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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/7/2011 7:29:19 PM   
LillyBoPeep


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No it's not difficult to perceive that that could happen. Relationships go down in flames all the time. And in a situation where one person has nothiing, it's really a good idea to have SOME idea for the future, in the event of death or break up.
It's not necessarily about the M possibly being bad, but that life takes twists annd turns when you never planned on it. So I can understand what you're saying. But I think people can still be optimistic about it, and give it their best shot.

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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/7/2011 7:31:42 PM   
FrostedFlake


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I just skimmed the thread. What everyone says is not going to affect what I am going to say.

My opinion about 'things' is moot. It's just 'stuff'. Every situation is different. But pets are not things. Pets are beings. And are not party to the relationship. Your cat is your cat. Your dog is your dog. Regardless of who your 'Good Friend' is, was, or might be.

Giving an animal away is an abusive act. If you cannot avoid it, then that is so. But just because a relationship sours? No.


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Frosted Flake
simul justus et peccator
Einen Liebhaber, und halten Sie die Schraube

"... evil (and hilarious) !!" Hlen5

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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/7/2011 8:16:09 PM   
sexyred1


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My stuff is always my stuff, no matter who I am with, and his is always his stuff.

When I was married, we bought stuff together and when we got divorced, we divvied up by who really wanted something bad enough; very civilized. I think when people end up hating each other, that is when fighting over stuff comes in.

I firmly believe all adults should have a joint household account and then separate accounts when it comes to money.

(in reply to FrostedFlake)
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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 12:49:28 AM   
Awareness


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Most M/s people are role-playing.

If you're in an M/s dynamic and you're the slave, you have no rights, no property, no nothing, except what our society insists you have.

If this is not acceptable to any slave, then this is a tacit admission she's playing a part, not living a lifestyle.

Questions like this are dead-easy to answer, if you're prepared to cut away the bullshit.  Slaves will answer that everything belongs to their master.  Role-players will come up with some other bullshit and try to rationalise it.

If you're a sub, then this question is not about you, so why the fuck are you putting your two cents in?  The inability of some subs to pay attention is a huge red flag which makes them manifestly unsuitable for a decent Dom.


< Message edited by Awareness -- 12/8/2011 12:50:35 AM >


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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 1:12:52 AM   
FrostedFlake


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quote:

Awareness
If you're a sub, then this question is not about you, so why the fuck are you putting your two cents in?


Because I give a shit.


(in reply to Awareness)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 3:41:59 AM   
LillyBoPeep


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Well, you have rights/stuff/etc if your M decides you should have them, or doesn't really care to take them away.

And FF, I agree that pets are beings, not things, but I never said anything about giving my pet away. I said I was okay with him giving me new rules for the dog to change bad habits.
Basically, like Kana said earlier, the authority to "do something" with the s-person's stuff may exist, but is controlled by the M's sense of morals and right and wrong.

The Dude was not at all interested in harming the dog; that would've conflicted with his feelings about animals. Separating an old dog from the person who had taken care of him his entire life would not have been good for him.

And the thing with consensual M/s relationships is, well we hitch our wagons to trains going places we agree to go. :p you can attach yourself to someone with ideals you respect, because being unable to respect that person, for many of us, makes them unsuitable, right? You enter into it after careful consideration of the terms. You don't just signn up with anny Tom, Dick, or Harry.

And one guy/chick/whoever gender-neutral might think of owning the person+stuff, and another might think of owning the person and controlling the use of stuff. There's no accredited university that defines all of this for us, and even historically, slaves existed in a myriad of ways.

One way I do think of it, though, is that the M is like a particular particle in a set of similar particles but with a particular charge, out in space. Whatever the particle's charge is, it'll attract or seek out another particle that fits.
Example, my previous M wanted to have a ton of kids, so he wanted a girl who'd be interested in them, and thus a better mom. A girl who hated them would've been a bad fit.
Meanwhile, some people prefer keeping emotional distance between themselves and people they own - all the "does love weaken Mastery" threads, with people on either slashie side agreeing and disagreeing - lots of different ways it can be done.

So... while there are some differences between people who want ownership relationships and people who don't, I'm not so rigidly attached to what those relationships have to look like. Other people don't have to qualify their relationship to me. I don't automatically assume someone's roleplaying just because I don't agree with a facet of their consensual relationship. If one M defines it differently than another, whose right is it to say "nah you're a roleplayer because you don't do it the way I do?"

I'm kinda glad that the first time around, I was kind of just feeling around in the dark with someone I trusted to lead me. Sometimes it seems like definitions and verbage and "blah blah blah" matter more thann just making it work, whatever "it" is. Sure, there are some things that just don't look like M/s to me, and when you try to talk to people with a wildly different perspective, no matter the title, it's usually pretty clear. But I dunno that it's my business or my job to care what someone else calls their relationship.

