quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkfeather

Women have beaten it into us until no one wants to argue, that as a guy, he should have no expectations. None when sending out that email, none for getting a response, none for continuing the conversation. We have it berated into us that, we should just accept a non answer, or sudden cut-off.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Phydeaux

No, putting effort into an email message does not statistically make a difference for guys. That is why the vast majority of mails from males are short.

If you have .005% chance of a reply with a simple hi - and a .01% chance of a reply to a thoughtful couple of paragraphs - it simply isn't worth our time.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Phydeaux

No, putting effort into an email message does not statistically make a difference for guys. That is why the vast majority of mails from males are short.

If you have .005% chance of a reply with a simple hi - and a .01% chance of a reply to a thoughtful couple of paragraphs - it simply isn't worth our time.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Husband1950s

You won the genetic lottery? 5'11" 175.? Are you fucking kidding ? You are a hideous oaf.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Phydeaux

No, putting effort into an email message does not statistically make a difference for guys. That is why the vast majority of mails from males are short.

If you have .005% chance of a reply with a simple hi - and a .01% chance of a reply to a thoughtful couple of paragraphs - it simply isn't worth our time.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkfeather

You want to know what pretty much every email I have received from women consisted of? One word sentences.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Husband1950s

You won the genetic lottery? 5'11" 175.? Are you fucking kidding ? You are a hideous oaf.

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar
I haven't heard any of the ladies complain they can't find men. In fact, all the ladies that have spoken up on this thread have been saying they've been really successful in finding men by contacting them. I myself have found several via this site.

To put things into perspective - my perspective - I haven't "found" anybody from this site in over 3 years of actively looking, not counting an off period when I had a sub. I found the last sub I owned on a different site (although it turned out he had a CM profile also), and we started out as friends. He had contacted me first (I rarely initiate contact, although when I do, I have had a 100% success rate, probably due to how exceptional it is.), and we started off as friends. He was cool with the fact that he was below my age range and never once tried to refute this, or anything else I knew I wanted in a future partner.

It just so happened to turn out after about 3 months that he was such an interesting man, and we had so much in common, that I it finally hit me one day that I had grown incredibly fond of him. But, he already had a lot going for him (suitability-wise), he was never pushy and he bided his time, just about every single message he wrote was thoughtful and engaging, and his gentlemanly persistence and attentiveness paid off. I have met men from this site, but nobody I would want to see again or start dating.

If a woman finds you interesting or intriguing, and you ask questions that are nonintrusive, yet show that you have taken a personal interest in the woman, then I don't know how you could get a short one-word or one-sentence reply. Darkfeather must not be asking the right questions or not saying the right things to make the woman feel special in any way. It doesn't usually take much to get a woman to be communicative. Even men who turn out to be uncommunicative will reply to my reply with a decent paragraph or two about themselves.

@Husband1950s, you don't even have a picture of yourself up, and you don't list your weight, just an unimpressive height of 5'9", so you are hardly one to call anybody else a hideous oaf.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Husband1950s

You won the genetic lottery? 5'11" 175.? Are you fucking kidding ? You are a hideous oaf.

quote:

ORIGINAL: betataster

@Darkfeather. I have no idea why you're selling yourself so short. You look like a perfectly acceptable fellow to me. I'm not a chick. I don't know, are you fishing for some validation? And to be perfectly honest, I wouldn't be surprised if the video games and Anime expand your base, not reduce it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

First, to the idiot that tried to make a dig on Ishtar, I'm going to say now that individual is a moron. I've met her. She's the definition of a pin up model. If I looked like that, I could be ruling the world. It's not faint praise. She really is that pretty.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkfeather

quote:

ORIGINAL: Phydeaux

No, putting effort into an email message does not statistically make a difference for guys. That is why the vast majority of mails from males are short.

If you have .005% chance of a reply with a simple hi - and a .01% chance of a reply to a thoughtful couple of paragraphs - it simply isn't worth our time.

THIS, this, this. You want to know what pretty much every email I have received from women consisted of? One word sentences. I see massive complaints about guys not putting the effort, not reading profiles, not meeting every criteria outlined before even setting finger to keyboard. Granted, the amount of emails I get, could be counted on one hand, minus a couple fingers, but the fact remains I have never gotten an insightful meaningful response to every iota of information listed on my page (for the record, about 80% of those minuscule emails, came from people who didn't even click on my profile). Now for christ's sake, I am in no way comparing my experience with that of the average woman's. Just that I have replied to far less, and had some interesting conversations because of it... Hell, I even had a 6 month interaction with a lovely slave looking to have me finance her relocation from Kenya, England, somewhere or other.

As for guys putting forth the effort, you know if you build an elaborate hand carved mahogany bridge every day, only to have it burned down/eaten by termites/ blown up/etc. every night, pretty soon you are not going to go through all that effort. Guys are pretty simple creatures, go to any mall in any state, and watch how long it takes for a guy to react if a girl just smiles at him. Hell, most of us jaded old guys would react to a point in our general direction. Motivation, effort, and reward (or lack thereof). Conditioned response, successful actions inspire more, failures inspire the opposite (yep, totally a Pavlov's dog reference)

DF, I don't know what it is, but you're doing it wrong. There is no reason why you shouldn't be having success.

(By the way, this was the first time in nine years I've looked at your profile. Your profile pic is awesome. I love the way the light is captured in your eyes. Your frame is good. The outfit more than neat. You've got great selling points. Why are you using that avatar when your pic could be doing so much more for you?)

I'm not going to try to blow smoke up your bum. Most males aren't going to get the response rate that I do. However, you could be doing a lot better. There is some great research that's been done by Ok Cupid that could probably be helping you. Same stuff women have been saying the whole time we've been here.

You're smart enough to read profiles. That's a given. Based on that profile, you only need to craft three or four sentences for initial contact. Make one a question about something she is interested in. That gets your foot in the door.

Conserve your time. Focus your efforts. It's all sales and marketing.