! The first Christmas Generic Dude and I spent together he got me a crock pot and a vacuum cleaner. I could have KILLED HIM. With 20 years of training he has vastly improved.

Although this year, with money being so tight, I told him to not get me anything. If anything, a new rechargeable spotlight flashlight. My old ones will not charge anymore.



VirginPotty -> RE: Christmas gifts (12/5/2011 12:11:21 PM)

quote:

 because I think he needs to exercise more and my trainer is pretty fun.
 
Ordinarily I'd say that would be a wonderful gift but reading the above in the OP I'd have to go w/the nay sayers w/o actually knowing your "love".  Only you know for sure, Iamsemisweet.

I think women would be insulted by that gift, men not so much it's the fact that you said that YOU thought he needed more exercise.



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