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ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

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ORIGINAL: littlewonder

respect is earned. The people I respect are the people I can count on one hand. Why the fuck would I want to be respectable to complete strangers who don't deserve it? It would make my respect worthless for those who DO deserve it.

I think being respectful is different than actually respecting someone. Being respectful is a reflection of who I am. Earning my respect is a reflection of who you (generic) are.

I prefer to be respectful, even if I don't respect someone. I don't feel good about myself when I am disrespectful.

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ORIGINAL: kalikshama

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No, my dear, you are not the only one. I've been on here a year and a half, and tend not to ever post anything of personal importance, as I do not wish to become the recipient of, or embroiled in, the liberal, prolonged attacks and misunderstandings, willful or otherwise, I've seen others, often unfairly, receive and endure.

My life is hard enough, my health and hold on life is actually fragile and somewhat tenuous at times, and I do not wish to become the main dish in a feeding frenzy. I feel so sad about it at times for I have much to offer, but too often think/feel it unsafe to do so.

I've really enjoyed when you offer suggestions about helping animals and think you and I share some beliefs when it comes to care for humans as well. I wish you felt safe to post freely, but agree with your assessment of the possible outcome.

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ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady


I know we disagree with the entire "approach," but "tough love" is a legitimate one and you must admit that it is not simply for people we love. You don't need to use it and you don't need to like it, but you can't claim it is not a legitimate way of responding. You might think it is inappropriate, but it is considered a legitimate therapeutic approach. Certainly, a counselor using it with a client doesn't "love" their client, yet it can be useful.

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ORIGINAL: littlewonder


I don't call that being respectful. I call that giving common courtesy. Being respectful is in line with earning respect for me. common courtesy is just that...common. It's just being polite for the sake of keeping the peace.

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ORIGINAL: MsEloquence

LafayetteLady,

What "personal agenda?"
For the rest of what you wrote, I will continue to believe that the choice of harsh language has nothing to do with love for strangers, but instead reflects a desire to vent frustration at common obtuseness

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ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

I also get that you don't like all us "boorish" folk pointing out to you that we might be on to your personal little agenda ...

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Links? I generally don't do links. I'm here for the discussion moreso than other people's links to often specious and convenient "facts". A certain 'K' on this site (who isn't Kana) comes to mind straight up. In *this* thread, the OP called Kana a "fake" - yes or no?

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And as I said before, I like you and still do. Trouble here is that if your particular obsession with "fake" was only about you, you get to fob it off as a personal idiosyncrasy. But that's not what's happening; you keep making the newbie OP the bad guy for her right to defend herself with what's a "nothing" defence to almost anyone else. That's what's unfair and plain nasty. Your idiosyncrasy is not her fault.

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ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Riding in like a White Knight to defend the newbies. Congrats. Welcome to the world of idiosyncrasies.

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Oh, and, pst... the topic keeps coming up because you decide to try and tell me what I can and cant discuss, how I can or cant discuss it, and in what context it can or cannot be said. Last I checked, it wasnt your name on my lease, you dont pay my internet access, nor did you purchase my pc for me. Ahem....

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ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Oh hell, I dont wear armour.

I can agree with someone on one thread and disagree hotly with them on another. (with the exception of Lucy.. we just think too damn much alike!)

I dont let anyone cloud my thought processes when it comes to posting here. I post on what I want, when I want, and, within the allowance of the TOS, how I want.

Now, if you have an objection to someone who speaks their mind, then the problem is all yours. However, that problem is also hypocritical.

Lol, see, *this* is why I like you.

I think it was the old days at Alt.com where there was a profile box for subs to tick whether they're of a passive or assertive demeanour. Not her fault but I think the worst, most frustrating D/s relationship I ever had was with a passive sub.

Ask her for an opinion on something (you know, as in seeking a female or another adult's perspective) and to constantly get back "whatever you want/say/think".... ARRGGGHHHH!!!!! Nup, only "assertive" fem/subs need apply.

You certainly seem to be one of those.... Of course, "unattached" would help, too! And then there's that geography bizzo....

Focus.