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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 2:21:53 PM   
MMasterMM


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Com-on, even though spanking your child will land you in jail now a days.
I can't ever remember anyone ever being injured, maimed nor killed
- well other than self esteem
Usually one is aware if they are in close proximity of someone else that is out of control.
DON'T LET THEM BIND OR TIE YOU UP. BE YOUR OWN EXPERT

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 2:24:45 PM   
DesFIP


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With a hand probably not. With a paddle you could break the tailbone or impact the kidneys if you hit wrong. And both of those are extremely harmful.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 2:26:40 PM   
Hillwilliam


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I looked and have 2 expert tags.
Fishing. All I can say is that when I float the river alone, I frequently outfish the guides.
Wrestling. I was a 4x national qualifier and coached for several years.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 2:26:48 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


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I never use the Expert/Average/Beginner deisgnations. There is one exception & that was an accident. I clicked off Foot Worship and I accidentally clicked the experience level thing. Now it has to say something, meaning I can't just get rid of it totally, so I just clicked off average. If I were qualified to teach something, I'd say I was an expert, maybe, but I'm not so I don't.

NBMG

< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 2/17/2013 2:27:22 PM >


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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 2:46:05 PM   
LadyPact


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quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

FR:

"A growing body of psychology research shows that incompetence deprives people of the ability to recognize their own incompetence. "


http://www.livescience.com/18678-incompetent-people-ignorant.html
I wanted to take a moment to thank you for linking this article. I think we see a number of examples on this around here from time to time.



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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 2:58:26 PM   
Notsweet


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I noticed on Lady Pact's website that she teaches and presents at workshops. I've been to dozens of events where this type of workshop or presentation is given, and there are other people there who have been successfully practicing their own specialties--fire play, suspension, that sort of thing. And if anyone got up to present themselves as an expert and WASN'T, every soul at the event would know.

I'm lucky to have been able to attend enough of these events to know some people considered to be experts in their craft. In the national/international circles, reputation is EVERYTHING. When someone is merely checking off a box as expert on the other side, I don't take that seriously. When everyone you know knows who they are, when you can read about their classes and presentations, then you know you've got someone who knows their stuff.

I once took a class with Nina Hartley <grin>.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 3:10:55 PM   
LafayetteLady


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Great topic LP!

I was one of the ones commenting on the other thread about the "expert" tag. Some are just ridiculous. Like others, I went and viewed my profile (which I found could use some updating, lol), because I had no idea what I had even checked let alone the level of "expertise." I had many interests check, but no designations to ability at all.

I don't believe that someone needs to have your rules for an expert designation. After all, for many that would be impossibly high. Chatte's "rules" are more realistic to an extent, but not all of the interests are something that would even apply to being able to do something professionally (think masks).

For me, when I look at the interests and see lots of levels mentioned, even when they aren't all "expert," it makes me kind of question the person a bit. Are they a little OCD needing to be so specific, or do they feel it makes them look more impressive? I don't know.

I do know that for some things, I find the list very helpful. I'm monogamous, but have people write to me who list polyamory as a "lives for" interest. Obviously, something is a bit off for them to write to me (I make it clear I'm not looking for a poly household). Other things people list that are hard limits for me, tell me we aren't a match (even though the writer swears they could give it up).

I think some things should have a level of experience attached, and others shouldn't. Using a whip should have levels as should something like cooking; shopping, board games, flea markets, comedy shows shouldn't in my opinion.

I'm off to update mine.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 3:12:52 PM   
LafayetteLady


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That makes a lot of sense for those who attend public events. However, many of us don't, so there is no reputation to be made or broken, yet it doesn't mean that people can't be experts at things.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 3:19:02 PM   
littlewonder


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When someone says to me "but I can live without it" when it comes to things they say they are an expert at or they live for it, I immediately walk away. If you could live without it, you probably would have never even marked it as an interest at all imo.

It's why I've never once ever listed interests in my profile or ability level, because kink for me is a thing I really can live with or without so I see no reason to even list them at all. When I was single, I was after the person, not their kinks and fetishes and anyone who was looking for those things in my profile meant I was simply their fetish/kinky delivery system and not a potential partner in life.


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Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 3:24:10 PM   
LafayetteLady


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That's my point. They may say they could live without it, but can they really? Since I identify as a switch, those comments tend to come from those looking for me as a domme. Sure, I could *make* them live without it, but to me, I don't think it is a fair thing to do. If someone enjoys an activity enough to say "lives for" or even "loves," I wouldn't want them to give it up for me, and ultimately be unsatisfied.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 3:27:16 PM   
littlewonder


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exactly. When I met Master it was one of the things I spoke to him about asap. When he would tell me how much he loves something or wanted something, and if it was something I could never give him for whatever reasons, I made sure that we spoke intensively about what he could live without or without and why. I didn't want to be responsible for making someone miserable and then it being held over my head during the entirety of the relationship. I did not want that burden.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 5:28:10 PM   
LadyPact


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Such good comments!

Nope. That presenter designation was just a stipulation that I put on for Myself. I wanted that one, and the fact that people wanted the class repeated at another location, because I specifically had an interest in how the information was received. When you aren't good or don't know your material, they don't tend to ask you back.

