How would you have answered this?

How would you have answered this? (Full Version)

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TxShrouded -> How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:09:44 PM)
I contacted someone who asked me the following question. When I did they said I was way off. I want to see how everyone else answers before I post my response. I just want to see how other would answer it.... ******************************************** This is a two part question to which answers of trust, respect, and all other such generalized answers are instant disqualifiers. Any man standing before a willing submissive may call himself a Dominant, but when may a Dominant legitimately and accurately call himself a Master? And there are significant differences between D/s and M/s, but what is the key element that distinguishes the two and why? **********************************************

JanahX -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:10:49 PM)
I would answer it : GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE - WHO CARES????

chatterbox24 -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:14:44 PM)
Say what? ALrighty then. Heres your answer 99.9% of you could live an entire lifetime and never even come close to masterhood.

DarkSteven -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:18:39 PM)
If she's screening people out on the basis of essay questions, I'm out. if she's interested in hearing and thinking about my thoughts, that's okay. if she has preconceived notions about what the "right" answers are and is holding sole decision power, I don't think I'd be up for her brand of submissiveness anyway.

ARIES83 -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:25:40 PM)
I wouldn't answer it, and I wouldn't ask people how they would answer it, I would just forget it.

TxShrouded -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:26:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: chatterbox24 Say what? ALrighty then. Heres your answer 99.9% of you could live an entire lifetime and never even come close to masterhood. Huh, I don't see how that really answer the question but on the same thought, some would say 99% of the subs out there aren't submissive, they're self involved narcissists using sex and "submission" do get a free ride....of course saying such wouldn't be helpful and it would be the typical petty, 'pay attention to me' shock value kinda thing you see from people who's only skill in life is being on the internet, so I'm glad I didn't say it

NuevaVida -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:27:45 PM)
I'd move on. The Mister and I discussed our views of what we felt master vs. dominant is, and sub vs. slave, etc. etc...but those came in the context of getting to know you conversations, and not as a first response to an email. The "instant disqualifiers" statement would instantly disqualify that person for me. [;)]

TxShrouded -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:34:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven If she's screening people out on the basis of essay questions, I'm out. if she's interested in hearing and thinking about my thoughts, that's okay. if she has preconceived notions about what the "right" answers are and is holding sole decision power, I don't think I'd be up for her brand of submissiveness anyway. Yeah, I'm of the same thought. I seem to see this more and more recently, subs/slaves who have the boiler plate mentality. They have a list of 99 points and if you don't agree or having a differing opinion you get "you're not a real Dom, you don't know what you're doing etc etc" as I said before, I'm surprised there seems to be a lot of kink intolerance here and a lot of people who have been in the life a year or two and have all the answers. Yes, there are a lot of dangerous 'Doms' out there and more than a few who are in this to get laid or are resolving the their mommy issues. When I see one or one of my sub friends asks me about something they said or did, I usually just advise them to avoid that person if something doesn't sound right. But, I don't presume to make a value or quality judgement about other people 'kink'. If I don't agree, I just don't interact with them.

TxShrouded -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 8:35:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NuevaVida I'd move on. The Mister and I discussed our views of what we felt master vs. dominant is, and sub vs. slave, etc. etc...but those came in the context of getting to know you conversations, and not as a first response to an email. The "instant disqualifiers" statement would instantly disqualify that person for me. [;)] Also, I agree.

Alecta -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 9:04:44 PM)
quote: if she has preconceived notions about what the "right" answers are and is holding sole decision power, I don't think I'd be up for her brand of submissiveness anyway. I'm not sure those are preconceived notions so much as just being sick of one or two word answers that don't show any actual understanding of the words themselves. OP, my gut response is "if you have to ask, you ain't got it"

DarkSteven -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 9:04:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TxShrouded I seem to see this more and more recently, subs/slaves who have the boiler plate mentality. They have a list of 99 points and if you don't agree or having a differing opinion you get "you're not a real Dom, you don't know what you're doing etc etc" as I said before, I'm surprised there seems to be a lot of kink intolerance here and a lot of people who have been in the life a year or two and have all the answers. No offense intended, but I wonder if their profiles may have red flags that you're missing. I've had no encounters with subs who were like that.

