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Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:24:50 AM

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
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Please share with Me what collaring is to you.

Sub/Slaves: What did it mean to you when your D or M collared you? What does the collar signify for you? How did it feel when it was placed on your neck?

D/Ms: What did it mean to you to collar your s? What does the collar signify for you? How did you feel when placing it on the neck of your s?

Not leaving out the switches either...just don't want to hurt myself with all the possible slashing. Switches please answer the questions as you feel they apply to you.

< Message edited by yourMissTress -- 7/18/2006 7:25:21 AM >

_____________________________

Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:26:58 AM

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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For me it mean's more than a wedding ring. I wear one of those yet we haven't made the bond close enough to wear a collar yet.
We're working on it. Where marriage can be torn apart by divorce there is no divorce with a collar. Till death do you part and then some.
So, you could say I take it very seriously.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:27:56 AM

Posts: 81
Joined: 7/8/2006
Status: offline

The collar means that I am truly His. When He placed it on my neck, I felt....a sigh of relief, contentment, and happiness. At peace with myself for the first time.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:50:19 AM

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress
D/Ms: What did it mean to you to collar your s? What does the collar signify for you? How did you feel when placing it on the neck of your s?

It was simply the physical acknowledgement of where the relationship and dynamic was already at. she was already mine, I had already taken up the responcibility for her submission.

Frankly *I* didn't need to use a physical collar. helen however did need it, if nothing else than it being something she is used too, something she emotionaly needs and a symbol to draw strength from when I am not actualy there. In some respects it is a 'security blanket' for her, it isn't what it is that is important but what it represents.

How did I feel when I placed it on her neck? Choosing, paying for and placing... I was doing My job, giving My girl what she needed in order to serve me better.

Then she turned around, her mouth saying "Thank you Master" whilst her eyes clearly said "I'm Yours!". I felt pride in owning such a wonderful girl! I felt lucky in owning her so compleatly.

Each and every time we are together, her eyes say the same thing and evoke the same feeling.... then she wonders why I smile so much

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:56:32 AM

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress

Please share with Me what collaring is to you.

D/Ms: What did it mean to you to collar your s? What does the collar signify for you? How did you feel when placing it on the neck of your s?

For me, a collar is a functional instrument. I attach no romantic meaning or emotional significance to it, other than to remind a girl of her place and animality.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:58:22 AM

Posts: 1221
Joined: 6/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress

Please share with Me what collaring is to you.

D/Ms: What did it mean to you to collar your s? What does the collar signify for you? How did you feel when placing it on the neck of your s?

For me, a collar is a functional instrument. I attach no romantic meaning or emotional significance to it, other than to remind a girl of her place and animality.

Same here, I only see it as another form of restraint.

(in reply to amayos)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 7:59:11 AM

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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For me it is a symbol that represents the fact that both of us want this Ds dynamic to be 24/7.

It has been very difficult for me as Fox heals from his past to accept that wearing it is difficult for him because of stuff it drags up from his past. We are working on a different symbol for him to wear.

I can understand his reactions though. In my own abuse I was choked and my mouth was covered so I can't even wear short necklaces myself and I can snap when my neck is touched.

Anyway, collars are very important symbols to me and he would wear it 24/7 if he could.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 8:22:05 AM

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Joined: 2/5/2006
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It meant I had become what I was meant to become - his slave. It meant he accepted my commitment with the seriousness in which I offered. It meant he was serious about his ownership of me, and had faith that I would rise to meet the bar he set for me. I begged his collar and it did not come easily. When it was given, I understood I would be his as long as I continued to please.

He has since stood by and helped me work through those times I did not please, and I am ever grateful.

I am a sap, so when he fastened it on me my eyes welled up with gratitude.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 8:22:24 AM

Posts: 91
Joined: 11/5/2005
From: London UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress
Sub/Slaves: What did it mean to you when your D or M collared you?What does the collar signify for you? How did it feel when it was placed on your neck?

As my Master has already stated the collar its self was something i needed it helps keep me on the right path when due to outside life we can not be together, its helps me remember when facing fears or decisions that im not doing so alone.

As for how i felt when he placed the collar on my neck, we were in a crowded place yet as the leather touched my neck everyone seemed to vanish and it became just us, it felt lik all the years of feeling lost and alone were meant to bring me to Him. i felt i could truely be at peace with myself like i had found the missing part of me, i was complete.