If I wasn't presenting on any level (and this is My year away from big events) I'd still want some kind of guideline for Myself to specify the difference. Living for something or even loving it doesn't necessarily mean you know jack about it. I think it's interesting for people to share what that is for them and by result, what makes them not take people seriously when they claim expertise in too many topics.




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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 5:45:39 PM   
Duskypearls


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quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

FR:

"A growing body of psychology research shows that incompetence deprives people of the ability to recognize their own incompetence. "


http://www.livescience.com/18678-incompetent-people-ignorant.html


That is a brilliant quote!

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 5:52:19 PM   
Duskypearls


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I would not consider myself an expert in anything, as the more I learn, the more I learn there is to learn. I would go so far as to say I have a fairly decent level of skill in certain areas, but certainly not expert, at not at the very least in the BDSM realm. But then again, I am a relative newbie.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 5:52:32 PM   
kdsub


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quote:

pompous ass


lol...My middle name

Butch

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 6:12:13 PM   
kdsub


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I would think a test for a designation would help to educate people...even those that thought they were knowledgeable. There is no need for any test result to be public so the tests would just help people understand their desires better. What could be wrong with that?

Some sites allow people to submit tests that are binding to no one and the test results can be listed in a profile along with links to the test. Some tests are serious and educational and others are just for fun. An example would be okcupid.com. I think something of the sort would be a great addition to the site.

Either tests for allowed designations or just non binding tests for fun and education.

Butch



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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 8:14:13 PM   
muhly22222


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FR

After thinking about it a little bit, I came up with an analogy that works (for me, if I were ever to use the experience designations). I'm thinking in terms of sports, and specifically basketball. I don't have to be the most knowledgeable or skilled in an area to be an expert, but I would need to be a member of a small group that there would be some debate about how to rank us.

For instance, there's no question that MJ is the best basketball player of all time. That doesn't in any way tear down what Magic Johnson, Larry Bird, Bill Russell, Kobe Bryant, Wilt Chamberlain, Tim Duncan, etc., have done (and no, that's not my list, nor are they in order). Magic, Bird, and all of the others are still all-time greats, and people will argue endlessly over who should be ranked above who, who was better than who, and so on. On whatever topic it is, if I'm in that discussion, that's when I can call myself an expert.

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RE: Expert designations - 2/17/2013 8:48:24 PM   
Notsweet


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LafayetteLady-- Not saying they couoldn't be, but without public reputation, how could one know?

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RE: Expert designations - 2/18/2013 1:31:20 AM   
MariaB


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist


And apparently this "rope master" thinks that dropping people from suspension is inevitable. It had nothing to do with his own idiocy. He said, "No matter how much we study or train, know this: we will fail someday." Hmmm . . . so training and practice lead to failure? I always though it was stupidity that lead to failure.

As RedMagic's link said, some people are just too dumb to know they're dumb.

dropping a bondaged person

The Suspension Accident: It Finally Happened...



Thanks for bringing attention to that ResidentSadist.
We are presently writing a paper on man made fiber ropes which will include what happens to this sort of rope when it is softened, dyed, waxed, oiled and singed. It involves a lot of rope, a certain amount of expense and a great deal of time. What amazes me is, not a single bondage suspension 'expert' has carried out such tests. Is it because they don't understand whats required? if so, do they have any business hanging a model from it?

The problem is, many people choose to avoid looking at the obvious. Midori is a good example of that. There are so many 'Nawashi's' (self professed rope experts) and they follow people like Midori and hang off her every word. Midori is an artist in rope but she's not a physicist and she doesn't have a rope and anchor specialist following her around asking about her safety margins. She's MIDORI.... nobody questions such a person..... until now!

We can say that we are experts if we have given workshops, have a good reputation and have a following. Midori had all of those but she wasn't an expert. If she was, that accident would never of happened.

Anyone can set up a workshop. Anyone with good PR skills can convince others that they know their stuff. I have been to some pretty abysmal workshops, including rope suspension. Some of the practices/teachings were darn right dangerous. People watch on in awe and if they like you they will form your 'good reputation' without you doing any self promotion.

Someone mentioned we should take classes, pass tests etc. My question is, who are the examiners? Who decides that the examiners are expert enough to test others?

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RE: Expert designations - 2/18/2013 2:50:32 AM   
TAFKAA


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Okay, here's the sad fucking truth LP, but you're really not gonna like it.

Self-evaluated expertise is worth fucking nothing. The term "expert" is only valid in the context of an independent and recognised accreditation body of some kind. There are various psychological rationales behind this (namely that idiots and the inexperienced consistently overrate themselves whereas the intelligent and inexperienced do the opposite) but ultimately what it comes down to is that - like terms in every bdsm relationship - what the term means to you is a purely personal thing.

In other words, your question is on the same level as "What does the word slave really mean?" - there is no answer and all you're doing is looking for validation from an online forum. Your friends will give it to you, your opponents will not, assholes like myself will stomp all over the question and point out its inherently subjective nature.

A debate over semantics is exceptionally unlikely to prove fruitful.

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