DomMeinCT -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 9:09:46 PM)
It sounds as if s/he's looking for help with a psychology course essay. I'd decline to answer and tell them why as well.

littlewonder -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 10:06:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TxShrouded I contacted someone who asked me the following question. When I did they said I was way off. I want to see how everyone else answers before I post my response. I just want to see how other would answer it.... ******************************************** This is a two part question to which answers of trust, respect, and all other such generalized answers are instant disqualifiers. Any man standing before a willing submissive may call himself a Dominant, but when may a Dominant legitimately and accurately call himself a Master? And there are significant differences between D/s and M/s, but what is the key element that distinguishes the two and why? ********************************************** Any man can stand before anyone at all and call himself a Dom. That doesn't make him one though. You can call yourself Ruler of the World. Still means diddley squat. For me a man calls himself a Master when he owns a slave. But again, you can call yourself a Master till the cows come home, doesn't mean you are one. For me personally, D/s is dominant and submissive and is usually less stringent and controlling. A sub has the right to say yes or no to anything that she wishes. M/s is Master/slave and is much more controlling since for us personally, means I said yes once. After that he has the right to do whatever he wants, whenever, however. I have the choice to leave or stay. Now like I said, this is my belief and how our relationship works. You can call yourself whatever you want and do whatever you want. In the end no one really cares except you and whoever you are involved with.

myotherself -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 10:43:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TxShrouded This is a two part question to which answers of trust, respect, and all other such generalized answers are instant disqualifiers. Any man standing before a willing submissive may call himself a Dominant, but when may a Dominant legitimately and accurately call himself a Master? And there are significant differences between D/s and M/s, but what is the key element that distinguishes the two and why? A man is my Dominant when he inspires submission in me. A Dominant is my Master when we both believe it to be true.

obis -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 10:47:23 PM)
I would let her know that starting out with such an adversarial tone is unlikely to lead to finding the best candidates for a possible relationship. Who wants to jump through hoops just to talk to another human being? And of course a Dominant has only a bachelor's degree in BDSM, while a Master has a master's. That's why I insist on being called Doctor, I spent 6 years at BDSM medical school.

LadyPact -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 10:56:17 PM)
I'm a leather person, so the first part is easy for Me. In My culture, a person is a Master when they have earned their leather. Since I realize that not all people are leather folks, I also add that when your slave is calling you Master in the dynamic that exists between the two, and the person in authority is running things, I certainly can't argue with it. If you have Mastered a particular skill, I'm good with that, too. Difference between M/s and D/s? That has to do with My personal definition of how much authority is given over to Me and how much obedience is on the other side of the kneel. It has to do with the level of ownership that has been achieved and the synergy that has grown to get there.

CHF73 -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 11:43:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven If she's screening people out on the basis of essay questions, I'm out. if she's interested in hearing and thinking about my thoughts, that's okay. if she has preconceived notions about what the "right" answers are and is holding sole decision power, I don't think I'd be up for her brand of submissiveness anyway. I totally agree with this. One thing is asking question to know someone and hearign about my points of view, my ideas, my thoughts. A different thing is if she does it just to screen people, thinking she's the only owner of the "universal truth" (don't think there's such a thing, but i might be wrong and still wandering in the dark since i haven't met her...). In this case not only i wouldn't be interested in her submissiveness and in a M/s relationship with her but probably not even in any other kind of relationship.

descrite -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/8/2012 11:55:50 PM)
What Jan said. Also, holy crap, these are some of the best answers in any thread, ever. Shroud nailed it, mentioning the rash of faux-subs recently. I think subbing may be the new girl-girl-action, in terms of stuff het chicks do to try to show how daring and sexually forward they are (hint: they're not; it's a sham).

kiwisub12 -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/9/2012 3:41:19 AM)
I wouldn't have answered it. and for the record, not every dominant wants to be called Master, so her premise is flawed on many levels. Though i have to admit, the whole essay thing would eliminate all those who can't string together more than a couple of intelligable sentences. [:D] also, the OP has thrown out some of the most amazing generalisations i have seen on cm to date. Very interesting.[:-]

SinFix -> RE: How would you have answered this? (10/9/2012 5:53:08 AM)
Fr I say kudos to the submissive for having a clear idea on what he/she is looking for and for utilizing a way to weed out any that are not compatible with him/her. I don't see how any of this makes them less or even faux submissive. It just shows how incompatible you both are and no time was wasted. Would I answer the question sure, but with the knowledge that what I answer and what the sought out answer is may not mesh.

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