Thank You Master.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 8:40:47 AM

Posts: 249
Joined: 9/13/2005
From: Nashville, Tn
Status: offline

Hi Ma'am

Obviously the reasoning behind a collar has a great deal of meaning to me since I've yet to accept one... still searching for that person.
I think he probably existed in the 1700's .. darn, my timing never was right!

Respectfully,
~enthralled

_____________________________

A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's.-Jean Paul Richter

(in reply to spoilt26981)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 9:25:16 AM

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress
Sub/Slaves: What did it mean to you when your D or M collared you? What does the collar signify for you? How did it feel when it was placed on your neck?

D/Ms: What did it mean to you to collar your s? What does the collar signify for you? How did you feel when placing it on the neck of your s?

For me it really does mean simply making some sort of commitment- whatever the commitment is that you want it to be.

http://www.collarchat.com/tm.asp?m=427111&mpage=1&key=collaring&#427257
being collared

http://www.collarchat.com/tm.asp?m=410988&mpage=1&key=collaring&#411019
public collar

http://www.collarchat.com/m_291301/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#291301
Collar vs Wedding Ring

http://www.collarchat.com/m_287566/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#287566
Another Question Regarding the Collar

http://www.collarchat.com/tm.asp?m=323687&mpage=1&key=collaring&#323702
collars (2)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_287140/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#287140
Collar

http://www.collarchat.com/m_264867/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#264867
Sub Thoughts on collars

http://www.collarchat.com/m_248345/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#248345
collar before love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_247668/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#247668
ring or collar, what's the difference?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_219135/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#219135
What does a collar mean?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_190240/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#190240
collar or what else?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_187244/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#187244
Accepting a collar

http://www.collarchat.com/m_184946/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#184946
Timeframe for a Collar?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_177155/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#177155
collar (2)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_165733/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#165733
collars

http://www.collarchat.com/m_151638/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#151638
Collar Ceremony

http://www.collarchat.com/m_150934/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#150934
Losing the Collar

http://www.collarchat.com/m_132702/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#132702
From chat to collar

http://www.collarchat.com/m_124898/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#124898
Wearing training collar in public

http://www.collarchat.com/m_81449/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#81449
What are the collar types/levels please?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_80281/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#80281
When is the right time to collar?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_70392/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#70392
Collars and collaring

http://www.collarchat.com/m_61337/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#61337
Collar conundrum?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_59686/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#59686
Color of collars?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_55592/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#55592
Collars when?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_27368/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#27368
Kind of a collar question?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_11451/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#11451
Collaring a submissive?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_428/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#428
What is your definition of a training collar?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_402/mpage_1/key_collar/tm.htm#402
Multiple collars or single collar?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 9:29:42 AM

MsSonnetMarwood

Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline

For me, a collar signifies making a life commitment to each other on par with marriage - not something to be taken lightly at all. It's been a long time since I considered collaring someone, and I imagine it'll be a long time before I do again.

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 10:04:51 AM

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress
...What did it mean to you when your D or M collared you?...What does the collar signify for you?

It is the single most life-changing event that has ever happened to this slave, to date. this slave very much looks forward to the wedding ring that will soon be worn, but Master's collar holds a much deeper meaning for this slave. It meant that Master had accepted this slave as His property, something He does not take lightly. like sub4hire, it is not within this slave to consider Master/slave "divorce"~it simply is not an option. this slave believes it holds an even greater responsibility than traditional marriage in that there are no laws on the books governing the relationship or it's possible dissolution and one has to rely solely on the integrity of themselves and their partner.

quote:

How did it feel when it was placed on your neck?

it was very emotional for this slave~the closest descriptive word would be "blessed". it was the last choice this slave made for "herself", from that moment forward, there would be no more "I, me, mine or my" in this slave's vocabulary...everything that was previously "owned" by this slave, including her physical body, became His, to do with as He pleased, when He pleased. He and this slave became Us, the physical representation of our relationship as Master/slave was born--customized....with Master directing the shopkeeper to cut the silver links to exactly the length Master desired the chain to be.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 10:24:58 AM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

Did you ever see the last scene in Lady and the tramp?....like that

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 12:33:21 PM

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

I have been involved with two Doms, one in the past,and one in my present. I have never been collared. I consider myself exclusive with my Daddy. He doesn't own me yet, but I am his submissive. I do not think that a collar is necessary for a level of commitment in Ds, because we do not wake up suddenly committed, it is an evolution.

