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Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:06:10 PM   
submaleinuk


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/12/2011
Status: offline 		I know I do quite a lot, in real life I would say something but when I try bdsm I don't, if I did say how I feel I think the mistress would get a shock, I doubt they'd like it really, is this common or just me?
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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:09:31 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		No I don't.

The only time I can think of when I'm angry with him is when I'm bound and he's just wailing on me with a cane or something and I just want him to stop but it's not really anger....it's more frustration because it just fucking hurts and I want it to stop but yet I don't want to disappoint him.



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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:16:55 PM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		submaleinuk - over the course of several threads, you've expressed this idea that being dominated is upsetting/disturbing to anyone who experiences it, and you believe this because that's your experience. I guess I don't understand your motive? You've mentioned being in therapy to deal with it - are you trying to learn more or just hoping to keep after this "BDSM is bad for you" line you're on?

I feel a huge range of emotions during SM play, and sometimes I get frustrated if the will of the person in charge means I cann't do/have/buy/eat something I really want, but the overall experience is fulfilling for me and I don't believe it's unhealthy.

< Message edited by LillyBoPeep -- 12/8/2011 9:18:03 PM >

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:17:07 PM   
JanahX


Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline 		hell no. It turns me the fuck ON!

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:21:23 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		why do you do it if you think it's wrong and it angers you????



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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:23:15 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleinuk

I know I do quite a lot, in real life I would say something but when I try bdsm I don't, if I did say how I feel I think the mistress would get a shock, I doubt they'd like it really, is this common or just me?



It's just you

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:27:16 PM   
RaspberryLemon


Posts: 422
Joined: 7/18/2011
Status: offline 		I get uppity and frustrated when I'm being "dominated" by anyone but my Master. I bite back. I'm very stubborn. There is only one person who gets to order me around like that.

With my Master I love it. I absolutely love being dominated by him. I absolutely love him being in charge. If I didn't, I wouldn't be in this relationship with this dynamic. It doesn't make me angry, it makes me feel content, in my place, and exhilarated.

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:29:57 PM   
submaleinuk


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/12/2011
Status: offline 		Just trying to learn more.

For example if its common that people get angry then I could go along with it, but if it's not then prob I'm not submissive and should express my anger if tha makes sense, for example if a mistress told me to do something I would feel angry then think why don't you do it yourself, hope that makes sense
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

submaleinuk - over the course of several threads, you've expressed this idea that being dominated is upsetting/disturbing to anyone who experiences it, and you believe this because that's your experience. I guess I don't understand your motive? You've mentioned being in therapy to deal with it - are you trying to learn more or just hoping to keep after this "BDSM is bad for you" line you're on?

I feel a huge range of emotions during SM play, and sometimes I get frustrated if the will of the person in charge means I cann't do/have/buy/eat something I really want, but the overall experience is fulfilling for me and I don't believe it's unhealthy.

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:32:09 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleinuk

Just trying to learn more.

For example if its common that people get angry then I could go along with it, but if it's not then prob I'm not submissive and should express my anger if tha makes sense, for example if a mistress told me to do something I would feel angry then think why don't you do it yourself, hope that makes sense
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

submaleinuk - over the course of several threads, you've expressed this idea that being dominated is upsetting/disturbing to anyone who experiences it, and you believe this because that's your experience. I guess I don't understand your motive? You've mentioned being in therapy to deal with it - are you trying to learn more or just hoping to keep after this "BDSM is bad for you" line you're on?

I feel a huge range of emotions during SM play, and sometimes I get frustrated if the will of the person in charge means I cann't do/have/buy/eat something I really want, but the overall experience is fulfilling for me and I don't believe it's unhealthy.



I'm really scratching my head and wondering why you're doing this at all. I mean....are you wanting to just punish yourself or something? I'm really not getting it.



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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:35:18 PM   
submaleinuk


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/12/2011
Status: offline 		Not sure what u mean..

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:35:39 PM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		Maybe you aren't submissive. Not everyone really wants a power exchannge dynamic annd there really is nothing wrong with saying you're a bottom or a masochist but prefer more egalitarian relationships.

But yeah, even s-types have bad days, and sometimes "don't feel like it," but they talk to their partners and suck it up because the relationship is valuable to them.
If it does start to lose power over time, agai, it's something you work out with your partner.

But again - nothing wrong with not beinng submissive. Maybe you need to spend time with yourself and figure it out, rather than try to annalyze other people to determine your own motivations.
Try journaling, try thinking about what YOU want from a relationship.

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:36:57 PM   
anniezz338


Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline 		Depends on the who. i feel like traffic dominates me. But i'm friendly about it...i smile when i flip them off :)

Seriously, anger makes no sense to me in being dominated. If i'm feeling anger, i probably should be leaving.

< Message edited by anniezz338 -- 12/8/2011 9:40:51 PM >

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:37:19 PM   
submaleinuk


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/12/2011
Status: offline 		That's the thing, i can't suck anything up, it would make me feel I'll if I did

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:39:06 PM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		Dude, it's not our job to analyze you and figure this out for you... that's your job.

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:51:00 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleinuk

I know I do quite a lot, in real life I would say something but when I try bdsm
I don't, if I did say how I feel I think the mistress would get a shock, I doubt they'd like it
really, is this common or just me?


I think the reason you are having such a conflict is because you see BDSM as some sort of
fantasy world, and your interaction with a mistress as an act.



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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 9:54:45 PM   
anniezz338


Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleinuk

That's the thing, i can't suck anything up, it would make me feel I'll if I did


Sucking it up comes with the territory lol. I've had a couple of "that's not fair" moments....then i remember it is not a democracy.

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 10:10:09 PM   
MissImmortalPain


Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline 		I have to ask what you mean by real life. You say in real life you would say something but with bdsm you don't and it has me wondering if you are talking about a pro domme.

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/8/2011 10:27:44 PM   
caelestis


Posts: 195
Joined: 9/6/2008
Status: offline 		Why, specifically, do you get angry? From pain? From doing something you don't want to? From the feelings a scene brings?

I've been angry due to a scene before, but never at the Dominant.

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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/9/2011 3:38:31 AM   
Fornica


Posts: 2986
Status: offline 		Huh? When you try bdsm? Wtf does that even mean?
quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleinuk

in real life I would say something but when I try bdsm I don't



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RE: Do you get angry when your being dominated? - 12/9/2011 3:43:16 AM   
Killerangel


Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline 		No, I do not get angry when I am being Dominated.

Dude, you've made it abundantly clear that you have anger issues here and in other threads, I guess its good that you're looking for answers. To that end I'd like to ask....is BDSM the only place in your life where the anger happens?

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