< Message edited by LillyBoPeep -- 12/8/2011 3:42:41 AM >


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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 6:46:31 PM   
AneNoz


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A slave owns nothing.

Be at peace
Aneka

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 6:50:33 PM   
AneNoz


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quote:

If you're a sub, then this question is not about you, so why the fuck are you putting your two cents in?
By what right then, is it that you, who has shown yourself a most abject slave, make your contribution?

Be at peace
Aneka

(in reply to Awareness)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 8:05:12 PM   
Missokyst


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AneNoz
is it that you, who has shown yourself a most abject slave, make your contribution?





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pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to AneNoz)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 8:56:43 PM   
FrostedFlake


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From: Centralia, Washington
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quote:

Original post:
One poster there mentioned a pet with specialized needs that the M was unfamiliar with -- she asked to remain in full control over that animal. So what about pets?


I'm sorry if I misunderstood you, Lily. Or went further than you intended. I just followed my heart.


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Frosted Flake
simul justus et peccator
Einen Liebhaber, und halten Sie die Schraube

"... evil (and hilarious) !!" Hlen5

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Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 10:13:21 PM   
Awareness


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  By attempting to bait me, you demean yourself.  Think upon that.

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RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 10:37:39 PM   
tazzygirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AneNoz

A slave owns nothing.

Be at peace
Aneka



And the moment I decide to walk out the door and take my stuff with me, I am no longer his slave, which entitles me to take all I brought with me.

Amazing how that works.

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Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to AneNoz)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 10:42:05 PM   
AneNoz


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I have done so, and you are correct. I have allowed my anger and disappointment to control me, and for that I must accept responsibility. This remark I withdraw, this was not called for here. I offer my apology.

It was with anger I was speaking. Ever is this an error, for anger fills one's heart with falsehood and blinds one's reason. I pray you think on that.

Be at peace
Aneka

< Message edited by AneNoz -- 12/8/2011 10:47:41 PM >

(in reply to Awareness)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 10:46:10 PM   
AneNoz


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To my mind you are not a slave, you are but a submissive who is but playing at slavery. You may name yourself slave, but the name of a thing does not make the thing. Nor does the taking of the name require another to so acknowledge you.

Be at peace
Aneka

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 10:50:06 PM   
tazzygirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AneNoz

To my mind you are not a slave, you are but a submissive who is but playing at slavery. You may name yourself slave, but the name of a thing does not make the thing. Nor does the taking of the name require another to so acknowledge you.

Be at peace
Aneka



The same can be said of a dominant who believes they are the uber dominant and wiser than any other dominant.

Your opinion of me doesnt matter. You can call me slime if you so desire. What has that accomplished? You have already made your feelings known on another thread how you feel about slaves.

And, frankly, running from that discussion is not the signs of a dominant either.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to AneNoz)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 10:55:39 PM   
LillyBoPeep


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aneka, since you think it best to take issues with slaves to their owners, why not ask tazzy's owner what he thinks. I have a feeling he disagrees with you. Whose opinion do you think should matter more to tazzy?

Your mind is not the only one on the planet, your opinion is not the only valid opinion.


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Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 11:05:15 PM   
tazzygirl


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She is certainly more than welcome to send him a message.

Dinnardin

He isnt hard to find.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 11:23:45 PM   
AneNoz


Posts: 263
Joined: 4/26/2011
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quote:


Your opinion of me doesnt matter.
This is so, why do you feel this is worthy of mention. You are not my slave, my opinion of you is of no consequence. In equal measure your opinion of me is of no consequence.

I have run from no discussion. It was a matter for Awareness and I. It has been concluded.

Be at peace
Aneka


< Message edited by AneNoz -- 12/8/2011 11:24:16 PM >

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 11:26:06 PM   
Lockit


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AneNoz

I have done so, and you are correct. I have allowed my anger and disappointment to control me, and for that I must accept responsibility. This remark I withdraw, this was not called for here. I offer my apology.

It was with anger I was speaking. Ever is this an error, for anger fills one's heart with falsehood and blinds one's reason. I pray you think on that.

Be at peace
Aneka


LOL... you were speaking in anger and felt the need to apologize and yet you want him to think on the fact that anger fills the heart with falsehood? What kind of passive aggressive finger pointing during an admitting of fault and an apology... is that?

I pray you think about that.


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(in reply to AneNoz)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Stuff about stuff - 12/8/2011 11:30:38 PM   
AneNoz


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I will not ask him as his thinking on this or any other thing is of no consequence to my life or myself. The only opinion of weight for tazzygirl should be his, to allow my views to alter her life against his wishes would be a grave error.

She names herself a slave, I do not recognize her as such. He names her a slave, I do not recognize her as such. Their naming is of no consequence to my view. My view is of no consequence to their naming. I have failed to discern what is the issue of contention.

Be at peace
Aneka.

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 60
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