I will only be collared once. Collaring means I give ownership of myself to another. It means that I have agreed that his word is final in my life in relation to my life decisions. It means I will bend my life to his. Marriage used to be this way, but it has lost a great deal of its meaning. I want to be married to the person I give ownership of myself to also.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 12:40:43 PM

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Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

A collar is a symbol of a relationship.

It only has meaning for those in the relationship, the meaning they give to it.
I've been collared once. It was a surprise. To me it signifies "ownership". As a physical object, it is a reminder of who owns me and what is expected.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to juliaoceania)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 12:44:57 PM

Posts: 224
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress

Please share with Me what collaring is to you.

Sub/Slaves: What did it mean to you when your D or M collared you? What does the collar signify for you? How did it feel when it was placed on your neck?

D/Ms: What did it mean to you to collar your s? What does the collar signify for you? How did you feel when placing it on the neck of your s?

Not leaving out the switches either...just don't want to hurt myself with all the possible slashing. Switches please answer the questions as you feel they apply to you.

Being his 'collared submissive' is the single most important thing I am. His collar is a symbol and only a symbol of the commitment we share. It took a long time for me to ask for it and a longer time for him to give it to me but it is only the symbol for the relationship similar to the wedding ring (gotten a year after the collar).

When he handed it to me to place on my own neck I felt as though I was finally where I needed, wanted, and should be. Now whether it is on or not I know I am his for THAT collar I wear around my heart.

dawn

_____________________________

Beneath his wings, I can fly.

(in reply to yourMissTress)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 12:51:50 PM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: enthralled
Obviously the reasoning behind a collar has a great deal of meaning to me since I've yet to accept one... still searching for that person.
I think he probably existed in the 1700's .. darn, my timing never was right!

You and me both. ::sigh::

quote:

What does the collar signify for you?

For me it'll probably go hand-in-hand with the day I finally use the title Master...if I ever do. The closest way to describe it is it will be like a wedding band, just as master will be synonymous with husband.

The longer I explore this lifestyle the more I realize my attitudes, and beliefs, evolve and mature...so I'm not all that certian of anything the future might bring. The idea of a collar, and the title master, in a way don't hold the importance they once did for me.

Still, I have no desire to treat them casually, either. So, for now, I've set them aside.

I've come to realize that any relationship I enter will be D/s, since I just don't relate romantically any other way. The titles, the rituals, the trappings...they've just become little more than decorations at Christmas. Pretty, and symbolic, but not the true meaning.

_____________________________

Cin

quote:

My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to enthralled)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 1:00:12 PM

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

A collar is a symbol of a relationship.

It only has meaning for those in the relationship, the meaning they give to it.
I've been collared once. It was a surprise. To me it signifies "ownership". As a physical object, it is a reminder of who owns me and what is expected.

A collar is a symbol, collaring is a ceremony, collared =ownwership

kinda like

A wedding ring is a symbol, wedding is a ceremony, and marriage is a relationship?

just some thoughts....

Edited to say that we usually do not ask people what their wedding ring means, it is usually understood.. it is interesting that we talk about what a collar means, because it is not necessarily understood

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 7/18/2006 1:03:05 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to KatyLied)

RE: Please share with Me - 7/18/2006 1:19:02 PM

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
Edited to say that we usually do not ask people what their wedding ring means, it is usually understood.. it is interesting that we talk about what a collar means, because it is not necessarily understood

I think if more people asked eachother seriously what their wedding ring meant before getting married, then they would be on better footing going into it.

Plenty of people in bdsm and Ds don't ask this important question either and often end up doing catch up work and going through problems later because of it.

It's also simply a matter of the difference between "mainstream" and "sub-cultural" values and symbols. When you are raised and surrounded by certain values and images, it simply becomes part of your background matrix. When you then enter into a new culture, you are forced to examine things with a new perspective and ask the questions that you took for granted before.

This will change somewhat as people begin coming into bdsm at the age when most people begin getting into relationships, it won't be quite so much of a culture shock as it will be part of their normal process.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to juliaoceania)

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